| 00:00.00 | Max Shank | Hello everybody welcome back to the max and mike Monday morning podcast today I'm pretty excited because we're going to talk about choices. We're going to talk about the difference between a mistake and an error and we're going to talk about the difference between a good choice. And a good outcome and you might think those are the same thing but actually they are not. You can make a good choice and have a bad outcome. You can make a bad choice and have a good outcome and if you want learning to really take place. It's very important to understand the difference between those. So. If you listen up today I'm confident that we're all going to make better choices that give us the result that we're looking for so thanks for tuning in mikey good to see you. |
| 00:48.15 | mikebledsoe | Good to see you? Yeah 1 of the reasons we chose this topic and by the way we usually choose the topic about 5 to ten minutes before we hit the record button and um, yeah I did a a mushroom ceremony a few days ago where. I was basically shown all the mistakes that I'm still paying for in my life right now. So as max had ah guessed accurately was I had my own personal hell for about 3 hours and it was. |
| 01:06.73 | Max Shank | Um, now. |
| 01:23.48 | mikebledsoe | Even though it was my own person at hell for a few hours it was really enlightening and and getting very ah getting to be at peace with what I had was witnessing as mistakes I'd made that I was currently paying for and also ah. Experiencing a lot of sadness around it and then by the next morning feeling a little better about it by the next the morning after that feeling even better and having an action plan on how I can more methodically pay off those. Mistakes or errors more quickly so I can get on with my life because yeah, as much as we would like to for me, it's it's as if I I've learned the lesson that came with oh that was i. |
| 02:03.19 | Max Shank | A. |
| 02:20.38 | mikebledsoe | Did not get the outcome I was looking for there that was not what I wanted to happen and I learned that years ago, but my bank account is still having to you know is money's being siphoned off for those mistakes. Even years later even though the lessons been learned so it's ah. It's an interesting life process that we're all in where we usually pay for those mistakes a little longer than we'd like to. |
| 02:48.17 | Max Shank | Always longer than we like to ah personally I want no negative consequences for any of my actions. But I think you bring up a good point because making choices is actually the only thing that we do. Everything is outsourced from choice making right? So. The only thing that we personally do is make choices even if that choice is to raise your arm up in the air you are making the choice but then your body It's getting outsourced to your body and then your body does that little task and. You know I'm pretty critical of all forms of media including podcasts because I think most media is a colossal waste of time now. That being said I think you can basically split up content. Into 2 categories better choice making which would be learning and entertainment and that's all if what you're consuming informationally content wise is not helping you better make better choices. Then it better be entertaining at least Otherwise what the hell are you doing and since that's entertainment.. That's that's 1 hundred percent ah mental masturbation like I don't like to watch horror movies but tons of people do so. |
| 04:07.71 | mikebledsoe | So I just want to be scared. Yeah, that's true. |
| 04:19.24 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 04:22.32 | Max Shank | Once again I'm not really into Kink shaming So like whatever you want to do to get your rocks off. But I think it's important to not pretend. It's something different and there's a lot of time invested into mental masturbation and if you think about. Differentiating between. Okay I'm going to consume this information so that I make better choices or I'm just going to flat out entertain myself. So It's important I think to not confuse those 2 things and for me. It's actually quite liberating because that itself is a valuable decision that enables me to be more mindful with what I'm doing.. There's no pretension for me when I'm consuming information I'm either consuming this because I think it's going to help me make better choices in the Future. Going to give me more of the results that I'm after or I'm just entertaining myself and it doesn't matter. Ah what your flavor is, but it's entertainment and then you also don't feel like oh I'm always I'm always trying to. |
| 05:29.24 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 05:35.82 | Max Shank | Learn new things. It's like yeah you know some of the stuff I learn. It's not really practical right now. But of course you never know. |
| 05:43.21 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean what you're getting at there is ah your you're intentional. You're intentional about oh I'm going to sit down and be entertained. Um, yeah. |
| 05:55.57 | Max Shank | And there's no shame there. There's no shame there. Whatever you like. |
| 05:59.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, my my intention a lot of times is to is to play. My intention is to let loose have a good time and play you know sometimes you know in the the plant Medicine Psychedelic World Community There's always this. |
| 06:06.25 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 06:18.99 | mikebledsoe | There's this heavy emphasis on setting an intention before you you take your get into take your substance and get into your experience and for years my intention was always to learn something and to get something out of it and then over time I go oh my intention. |
| 06:31.44 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 06:38.85 | mikebledsoe | 1 of the things I learned during during a ceremony is I go oh I can ah my intention could to be to enjoy myself and to play and that is just as valuable as anything else. |
| 06:45.70 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 06:51.76 | Max Shank | That in itself is a very valuable decision. Um I was mentioning to you before we hit record that I've been really getting into tennis a lot lately. I actually have a lesson on Wednesday with a guy who trains at my gym. Juan. And he's awesome and 1 of the most valuable pieces of information I learned about tennis is that there's a very important decision before you hit every ball and so we played we did this drill. And it was called offense defense and before you start your swing that is the first choice you have to make am I going to hit this ball offensively or am I gonna hit this ball defensively. And now when I'm playing matches I notice if I make a mistake with that choice right away I'll be like ah that should have been a defensive shot where I'll go oh I had time for that to be an offensive shot so that has been a huge improvement. |
| 07:57.29 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 08:06.53 | Max Shank | In my overall game because now there's no confusion as to the first choice that needs to be made I need to quickly decide. Okay do I have the opportunity to attack this ball offensively or is it important to. Hit a defensive shot so I can keep the rally going so I have time to maybe get an offensive opportunity later because tennis is 1 of the few. Yes, definitely tennis is 1 of those few sports where if you make an error. Ah your opponent gets a point. |
| 08:29.47 | mikebledsoe | Or a better 1 |
| 08:41.14 | Max Shank | You know in a lot of other sports if you make an error you don't necessarily get punished with a point loss immediately. But if you miss a shot in tennis your opponent actually gets a point so you speaking of paying for mistakes you pay for every error that you make. |
| 08:56.77 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well 1 of the things you said before we hopped on as well was ah we don't make mistakes we only make choices and a mistake is something that we can only look back on and notice and go oh and then which which. Occurs to me as you're just judging the choice because you didn't get the outcome. You're looking for and then that yeah, it's labeled retroactively and then ah going and then you continue to say something else, but this ties into what we. |
| 09:19.90 | Max Shank | Yeah, it's labeled retroactively. |
| 09:32.97 | mikebledsoe | 1 of the things we were talking about last show and that is making the right choice. None of is the last show or 1 of the previous shows making the right choice may not result in the desired outcome and so so. |
| 09:46.68 | Max Shank | Exactly. |
| 09:51.49 | mikebledsoe | You know, ah putting all the weight of a single choice for a specific outcome is is probably it experience. You're probably experiencing a little bit of tunnel vision because there's so many things that contribute to the outcome where outcomes. Ah and it's ah yeah, just. Got me thinking more and more about okay I've made choices which didn't give me the outcomes I desired and now I'm paying for them and and my judgment of those is to call it a mistake but it's also good for me to look back and go yeah that was I won't make a choice. Ah, all all. When I'm making choices that are like this I'm going to have to consider all these things that it becomes more obvious the things I didn't consider as I made those choices. |
| 10:38.80 | Max Shank | Absolutely and it also speaks to the heart of where I've been able to actually find some compassion because I used to think most people were just Evil Idiots. Ah, which is not like the most positive way to view the world. But I realize that everybody is always doing their best based on how they think and feel at the time. So based on the information they have available to them and based on their current state of mind. They're always making the best choice they can think of now a lot of times people make. Choices with their lizard brain only So they're not maybe using their full faculties but based on the tools that were available to them in that Moment. We're always making the best choice we have available and it's easy to. Judge other people because we don't really know their experience. So I think that I think that's really huge like you will be able to live a more comfortable life If You realize that people are doing the best with the faculties that are available to them. |
| 11:54.32 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 11:54.53 | Max Shank | In that moment and then you'll also be a lot more forgiving of yourself because um I can certainly speak from my own experience. But I think a lot of people who try to be high. Achievers are often very hard on themselves. And really, um, relive every mistake lots and lots of times because you're like oh I Just don't want to make that mistake again. I don't want to make that wrong choice again. So You'll be more forgiving of yourself. You'll be more compassionate of other people. And if you do that then you're going to be more in ah a love vibration instead of a fear and maybe even loathing vibration and of course then you also get to make better choices because as I said people always make the best choice based on how they think and feel. At the time. So if you feel afraid if you feel hateful if you feel judgmental you're not going to make as good a choices you're going to make Lizard brain choices. |
| 13:00.92 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 13:07.63 | Max Shank | Um, as far as the right choice but wrong outcome. Um I'll use tennis as another example so you have 2 things you have deployment and execution deployment is. What you choose to do and when you choose to do it. Execution is how you did it. So if I try to deploy an offensive shot at the right time. But I Miss. That would just be a problem with my execution. So the the way I did it wasn't very good. How I executed that decision was wrong and if you break up these choices into deployment and execution. Then you know where to correct it for next time. Because it's a totally different thing to make an error in deployment which is making the wrong choice versus an error in execution which is the skill that you used was inadequate to capitalize on the on the correct choice. |
| 14:15.50 | mikebledsoe | Go when I hear when they hear you say deployment I think strategy that it's the Ah how am I going to accomplish this this goal. |
| 14:28.48 | Max Shank | It's what you choose to do and when and the execution is the how you do it. So if you if if you deploy ah a punch at the right time if you choose a? ah. |
| 14:32.55 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 14:44.17 | Max Shank | You know the correct punch and you deploy it at the right time but you you do it too weekly or something like that or you do it too slowly or you're just off Target that would be an error. And the execution even though the choice that you made was correct. So I think of it as deployment is what and when and execution is how yeah. |
| 15:01.29 | mikebledsoe | Ah e. |
| 15:09.43 | mikebledsoe | I like that I like that well going back to that thinking about the high performers I imagine there's quite a few high performers that listen to this and going back in and dwelling on Mistakes. Ah. I I think ah so it can be a gift because that that can create a hyper performer and you just hyper analyze things. The drawback to that is all the emotional experience that comes with that or usually the emotional experience that drives that it's this It's this dwelling or this addiction to feeling that guilt and I know that's something that I dealt with at 1 point where I overindulged in feelings of guilt and ah which is really strange because if you were to ask you know people on. And a quick survey. You know, do you dwell on guilt or happiness more like wow it makes sense to dwell on being happy. But that's not necessarily the case and so there was a time in my life where I I dwelt on guilt and that. That was what was driving a lot of the the dwelling on the mistakes from the past and making sure I didn't make those same mistakes twice. So it's 1 of those things where it really was had a negative impact on the quality of my life in the moment but for but it did. Turn into a productive ah exercise now. The trick is and 1 of the things that I've learned over time is yeah, there's a lot of gifts that were given from these emotional states that cause a lot of stress or maybe aren't really that useful in in them in a. And themselves. But the product is good and so what I've learned to do better now I wouldn't say out I'm really great at it. But what I've learned to do better now is let's go okay, that was a mistake I can feel sad about making that mistake if I haven't felt it all the way through yet. But instead of instead of dwelling on it because I feel like shit but going back and being analytical and and feeling happy and feeling really excited. So 1 of the experiences I've had over the weekend is I'm really excited to put some changes in my life in order to avoid. Ah, you know making those mistakes in the future and it's you know you're doing it well because if you can get out of that lizard brain and go into the wizard wizard brain then you can come out with very ah, let's say. |
| 17:57.28 | mikebledsoe | Ah, practical things that you can do. They're going to ensure that you don't have to experience that again and then you can skip that and enjoy the success that you're looking for. |
| 18:07.94 | Max Shank | I Think you said a phrase that really speaks volumes which is you are indulging in feelings of guilt which it sounds like a ridiculous phrase. But but if you have ah. |
| 18:16.25 | mikebledsoe | Oh. |
| 18:25.46 | Max Shank | Ego self-image that thinks of yourself a certain Way. You're going to reinforce those currently held Beliefs. So I think that's extremely common, especially if you think of yourself as someone who does make good choices. And if you think of yourself as someone who is smart and conscientious and aware of things. It's going to hurt twice as bad if you make an incorrect choice. |
| 18:57.70 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah, well yeah, because now you know you make yourself pay for it in ways that you don't They're completely unnecessary. |
| 19:05.73 | Max Shank | And it kind of comes back to the emotion side of things I think of enthusiasm as social energy enthusiasm is a power in and of itself. You know there are you have force equals mass times acceleration you have work ah force times distance powers ah work over time you have all these different physics equations but enthusiasm which comes from being possessed by Spirit. Is an energy that is completely unique and it's the catalyst for a higher level of action because Hunger is the ultimate motivator right. And pain is a form of hunger so you can be operating from a place of deep hunger or even fear perhaps but when you're enthusiastic It's almost the same sort of desire which is another synonym for pain. But it's got to love. Vibration to it. So when you're operating from an enthusiastic place. You're look I don't know maybe you're gonna triple your output. You're gonna light a fire in other people like you wouldn't otherwise um. You're definitely 1 of those people who gets people excited about things like you're ah you're definitely an idea machine and you know you've called me several times over the years and I'll be like god damn that's a dumb idea and but but but even so. And you've also come to me with like a lot of brilliant ideas too. Don't give me ah, don't get me wrong here. But um, what I notice is the level of enthusiasm is contagious like I feel myself getting excited. |
| 21:14.35 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 21:15.33 | Max Shank | You know what I'm saying so that enthusiasm comes from being in a good place emotionally and as far as you know reliving the hell of your bad choices. Um, it is kind of like how we said. Depression is a luxury too being sad is a luxury like all these things are luxuries that are only available to you if you actually have all your physical needs. Met so ah. |
| 21:33.94 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 21:46.56 | Max Shank | You know the same thing if you can get to that place where you're enthusiastic. Which means that you're not punishing yourself for the past and letting your past ruin your present and future and if you find something where you can be enthusiastic about. You know sharing what you have with others you're going to make better choices and even if the choices um maybe aren't as good now I I still think. Ah, Overall you're going to make better choices if you're enthusiastic about it. You know you don't want to act too rashly I guess that would maybe be the only consideration ah with hyper enthusiasm. |
| 22:29.32 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think there's yeah well I'll speak of my own personal experience. Ah I am I'm a very enthusiastic person I I do get excited about a lot of different. Things and I get excited about my own ideas I get excited about other people's ideas or projects and um because of that I I attract a lot of people coming to me with their ideas and and looking for help and 1 of the things that I've noticed over the years is the majority of my. Some of my ideas are bad. Some of them are good and some of them are bad just because they're not for me to do I think I think a lot of my idea probably most of them are good just not for me. They're good for somebody to do ah and. |
| 23:14.32 | Max Shank | Right? um. |
| 23:20.58 | mikebledsoe | 1 things I've had to learn is that because it's easy for me to influence other people's enthusiasm and their behavior and getting them involved is there's been times where I have people on my team I get enthused about something I start talking about it. And I'm not telling anyone to do anything about it I'm just sharing the idea and then a few days goes by and I have a check in with the team and they've taken action on whatever it is I was I was discussing an idea with them and I and I was like fuck. We just wasted a few days of work because I actually didn't want. |
| 23:51.15 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 23:58.54 | mikebledsoe | Um, never even intended for you to take action on this was even my intention and now we are here we are going down this track and so I've I've had to learn how to um, be enthusiastic find specific people in my life I can share those ideas with that are not. Working for me or with me ah and to flesh them out and then I've also gotten a lot better about having ideas come in and go yeah, we'll just let that 1 I'll write it down the book write down the journal and then ah maybe I'll come back to it. You know, 2 or 3 days go by and I go. |
| 24:31.66 | Max Shank | And. |
| 24:37.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah,, don't really want to do that. But it was cool to to dream about it. So That's just ah, yeah, little little little things that I Found. It's also good to remember for people who may not share the same trade I have but do get enthused by other people. Somebody who has a lot of Charisma comes by and gets people all hyped up and for something for an idea. It's also good to check in with yourself is like is this is this the idea that I'm supposed to be involved with right now or am I just getting caught up in the enthusiasm and in The. Charisma of this person. |
| 25:17.20 | Max Shank | Yeah, and I'm almost the opposite like 1 of the services I offer is dream killing because I think that you can spend you can waste a lot of time going for something that isn't really a good fit for you or a really good. Ah, overall idea if you're overenthusiastic. However I come back to enthusiasm being social energy and who better to use and as as an example than Richard simmons sweating to the oldies like. When I was in my early twenty s I would like make fun of that sort of thing but dude richard simmons has helped more people get up off the couch than I have probably by a factor of a thousand or more. |
| 25:53.68 | mikebledsoe | Me. |
| 26:08.10 | Max Shank | And it's because he's just so Enthused. He's so excited about them dancing around in their living room and sweating to the oldies and so you can have what I would argue is a suboptimal product. But if you have that charismatic enthusiastic. Um, leader It doesn't even matter. In fact I would rather be invested into that business than someone who's got all of their kinesiology doctorates in order. Doing the perfect exercise. |
| 26:45.77 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I've I've witnessed that I ah ah traveled to travel the world finding the best of the best and kind of really figuring out that a lot of the people who have the best product or service. |
| 26:50.31 | Max Shank | Oh yeah, yeah, I've seen it tons of times. |
| 27:05.60 | mikebledsoe | Get very little attention and people who get the most attention you know will have a mediocre product or service. |
| 27:05.98 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 27:12.37 | Max Shank | They're in the basement pouring over the research papers while the ah dumb guys giving out high fives. Ah, after every set of burpees. You know it's like people people are like that people are like that. |
| 27:27.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well this why I like them I like to partner with people who are on the other side of the spectrum because if you is where partnership comes in really really handy is if you have if you have 1 person who's ah. |
| 27:37.56 | Max Shank | Huge. |
| 27:44.82 | mikebledsoe | The Enthusiast and the other person who is the what what would you? How would we want to categorize this other person. |
| 27:50.00 | Max Shank | Well I think I'm the other person so it's like how would I want to categorize myself. |
| 27:54.65 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that sound like you were calling yourself the dream Killer but. |
| 27:58.48 | Max Shank | The other guy the Dream Killer Sometimes Dream killing can be the absolute best thing a person needs like I will happily support a dream where I can see the benefit from it. But I think you you want both you want someone? you know my 1 of my friends used to say I was a sharpshooter That's what he would call me like I would just look at every potential flaw or weakness in the idea and do that with myself too. So It's not like I'm just a sadistic. Dude like trying to do it to I'm not just kill I'm killing most of my own dreams too mind you? Yeah yeah I Guess it's just. |
| 28:39.90 | mikebledsoe | He's also a masochist. |
| 28:48.49 | Max Shank | Yeah, it's It's the same way that I train myself and my clients like a lot of it is looking for weak points and not just reinforcing strengths. |
| 29:01.69 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean that goes would use so talk about deployment versus defense. Are you some is that right? not defense. Ah no, no, no I'm thinking about ah offense versus defense otherwise mixing those up. Ah. |
| 29:13.20 | Max Shank | Deployment versus execution offense defense. |
| 29:20.95 | mikebledsoe | So offense versus defense would you would you consider yourself somebody who is more naturally geared towards thinking of defense before offense sort of sounds like to me. |
| 29:31.31 | Max Shank | Yeah, 100 percent um 1 of the axioms I kind of live by is why risk what you need for what you don't need and I am 1 of those people who will be I can be really patient. |
| 29:39.71 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 29:50.50 | Max Shank | Um, so I'll just wait for the right opportunity now when the right opportunity comes up I will attack it so aggressively that it's kind of startling in fact, but I don't feel a need to be. Dynamic all the time or attacking all the time because I've recognized that if you are patient enough just like in jujitsu position before a submission like I'll just wait and wait and wait and when the opportunity comes then I'll go for the submission. But unless I'm just messing around with a friend I'm not going to be trying for any type of fancy aggressive Stuff. It's going to be slow methodical control control control don't risk losing position. Wait wait wait. Okay there's the position. Now boom super super offense all of the sudden. |
| 30:50.13 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I'm more naturally geared towards being on the offense I look back on my sporting career and yeah in sport and life way more on the offense ah lot of lot of swing for the fences. |
| 30:57.19 | Max Shank | No doubt. |
| 31:09.48 | mikebledsoe | A lot of failure but but also some success and I've I've noticed over the years ah is the thing that helps me out the most is to slow down and go on defense and it's it's ah it's a difficult choice for me to make to go in defense. |
| 31:19.75 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 31:27.62 | Max Shank | Not the. |
| 31:28.40 | mikebledsoe | It's not what I want to do but when I do it I So That's when I usually see really great progress or and I've learned to wait for that that moment to Strike. Ah, but when when it is time for that moment to strike there's you're saying that it's startling. How how aggressive it may come out as because I've got a lot of practice being aggressive. |
| 31:51.96 | Max Shank | Right? And there's kind of another thing to consider here too which is um I've heard it described as the strategy paradox where what works for another person would be like the worst thing you could do for yourself. |
| 32:08.76 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 32:11.50 | Max Shank | So you could be 1 of those people who wants to value invest and just purchase um shares of companies where the financials are strong. There's steady growth and you don't really go outside of your comfort zone. You're probably not going to lose all your money doing that on the other hand, you're probably not going to become very wealthy very fast because risk and reward are usually proportional to 1 another. However, if you are you know. Buying options on penny stocks with borrowed money you have a chance to maybe 10000 x your money. But you also have a chance to lose all of your money times 10 so so ah and that kind of goes along with another bias which is survivorship bias and the best example I have of that is Richard branson if you've ever read his autobiography to a more defensive minded person like myself and methodical. Just gave me like heart palpitations because every every other chapter he's like mortgaging his life away and borrowing another millions from the bank and shit's going wrong and you know he's got a music company and everything's finally going well for him. Everything's finally going well like he never had like a lot. It was always just reinvest reinvest and then things finally go well and he's on the board at virgin music. They got a ton of artists and he's like yeah so I'm gonna I'm gonna start an airline I got to buy a. An airplane and I need another 1 hundred million dollars. So I'm going to start selling stock and borrowing and his partners in the music company wanted to kill him they they hated him they hated him. He's like they hated me and. |
| 34:16.78 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah. |
| 34:21.28 | Max Shank | The first test flight ah he like hit a goose or a duck so he needed another fifty million dollars to fix this plane like a 7 forty 7 or something like that. So now he's he's. You know he owes 1 hundred million or something to the bank of England or whatever it was I think it was like the Royal bank of england and he's just like begging them to give him more time and it worked out for him. But anyway, that's the survivorship bias just because it worked out for him. There. Ah, 110000 guys who made similar choices who lost everything so you can't necessarily mimic that and think that you're going to get a better result, especially if it doesn't match your personality type either. |
| 35:05.49 | mikebledsoe | Well you you got to consider you know Richard branson he he likely thrives in chaos and so having that that stress is something that that causes him to to get shit done that needs to get done whereas. A lot of people would collapse. Um, there's ah, there's there's 2 other personality types. This makes me think about and 1 is ah when when if 1 personality is which is which is me if you're really far ahead. |
| 35:25.42 | Max Shank | And. |
| 35:44.16 | mikebledsoe | Plenty of money's coming in. Everything's going great all that I have this tendency to want to take my foot off the gas I celebrate the victory. It's like okay life is good. Let's let's do something with this money. Let's let's you know, chill out and. The other personality is somebody who who is ahead and that's motivating like oh we're ahead. Let's get more ahead and more ahead and more ahead. But the flip side of that is it. This is probably where Richard brenson and I have something in common which is if you're behind the 8 ball That's when shit's getting done. That's what I'm making moves highly motivated logging the hours I need to be hyper focused on the things that actually matter not all this other bullshit in the business that that may be just a waste of time. |
| 36:25.60 | Max Shank | Further. |
| 36:38.56 | mikebledsoe | Um, really gets hyper focusedcused and then that person that really enjoys being ahead and is really motivated when when things are going well a lot of times that personal collapse in that space and they they're just kind of like give up and so I've been in situations where um. Been on teams where ah things are going when things are going well people are unhappy with me like why isn't mike doing more to help us keep getting ahead and and then when she hits the fan. They're like mike what do we do and I'm like okay I'm taking over everything. |
| 37:01.96 | Max Shank | That. |
| 37:13.95 | mikebledsoe | Um, now it's like command and control. There's a military operation. We're gonna We're gonna make these moves and so in in the funny thing is is part of me hates putting myself in those positions but the other part of me loves it. It's exhilarating. |
| 37:16.49 | Max Shank | The. |
| 37:31.90 | mikebledsoe | It's like ah this is what life is about like let's fuck shit up. You know so it's it's a very interesting thing to keep in mind and also know who you are in those situations because 1 of once I got hit to that knowledge I started saying oh I don't need to put my. |
| 37:33.49 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 37:48.81 | mikebledsoe | Business partners and loved ones through this stress I may find it exhilarating but they don't fucking like it and it's not good for them and it's probably not good for the business either. So really learning to honor both types and use both types when necessary and not needing to get. |
| 37:55.50 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 38:07.96 | mikebledsoe | Really far into the extreme of 1 or the other um and that's probably what leads to getting into an extreme or 1 or the others you go too far to the extreme of 1 and then the pendulum will swing so going right back to doo de jing right? like the middle way. |
| 38:18.72 | Max Shank | You know you know it makes me think of something I believe is very important which. I think is hard for people to understand and if you are locked into a mission. You're trying to figure out how much you can do. And if you're looking for a retirement business or an income. You're trying to look for for financial Freedom You're trying to find out how little you can do and that is a huge difference and. Tying it back to choices. Maybe it's not that hard to understand. Actually maybe it's simple to understand if you have a clear Mission. You're gonna be trying to do as much as possible with that mission. If you are just looking to free yourself Financially, you're going to be looking to do as little as possible and if you have a clear mission choices will come much more easily because they should all be pointing in the same direction and that's where that. Ah, enthusiasm which is possessed by spirit comes in even more handy is now everything every decision you make is pointed toward that singular point of focus and it goes back to what we were saying about having your focus be dissipated. Into more of a lantern versus a laser beam where you're hyper focused on 1 thing. So I think that's a huge distinction is um, mission versus ah, let's say a financial goal because with that you're going to be trying to do as little as you can. Um. |
| 40:19.30 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, but. |
| 40:25.33 | Max Shank | Like that's my goal for investing of course like I'm not trying to do as much as possible I'm trying to do as little work as possible but have as clear and consistent a reward as possible versus our mission here to enable people to free themselves and make better choices. Which has a network effect. That's more about seeing how much we can do right? It's totally different. |
| 40:48.69 | mikebledsoe | yeah yeah yeah I um spend the majority of my life on the mission side and it it was interesting. It's been interesting because hearing you say that. How many times I set financial goals because I just felt like we're supposed to set financial goals and the financial goals revolved more around if we do this much then we can make this much impact in the way that we want and in the last few years it's become much more become much more on the. |
| 41:09.49 | Max Shank | The. |
| 41:17.40 | Max Shank | And. |
| 41:24.10 | mikebledsoe | How can I do less and ah make as much money as possible doing as little as possible and so I think the the balance there's a balance on those 2 as well is can can you be conducting and. |
| 41:24.35 | Max Shank | Okay, the. |
| 41:30.60 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 41:42.87 | mikebledsoe | And activities conducting activities with as little effort as possible that have a meaningful outcome and that way you can check both boxes which is the financial freedom box as well as the mission box and I see that a lot of people have ah. Don't see how they can do both and a lot of people walk away from a lot of money because they want to be more purpose driven and they actually associate the the making of money as something that's taking away from their purpose which you know. |
| 42:03.10 | Max Shank | A. |
| 42:19.54 | mikebledsoe | Their attraction to it might be the thing that is but but I'm a firm believer and what I've been experiencing is high high mission orientation but also holding at the same time. These things could be. Ah, paradoxical to some people which is ah you know, being on mission and how do I create financial freedom for myself. My family and work as little as possible. |
| 42:48.90 | Max Shank | I think the best way to get to the heart of that discrepancy is to focus on even trades like a win-win situation because if you put yourself into a position where you're just sacrificing. There's not going to be It's not a 2 way street. Basically so if you are dedicated to a mission but you're also selling that service for a price that you believe is worth it to you and makes it worth it to them. That's where you can have mission and financial goals kind of coincide I think. |
| 43:32.39 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, you got it I mean I've been in the place where I invested reinvested all my money into the business and wasn't looking out for myself at all and and turned into a lot of sacrifice which just turned into ah an unsustainable way of living because. Moment The business didn't do well I wasn't doing well and it's hard to make good business decisions when you're experiencing financial scarcity and yeah, yeah, so. |
| 44:02.85 | Max Shank | And gambling they say you're on Tilt so you make bad choices I always take half my chips off the table before I move on to the next thing I never but but also I'm I'm limiting how much I could earn so. |
| 44:10.44 | mikebledsoe | So I That's a good idea. |
| 44:18.66 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 44:22.33 | Max Shank | It's just you got to figure out your appetite for risk and that's a whole that's a whole other thing. |
| 44:25.44 | mikebledsoe | Well 1 thing I noticed is when I started looking out in taking care of my own position better I made so much better decisions for the business or businesses if I'm comfortable I can make good decisions if I'm not then then I may make. You know something that makes more money in the month this month but doesn't set us up for success in 1 2 3 years |
| 44:47.85 | Max Shank | I Only ever wanted freedom from the time I was very young kid I didn't realize I also wanted love but I didn't really just I didn't see that path So I want love and freedom and money is really just a means to buy freedom. |
| 45:04.39 | mikebledsoe | Is. |
| 45:06.97 | Max Shank | And I think you you can have ah the most important thing is is fuck you money where you just have the freedom to say no to anything you have the freedom to say no to opportunities to requests to threats to. To whatever you're just like ah no and you don't even have to be ah like smarter once you get to that point you just it's like playing home run derby at that point. But there's no penalty for not taking a swing like you are just doing everything from that position of fuck you. So you don't have to um, be blinded by the lizard brain. You can really just let the wizard take charge there when you're in that fuck you money type of position now. There's another level which is fuck me money which is where you can like Torpedo. Yourself your street credibility. You can literally just say whatever you want, you can get excommunicated from society and then you'll like still be okay, um, and that's that's a whole other thing where people where people have so much. They're just like yeah I'll I'll totally destroy. Ah. Myself full on character assassination because I just don't care. |
| 46:25.72 | mikebledsoe | Who was it Um, the guy who did all the virus software. Ah, ah, the kaffy I think I think he experienced that fuck me. Ah I mean I mean he did end up in he then and end up in jail. |
| 46:34.33 | Max Shank | Mccaffy. Yeah yeah, guy was an animal that was a scary thing. |
| 46:45.34 | mikebledsoe | But ah as a very interesting and anyone wants to go look up his story I don't know where to look it up because I've I've been following it from many different perspectives. But ah yeah, he's 1 of those guys that made fuck me money was living abroad and was. Pulling all sorts of shenanigans and even after his death. It looks like he's pulled some shenanigans. There's been things are being released in the wake of his death. So It's a. |
| 47:05.00 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 47:12.45 | Max Shank | Yeah, apparently he had like a lot of information that was very incriminating about certain things within the United states and the the powers that be. |
| 47:16.99 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 47:30.79 | Max Shank | As they say yeah. |
| 47:32.89 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, so yeah I like that. Well I think um, you know, maybe that should be that could be a course fuck you money is ah it's a. |
| 47:42.89 | Max Shank | Fuck you money I'm surprised. That's not already a thing because if you think about it. There is no other reason to get it like you people want security. Yeah, but freedom is the ability to say no, That's all. That's what freedom to me. That's how you could boil it down Freedom is the ability to say no because if you're addicted to something it means you're enslaved by it means you can't say no to it anymore whether it's a substance a person which is like a different type of codependency. Um, whatever. If You can't say no, you're enslaved and we're enslaved by all sorts of things and it's okay to be enslaved by you know I'm a slave to Oxygen and water and food. But I Really think the. Core of freedom is the ability to say no. |
| 48:41.43 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think that's that's a spot on I mean there's. |
| 48:46.55 | Max Shank | We could call it. No thank you money if we wanted to have it be like a little bit kinder. |
| 48:51.24 | mikebledsoe | If we can if we if we want to run ads to it on facebook. |
| 48:55.58 | Max Shank | How to how to get? No thank you money. |
| 48:59.74 | mikebledsoe | Ah, doesn't have the right ring man I'm not sure that's going to stick. Yeah, that's ah, that's an important thing and ah that freedom is the ability to say no, it's that's that's an extremely powerful comment. |
| 49:03.59 | Max Shank | It's not the same as fuck you money. |
| 49:18.91 | mikebledsoe | That's because it's not just about money having enough money to say no to anybody. That's that's definitely a lot of Freedom. The the freedom to say no somebody you know is wanting to do something to you or asking you to do anything the ability to say no is freedom if if you're being. If you if that the ability to say no is is removed then yeah, you're a slave makes perfect sense. Yeah. |
| 49:47.16 | Max Shank | Substances and peep substances relationships too right? You know you get a you get a craving for the demon rum and you can't say no then you're not really free of it. |
| 49:59.16 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well, this also makes me think about boundaries and and ah and you know the word sovereignty comes up and it used to be that the only sovereign beings that existed on the planet were royalty and so there was. |
| 50:15.11 | Max Shank | Center up. |
| 50:18.20 | mikebledsoe | There's a couple of you know there's a family that were all sovereign which meant the rules didn't really apply to them and then there was everybody else that that was underneath them like that like the Queen of england still doesn't follow doesn't the rules don't apply to her to even to this day. So. Ah. |
| 50:37.16 | Max Shank | Wouldn't it be amazing if she just started like a Jack the ripper like serial killing spree in England or something like that. She just went out and started murdering. |
| 50:45.16 | mikebledsoe | I think she's on her last leg I don't know if that's gonna be possible, but ah, the well the idea of like I mean that was the the idea of the founding in the United states was more of bringing sovereignty to the individual and. When I think about. So yeah, it's all about saying no. |
| 51:05.18 | Max Shank | It's all about saying no, it's all about resolving. It's all it's all about resolving conflict on an individual basis like the free speech is basically the right to say no firearms is basically the right to force the issue. No. |
| 51:15.58 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, yeah, and well I think about Sovereignty I think about royalty and 1 of the things that that kings and. |
| 51:26.38 | Max Shank | Even the third amendment even the third amendment is no. You troops can't stay at my fucking house. The fourth is no. You can't search my shit. The fifth is no I don't have to say a god damn thing like it's all about. |
| 51:32.63 | mikebledsoe | Right? right? yeah. |
| 51:43.28 | Max Shank | Freedom is all about no. |
| 51:43.36 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're right beautifully said so I think about Sovereignty I think about kings and queens and what do kings and queens have is they have a territory and they have boundaries and and those boundaries is. |
| 51:56.79 | Max Shank | M. |
| 52:02.55 | mikebledsoe | Are set and if you cross those boundaries you're going to suffer a consequence whether those boundaries be physical boundaries as in a physical wall around a kingdom or the boundaries of of we do this and we don't do though that you know if you break this rule if you pat cross this. Conceptual Boundary then you're going to experience some type of punishment and so ah I incur that I think a lot of people don't experience freedom or the degree of freedom that they could have simply because they don't know how to they don't even recognize their own boundaries. Ah, usually they don't recognize that their boundaries been crossed until after it's been crossed and it was crossed because they didn't know it was a boundary and so they never communicated it So It's it's your duty if you want to be free. It is your duty to. Communicate those boundaries in a way that people can hear them and then if they cross them after you tell them don't cross this boundary and that is impeding on your own on your shit then you know the use of force is is what may be necessary and is. |
| 53:12.13 | Max Shank | Where do you think we got the phrase draw a line in the sand That's literally drawing a boundary as an actual line that you are drawing. |
| 53:16.89 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, is there? Yeah yeah, you've crossed this line I'm gonna punch you in the throat. So. |
| 53:29.14 | Max Shank | And what you said there is key to because it's not just for physical. It's for energetic stuff too and I'm I'm sure I've talked about this a few times most of the stuff you hear me say that sounds. Really wise or something I've probably written down like a Hundred times. So. It's not like I'm just coming up with this stuff off the cuff be like oh wow that guys. no no I just write down a lot of stuff. Ah energy vampireism. You know where people are trying to get free psychic energy from you from. Unloading all their problems on you trying to get sympathy or complaining or whatever. Ah, just like the mythology of um, actual vampires. They cannot come inside your house unless you invite them in same thing with energy vampires. Unless you invite it in they can't get any of that free psychic energy from you I'm notoriously bad at listening to complaining because I don't tolerate it I draw a boundary to it because on the 1 hand. Yes. Every complaint is a request. But if you actually have a request then it's not complaining anymore. You're asking for help. You're asking for advice I'm 1 hundred percent down to get with that. But I'm not going to be the I'm not going to be the victim of. |
| 54:59.19 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 54:59.44 | Max Shank | Energy Vampurism and I think a lot of people don't draw those boundaries because they're afraid to they're afraid to just say stop. You know like I don't want you to keep talking at me like this because they're afraid like oh they won't like them anymore or whatever. |
| 55:15.91 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, a lot of people I've had to learn how to draw boundaries people don't complain to me either. Um I've had family members start to complain to me. Ah, and I remember a few years ago I got very. Strict around the boundaries around that and there' was a couple of my my family members had reached out or I was having dinner with somebody and I was like I'm just not gonna talk about this? Ah, ah, yeah, I'm not gonna sit here and listen to um, gossip and and they go. You know of course and like I'm not gossiping I'm like it's gossip and I'm not gonna I don't participate in it and ah it it was jarring for them. Especially if you start setting boundaries that you did not previously set. |
| 56:08.61 | Max Shank | That's gonna be a shock to the system. Whoa Whoa Whoa Man What changed I did I'm not sorry, but. |
| 56:13.65 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, it's people will people have have cast you as a character in their movie and they expect that character to behave a certain way and when that character does something that's out of character it it ah causes a little. Little rift is it's like the glitch in the matrix. It's like they they start to see oh this is my movie just got fucking ah just jumped the frame I don't know what's going on and I feel threatened. You know a lot of people feel threatened by it because. |
| 56:50.73 | Max Shank | They're totally hooked expectation exactly they're hooked on predictability. It's like that quote the only reasonable man I ever met was my tailor because he took my measurements anew every time he saw me. |
| 56:51.38 | mikebledsoe | Their expectations aren't being met. |
| 57:03.86 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 57:06.50 | Max Shank | Versus everyone else. They just have their memory like oh Mike acts like this and then you're like hey I don't act like that anymore and I'm like oh my God My illusion is shattered like I don't because your brain is such a prediction machine. |
| 57:08.91 | mikebledsoe | And. |
| 57:18.36 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, it makes me think about ah the time I saw I every once in a while I'll spend some time with my ah buddies from high school I'm in ah I'm in a text message thread. But with these guys and the lives that we're living are. Very different I won't I won't say they're as different as they as they could possibly be but they're incredibly different I've I've grown a lot in a different direction and sometimes I hang out with them and I can and they want to hang out and I go hang out with them and it's it's ah it's awkward. For them. Ah a lot of because I'm comfortable with me but they start treating me and talking to me about things that I used to care about or um, they they expected me to relate to them and in an agreement on things and then I don't agree. Ah. And I want to have ah a different com. You know I take the conversation in a surprising direction and I can just watch the discomfort seeping in it's like now that they they want to hang out but now they're looking forward to me leaving. |
| 58:29.47 | Max Shank | I mean it sounds an awful lot like Gossip mike um I'm sure that I'm sure that. |
| 58:35.95 | mikebledsoe | I bring it I bring it up I bring it up to like these are these are things to expect when you set new boundaries or when you experience growth and. |
| 58:44.63 | Max Shank | Um, well when the tribe says yes and you say no, they're gonna go huh and so that's it's just another layer of freedom am I Free to say what I want am I free to do what I want and people are actually. |
| 58:50.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 59:04.56 | Max Shank | Shockingly free we are we are part time enslaved because we got to work for the man ah percentage of the year but overall historically speaking we're like crazy free. |
| 59:18.44 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, more more free than than ever before. Yeah, and then there's the yeah, the the ability to choose your freedom is extremely high. The amount of people that even understand how to choose that. That's. |
| 59:20.15 | Max Shank | As free as you choose to be really. |
| 59:37.56 | mikebledsoe | Seems to be pretty low. |
| 59:37.91 | Max Shank | Well people enslave themselves with destructive behaviors way more than other people enslave them I mean I'm I don't I guess I'm not a hardcore libertarian I'm really more of an objectivist. I guess but I do believe in free choice being a better result than centralized control. Ah 99 percent of the time just because the risk reward's not good. Um, and where was I going with that saying that we're Better. Ah. Yeah, we are way more enslaved by our own choices within our own lives than we are by some external authority like we're slaves to food. We're slaves to media. We're slaves to a dopamine loop. Within our own mind. We're slaves to a cultural norm that probably sucks. It's like oh I've been conditioned to believe this is good. So now I'm going to sacrifice a lot. To get this result that I've been told is really good. Ah college student loans. Ah the concept of ah traditional marriage has positive and Negative. Um. It there. It just goes on and on and on and on and on and so it's tricky because drugs or addictions are a type of enslavement and it's where your choice gives you a result that you. Intellectually don't want but practically you can't avoid that whether it's um, scrolling Instagram or pornography or actual like heroin or crack or something like that. Never tried crack but I've heard It's really good people sacrifice a lot so they can keep doing crack ah food. |
| 01:01:48.43 | mikebledsoe | I've heard. It's really good too I told I had someone once tell me, you should try a crack sometime just don't know where to get it more of it. You want to make sure that you only have 1 dose because if you know where to get more than you're fucked. |
| 01:02:02.63 | Max Shank | Yeah, you and I are certainly not clever enough to find crack. Are you kidding me. |
| 01:02:17.85 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 01:02:17.93 | Max Shank | I would have like a I would have like a boulder full of crack within 2 hours if it was like really the best thing ever a crack boulder but with food food and choice. That's why look I have this video. Ah. Does fasting solve everything and it's all about what we're talking about because food is the most interesting of all the drugs because it's the only thing you cannot completely abstain from like you cannot quit cold Turkey Cold Turkey It is impossible to have. |
| 01:02:48.90 | mikebledsoe | Well. |
| 01:02:56.49 | Max Shank | No food whatsoever. So you're always having some food imagine if you were like trying to quit heroin but you had to have like 1 hit a day just to survive that would be insane. So. |
| 01:03:09.54 | mikebledsoe | I Think that's how it works after you get addicted. You can't go cold turkey with it. You have physical withdraws. Yeah yeah. |
| 01:03:15.98 | Max Shank | Ah, heroin you mean I mean you can. It's just painful but like you could quit heroin cold turkey and never do it Again. Same thing with opiates same thing with ah like booze and stuff like that I mean it depends how far I'm not a doctor. So. If You're currently a heroin addict and looking for my medical advice then I would say look elsewhere. But. |
| 01:03:37.30 | mikebledsoe | I Think there are other things you can do to win yourself off other than just stopping I think that's there's a safer. |
| 01:03:42.44 | Max Shank | Yeah, oh totally. But it's possible to stop doing heroin completely once and for all like once you get to zero but you can't do that with food and that's why I have this video called does fasting solve everything because. |
| 01:03:50.26 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, right. |
| 01:04:01.14 | Max Shank | It's the core of hunger and it's the core of decision making and as I mentioned Hunger is synonymous with desire.. It's synonymous with pain right? So if you can get that choice under control I think it. Gives you the foundation to get all your other choices under control because it changes your relationship with hunger with pain with desire with motivation. |
| 01:04:32.76 | mikebledsoe | Got it makes perfect sense. Go watch that video folks where is that video ton you? What do people search for does. |
| 01:04:43.98 | Max Shank | It's on Youtube does fasting solve everything. It's on my youtube channel. |
| 01:04:51.17 | mikebledsoe | This fasting solve everything anything else. You want to mention before we go. |
| 01:04:54.64 | Max Shank | Um. I Mean we talked about a lot of stuff I I think I think we kept it pretty close to choices. Um, what are some of the big important things that we talked about we talked about. |
| 01:05:01.60 | mikebledsoe | We did. There was a broad subject day. |
| 01:05:18.87 | Max Shank | Ah, the difference between a good choice and a good outcome. We talked about the difference between deployment which is what you choose and when you choose it versus execution which is how you do it. We talked about offense and defense. We talked about being in. |
| 01:05:33.25 | mikebledsoe | Offense and defense. |
| 01:05:38.50 | Max Shank | Lizard Brain versus the Wizard Brain. We talked about how compassion is best found when you understand that everyone's doing the best they can based on how they think and feel at the time including yourself so you can forgive and accept yourself including all of your past decisions that. Retroactively you might label as mistakes I Just think ah. |
| 01:05:59.40 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, we call ah and and the courses I teach I call that honoring self and honoring other honor yourself and and give yourself some grace and give yourself what you need in the moment so that you can show up the best you can possibly be honoring other is ah. |
| 01:06:05.77 | Max Shank | Oh that's nice. |
| 01:06:19.90 | mikebledsoe | Not assuming that you know what's actually happening in their experience and and and understanding they are doing. You know that they're probably doing their best and so you've got to give them the benefit of a doubt and when that happens it opens up communication to find out. Ah, to get to get more accuracy about what is their experience and usually once that door opens the understanding is a lot easier to come by. |
| 01:06:47.64 | Max Shank | Man That's good. It kind of reminds me of something else which is wisdom is knowing yourself and acting accordingly and arrogance is thinking. You know what's best for other people. |
| 01:07:01.74 | mikebledsoe | Simple, very simple. Ah and I like that like that a lot anything else I'm feeling I'm feeling complete this is ah. |
| 01:07:04.10 | Max Shank | Simple. |
| 01:07:12.52 | Max Shank | This was a lot of fun I'm feeling complete you complete me. Ah. |
| 01:07:21.45 | mikebledsoe | Ah, ah, feeling complete. Yeah, we didn't have a we didn't have like a target to hit at the end of the show so going going off a feeling here. |
| 01:07:28.19 | Max Shank | I I What are you talking about? what are you talking about? we spent an hour. We hit so many valuable points for how to make better choices. Are you kidding me. |
| 01:07:36.19 | mikebledsoe | I agree I agree but I usually have in my head this this final target. We're gonna land on. He's like where well it's we. |
| 01:07:44.43 | Max Shank | What do you want me to say what do you want me to say. |
| 01:07:49.28 | mikebledsoe | We didn't plan it so there's no way to know it's that's I'm saying I have to go off a feeling at this point, there's no predetermined target. |
| 01:07:54.73 | Max Shank | Um, I don't even I don't even know how we would come up with a target for the choice making podcast. |
| 01:08:03.26 | mikebledsoe | I Know that's that's that's why we're here we we have to just choose in the moment. |
| 01:08:08.82 | Max Shank | All right? Well you got so I'm I'm really noticing our mistake in our pre-show planning here so in order for you to feel fulfilled in order for me to satisfy you I need to know what you hope to achieve at the end of each podcast. So next week be sure to let me know exactly what you would like me to do for you by the end. |
| 01:08:29.35 | mikebledsoe | Ah, he ah perfect. |
| 01:08:35.10 | Max Shank | Um, ah ah you can find me at mashank dot com. How can they find you. |
| 01:08:39.39 | mikebledsoe | All right? Where yeah we're besides that Youtube video where can people find you. |
| 01:08:48.60 | mikebledsoe | Ah, on Instagram mike underscore bletzo and a reminder that I have the strong coach summit coming up in March the strongcoach dot com slash summit will get you more information. |
| 01:09:01.58 | Max Shank | Boom. Thank you guys for listening. Love you. Mikey. |
| 01:09:05.42 | mikebledsoe | Let me max. |
| 00:00.00 | Max Shank | Ladies and gentlemen welcome back to Monday morning with max and mike today I'm very excited because we are going to talk about how to be your own scientist. This is a subject very near and dear to my heart because unfortunately there are. No shortcuts. It would be so nice if we could just all be told what exercises to do and what foods to eat at what time but we are unique individuals and there's no way that you're going to put a broad. General piece of advice that works for everybody. You cannot apply the same solution to everyone so that is why you must take responsibility to be your own scientist and today we're going to talk about that mike nice to see you again. |
| 00:53.66 | mikebledsoe | Good to see you max. And yeah, I'm excited about this topic because um, I'm somebody who's very comfortable experimenting on myself I know you are as well and so. A lot of times when I look around at the world and people are confused about something. It's it's hard for me to understand why they're confused I go well why don't you just try it out and then find out if it works for you or not in the way you want it to work and yet people are still waiting for there to be. A mountain of evidence or their favorite journalist to make an article about a single study that's going to convince them that this is the way to move forward and 1 thing I want to mention is you know we we're doing this because we. Well I'm doing this because I want to warn people of the dangers of going with the flow of the rest of society and if we're going to take a really broad view of ah science I mean science is really about discovery. Um, people are looking for things that are true. Ah and truth hides in plain sight as results and so ah, most scientific inquiry isolates and really goes deep into a single thing. But if you want to zoom out and you want to use the scientific lens to just say what are the results that exist in the world today then you would get that you may not find out everything that contributed to creating those results but you could at least be present with the results and that's 1 of the things that i. I see is missing in our society is just this this lack of acknowledgement of what is so ah I won't say science is failing because science is just a tool It's what we use but I I think as a society we're failing. Because even though we supposedly have the most advanced advanced science on the planet. At this point we have the most widespread obesity diabetes mental health challenges everything that science claims to have answers for and ah. Science doesn't claim anything because it's not a person but people like to claim that they represent science and then and then make bold claims for everybody. It's a really sad state because what we see is the the general result is mainstream understanding. |
| 03:38.60 | mikebledsoe | Ah, and you don't want to go with that if you want to be average look at the average they're they're sick and almost dead. Ah then go for it. But if you don't want to be average. You have to be your own scientist. |
| 03:51.90 | Max Shank | Well I generally agree with what you're saying I think it's important to define our terminology a little bit and there are 2 things that really stuck out to me there number 1 is you either mean science as a field. Like there are the sciences. There are physical sciences, social sciences and actually that's the main problem that we're in. So if you remember anything about this first bit. It's that our physical sciences have advanced astronomically literally astronomically. But our social sciences are retarded in in the most literal sense of the word, our social science progress is in the basement that progress has been slowed down or retarded when. You think of science what you probably are referring to is the scientific method which involves number 1 observing what's going on around you to a hypothesis which is basically a guess so all science starts with paying attention. And then guessing and then you run an experiment and you record the results and that's the scientific Method. It's supposed to inform you based on a repeatable experiment when unfortunately right now right. The word science is used more like a political tool or a persuasive tool just the same way if some guy is in a long white lab coat. You are maybe more likely to believe what he's going to say so it's important that we don't conflate or. As mike says the collapse distinction between the science and the scientific method. And yeah. |
| 05:43.87 | mikebledsoe | Well I think yeah Science I think using the word scientific field is good because that refers to a group of people who may identify as scientists and then they they collaborate in some way but because it's a organization or or ah, a. There's a large large organization. There's subsets of organizations and some are recognized more widely than others but the scientific field is wrought with ah policy so inside there there is um. Policy is driving so much of what what research is being conducted. What research is published. There's There's all these things ah science that there is not a there is a governor that is being put on science by policy and So. Ah, the the it's fueled by dollars. But but the reason we have an I R B We have a ah ah review board is to make sure that we're not inhumanely experimenting on people or or something like that. But that same review board. |
| 06:40.72 | Max Shank | Well, it's fueled by dollars right? I mean just like anything else. There's an incentive. |
| 06:55.26 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 07:00.27 | mikebledsoe | On The flip side may also limit ah research that a lot of times limits new research because if you want to if you want to jump into something that's too far of a gap between what's already being studied. Then a lot of times that won't get moved forward. |
| 07:18.81 | Max Shank | Yeah, and you don't have to only think of what are traditionally scientific fields like physics and chemistry and computer technology. In fact, 1 of the. Best books I've ever read is called scientific advertising and he approaches advertising in a very methodical and scientific way using the scientific method hence the name. So I think 1 of the things that we're talking about today is applying that scientific method. To as many parts of your own life as possible and it doesn't need to be such a heavy word either. It really comes down to paying attention and reviewing what the results actually were for you right. |
| 08:06.79 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I I was at a talk this past weekend I went to and a conference and first conference I've been to in a couple years it was it was a lot of fun. Ah, but what we got talking about was the well. What. 1 woman. She gave a presentation about how to how women need to be experimenting on themselves because the majority of research that's been conducted has been on men and then not only that ah the fda up until ninety ninety 3 made it they they. Made it where there was going to be no clinical studies on women who ah were pregnant or had who had gotten pregnant during any of the research trials and so it's basically illegal to conduct clinical research on pregnant women and then. Because women could get pregnant. No 1 wanted to do research on women because they could just lose all their subjects and I've been a part of of studies before research studies and just getting the subjects for your study are is difficult enough. So the majority of that's been done for men and so. |
| 09:21.12 | Max Shank | 1 with women. The hormone fluctuations can be so dramatic throughout a month due to the natural cycle that they have to throw that data out anyway. |
| 09:23.20 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 09:32.15 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's a 28 day cycle whereas men have a 24 hour cycle. Um, and there there is variation over I think a seventy 2 hour day period for men but it's so small by comparison. Um, so man, why was I getting into that. |
| 09:46.59 | Max Shank | Um, for me. |
| 09:52.30 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 09:52.31 | Max Shank | How how they make the measurements how they do the scientific studies difference between men and women. |
| 09:58.41 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, there was somewhere I was going with that and I I lost it. It'll come back. |
| 10:06.70 | Max Shank | I think we can kind of segue though into the ability to decipher. What's going on in these scientific studies I think the number 1 thing with any new piece of information. Absolutely number 1 thing doesn't matter if it's an article, a new story scientific study. You got to look at the incentive is who is to gain the most from this bit of information and unfortunately. You can prove almost anything with statistics. In fact, 1 of my favorite quotes is a mark twain quote you have lies damn lies and statistics and oftentimes you can set up the study itself. To prove exactly what you want to prove like I could easily prove that leg presses are better than squats or vice versa depending on what I decided to measure so it's very interesting to look at the way that people use. Scientific studies to back up their argument and it makes sense because as far as persuasion is concerned. It is 1 of the best things 1 of the best ways to persuade is to say this is proven to work and that's actually the main reason why most people aren't willing. To take a scientific approach to their life. They want to outsource that science to somebody else because if I say hey mike you know I got this? Ah great exercise plan. there's ah there's a good chance. It's not going to work for you. But by the end of it. We might have an idea what will work for you versus. If I say mike I have this scientifically proven plan if you just follow it. You are guaranteed results because you know sixty percent of other people got results. But. |
| 12:02.87 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think I think a lot of people don't don't are not friendly. Experimenting on themselves because of their association. Well, there's no guarantee but there's no so there's an association with not getting the desired result. |
| 12:12.43 | Max Shank | There's no guarantee. |
| 12:21.90 | mikebledsoe | With failure instead of really being able to view it as a test I don't think that yeah that people are people our our culture has been raised and educated in a fashion that makes ah not getting the desired result. |
| 12:25.33 | Max Shank | It's the fomo. |
| 12:38.14 | mikebledsoe | And it makes you a bad person like there's there's this, there's this association with that and they don't know what we do is We have a whole culture of people who don't know how to test what works for them because they don't It's It's so much safer to go with the mainstream I mean. Ah. |
| 12:39.52 | Max Shank | He failed. |
| 12:57.40 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean who yeah, it's safer just to be the average kid in the classroom. Yeah, you'll fit in. |
| 13:01.39 | Max Shank | What you'll fit in right? It's fascinating because most of the study and I'm just going to use like exercise and nutrition as examples most of the time you can easily prove that 1 thing is better than another thing. But it's so so difficult to prove with any kind of randomized control study that something is better than many other things so you end up with these studies that are very um, we'll just call it like tunnel vision. For lack of a better word right? So it's like we have proven that squats are better than leg presses and I'm I'm sure we could pull several of our friends. On this podcast and they would conclusively be like yeah dude squats are way better than Leg presses I mean this has been put to bed and I'm like for who though and over what period of time because it's so difficult to get participants to do something for a long period of time. Usually these studies are like. 12 weeks at the longest. It's really difficult to figure out what's going to be overall best for strength and longevity and plus as you and I both know a lot of the strength gains come after years and years not after just a few weeks so there are so many considerations here that it should inform your experiment but you should not believe that it is going to provide you with the same result because in fact, no matter what the odds are. It's still pretty much going to be a coin flip about whether squats or leg presses are going to be better for you as an individual because there are 2 outcomes that it could be either. Squats will be better for you or leg presses or a combination of each right? but we can't test that because it makes the research too complicated. So you might have a person who would be way better off doing leg presses but the study showed that only like ten percent of people do better with leg presses. You follow what I'm saying here and then. |
| 15:18.89 | mikebledsoe | Me. |
| 15:22.95 | Max Shank | Of course this doesn't take into consideration at all that sled pushes and lunges might have been better than both squats and leg presses. So you end up getting tunnel vision because now you have put your belief. You've put your faith into this study. So now you may plug away because. I I believe this the scientists are correct. They obviously have no incentive other than informing me of what is true. So now you are going to be because you're going to stop looking now, you're going to stop doing your due diligence and the same thing is true with nutrition. Because peanuts are either a protein packed health food or instant death depending on the severity of your peanut allergy so you have to do your own experiment because the same thing is true with with any substance and we haven't even gotten into the less. Tangible things that are more qualitative like what exercise do you enjoy doing like the reality is if even if Backsquats are better than tennis I'm I'm just not going to do years and years of back squats like I don't care I find it boring i. |
| 16:39.63 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, go ahead? yeah. |
| 16:39.86 | Max Shank | Don't want to do it and I'm a pretty motivated guy so you gotta look at you gotta look at what will work practically for you rather than trying to be more absolutist about which is better than what because it's gonna be different for you. As an individual so there's no way to get around it unless you're willing to accept a worse result for yourself. |
| 17:05.14 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the something you said that really stuck out to me is talking about Tunnel vision. Um, that happens another other thing that contributes to tunnel vision in regard to research 3 things I want to cover is ah. And meanalysis outliers in isolation and so ah, when research is being conducted when a single study is being conducted. Ah if there's an outlier someone who falls. Ah so far enough outside of the bell curve. They just cut them out of study altogether like it just aren't even there and so ah and it will not make it into the published study. It's not even acknowledged how many people may have been cut due to being an outlier. Um. |
| 17:43.82 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 17:59.89 | mikebledsoe | And it's really up to the scientist who's conducting the study which as we know humans you know tend to be biased and by by many different things and so 1 is we must be aware of the outliers and you you got to understand that you may be the outlier. |
| 18:17.70 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, peanut might kill you. |
| 18:19.51 | mikebledsoe | So peanut might kill you might make a hundred other people stronger it'll you'll die. Um, the other 1 is the other thing I want to talk about was well isolation science is really good at isolating something but as you were talking about. |
| 18:23.26 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 18:37.66 | mikebledsoe | You're going to be able to find a study that compares back squats to leg press. But you're not going to find a study that compares back squats to leg press which the when the back squat was combined with the lunges and the leg press was combined with the sled push and. |
| 18:53.24 | Max Shank | Can't control that many variables possible. |
| 18:54.77 | mikebledsoe | Too many variables. So like the whole point of this like the scientific method by its design because it was designed by human beings by its design is really good at isolating incredibly good isolating and this is something I I really want people to understand. Is if you want to isolate. It's it's the best. But if you want to integrate it you you have to start making a lot of guesses and this is where the the N equals 1 comes in the the self experimentation because ah, you. You're the only 1 that's going to log that much care and time and into the research of yourself I mean what max was saying too the majority of studies are only 12 weeks long because it it gets really expensive for 1 to to be able to pay people and. You know that just whatever it just gets expensive energy wise time wise and then yeah who's you know? and so now if you want a longer term Study. You're gonna have to have a lot more money. Um. |
| 19:52.83 | Max Shank | And that's where the incentives come into play too where who's funding that study. |
| 20:02.89 | Max Shank | How many people how many people out there just have free cash and are like let's honestly just see what happens with it I don't I don't care if it disproves my strong incentive. It's so rare for that to happen. It's almost never going to happen. |
| 20:16.58 | mikebledsoe | So yeah, no, No so ah, it's yeah, incredibly good at ah yeah, the the the isolation I mean Also yeah is. Is. It's a small window in time twelve weeks if we talk about just fitness because that's all the research that I was involved with was all fitness based and I it became obvious to me that it was such a short period of time. How are we really getting the results. We're looking for. Um, and. |
| 20:51.48 | Max Shank | It should only inform your guess it should only inform your hypothesis for what you do yourself and there's a huge difference between the scientific method in terms of ah, proving that. Electricity and magnetism are the same Force. You know the the stuff that we the science that is done to build a telephone that can wirelessly transmit video in real time is very different than the. I I don't even like to call it science that we do for ah random control trials because these trials end up having to be interpreted in statistics and that's where you can very easily. Fabricate a different reality than what is going on So There's a really big difference between doing the experimental science where it is repeatable to the point where you get the same result every single time you know like buoyancy is so clearly Measurable. Electric Force Magnetic Force electromagnet. That's so measurable and so repeatable and so consistent. But this whole idea of getting a big group and then being able to very easily manipulate statistics to your advantage I mean that's. That's like pseudoscience to me and I'm sure a lot of people would really hate to hear me say that but it's so easy to manipulate statistics under the guise that you have done good science. |
| 22:35.86 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, so I want to differentiate something here. Um, and that is a single study versus a metaanalysis and so ah the when I when I was in school I went through ah a scientific methods class. |
| 22:45.58 | Max Shank | This. |
| 22:55.36 | mikebledsoe | Um, and between that class and another class I had in grad school I I created 2 lit reviews and which was which is basically ah a metaanalysis and that is I looked at over 1 ah hundred studies on a specific subject and then. I basically told a story about what it means. That's what ah, that's what that is and so something very interesting happened is well once I got into the studies themselves I realized it really became apparent that. |
| 23:16.64 | Max Shank | 1 and then i. |
| 23:31.90 | mikebledsoe | Finding consistency between studies was not as easy as I would have liked to have been um and then ah I conducted I conducted the analysis. I wrote the lit review and in 1 of my classes someone did a lit review on the same exact thing ah on the same exact topic and I'm telling you what I put some time into this some effort I was I was. Honest about it I wanted to impress my classmates I wanted to impress my professor I wanted to do it right? and I bet you the other guy did too the results incredibly different, incredibly different on what we've. Our suggestions on how this research should be applied between the 2 of us there's over 200 and fifty different studies that were cited and we came up with different meaning because that's what we that's it's it's sense making of. |
| 24:29.88 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 24:36.50 | Max Shank | Um, did you meta did you me analyze the same studies. Ah, that's the 1 interesting thing about meta-analysis because you can say we we evaluated. |
| 24:40.47 | mikebledsoe | Ah, no, no, but it was the same. |
| 24:51.90 | Max Shank | 3 hundred studies and they all proved the same thing meanwhile there are 7 hundred other studies that they just didn't evaluate that proved the exact opposite thing. |
| 24:56.91 | mikebledsoe | Well well that was that was the thing is I I was under time constraints. You know we're doing this in a single semester I found over 1000 studies I could have referenced but I just couldn't I just don't have the time to do that and that also happens in science. It. |
| 25:04.50 | Max Shank | Murder. |
| 25:14.38 | Max Shank | What are you a slow reader or something you can't read a thousand studies like you don't care about the results man. |
| 25:16.54 | mikebledsoe | And what. Ah, well and here's the thing is it's cherry pick and it's always cherry picked and whether it's an intentional cherry picking based on Bias or it's cherry picking based on just saying I think this is the best ones to choose from because we have a. |
| 25:26.67 | Max Shank | Of course. |
| 25:37.59 | mikebledsoe | Have a specific limitation which life is limitation and so that's not going away maybe with quantum computing that could that could change. Ah so I I really like that that really highlighted to me is when I when I started looking at the studies and then. Not only that the studies that I chose something that I learned during that process were studies and of course I believe my shit was more accurate but the studies that I end up choosing had methods used that I felt were applicable to. Athletes and so I wasn't just randomly selecting studies I was like look if I'm gonna be looking at weight lifters I'm not going to be looking at a leg press I'm gonna be looking at a squat instead. So um, so that's that's another thing that really got highlighted to me was. |
| 26:26.96 | Max Shank | Right? um. |
| 26:36.75 | mikebledsoe | Ah, the methods matter and most people only read the summary they may read the abstract which is the explanation of the the big picture paragraph about you know how we're conducting this study and all that and then there's the summary. Most people read The. The abstracting summary and they probably don't even read all of that and then they come up with some type of conclusion and so huh it is hard. It's hard I mean it's it's not is it. |
| 26:59.63 | Max Shank | To be fair, it is really hard. It's really hard like I've I've gone down I've gone down that rabbit hole man reading those studies is so difficult like I I want to poke my eyeballs out. |
| 27:13.68 | mikebledsoe | So yeah I probably read yeah I've read over yeah I read over 1000 I I know I've read at least a thousand and and yeah, it's I have no interest in. |
| 27:18.88 | Max Shank | With a fork by the time I've read like 10 of them. It's like ridiculous. |
| 27:30.81 | mikebledsoe | I don't I don't enjoy it but I still have to look at research at times because I go I gotta know I gotta know but what I what I realized is ah in inside of that I started I started paying attention to when Journalists would write an article about. |
| 27:35.35 | Max Shank | It's horrible. It's horrible. Yeah. |
| 27:50.48 | mikebledsoe | Ah study and that it it was it was after that class and I remember reading. Ah you know the eggs were bad for you in the New York times. Yeah, and but I read it and I go I go. |
| 27:50.17 | Max Shank | Oh god. |
| 27:59.29 | Max Shank | Oh no, not this again. |
| 28:07.60 | mikebledsoe | I'm probably the only person on the planet's going to click the citation and look at the actual study and I remember clicking the study and reading it and going. Wow these people really we got I got back down to the isolation thing which is. Ah, you know?? Ah, they weren't even talking about nutrition in the study they were just talking about they were testing something else and it is ah it was a huge extrapolation ah in order There was this huge gap in logic that needed to be crossed. |
| 28:37.80 | Max Shank | Oh it's crazy. |
| 28:45.25 | mikebledsoe | In order to come up with a summary because the scientists do this. The fucking scientists will they'll have a solid everything and then they get it a summary and I read the summary and I and I go I don't even know I'm not I'm reading it I'm going I can tell this scientist is Biased. So so we got this. So we we look at this is how how's it like to your point how is it funded. What are the other biases that might be with the scientists we've seen this a lot with like plant-based diet advocate science scientists. Ah. |
| 29:04.48 | Max Shank | I think. |
| 29:22.28 | mikebledsoe | How many what other biases might they have then they which may influence what data they include in the study and what they don't then not only that all they gotta do no matter what the study actually shows what they put in their summary is probably gonna get. The the most amount of attention and then you go from a scientist with biases that then makes it to a journalist who knows squat about they don't know shit about science or the scientific method and then they write an article based on their bias and so there's this. |
| 29:57.74 | Max Shank | It's all cuts the C word I think we know no ah it's the now causation and correlation I think that is the big leap. |
| 30:00.14 | mikebledsoe | What's the C word. |
| 30:04.76 | mikebledsoe | I. You know. |
| 30:13.64 | Max Shank | That's the biggest leap I see in these ah these I'll tell you these guys are real jerks ah who confuse correlation with causation because that is such an unreal difference. Between correlation and causation because even something like cigarettes and I I don't smoke cigarettes I smoked 1 menthilated one half of 1 menthilated cigarette in my whole life and it was okay and I wasn't like dying to do more of it. But this whole idea. Like when you really like dig into it. Cigarette smoking is just correlated with death from like cancer heart disease and things like that they haven't actually proven that it causes it and the difference between causation and correlation is so freaking. Huge. Because you look at something like cigarette smoking people who smoke cigarettes are less likely to exercise cardiovascularly they're more likely to make poor food choices. They're more likely to overeat they're more likely to be stressed out. There are all these I don't know if that last 1 is actually true. |
| 31:16.90 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 31:28.43 | mikebledsoe | It take any more sugar I imagine I mean just you said poor diet but I mean sugar is a huge inflammatory. |
| 31:29.28 | Max Shank | I take that 1 back. |
| 31:35.67 | Max Shank | Right? So what I'm saying is it's that leap from correlation to causation is like 1 of the most evil things that is done because you like you said you might have a perfectly legitimate study beforehand and then they're like. Coming out with this article that says Salt kills ten percent of americans I'm like or ten percent are you that was an actual article by the way Salt kills ten percent of americans meanwhile you go to Korea they have like triple the salt consumption and way less death. So how do you harmonize. Those 2 inequalities right? So that I think that's a big ah key point correlation versus causation. |
| 32:21.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean I'm I'm gonna go ahead and put it out there because I know you know we we will dance around it but like the died with Covid versus died from Covid it. It's the the correlation. |
| 32:32.66 | Max Shank | I Know it's horrifying. |
| 32:37.61 | mikebledsoe | The correlation is spelled out in the like title of the report and is ah people are people are believing that it's causing it and so someone's yes, right. |
| 32:44.54 | Max Shank | Whoa. |
| 32:49.79 | Max Shank | But that doesn't help with the death counter that doesn't help with the huge death counter in the side corner. |
| 32:56.66 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the depth that yeah, it's It's not as sensational I know but ah well and here's the thing is lot anytime I I bring this up with certain people and they have just tried to fire hos me with all sorts of shit after that I'm like look look I'm just saying it's it's I'm not lying like I'm not making this up I'm just saying. This is the actual report and this is what they've been saying on even on the news like like but then they go Yeah, but it's caused I'm like no no, no, no, no with not from and it's um, and then the politicians picked it up now if you're a scientist who's studying this shit. |
| 33:19.67 | Max Shank | Ah, it's insane. |
| 33:32.63 | Max Shank | Oh god. |
| 33:35.83 | mikebledsoe | If you're a scientist that's studying this and you're getting paid to study. It would do you think maybe you would have a bias. What do you think? what do you think? what do you? which scientists think do you think are getting paid the best right now. |
| 33:44.41 | Max Shank | We all do man. |
| 33:52.40 | Max Shank | But probably the ones reminding people to drink enough water and get sunshine. It's highly highly Monetizable Strategy hey you know all that stuff that's free that you don't do start doing it again by the way that'll be zero dollars. |
| 34:00.20 | mikebledsoe | I. |
| 34:10.65 | mikebledsoe | Ah, here. |
| 34:10.21 | Max Shank | Like what it's ah no, it's It's totally insane. Um that that has been allowed to happen and like I I could talk about this I I mean we all are right? um. |
| 34:19.46 | mikebledsoe | Well who's allowing it to happen. Yeah, it's this is this is the general population it. It is because because they're not trying to hide it. They're saying died with and and yet the average the average person is just not educated well enough. |
| 34:28.87 | Max Shank | The the now. Well if if science if the science that you're doing or the scientific method that you're doing is ah dependent. |
| 34:38.96 | mikebledsoe | Think that's part of it. |
| 34:46.13 | Max Shank | On Inflammatory rhetoric and like a constant bombardment of propaganda you should probably go back to your fucking research phase and do a different experiment because it's not ah, it's not really working and actually I think that. Ah. |
| 34:50.10 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 35:04.10 | Max Shank | I heard 1 of the most ridiculous phrases I've ever heard in my life in the last little bit of history which is ah trust science or even trust the science now that is ridiculous because that only means ah well 2 things is funny about that. Number 1 that means trust the scientists who are talking right? It doesn't have anything to do with trust the science because you would have to be trusting the result of the experiment and you would have to understand that experiment to be able to do that and the second funny thing is um. The whole reason we do science is because we don't trust the whole purpose of science is to verify like it's the most meaningless ridiculous rhetorical phrase I've ever heard in my life has no bearing in reality whatsoever and you hear um, stupid people parroting it back. |
| 35:46.30 | mikebledsoe | You know. |
| 36:01.55 | Max Shank | Like they know what the fuck is going on. It's because no 1 wants to just say you know what? Ah gosh I don't really know and it it makes sense because we want to stay part of the tribe and we don't want to seem stupid right? So it's like. |
| 36:16.27 | mikebledsoe | You know so. |
| 36:20.42 | Max Shank | No, no, no, not yeah I trust that what what are you anti-science anti-vaccine and of course those are broad generalizations that it has to do a little bit with attention inflation like we talked about a little bit before how. If I say there's an imminent hurricane. That's a more exciting weather story then it's going to be sunny today and you'll probably click on the like imminent hurricane. So it's this race for the most outrageous deadly stuff but the same thing is true in America we're talking about right. The same thing is true in America that was true before is the biggest threat to your health is yourself like if you look at all the ways that people die um suicide beats murder like 4 to 1 maybe even 5 or 8 to 1 now. It's ridiculous like we kill ourselves way more than each other directly. With like ah, a bath with the toaster or whatever and not only that all of the ways that people die. It's like so ridiculous to like to fight heart disease like how are you going to fucking fight heart disease like who are you going to punch like it's ridiculous The whole thing is like fighting sickness isn't the same as promoting health and all of these things like we're gonna battle Diabetes. We're gonna battle heart disease and it's like no dude that person has been killing themselves for 20 years by eating shitty food not exercising. Not expressing themselves authentically not having a close group of friends that promotes that sort of healthy active behavior like it's not fucking rocket surgery here. It's no ah, it's no surprise that people are dying a little prematurely but we get so. Honed in on these ways that people die kind of like where you're taught we like to isolate. We're like we got to fight hard to so then you know suddenly the egg with cholesterol is like going to kill you the egg that's be afraid of eggs of all the things to be afraid of you should be. Terrified of the damage that you are doing to yourself not of a fucking egg. |
| 38:38.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well you know fighting a war on something is super super popular and was that okay we got out so far all right? so that what there used to be a war. Well well we used to have a war. We used to. |
| 38:43.79 | Max Shank | Even profitable Also Profitable war on drugs I think that's ah we lost. |
| 38:54.90 | mikebledsoe | Have Wars with other countries. It was like Kings we're having Wars with other kings and then it was it was countries were having Wars with each other and then ah yeah, and then and then we had to get really creative and start having Wars on ideas like the concept of drugs the concept of. Terrorism The constant is like like you can just ah fucking you can attack anybody at that point if you convince people that that we're fighting a war on terrorism all got do is say that there are terrorists. We're gonna fight the war on Covid we're going to that makes you might be an enemy if you get put into the Anti-vaxer ah category. Ah you. |
| 39:36.59 | Max Shank | Um, isn't the war on terror hilarious. What's scarier than that the war on terror is fucking terrifying. There's there's no greater terrorist organization than the media. No 1 has terrorized more people than the media. |
| 39:43.49 | mikebledsoe | Um, well the problem a problem with no greater. |
| 39:54.15 | Max Shank | They scare people into promoting a war. We should not be in they scare people into being like oh yeah, you better frisk my asshole before I get on the airplane like Jesus there's nothing scarier than like the constant but like the war on terror is such an epic failure. The war on drugs. |
| 40:04.79 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 40:12.45 | Max Shank | Such an epic failure I mean there are real actual problems in the world and we're like hey are you are you smoking grass. Well let's put you in prison for that like the war on. Are you kidding me? Meanwhile we're going to sell trillions of dollars in opiates. |
| 40:25.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 40:32.39 | Max Shank | Because you know the way that we practice medicine here isn't that we talk to you about a more active lifestyle or um, you know, physical therapy type exercise maybe putting your feet in the dirt. We're just going to drug you like of course like there's no There's no money in it. That's why you got to fall on the incentive like you know all of this gets erased by a simple phrase which is buyer beware and the truth is there are people who are going to swindle you. There are people who call up an old lady at home and they're like ah you're. Daughter needs a thousand dollars to get bailed out of Mexico you better wire it right away and you know what the lady does it. There are people out there to swindle you on the low level and there's a great big swindle at the upper levels too. So it's your responsibility as a consumer. To decide what you believe like it's no, it's no surprise that buy and believe are synonyms like if someone tells you a story that you don't believe you say I don't buy it so that's that's the whole thing is like it's up to you to decide what story you're going to put faith into. And quite frankly, you're better off believing basically nothing you hear and just being a little bit more of a scientist yourself to see what the results actually are and I know that's harder it is harder. You get a better result, but it is harder. |
| 42:04.57 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, there's ah, there's also I mean this this brings me back I'm I'm going to rewind a little bit here but the we've talked about the victim villain Hero the Drama Triangle and people. |
| 42:06.92 | Max Shank | Also watch out for eggs. |
| 42:19.90 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 42:24.27 | mikebledsoe | People want there to be something to demonize something to villainize something to vilify so that yeah and so I mean ah you know Covid's the enemy. So now the scientists are the heroes. |
| 42:29.50 | Max Shank | So they can be the hero. |
| 42:39.29 | Max Shank | Um, I'm the Hero eggs are the enemy also Salt but my breakfast is just out to get me. |
| 42:42.25 | mikebledsoe | And ah, eggs are the enemy. Yeah yeah, so whoever figured that out. Um, yeah, eggs and bacon I'm fucked man and ah constant barrage. Ah yeah, but it's it's interesting that these Wars went from ah these countries fighting each other which is really just governments in disagreement. |
| 42:53.76 | Max Shank | Um, ah. |
| 43:10.48 | mikebledsoe | Convincing the population to go fight for them. Ah, and I was 1 of the suckers. So I'll be the first raised my hand and ah and then we go from like ah yeah, the war on drugs the war on poverty. Ah that that fucking I think this. |
| 43:16.60 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 43:25.23 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 43:29.98 | mikebledsoe | People in San francisco been fighting the war on poverty harder than anybody they've got more money doing and yes, they they got the worst homeless population. Ah we haven't won a war in a while. It's been a. |
| 43:33.00 | Max Shank | Um, when was the last war we won I don't think we've ever like won ah won 1 of those wars with the like a nebulous enemy like poverty is kind of a nebulous enemy. |
| 43:48.20 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's not. It's not really the the last the last thing the last time we had a war with anything was what and they didn't we didn't say it was a war on this person because it would be against geneva convention rules. |
| 43:51.85 | Max Shank | Like how would we even know that we won how would we even know that we won. |
| 44:07.10 | mikebledsoe | But the United states waged war against osama bin laden and it was the first time in history that a country waged war on 1 person and they called it terrorism because they wanted to make it look a lot bigger than it was because they had a hard time getting him. So. The are. |
| 44:25.52 | Max Shank | that's um That's amazing that's like I'm not a I'm not pro-terrorism from anyone but but if you have like a whole country you wage war on you. That's like remember grand theft auto. When you would get like five five stars five cop level at at you you know I'm talking about you know that game having it was it was just like an increasing amount like if you just like. |
| 44:46.25 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, Matt not actually I didn't play that much I know what the game is though. |
| 44:56.75 | Max Shank | I don't know punch a hooker or something and get like a half a star and the police are kind of looking out for you and then if you like Rocket launcher a helicopter or something you get like a lot of so you get like 5 star. So that's when you got like the whole swat team coming after you I played this game like 5 times but this is all I remembered I just wanted to get as much havoc as possible. |
| 44:59.90 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 45:16.30 | Max Shank | If you're 1 guy and you have a whole country declare war on you. You know you've done something to get their attention. |
| 45:22.47 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and it's and it's curious I won't go into it. But if you if you look into someone Bin. Laden's history it's ah there it's it's a ah, if you want to go down and wrap a hole go look that shit up. That's all I'll say um, but it's interesting. |
| 45:38.82 | Max Shank | Well revisionist history is like a good ah like talking point for this because um, the biggest consistency in history is that it's been very carefully selected lies to get people to Believe. A very carefully selected story I mean the losers don't get to write a history book really and look I only I'm a huge ah fan of. |
| 46:06.57 | mikebledsoe | They're dead. |
| 46:16.20 | Max Shank | North korea and history not North korea exactly but the history of North korea is very interesting just to clarify I'm not like ah but anyway the guy kim ilsung who started. |
| 46:25.00 | mikebledsoe | Um, dude I heard it's popular to be a communist right now I think we get more listeners just just claim it. |
| 46:30.90 | Max Shank | Finally I can be popular. It's what I've always been looking for oh god no but what I found out is okay so there are 2 great stories. There are many more but my 2 favorite are the ones where Kim il-sung goes to war with like. Ah, usa and south korea and gets like 85 percent of the buildings are destroyed like some crazy percentage of the population is killed and he has the testicles to come back address his people. And say everybody we won that was what he said he he just he got held a catastrophic loss. He just went back and told everybody that we won and we're gonna we're gonna get revenge on the american terrorists. Basically. |
| 47:24.12 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 47:26.59 | Max Shank | Then I found out he had a huge like mass I think it was like a benign tumor on the back of his neck but you never see it because every single picture of him is from a certain angle so you can't see it so it's so easy to hide something if you are the 1 who's. |
| 47:29.82 | mikebledsoe | And. |
| 47:37.65 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 47:45.26 | Max Shank | Selecting how history gets portrayed and look believe whatever you want I guess but like look at the war on people's minds over the last 2 years I mean it's crazy I've never seen anything like it I think more people. Have been snapped into reality which is probably why people feel very jaded about the media because like how many times does someone need to lie to you before you're just like you know what? I don't I don't trust that guy anymore like if you were in a relationship. And your girlfriend lied to you every day for years and years would you keep believing what she said I don't think so. |
| 48:27.74 | mikebledsoe | No I think it's interesting that we we started off talking about being your own scientist Now we're often to politics but it makes very it makes a lot of sense and it it. It's all it's all correlated. Ah because because you can't. |
| 48:41.78 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 48:46.32 | mikebledsoe | The the problem with the way that people are interpreting science now is through the lens of policy and politics and so it has to be addressed now I want to bring it back to how do we be our own scientist. How do we? How do we. Do these experiments for ourselves. How do we make choices. Maybe somebody's only done things that have been that they've outsourced to their doctor or they've outsourced ah took you know whoever about their life and what how they should live it and they want to start experimenting. What are some of the ways that you have you experiment for yourself. Max. |
| 49:26.78 | Max Shank | Fast fasting is a really good place to start because then you are bringing a little bit of honesty into the equation and then reintroducing foods after a fast can be very illuminating because you can be aware of how they affect you personally. I think that's 1 of the best ways to do it I think having um, an exercise plan that you follow through with is another really good way to do that and there are a couple sayings like what is measured is improved I've heard. |
| 50:02.74 | mikebledsoe | What what gets measured gets managed. Where's ah fuck singing. Ah yeah, sometimes what you can measure is not the most important thing so you got to keep keep that in you got to keep that. |
| 50:03.49 | Max Shank | Saying before I can't remember who said it there you go maybe that's the 1 I'm thinking of. |
| 50:17.46 | Max Shank | Well definitely not well that that reminds me of Goodhart's law which is as soon as a measure becomes a target. It's no longer a good measure. |
| 50:22.64 | mikebledsoe | And mind. |
| 50:30.53 | mikebledsoe | And that's that's happened a lot in regard to heart health. It's like it's like ah cholesterol is bad all right? What foods can you eat the lower cholesterol and then you know 20 years goes is by and they go. |
| 50:33.65 | Max Shank | And then what right right? what. |
| 50:49.70 | mikebledsoe | Well, it's not really the cholesterol. It's the inflammation but there's all this momentum running with cholesterol and it's like you pick up the box of cheerios and it says it lowers cholesterol and it's got a ah heart drawn on the box and ah. |
| 51:03.65 | Max Shank | That serial money can pay for a lot of scientists I'll tell you what. |
| 51:08.70 | mikebledsoe | Well yeah I mean the the ingredients are subsidized with tax Pi payers money. So why? not? That's why it's subsidized. Um. |
| 51:15.51 | Max Shank | It's also 1 of the cheapest foods you can possibly make I think the packaging is more expensive. Yeah yeah, it's absurd and here's the thing like you don't have to believe that these scientists are evil because no 1 thinks that they're evil. Everyone thinks they're the good guy in their story but just because their intentions may be good. Doesn't mean that the result can't really fuck you up, you know, like the. |
| 51:40.39 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, I Well here's the thing is scientists I know a lot of Ph Ds I know a decent amount of scientists and they they are very well versed in a very narrow field and some of them know it and some of them don't but. The the job going back to the job of the scientist is to isolate and to be a human being to live a fully optimized life. You need to Isolate. You need to integrate and then from there you can improvise. And no scientists are Improvising. It's not their.. It's not their strong suit. Their strong suit is to Isolate. It's up to you to integrate ah to to test and isolate variables. |
| 52:17.94 | Max Shank | Um, so. |
| 52:25.20 | Max Shank | You know. |
| 52:33.20 | mikebledsoe | And then see what you spec works in combination with your lifestyle integrate it into your lifestyle. This is why fasting is such a good idea is because it's It's a way to reduce variables. Um, and then you integrate it and you keep paying attention and then after you've integrated something far enough into your life then. You become like you start to improvise I see this with Ido partol talks about this when he's teaching movement. He says isolate integrate improvise and ah the idea is a lot of times people see a master improvising. And they try to copy the improvisation as and this happens with you know this happens in in everything that that's going on in our lives people try to improvise ah copy someone's Improvisation. It's in business or something and then it doesn't work for them and so. |
| 53:14.20 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 53:31.40 | mikebledsoe | It's ah it's something to remember is on on 1 side. You have people who are only look at integrate at ah isolation just acknowledge science and scientists for what they're doing. It's isolating practice integrating and then. Recognize the masters who are already improvising and recognize it as improvisation and then and then talk to them about how they did it and I think that's that's a ah key to maximizing your own potential. |
| 53:53.84 | Max Shank | The. I Think honest record keeping is probably the most important thing for for being your own scientist is honest record keeping. |
| 54:03.50 | mikebledsoe | Okay. Yeah, writing shit down is great because our memories tend to get very selective. There's a lot of research to support that I don't know where it's at right now but you know I think you should believe me. |
| 54:29.30 | Max Shank | It's very true I mean it's hard to determine causality or correlation as well and I'll give you a good example that I like which is have you ever heard of oil pulling. |
| 54:42.92 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah I do it? Yeah man I sometimes I'll do it every day for like a month or 2 and then it'll be like once a week on and off. |
| 54:45.99 | Max Shank | Gotta have heard of that you do oil pulling every day sometimes. |
| 54:54.23 | Max Shank | Okay, so you're a bad scientist that's fine. No big deal just I'm just kidding you. You seem a little triggered there. Ah no so here's the funny thing about oil pulling. |
| 55:00.33 | mikebledsoe | I've done it long enough frequent enough. Okay, okay, max come on not I don't get triggered I don't get triggered. |
| 55:13.39 | Max Shank | So you do it for like five minutes right throw some coconut oil in your mouth. Wish it around at least that's what I've heard 10 to 20 You're an animal that means you're twice as good as those five minute oil pullers at least twice as good. Oh it's compounding benefit. No kidding. |
| 55:18.10 | mikebledsoe | Do 10 to twenty minutes but okay at least at least? well it's compounding. So it's it's an exponential. Yeah. |
| 55:33.15 | Max Shank | Yeah wow little statistic right from out of the ass. Ah, here's what's funny about oil pulling because there are 2 things going on with oil pulling that could be potentially very good number 1 you are nose breathing only. And for the average person just breathing through your nose is like is like magic because breathing is the bridge between your conscious and subconscious. You go Boom sympath ah parasympathetic state unless you have a stuffy nose then you'll go sympathetic and you'll feel like you are drowning. But the cool thing about oil pulling is it's really impossible to figure out which of those is benefiting you the most. But here's the deal if your record keeping is good then it doesn't matter which is the benefit for you if it's the fact that you have oil in your mouth. Or the fact that your nose breathing for five minutes if that ritual helps you observe observably so you're in the right ballpark now if you're a hyper Nerd. You can take a step further and you can do ah a more controlled experiment. You could do ah 2 weeks with oil. And you could do 2 weeks just with your mouth closed for that long or you could do water and so that would be a way that you could get a little bit more clarity on which of those things is beneficial to you but the point is if you find a habit. That actually improves your life then it's really good to repeat it and give it a chance to give you those long-term results same thing with exercise like there's no best eight week exercise plan because the results that you get in eight weeks will be dwarfed. By the results that you get in 2 years like it's way better if you do something that is super half asked for 2 years consistently than if you do the most optimized balls to the wall Eight week ultra gains program right. |
| 57:42.23 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I ah but made me think about the knowing why something works can be very beneficial. Ah but it can also be very limiting and that a lot of times people. Want to know why the oil pulling is working and and and what you're talking about is oh I'm just getting the these I do this action and then I get these benefits but I don't know why I'm getting those benefits. Ah I want to get people permission and to know that it's okay. You don't understand how it's working or why it's working all you gotta know is that it's working and and you're paying attention now. That's good enough. However, if you understand the mechanisms for by which it's working and you understand the principles now, you're gonna be able to bank. Better guesses at maybe you can be able to extrapolate that to another guest or you're able to um, ah know its limitations and and it's gonna help you conduct other experiments. But again, don't get hung up on why it's working the. I guess what I'm saying is don't stop doing something that's working just because you can't understand why it's working I think a lot of people. They don't even a lot of people won't even try something out because they they want to understand it first and my buddy had this really great saying which is don't let you? Yeah, he said? ah. |
| 59:04.22 | Max Shank | Um, I think that's good. |
| 59:12.21 | Max Shank | Right? It's like they want permission. |
| 59:18.91 | mikebledsoe | Don't let your understanding get in the way of your knowing and so you're gonna throughout your life. You're gonna know a lot more shit than you understand So like that. No. |
| 59:20.55 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 59:29.68 | Max Shank | And nobody really knows it all either. That's the thing you know like you ever do ohms I Love doing ohms. Ah um, and there's like ah. |
| 59:37.10 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah. |
| 59:43.48 | Max Shank | Four separate cycles the ah the ooh the umm and then the pause and then you go through that cycle Now What's interesting is it depends who you ask why? those are good. Are you liberating your throat Chakra are you ah activating your vagus nerve. |
| 01:00:00.45 | mikebledsoe | Yes, all of it. |
| 01:00:02.34 | Max Shank | Are you simply warming up your vocal cords and and what's what's interesting is I have a diverse set of people that I've met in my life and I'm I'm really easy to get along with. And what's funny I think I am maybe maybe I shouldn't be the authority on that I have no idea Actually I think I'm fun to be around. Ah. |
| 01:00:25.88 | mikebledsoe | I haven't seen you hang around very many people. So if I'm just going to look at the results. However, I find you easy to hang out with yeah. |
| 01:00:30.93 | Max Shank | Ah, ah yeah I mean the data would the the data would suggest that I'm hard to get along with actually um I know people who would hear me say the word chakra and they would just go. Ah. Really really you think there are chakras and I'll be like I guess not I guess I'm stupid. Ah, ah. Meanwhile I could give the vagus nerve explanation to someone and they'd be like ah no, that is just restoring the flow through your kundalini and opening your heart sha or you know whatever. So yeah, just to add to your point of maybe it's beneficial to understand the principles. Behind certain things like it I think it's valuable to understand how different tissues grow and regrow at different rates. You know the lining of your intestines regenerates replaces itself every couple days whereas Bones can be like on a 2 wo-year cycle. It's big difference. Um, but you don't you don't have to know exactly what's going on in order to harvest the benefits from it and I think that maybe is a good way to segue into the placebo and nocebo effect. |
| 01:01:44.66 | mikebledsoe | What's. |
| 01:01:54.76 | mikebledsoe | Well I want to I want to mention 1 thing before we go there is ah there's a lot of like people people only value value the latest science it seems it's like if the study is more than like a few years old it's people don't even really want to pay attention to it and I see ah a lot of these Yeah yeah. |
| 01:02:16.94 | Max Shank | Did you say a few years mean like 24 hours it's got to be brand spanking new. |
| 01:02:24.40 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, there's this, there's something about people valuing things that are newer over what's older and when I say well for instance thing about Kundalini yoga that shit is old as fuck. Ah. I don't care what words they're using to describe what's happening there. There is something happening there that is ah that enhances my experience as a human being in a way that nothing else can and so whether they call it chakras or whether we're we're. You know, tickling the vagus nerve or whatever the fuck it is it is ah it's doing something that I like and that's okay, that's totally okay, but I think a lot of these ancient traditions are using language that people. I mean this happens a lot with chinese medicine. You know they're talking about this or that and then next thing you know there's some type of scientific research study that that says something and people go did you hear about this new study and like well that really sounds like the meridian system from chinese medicine. You're like no no, it's this new scientific like okay, cool. You know what. |
| 01:03:36.67 | Max Shank | Number. |
| 01:03:38.92 | mikebledsoe | I'm gonna go with an old Chinese dude over here cause I think he knows more about this than someone who just made a discovery and has come up with a clever way of explaining it. So I'm I'm a I'm a big fan of I'm a big fan of honoring tradition and really also looking at the science and. |
| 01:03:46.47 | Max Shank | Well I call it go ahead. |
| 01:03:57.68 | mikebledsoe | I enjoy when I see science and tradition. You know there's a melding and there's ah, there's ah ah, a modern explanation that that more people are willing to accept when a lot of that like more ah the older traditional explanations for things seem like that's kind of silly. I mean happens to like old russian women too talk to these old russian women and they talk about their mothers and grandmothers and what they did how they treated their food and their medicine all this stuff and 30 years ago I would have thought man that's crazy like what but now I go oh this all makes sense like oh yeah, like this old russian woman I know. Yeah, my my mother would always we drink a ah a shot of vodka every day for health I go what are you talking about? how is alcohol going to be good for your health. Well it doesn't get mentioned that they're they're soaking these ah these really magical herbs like Rodeola or ginseng. In the vodka for years and then they break it out. It's it's high quality tinctures so things like that are happening anyways. So it's it's worth paying attention to your elders. |
| 01:04:59.84 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 01:05:09.94 | Max Shank | It's good to honor tradition and then also to challenge it honestly and I think that there's there's a whole I call it n y m It's not yet measurable like there are so many things that are true that are just not yet measurable by us. |
| 01:05:12.65 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 01:05:27.39 | Max Shank | Right now with the equipment that we have available and I think the the arrogance of people getting so pigeonholed into what is currently measurable using the equipment we have is such a limiter into that person's well-being or their ability to help somebody. Because there's a lot of stuff in isolation that may be true and then in integration may be false like for example, um, people can do research on how different frequency electromagnetic waves affect. Ah, cell right? and then can say okay this electromagnetic wave did not affect the cell negatively therefore it is safe but that has nothing to do with whether or not. That frequency of an electromagnetic wave would be safe for a whole person to experience. So when you have it so isolated like that you're missing the whole integration and the wholeness of the organism in how. It responds with that interaction. |
| 01:06:44.68 | mikebledsoe | Yeah there's there's a quote that my girlfriend posted I think I think I'll quote her put it on Twitter and to be healthy is to be whole health is english. Health in English is based on anglo-saxon word hail which means whole wholeness is necessary to live a fulfilled life. Ask you? What are you missing that prevents you from living a whole and healthy life. Yeah, and just makes me think about that is is looking at the whole person because integration is only gonna take you so far and I want to. Um, want to point out it. It may sound like we we did like there's a science bashing here I imagine some people could listen to this and be like oh they spent more time talking about how science does not apply than or where the limitations of it are than where it is and um I imagine that's. |
| 01:07:39.29 | Max Shank | Well we know what the advantages are there are obvious event we're we're having this conversation on computers in different states like of course it's it like works. But that's not see here's the thing because I'm gonna hijack what you said Mike and I Mike and I. |
| 01:07:43.39 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well I. |
| 01:07:58.31 | Max Shank | Are looking out for your health mentally physically financially and we're going to point out the things that are most likely to fuck you up and the reality is most of the benefits of science need no rhetorical argument. They need no explanation. Phone. It just works like if it's really scientific like it just works so getting the rhetoric out of the scientific method getting appeal to Authority and ad hominent attacks out of the scientific method. That's what's going to help you actually live the best. Because if you don't identify those for what they are which is huge traps you're going to get messed up. |
| 01:08:41.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well said thanks for hijacking me I love it. Let's let's shut this bad boy down last last words for the the listeners. |
| 01:08:54.22 | Max Shank | Eat lots of eggs and Salt I don't I don't know it takes more time it takes more effort to figure out what's going to work best for you. I personally followed. The worst exercise plans for my individual body for a really long time and I did it because of how I would measure up to other people and that's once again getting into that like I like saying that. |
| 01:09:16.71 | mikebledsoe | But they did. |
| 01:09:30.75 | Max Shank | Whatever measuring stick you use is also the 1 that's going to administer your beating so whatever you are measuring. It should be for an important reason and the more I think mature you get like you were talking about child adult the less you're going to care. About impressing other people with how many pounds you can lift and whatever else the more you get in tuneed with what makes your body feel the best and the strongest and the most elastic and that's actually been the biggest. Shift in my training philosophy is I used to really focus on super high level athletics and I still do. But my approach is much more about elasticity and I think that that is the ultimate. Athletic attribute is if can you bounce around without breaking because ultimately no 1 cares. How much you can squat. You don't care how much you can squat um, the amount of pounds on the bar is going to matter less and less and less the older you get and most people eventually come around. To the realization that they just want to be able to move quickly smoothly. Ah with accuracy dexterity agility without hurting and I guess that's that's basically it is it takes more effort to figure out what's. Good for you individually, but it is very well worth it. |
| 01:11:08.85 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, you know I think about this whole conversation I think about being your own scientist is really you know we can talk about being your scientist for a lot of things but for your own physical body. Um, your and your. Your internal state too. Not just your physical body. But your your mental emotional spiritual state is really just a practice of and a methodical practice of self-awareness by applying the the scientific method to yourself is to me a a spiritual practice and so ah. |
| 01:11:34.74 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 01:11:45.25 | mikebledsoe | Really pay attention to the results because in the results are the truth and so if you look at any area of your life if you look at your internal state your your physical body. Your cultural environment. The people that you talk to and hang out with and. Ah, your your physical environment. These are the these are the four different things I really look at to go is what I'm doing getting the results that I want for myself in my life and if there's a result that I don't like then it's time for me to be my own scientist and and conduct that research. If somebody's life is in Shambles I can almost guarantee you they are a very poor scientist. So even if they have a ph d so you've got to apply these things in a practical world. Not just on paper not in a laboratory. Ah, good. Scientist is able to bring this into their own life. That's so I got match where do they find you? Thank you. |
| 01:12:49.17 | Max Shank | Boy I Really like that summary. It's ah it's very I Really like the correlation you made with self-wareness because that's really what it is. It's self-awareness with good record keeping and that's how you're going to find the truth. That's also how you're going to gain wisdom. |
| 01:13:03.99 | mikebledsoe | Me. |
| 01:13:07.76 | Max Shank | Because wisdom as we described before is knowing yourself and acting accordingly. So. that's that's huge um you can find me at Macshank dot com slash elasticity for my latest program which ah is the result of about. 15 years what we just talked about today. So that's where you can find me. |
| 01:13:26.25 | mikebledsoe | So by the way folks his programs are always good. Always good. Um, yeah that your five minute flow was good for me I enjoyed that 1 |
| 01:13:39.99 | Max Shank | That was very ah, successful Shockingly so it was almost like people needed that reminder to wiggle for five minutes and drink a cup of water in the morning and and look very. |
| 01:13:53.22 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, yeah. |
| 01:13:59.45 | Max Shank | Scientific. It was a guess and that's where it all starts. |
| 01:14:02.93 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, good work. Ah find me and on Instagram mike underscore bloodtso and I have the strong coach summit coming up in March you can find more details about that at the strongcoach dot com slash summit. Thanks join us. Love you brother. |
| 01:14:20.55 | Max Shank | Thank you Love you. |
| 00:00.00 | mikebledsoe | Welcome to Monday mornings with mike and max and today we're gonna be talking about choice how to choose Better. We're gonna start off with a quote from Dr. Victor frankl and the quote is between stimulus and response. There is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response and our response lies our growth and our freedom. |
| 00:25.18 | Max Shank | Oh So when I think about this I always use fasting as a way to get people into this mode of thinking because we're so conditioned to. Eat whenever we feel that spark of a stimulus like oh I'm hungry and usually that Stimulus gets confused because you're not physically Hungry. You're just ah, chronologically hungry. Like it's time to eat or I'm bored so you reflexively go after the food and I think this concept of taking a pause so you can choose with your neocortex or what I call the wizard brain is maybe the.. The only important aspect for living a better life because if you're using your lizard brain to choose you have no control over what happens it is valuable to make Lizard brain reflexive choices when there is. Imminent danger but the rest of the time you'll probably get the worst outcome possible and you're certainly not able to see the big picture. In fact in the book Dune which is probably my favorite fiction book the test they do to Determine. If. The young lad is human is they put his hand in a box that gives crazy crazy pain and simultaneously the proctor of this test is holding a poisoned needle at his neck and says if you take your hand out of the box I will kill you. So. The whole idea is being able to suffer the pain of your hand feeling like it's melting off for the big picture of survival and that's pretty much the key to better choices is. You have to be willing to sacrifice what you want now for what you want most and if you don't take that Pause. You have no chance. |
| 02:41.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I Also think about the the response without without taking any space. You know there's no space. There's just a ah a reaction. A response is something that's done consciously. Your reaction is. Is unconscious and ah most of our behavior is a reaction. It's unconscious and a lot of it. It's trained over time and ah 1 of the things that I've noticed is that we tend to be ah, very. Very poor at recognizing which reactions or unconscious ah ah reactions we have ah are man my brain's freezing on this 1 Ah. They're not serving us anymore. We don't recognize when they're not serving us anymore a lot of times and so. |
| 03:38.32 | Max Shank | I think it has to do with the subconscious self-image. So whatever Selfim image you truly hold subconsciously that's going to be the driver of those reactive or reflexive or unconscious decisions. |
| 03:53.69 | mikebledsoe | Say more. |
| 03:56.76 | Max Shank | Okay, so you have this version of yourself this story of yourself that you believe that you are comfortable with remember the eco's top Priority is to sustain to keep things status quo to get as much control as Possible. So. Whatever your self-image is like your subconscious will reflexively choose to reinforce that Position. So If you're not giving yourself well, you need 2 things a you need to take that pause if you would like to choose consciously. And B which proves quite a bit harder is you have to alter your selfimage which takes conscious practice and I think writing down what your target self looks like I know James clear ah talks about how. You make up an identity and then you'll choose to be your choices will be congruent with that identity. So That's 1 way of looking at that. |
| 05:03.59 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and well an identity is is built up like what's connected to identity is is beliefs what you believe about yourself. But Also what you believe about the world and if we want to look at this from a ah physiological perspective. There's a lot of neural connections. There's actual physical neural connections that that either support or don't support ways of viewing the world and so a lot of that has to be done and this is what they look at with Psychedelic Medicine Why it so helpful is because it. At a physiological level changes those neural connections or allows those neural connections to to change and so the more repetition you have an old identity or in an identity I won't say old in an identity the the more physical Connections. You're going to have so it it takes. There's a bit of work that has to be done in order for someone to change how they view themselves and how they they view the world and what they believe about those things. |
| 06:07.57 | Max Shank | Big time you gotta be willing to like this like a snake that doesn't shed its skin will die So You have to be willing to shed those dead layers in order to embrace that new identity and. That can prove very difficult because you have to basically suffer a partial death in order to do that. |
| 06:31.61 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that that identity is from from my view is largely formed from avoiding certain feelings. So kids at a young age. They they. They experience something. They have a feeling they don't like it they decide hey I want to avoid feeling this ever again. So I will behave in a way that allows me to avoid feeling this way and if I ever start to feel this way then I'm going to change my behavior and that really shapes. The identity that shapes that or what we could call personality so that shapes personality that shapes identity and that ah that identity stays away from certain things and indulges in other things and ah. You know we talk about you know parts of that that ego or that identity that's going to die and it doesn't want to die. But I think a lot of it is is the the self doesn't want to have that experience it doesn't want to experience that feeling that that feeling that feeling to a child is like death. You know you ever watch a 4 year old just go to fucking pieces because someone took his favorite logo lego you know or or toy car he is acting like it's the end of the world. Yeah. |
| 07:52.27 | Max Shank | Well it is because he has the inability to see the big picture I think that's 1 of the things that I've noticed most um is that for a child It's either the best thing ever or the worst tragedy that has ever befallen them. And there's not really an in-between because they're purely present and in fact, their brain waves are basically similar I think it's theta brainwave to psychedelics. So everything is new and different. Everything is right now. So there's no there's no attachment to. Last week and there's no understanding of next week it's just what's happening right now I skinned my knee it hurts I'm going to scream Bloody murder or what's happening right now I'm chasing a butterfly and running around and this is the best butterfly I've ever seen. |
| 08:42.92 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and so a lot of behavior comes from what that 4 year old chooses and that those neural connect connections are made. There's feelings that are judged as to wanting to avoid all these things and so that that starts creating a lot of that. On a macro scale. The unconscious patterns. The unconscious reactions. Ah, and so ah, that that's why I say the majority of how we behave is is unconscious. |
| 09:09.47 | Max Shank | Um, it's not. |
| 09:15.14 | Max Shank | And it's not just avoidance right because we're always naturally moving toward pleasure away from paint. So would you say it's both. |
| 09:21.94 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well,, there's there's things we avoid and there's things we indulge in ah and I mean I've known people. Well I'll talk about myself. Ah I used to indulge in guilt and so someone would think well you're crazy. Like well if you want to know what you tend to indulge in is just where do you spend the majority of your emotional space. Where is you know? Maybe you're playing a video game or you're working and your mind is fully engaged in something else. But that moment that you break from that. And you get that moment with yourself What kind of memories. Do you pull up? you know, do you pull up memories that make you feel joy Happy Sad Guilty you know, Ah, whatever it may be and so I think that it would be good for for anybody to do an assessment and go. Ah, what is it that I indulge in and then also what are the emotions that I rarely experience or maybe maybe I start to experience them and I figure out a way to ah ah avoid Them. You know there's where a lot of addiction comes from is. Ah, the addictive behavior is an avoidance you know people are addicted to video games or porn or yeah substances and it's because they want to get away from something. So Ah yeah. |
| 10:45.29 | Max Shank | It's all escapism right? it it doesn't matter what lever that you're using. It's more about what are you trying to escape and if you don't go through that then you'll just pick up a new addiction if you happen to quit 1 It's like chain smoking and donuts at an a a meeting. |
| 10:58.34 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 11:02.99 | Max Shank | Like ah this so much better and maybe for some people. It is a lot better. |
| 11:04.75 | mikebledsoe | We will get addicted to exercise I Watched you know I'm sure you do too you we we both own gyms and there's people that come in that are I don't know how many people there were. They're basically alcoholics and chain smokers before they they came to work out. |
| 11:10.68 | Max Shank | Oh yeah. |
| 11:17.30 | Max Shank | And right. |
| 11:22.97 | mikebledsoe | And then they found Crossfit and which cross Crossfit I think got popular amongst those types of individuals. Ah yeah, they because the thing is is if you if you if you push yourself under heaviest loads possible. |
| 11:31.26 | Max Shank | Masochists. |
| 11:41.30 | mikebledsoe | Or you go to the extreme and get into these glycolytic workouts or you get into these high endurance workouts where you know you start getting into this place where your mind really has to be focused on the present or else you get fucked up. So if you're squatting 500 pounds and you're not present. |
| 11:54.16 | Max Shank | Further. |
| 11:59.87 | mikebledsoe | Guess what it's you're gonna hurt yourself. You know you're you're going for time and all you're trying to do is breathe and that's the only thing you can think about is breathing and feeling your body Even if it's not enjoyable. It's still better than you know, having that moment with yourself. So I think that I think that particular. |
| 12:05.84 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 12:16.45 | Max Shank | Um, the. |
| 12:19.19 | mikebledsoe | Exercise protocol lends itself to people who who want to escape. |
| 12:23.89 | Max Shank | I Think it's good to like the idea of Escape is we don't avoid things we avoid feelings. That's what's so interesting and when it comes to the identity. You also want to consider the role and you have to look at. |
| 12:30.46 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 12:43.51 | Max Shank | A couple things neurologically so neurons that fire together wire together and Neuron neural pathways are just like So basically the more you fire nerves along a pathway. |
| 12:47.27 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 13:02.96 | Max Shank | The more efficient you get at firing that same neural pathway which is why sometimes people feel a familiar pain pattern like in their shoulder or whatever. Even though there's no problem there anymore. It's just been so reinforced because what happens you get this fatty. |
| 13:14.18 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 13:21.52 | Max Shank | Tissue called Myelin which is called a Myelin sheath it wraps around the Axon and it's basically like insulation. So The conductivity is Greater. There's less signal Loss. So It's like it's basically like going from a dirt hiking path. To a superhighway. You know the more you go through that same neurological firing pathway. Ah the more efficiently that you can go through there and there's definitely less resistance which is another electricity term. It's funny how there's all these. |
| 13:58.19 | mikebledsoe | Well it is a it is an electrical system. |
| 14:00.74 | Max Shank | Similarities. It is electrical exactly so you got to recognize that the more that you have fired a certain pathway. It's probably going to take um, an equal and opposite amount of counter. Action action or counteractivity to form a ah new pathway because you will subconsciously or reflexively gravitate Toward. What is the lowest energy cost and most familiar. |
| 14:31.85 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and going back to the quote from the beginning is that that ah that time in between is ah the time in between stimulus and response that space is our power to choose. |
| 14:38.90 | Max Shank | The. |
| 14:50.54 | mikebledsoe | And at least our growth and freedom and so there are what you pointed out before the show there are there are times where you want a reaction so you know Imminent Danger Imminent Physical Danger. You usually want to rely on reactivity If you. Know you know what? I'm just going to take 3 breaths and gonna I'm gonna think about this when you're dead right? And so yeah, flinch is a man Ah Tony Blauer Ah went to 1 of his courses and ah. |
| 15:09.94 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, while a ah punch is coming at you and you should have just flinched. |
| 15:27.46 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, he he bases everything off the flinch because he goes look. We could train you in all these crazy tactics. But you're not going to train it enough like I'm not going to train you well enough in a weekend. So let's just go up. Let's let's start with the flinch and then. |
| 15:28.47 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 15:43.29 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 15:45.91 | mikebledsoe | After you flinch. What do you do next because the flinch is actually a good reaction if somebody goes to hit you or you're being shot at or you know, whatever it's and you're not going up. You're not going to untrain that flinch and so. |
| 16:00.60 | Max Shank | It's like reflexive piggybacking right? He's taking this reflex that already happens and you're reinforcing it in a better way. |
| 16:07.73 | mikebledsoe | Right? right? And so um, so some we're not saying that everything. Every reaction is a poor reaction but I do want to point out is um, having been myself I've done some tactical training in the military and the whole point of that tactical training is that you're going to repeat the same behavior. So many times that it becomes a reaction. They actually when you get into a firefight. You don't want to be in this. You do want to try to remain calm. |
| 16:35.94 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 16:45.37 | mikebledsoe | And you do want to breathe easy if you can but at the beginning of ah of a situation when a situation breaks out. You're not gonna start off calm you're gonna go in this heightened state and then you've got to calm yourself down with breath from there but that that 2 to 3 hree minutes that takes you to calm down. That's. That's when you get killed and so you gotta the the whole idea is there what what? I'm pointing out is there is a way to there's 2 parts here. There's a way to take a breath and train yourself to have greater. Time to consider your choices for the best response possible but there's also the ability to train yourself situationally to where you don't have to have that time to respond in order to make the best choice possible so in both cases. |
| 17:37.57 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 17:40.31 | mikebledsoe | We're trying to maximize for best outcome by either reaction or by choice and your reaction can only be decided before the situation occurs and the ability to respond is something that can happen in the moment. But only if you're not put in to as long as you you can remain downregulated to a degree. So if someone comes in your house and starts putting a gun in your face your ability down regulates not going to be too Great. You're better to go with your reaction until you can downregulate into a better state. |
| 18:14.68 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, maybe I think um, what use. Ah you know you can make the right choice and still get a bad outcome I Think what you're touching on. There is really valuable because it's. |
| 18:18.73 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, maybe is the right answer. Ah. |
| 18:28.40 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 18:33.87 | Max Shank | You're practicing 2 different things. The first thing you're practicing is the ability to stay calm under pressure and when I was competing and fighting. We would basically 1 guy would get in the corner of the ring and he was not allowed to throw punches and he was not allowed to move. And he would just get punched at any who the the practice was to watch all of the punches come. You know we were allowed to keep our hands up, but the whole point was don't think about anything else. Just let the punches come and try to keep your eyes open so you don't go into this. Flint response. So that practice is calm under pressure which is giving you the ability to use your higher order thinking and then the other thing you're talking about matches the different stages of learning so you have. At the very beginning when you're learning a new thing. It's pure cognitive stage like juggling or music at first you are thinking about everything that's going on. You're thinking like okay I have to throw the ball here and then I have to throw the ball here and then I have to move my hand like this and then basically you get to the. Autonomous level which is so it's like cognitive associative. Ah, sometimes there's like more steps than that basically but the end result is that if you practice something enough. It becomes very automatic. So that's the second thing that you're talking about is you train something so much. That you have implanted a new reflex. |
| 20:09.33 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean you're you're reminding me of the the quadrant of ah the unconscious incompetence conscious incompetence conscious competence and unconscious competence. So the stages of learning being that so I'll repeat everybody. |
| 20:19.83 | Max Shank | Unconscious competence. Yeah, exactly. |
| 20:28.24 | mikebledsoe | Starts with unconscious incompetence. This is you're not good at something and you don't even know how to improve at it and you may not even know that you're bad at it until you're put in the situation then conscious incompetence is I know that I suck at it and I may be trying to get better at it. But I'm having to think about it and I'm still not that good at it. |
| 20:37.50 | Max Shank | The. |
| 20:47.79 | mikebledsoe | Conscious competence is I have to think about it in order to be good at it if I become unconscious during the process I'll slide into old behavior old patterns and do it poorly and then unconscious competence which is ah which is I have I've intentionally trained this behavior and now I. Become competent at this skill or whatever it is um even in an unconscious state and so I I think that the idea is to move through that with as many things that you find Valuable. You know your your values are going to Dictate. Ah, what it is that you're going to become competent at. |
| 21:24.27 | Max Shank | Well and what's really interesting about this is you can ah build really bad habits going through the same Way. So That's 1 of the values of having a really good coach or a mentor and 1 of the dramatically bad costs. Having a bad mentor is you might build bad patterns like let's say you're learning how to exercise and you learn exactly the wrong way. But you get better and better at the wrong way and that's why it's so valuable to have someone. |
| 21:56.56 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 22:02.77 | Max Shank | Pay attention to you like in some of the dance classes I've taken. Um I Really appreciate when the teacher will call out a mistake right away. So I don't reinforce that bad pattern. It's just like you know I'm doing my thing and I'm trying to keep up I'm doing this like African dance shit. |
| 22:14.54 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, um. |
| 22:22.76 | Max Shank | And you know of course I'm coming from a little bit of fight background but also a lot of just robotic exercising and I just hear like this guy yelled no and I'm like startled but I really appreciate it because the last thing I want to do is reinforce a destructive pattern. |
| 22:40.74 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 22:42.54 | Max Shank | And make that the autonomous thing So I like I like where we're at right now so we have reflexive or reactive and then we have conscious choice which can be um, improved upon it allows us to use the neocortex and I think. Unless you have something else to add the next logical place to go is logical fallacies where you are operating from your wizard brain but you are ah basically being tricked to make. A destructive or ah, a wrong choice because of 1 of these like psychological or logical fallacies like ah the sunk cost fallacy if you're familiar with. So yeah, tell folks at home about the sunk cost fallacy. Well. |
| 23:30.25 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, go it? Yeah tell tell tell us all. Yeah. |
| 23:38.73 | Max Shank | The sunk cost fallacy is like you have put in a lot of effort already. So even though you should not put any more effort because it's a lost cause you'll keep putting more in just because you've invested so much and the easiest example is if you're playing poker and. You put in more chips and you put in more chips and you put in more chips and you see the final card and you don't you don't make your hand that you are trying to make you don't have a good winning. You don't have a chance at winning. But you still put more money in the pot just because you've invested so much and. It's hard to tell the difference between getting crushed by the sunk cost fallacy and grit like sometimes you should persevere and follow through and sometimes you should cut your losses so. It's really hard for people to. Notice the sunk cost fallacy and if you're operating from like your lizard Brain. It's nearly impossible to because you'll be emotionally locked in. You'll be emotionally hooked with that fallacy. |
| 24:50.16 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean you hit on a good point there which is I think a lot of people a lot of entrepreneurs run into that is ah you know because it's getting difficult. Is it something that am I not meant to do This is it supposed to be easy am I not supposed to do this should I change industry should I. Is my product. No good but whatever it is and then ah yeah on the other side is and you hear you hear ah coaches and consultants and speakers recommend different things. Yeah on 1 side you got the the people going if you don't love what you're doing then you should quit and then. |
| 25:27.27 | Max Shank | The 1 |
| 25:29.33 | mikebledsoe | On the other side which by the way I'm a pretty good quitter. Ah, the other side is you know now you got to grind it out and this and that and so 1 of the things that I've learned how to ah make this choice because I've quit a lot of things but I will also will also grind um and I've had to learn. There's a lot of grinding I did where I should have walked away sooner and there are things that I got lazy about and didn't put a lot of effort into because I ah thought it should ah should be easier. Um, and sometimes it was ah but I've all you know I've stuck with things longer than I should have and I've I wouldn't say I've ditched things before but there's there's been times where I spent a lot of time contemplating whether I should quit something while while grinding through and. Really finding that what I what I like to do is go look I will grind I've actually worked more this past I'd say like 6 seven months than I Haven in a very long time I say the last 3 years it's been 3 years since I worked this this much and I've worked hard but. |
| 26:41.49 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 26:45.85 | mikebledsoe | Ah, but the thing is I'm inspired so I'm doing I'm working a lot of hours. Um, figuring out how to be as productive as possible I've done a lot of shit this year with my business that did not work I get I hit like roadblock after roadblock I the business. Ah. Almost ran out of money at 1 point there was I hit a lot of things that there that some people would say man. Maybe maybe like if you look at the year before the business was doing twice as good What's what's going on now. Maybe you're just not supposed to do this and and that crossed my mind for a moment but. What I really experienced was like I'm still inspired to do this I'm not working because out of desperation I'm not working because like I need to make a dollar like I could I know and and part of it is is like I've been around long enough that I can make dollars a lot of different ways like I've done it a few times |
| 27:33.55 | Max Shank | Ah, what. |
| 27:43.66 | mikebledsoe | Ah, exactly yeah, super easy money. Ah, it's really it's easy hard money. But ah, the. |
| 27:43.92 | Max Shank | Prostitution For example, easy easy money for you. |
| 27:52.74 | Max Shank | Well I Like what you're saying because it requires wisdom to know if you have a tendency to quit early or a tendency to um, get emotionally involved in a decision. That's not good overall and. What I noticed part of the reason 1 of the many reasons I enjoy chopping it up with you is because you and I approach things very differently like I really have not taken a lot of big risks I've never really laid out ah a large amount of Capital. Into anything I've always been like the the slow cooker type of mentality. But I'm also able to try more things and I'm able to um, like cut those losses a little bit more easily and. |
| 28:31.65 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 28:46.81 | Max Shank | I Know we've mentioned in a podcast before but you got to recognize that anyone who's done Well whether it's like the more like long slow or the you know company just blows up and makes a ton is basically every success story has a lot of failures. |
| 29:05.14 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 29:06.30 | Max Shank | Along the way and you're not going to know which thing people will like the best and and what people like the best has nothing to do with how much effort you put into it either. Um, and then the last thing that you said that I liked was. |
| 29:19.68 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 29:25.65 | Max Shank | You feel like purpose or passion. Maybe I'm maybe I'm the 1 who came up with the word purpose there. But if you are if you feel like you are satisfying a life purpose or following your bliss as Joseph Campbell Puts it. You won't find anything difficult like you'll just keep putting in more time you won't find yourself wishing you were doing something else because you're like I'm doing what I'm supposed to do I'm Doing. It's like ah a hammer hammering nails like this is the intended purpose I am a hammer. My purpose is hammering Nails. So If you're doing something that you're really interested in ah then you'll be able to get through those moments where things don't seem to go right. |
| 30:16.20 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, ah 1 of the things that's really helped me out ah is I'd say more recently I used to get really hung up on um, the purpose or passion conversation and. I noticed that when I was younger and I see this with a lot of young entrepreneurs or new entrepreneurs is they get caught up with a thing like they're passionate about you know a type of coaching or they're passionate about a method technique. Whatever it is and because. Probably because it made an a large impact in their own life and for myself. Um, when I started my latest business. The strong coach. Um, actually it's not the latest build it business. It's the latest business I'm still running ah the strong coach. I started that business because I loved coaches and I put coaches First I had all these ideas of what I want to teach them how I want to teach them all these things and then I started with my beta group. My first cohort back in 2018 and I realized they needed no a bunch of shit I had no intention to teach and I wasn't as interested in teaching it but I already but I had the information so I I needed to give it to them. Um, and I noticed that. Because I was so passionate about helping coaches with whatever they needed to be successful in getting their own clients results because I was so passionate about that that I didn't care if I was teaching business or leadership because I was more passionate at the time if I were to if I were to choose a passion around a thing that I wanted to teach. It would be around leadership and personal responsibility and and and a lot of personal development topics. Not um, as much about business even though I I had taught business before. |
| 32:17.00 | Max Shank | So you got clear. Ah you got you got clear on who you wanted to serve more than anything else. |
| 32:25.94 | mikebledsoe | It's about who and who and so like 3 and a half years later I am more passionate or I I would say I carry the same amount of passion now as I did 3 and a half years ago and that's because I did I found. Group of people who I want to help the most the people who I would surround myself with the the people who like I don't I can't solve all the world's problems. Um I I want to make people as healthy as possible and make people on the planet healthy. But I know that. That people aren't gonna do what I say and I don't know how to do everything I don't know what the right answers for everything I'm not going to create something that solves all the problems but I know huh I'm sorry you're you're doomed but I but I go you know what though like I look at things and I go look I am. |
| 33:09.35 | Max Shank | Damn it I hoped you would I hoped you would. |
| 33:22.91 | mikebledsoe | Uniquely positioned to help coaches and coaches are uniquely positioned to help people in ah in an era where there's an over too much information to sift through and so it takes someone who's going to be an expert in something and and hold someone's hand and guide them there. So um, so like you know sometimes sometimes there are moments where I'm like man am I really doing something that's making the difference in the world I Want to make um and then you know I remind myself of that So when it gets when it gets. What I know is what I'm doing now is what I know how to do best. That's gonna make the the most positive impact for others and myself and and and the thing is is I read this book mastery by Robert Green I know I've brought this up on the show before but he talks about having you know. |
| 34:08.76 | Max Shank | So when when. |
| 34:20.80 | mikebledsoe | People who create really innovative things in the world that make a big difference tend to have mastered up to 3 things and it could take 7 to 10 years to master something so a lot of people don't come up with their greatest innovations till they're in their forty s fifty sixty s because they needed time to master a few things and. And I look at it and I go am I going to do this forever I have people go how long are you going to coach coaches and I go as long as long as it's obvious that I should keep doing it and the way I'll know it's obvious to do something else is when something else comes along that just completely. Ah, feel feels bigger and more expansive than what I'm ah, currently doing and for someone who I'm someone who really loves having their options open. You know I have yeah, that's ah, that's a personality trait that you know on 1 side of the coin you have people. Who if they make a commitment to something in a month from now is like on on Friday the twenty ninth I'm going to be at this person's house doing this thing man that makes them feel so good that would drive me nuts because I'm like oh. Like is there a better opportunity going to come up is that go to be my favorite choice that night. how I don't know how I'm going to feel the week leading up to that I'm somebody who likes that I feel more relaxed and better about having ah many choices up to the last minute so there's different different personalities and so because. |
| 35:35.94 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 35:46.75 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 35:51.54 | mikebledsoe | I Have this thing where I don't really I prefer freedom over over the the illusion of certainty The the yeah I do prefer a little more chaos over order. But ah the some. |
| 35:56.47 | Max Shank | Over order? yeah. |
| 36:09.75 | mikebledsoe | Thing I keep my mind is well if this isn't what I'm supposed to be doing because I coached a lot of coaches. So I this is the kind of the thing I get from them. It's like oh I don't know if this is what I'm supposed to be doing I'm like who cares just do it and it doesn't you can always change it later and and everything you're doing right now. |
| 36:20.79 | Max Shank | Try it and see yeah. |
| 36:27.16 | mikebledsoe | If if you're meant to do something else when you get to that thing. You're meant to be doing the big pie in the sky thing which probably doesn't exist ah is like raining on people's parades ah is that you're practicing everything you've been doing up into this moment is getting you prepared for that. So. For me if I'm if I'm getting better at business I'm like man this is great getting better at marketing copywriting creating offers making social media posts podcasting. It's all like even if I'm not doing a thing that I'm quote unquote supposed to be doing in 5 years none of those skills are going to be bad to have accumulated in order to to achieve that and I've I've had moments in my current life where I go wow I had to go through you know all this bullshit. What seemed like bullshit at the time so that I can be effective at what I do now and having a lot of gratitude for it. |
| 37:21.91 | Max Shank | Are. |
| 37:25.49 | mikebledsoe | And I I bring this up because I I want people to be able to put themselves wholeheartedly into the choices that they're making in this moment and get as much out of it as possible learn as much as you possibly can and. While holding this perspective has really helped me to achieve peace when in the face of uncertainty. |
| 37:50.73 | Max Shank | Well, it probably makes a lot easier because it makes it easier to choose when you have a clear purpose because then you will choose congruently with that purpose if you have a clear role or identity and a clear purpose then the choices are going to be easier. So The other thing that you mentioned is you're going to change your mind like if you are are waiting to make the last decision you will never make 1 You know what? I mean like I just want to. But yeah, ah because that's also me like i'm. |
| 38:18.79 | mikebledsoe | Um I like I like how you said that if you're waiting to make the last decision. Yeah. |
| 38:29.51 | Max Shank | Ah, naturally very patient. It's easy for me to not be dynamic when there doesn't seem to be a need for it. I mean charlie munger says about you know patience and prudence in the past and then betting big when the the time is correct and that's really more. My style like I I've recognized that in life. You know, even like growing up broke. Ah, you don't have to make a lot of decisions. You just have to bet big when the time is right? So you don't have to be racing around on a wheel all the time. So the whole idea of like decision fatigue sounds like kind of funny when you realize how few decisions you actually need to make it's just that when you make them you have to really? um, do so heavily when the odds are heavily in your favor. |
| 39:22.22 | mikebledsoe | I Think a lot of people. Also they they make a choice and they start questioning their choice instead of giving giving their the choice they made their full attention. |
| 39:23.94 | Max Shank | And. |
| 39:33.92 | Max Shank | Yeah, and it's good to like evaluate your choices so you can make better decisions in the future but you want to um, give things a chance to work before you you quit on them I think and the fact that you bring up coaching is perfect because. |
| 39:46.66 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 39:52.63 | Max Shank | What what is the job of a coach if not to help you make better choices now the tactic for how you do that you can ask leading questions. You can point blank give them a recipe and say like hey I have this recipe for putting together an offer. So if you follow it. And you fill in the blanks your offer will probably be a lot better than whatever you come up with on your own that's like 1 way that you can coach someone is you can teach them a formula and the other way that you can coach people is you can provide Feedback. You're doing well this you're doing not so well you should change this. You should keep doing this um and then you can also answer questions. We talked last week about the difference between support which is answering questions and accountability which is I'm asking you questions. Um, and it's all it's all about how to make better choices and I think that's a perfect segue into authority which is another logical fallacy that people fall into as well. So you have the authority of a coach you are going to put. More weight into what a coach says just the same way. You're going to put more weight into what your doctor says because they allegedly know more than you do about health and they may in some ways know a lot more than you do about health. But if it's tricky because. Authority is how we get comparative advantage. So comparative advantage is an economics term. Basically if I can earn 3 hundred per hour coaching then I pay an electrician 1 hundred per hour. Um, the overall gain is better. Because I couldn't that's an hour that I couldn't spend coaching if I tried to do the electoral myself even if the result was just as good which it wouldn't be but you have to ah give the authority to that electrician you have to trust that he's going to. Make the right choice for you and so our whole society is is based off of that type of authority in different areas and it gets tricky when you start. Um. So like Authoritarianism I guess is where we'll come from there and I hope I didn't like gloss over too many things but basically authoritarianism is where 1 person makes all the choices for everybody else and controls the choosing and that's not what we have done in ah America for a long time. |
| 42:41.42 | Max Shank | In most cases. Um, but we do selectively have um, centralized control and people argue politics all the time but the only argument really worth having is. Who is the authority and what is their Jurisdiction So who decides and when do they get to decide and we've all kind of agreed that if somebody murders a guy and the judge says guilty then we take away that person's freedom and throw them into Jail even though they would. |
| 43:18.83 | mikebledsoe | Right? So yeah. |
| 43:19.32 | Max Shank | Not choose that right? So That's that's basically the only argument worth having is who's in charge and when do they get to decide. But of course you know if you watch the news people are arguing about stupid bullshit all the time like nobody is talking about. Authority and Jurisdiction. Even though those are the only important arguments to have. |
| 43:40.44 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and Authority is is not something that somebody can just assume Authority is granted by the individual or a group of individuals. So if you hire a coach you're choosing for that person to have authority. Um, and. And it's not absolute authority with a coach because they're making suggestions right? It's not like they're not going to I want to meet the coach that uses the stick just just put a ah shot collar on your balls. |
| 44:02.36 | Max Shank | Right? That's how I do my coaching. |
| 44:16.51 | mikebledsoe | And every time you do something I don't like I'm going to zap you. |
| 44:18.22 | Max Shank | I Have a farm out in the middle of nowhere where people have to give up all their worldly possessions and then I beat them until they're great coaches. Ah so the other the I. |
| 44:28.45 | mikebledsoe | I Um I just I just got uncomfortable I'm like ah too close to the truth. No I'm just kidding. |
| 44:37.60 | Max Shank | The the other side of um, the logical fallacy of appeal to authority which is um, it's a way to say that my choice is inarguable if I say I'm the doctor I'm the scientist I'm the ph d. Ah, you have to trust me then that is an appeal to authority which is another logical fallacy and you're very likely to be coerced into a bad decision. The other um side of that is an ad hominem attack. Which is where you're attacking the individual and you are trying to disqualify what they have to say so you know you have a person a and person b let's say person a is an authoritarian and let's just say we'll just call him doctor science because those are really good authority tags. And then we'll have person b we'll call him a conspiracy nut job and the whole idea here is if you focus on the authority of these labels then you're not going to be evaluating or choosing based on the content of the arguments. So if someone who has lots of authority makes a bad argument and you just respect their authority. You might walk into a trap similarly if someone is labeled as a nutjob or a wacko or whatever. You're not even going to give any credence to what their argument is even if it has a valid premise and a logical thought process. So. That's why it's really important to not um, Blindly follow an authority or blindly ignore someone who's been labeled as like bad. |
| 46:26.36 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah I mean you got to think for yourself, you got to you got to be able to take the information and and process it but people people that's not an efficient way to do it right? There's it's like ah cultural neural pathways are set up. |
| 46:27.13 | Max Shank | Or dumb essentially. |
| 46:44.45 | mikebledsoe | To just say all right? Whatever this person says we'll just do it I don't have to think about it's It's culturally, it's a cultural unconscious pattern that's been built in. |
| 46:53.24 | Max Shank | Well and it's responsibility. It's the difference between a child and an adult and a big part of growing up is you are no longer ah blindly following what the parent or the Authority says the whole concept of freedom itself is about choice. |
| 46:58.30 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 47:12.11 | Max Shank | The only difference between sex and rape is Choice. There's no, there's mechanically.. It's like the Same. It's just about whether you have a choice or not so it's really important to understand that your freedom. Lies in your ability to say yes or to say no your ability to choose freely is what freedom is all about and I can't think of a more important concept and like you said Authority is given. |
| 47:30.72 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 47:47.20 | Max Shank | Right? We have these rules in our society. The rulers rule with rules and really we have crime and punishment which means we have labeled something as a crime and we have a consequence that follows it so you are sort of accepting. Those consequences for your actions and when you accept responsibility for your actions then you also have power over your choices part of the reason a lot of people don't want to do that. Ah, myself included for a long time is then you also are taking potentially the blame for those choices. But it. It really is the difference between ah the child role and the adult role if you are willing to accept the risk then you get the reward and and reward is just a type of consequence. It's like what happens consequently what happens next after you. |
| 48:45.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, and 1 thing I want to point out is well I think I think you said you you talked about the word. No and just the the ability to say no ah is highly underrated. Um. |
| 48:46.16 | Max Shank | After you choose. |
| 49:04.94 | mikebledsoe | Not used and the thing is is no matter how someone's labeled if they don't honor your no if if someone is trying to do something to you and they and you say no and they don't they don't you know they still push the moment that you're. There's physical interaction. It's called violence and that's immoral so to not honor. Someone's note to to not get their their consent is ah is violence. Um, whether that be ah for sex or for a vaccine. It's. Both of these are violence if it's forced upon you? Yeah, So well if if it's well I would say violence is the initiation of force and force could be We could I like to put violence in the category of. |
| 49:47.74 | Max Shank | It's coercion right? because Violence violence isn't always immoral is the only slight disagreement. |
| 50:01.41 | mikebledsoe | You initiated the the physical interaction. The force and a defense is just using force like if someone comes into my house and tries to Rob me and I shoot them I didn't conduct violence I I used force and so. |
| 50:09.31 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 50:14.86 | Max Shank | Ah, that's why yeah I thought I I would say the opposite I would say you responded violently but you were right to do so so and I think you you and I do a good job of being semantically precise or at least clarifying what we're talking about. |
| 50:22.85 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 50:33.20 | Max Shank | So that we understand what the other person is saying. |
| 50:33.17 | mikebledsoe | Right? Well and coercion is the threat of violence. It's It's the it's and or the the threat of you know you're never gonna work in this town again or you're you You can't you know. |
| 50:38.14 | Max Shank | Well, that's 1 way. |
| 50:52.13 | mikebledsoe | To take away your livelihood or whatever. So that's coercion. Either way. |
| 50:53.94 | Max Shank | So coercion as I've understood it to be defined is the deliberate interference with property using fraud or force. |
| 51:05.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, ah Wikipedia says coercion is is compelling a party to act in an unvoluntary manner by use of threats including Force. It involves a set of various types of forceful actions that violate the free will of an individual to induce a desired response. For example. A bully demanding lunch money from a student or the student gets beaten. These actions may include extortion Blackmail torture threats to induce favors or even sexual assault in law coercion is codified as a duress as a duress crime such actions are used as leverage to force the victim. To act in a way contrary to their own interests. So ah, yeah, yeah I think I think that for for both of what we said that that summarizes it is it really really well and so. |
| 51:45.37 | Max Shank | That tracks. |
| 51:56.80 | mikebledsoe | I point this out and part of this conversation was inspired by a dm conversation I got on Instagram with somebody who was very emotionally triggered by a post I made and to be told the post was supposed to cause people to think and connect some dots. |
| 52:14.14 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 52:15.88 | mikebledsoe | Um, and you know I imagine a lot of my followers were able to connect those dots because I got a lot of people who liked it and then I got 1 person who did not like it and ah she was extremely flustered and even admitted you know in in the the dm she said. |
| 52:24.80 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 52:33.81 | mikebledsoe | You know every fiber of my being says this is wrong. It's like there's this admission of like this emotional hijack or a version of logical fallacy and um, you know I think we we got to be careful of those things. Um and and this is why. Ah, the United states was set up as a republic and not a democracy. Ah the the founding fathers recognized democracy as ah as a dangerous as a dangerous way of doing things the greeks the greeks started off as a republic and then they deteriorated. |
| 52:54.10 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 53:10.90 | mikebledsoe | Into democracy thinking you know all the while the story the narrative that was told and the story that's being told now is that democracy is an democracy is an evolution when in fact, it's ah, a devolution from a Republic and a Republic is set up in a way that that reduces. The amount of Authority a single person can have it really dilutes. Ah this ability to create violent action or coercion against a certain population of people it it creates a lot of checks and balances. It's why there's an electoral college. Ah, for voting most people don't really understand how that works. Um, yeah so um. |
| 53:52.27 | Max Shank | Yeah Mob rule. Otherwise right I like that you called it a demockery that's kind of hilarious I know that was like a freudianlip or something but I I think a demockery it's mob rule if. |
| 54:00.69 | mikebledsoe | It was it was but I'm using it from now. Well like you said a democracy is my role. Yeah. |
| 54:08.94 | Max Shank | If I get if I get fifty one percent of the people to say that. Ah we should be able to Rob and rape the other forty nine then it's legal to do So is that fucking insanity or what like that's crazy. |
| 54:19.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well. Ah, my buddy who has probably more racial ethnicities in his background than anyone I know he's he's as as mud as they come. You know he says ah and I quote him because he he can speak on this. Like the greatest minority on the planet is the individual and in a democracy. The individual is not honored at all democracy and and communism have more alike than a Republic and and democracy and So. Ah,, there's yeah. |
| 54:59.51 | Max Shank | That's where all the evil stuff happens too like people are like oh jeffrey dahmer he's so it's like like yeah sometimes that happens but we know him way more and nobody talks about like chairman mao and stalin and Mussolini and all these fucking that racked up. Way bigger numbers I mean if we're really to yeah I think a hundred million under mal okay like. |
| 55:18.15 | mikebledsoe | Millions tens of millions of people more more people have died under Royalty Royal commands and communist demands than any other no other individual has ever. Caused more harm than people who are in charge of Communist countries. |
| 55:39.28 | Max Shank | Right? Because there's no um, agile rebalancing you know when you're able to vote with free choice a you're not gonna have interactions that are net loss you and I would only choose to do business if. What I have is worth it to you is worth at least a little more than what you pay so when you have a society that's based on win-win or profit. Um, you can rebalance you have that agility. So there's going to be um that the food supply. For example, you're not going to have some central planner make a mistake about how much food there should be because there's gonna be opportunity for people to choose lots of different foods and there will be this. Competition and collaboration and um I think that's 1 of the most important things is that we're allowed to rebalance and vote with our dollars I mean look we could go down a deep rabbit hole about how the fed has really fucked up the. Value of money through quantative quantitative easing which is just a really finesse way of saying like we're fucking with the currency. Um, but look the reality is if you're free to choose. That's great and if you're forced to obey that's usually not great and I don't want to make such a ah broad generalization. But the whole reason we have free speech as amendment 1 and um, use of violence or right to bear arms. Number 2 is because those are the only ways that we can interact with each other to resolve conflict we can resolve conflict with our words or we can resolve them with violence and of course we would preserve to do it without. Ah. Physical violence. But sometimes there's no other choice and that's why that's baked into this idea of individual freedom. |
| 57:53.69 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and I I think we would we We have to mention I mean now that we're down this track if we're we have to talk about ah capitalism and so ah to me. Ah. |
| 58:05.67 | Max Shank | Stop. Um I I Wish we I wish we had capitalism in this country? Cronyism um. |
| 58:12.50 | mikebledsoe | Decentralization I Wish we did too. Yeah, but we have um I don't know if this is I don't I don't know if we have like the greatest expression of capitalism Currently there is and we do have cronyism. |
| 58:24.28 | Max Shank | No, we have cronyism. It's horrific. We have we have lobbying we have all of these special. It's fucking look. It's It's not the worst but it's really deviated a lot from the concept of what capitalism should be. |
| 58:40.22 | mikebledsoe | Well the the concept of capitalism in its purest form has never been. You know the only time this existed is when probably in the old west when the the reach of government really couldn't get out and. Impact people's lives in say Nevada I mean ah I read Mark twain's autobiography and he traveled all over he he seemed to be fairly unfettered by anybody to do any business that he he would like to do um and paid no tax. So he um so I think that. |
| 59:02.11 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 59:17.93 | mikebledsoe | If we like zoom out on a macro scale. This idea of capitalism like it's always existed to some degree anytime. There's an exchange of services and goods in an exchange of value for those things that's ah, that's a capitalist endeavor when when choice is involved. Where where it's a voluntary and interaction and and pure capitalism like you're like you're alluding to is is where there is no. Ah there is no friction between voluntary interaction. There is no force. There is no coercion being brought in by a third party ah, third party butting their nose and say you're and my business so to voluntary adults creating an exchange if you read it's voluntary. This is what this is all of this is getting down to and. |
| 01:00:05.75 | Max Shank | That's the key word is voluntary. That's the key word. |
| 01:00:13.90 | mikebledsoe | There's a really awesome series I Bet you've watched it ah which is called ah, free to choose or freedom to choose by Milton friedman. It's free on youtube milton friedman ah he does he does such a good job of talking about. |
| 01:00:19.38 | Max Shank | Fuck. Yeah I've seen it. It's free on Youtube folks thomas souls on there too. |
| 01:00:31.80 | mikebledsoe | How Capitalism has led to the point where we have all this innovation like it's what's responsible for the ability to have all the goods and services that we have at our disposal now. Um, no thanks to government regulation. The thing about Capitalism I Think about Capitalism and there's been times where it's exploded and there's times where it's It's been retracted I think we're in a ah phase of Contraction. We're contracting on capitalism right now for various reasons and and I think yeah. |
| 01:01:04.33 | Max Shank | Fear I believe isn't that the only way that freedom gets eroded is through fear I'm pretty sure. |
| 01:01:08.66 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, so fear is doing that. But if we think about capitalism what it creates if you look at what Milton friedman describes in that in that series is It's really a decentralization of authority. So. The more voluntary interactions that we have in the world the more the individual gets to practice their own authority that they are the authority of their own life. Um I call that sovereignty if you if you have sovereignty that means that you are the authority of yourself and. And Sovereignty being a word that only used to be used according to royalty because they were the ones that were above the law right? They they could basically break all the laws and nothing happened to them and there were sovereignty with yeah exactly and so like the idea of sovereignty. |
| 01:01:48.72 | Max Shank | Ah, right? like. |
| 01:01:54.99 | Max Shank | Right? Kind of like our politicians now. |
| 01:02:03.10 | mikebledsoe | Ah, individual Sovereignty was something that was also ah very at the forefront of the forming of the republic of the United states and when the declaration of independence was drafted the constitution a lot of this was based on individual sovereignty as a. A philosophical backbone and so capitalism is something that has to exist in a free society because it is the epitome of voluntary interaction and you can tell if something is is capitalist or not because what max was saying at the beginning. But we have is cronyism or crony capitalism and there really isn't there. There are companies that are leveraging the government and to use violence and coercion. Ah you know disguised as in the words of regulation um to. Ah, basically force companies out or or force companies to do things a certain way. It. It creates a lot of involuntary behavior and when we have involuntary behavior that creates conflict and so if we want to have a a world of peace and without conflict then we. We really need people to to practice their own authority over themselves and realize that they are um, they are their their own ruler. So um, and which brings me to like anarchy the word anarchy all it means is without a ruler. |
| 01:03:33.95 | Max Shank | A. |
| 01:03:35.84 | mikebledsoe | And a lot of people you know Anarchy has been associated with with chaos. Ah, and it's a really good propaganda play to associate anarchy with chaos because most people have been tricked into believing that humans are evil. |
| 01:03:40.55 | Max Shank | Have. Right. |
| 01:03:55.77 | mikebledsoe | And that they they want to be violent and that you need to be made safe by somebody else when the truth is is most people are peaceful loving just want to get along I don't want to pick a fight most people will avoid those situations. |
| 01:04:09.28 | Max Shank | The chance of killing yourself versus someone else killing you is like a Hundred times more because there are different like even just pure like suicide outpaces murder by such a dramatic amount. It's like. |
| 01:04:27.64 | mikebledsoe | M. |
| 01:04:28.41 | Max Shank | 4 times or something like that. Maybe even more maybe 8 times people kill themselves way more than they kill other people. So This idea that your neighbor is dangerous is the only argument that can be made to take away. That sovereignty and it's like we talked about you know people who trade freedom for security will lose both and deserve neither. |
| 01:04:52.78 | mikebledsoe | Well I'll also say no 1 can take away your sovereignty like you are a sovereign being you do have the authority of your own life. If and if anyone else has authority over you. It's because you gave it to them now if. |
| 01:05:02.35 | Max Shank | What and there are consequences Totally no. |
| 01:05:09.87 | mikebledsoe | If you do something and someone who says that they're the authority over you they come and cause violence on you. That's an amoral action and so that's something that most people just won't be able to wrap their heads around and that's okay, but ah because. Most people are brainwashed into believing that you know the government or what they deem to be the Authority really is looking out for their best interest even if they make a mistake the overall. Ah the overall idea of it is beneficial. |
| 01:05:44.45 | Max Shank | I Think part of the reason for that is once you realize the opposite it like shatters your illusion of reality so it is so ah surreal it. It is a reality shattering experience to recognize the fact that oh. |
| 01:05:46.18 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 01:06:03.76 | Max Shank | Wow 12 years of school is a really bad investment for a child. Oh Wow look at how the tax dollars are squandered Oh Wow Look how many soldiers have been sacrificed in fucking Pointless Wars Oh Wow look at all these politicians flexing their power and taking away our freedom so they can grease their own pockets. Oh and it just goes On. And on and on and on and people like oh well, the media wouldn't lie to you and the reason they the reason. Yeah exactly Well. The reason people don't do that is because you have to like shatter your previous comfortable version of reality. Even if it is. |
| 01:06:27.91 | mikebledsoe | Um, the media is just 1 big advertisement. |
| 01:06:42.42 | Max Shank | Even if it's wrong. It's familiar so you can keep your ego intact if you're just like no no, no, they they know what's best they're doing What's best for everybody and you know a lot of the time. It's just impossible to say after the fact but I feel like we've gotten a little too far down. |
| 01:06:45.80 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:07:01.63 | Max Shank | Or maybe just appropriately far down the rabbit hole of ah choice within a societal framework or within the state. But I think we can easily bring it back around and kind of. |
| 01:07:10.42 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 01:07:19.64 | Max Shank | Wrap up the idea that if you are what you said earlier really resonated if you figure out who you want to serve just ask them like if you're not sure what to do just ask the people that you want to help. And they'll tell you what they want, you know what? I mean like then you're you're very likely to make the right make a constructive choice. |
| 01:07:40.56 | mikebledsoe | Yep, like. |
| 01:07:45.49 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, spot on spot on. That's that's the 1 of the biggest things that ah that I teach is if you're ever confused about what to do next go ask your clients. Go ask your potential clients. |
| 01:07:49.37 | Max Shank | I think. |
| 01:08:02.74 | mikebledsoe | And ideal customer. |
| 01:08:05.12 | Max Shank | It's kind of like you know you and I tend to resonate with male entrepreneurs around 30 years old for obvious reasons like I understand it I don't understand women I've tried to I've done a lot of I've done a lot of work in the field. |
| 01:08:10.37 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, like. |
| 01:08:22.10 | Max Shank | Trying to understand women but I'm still pretty confused. |
| 01:08:24.89 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that's that's a code yet to be cracked and I think it's not supposed to be cracked because it's ah the the mystery is a big part of the attraction in my opinion. Yeah. |
| 01:08:37.60 | Max Shank | Yeah, we we like things that are different but familiar wasn't that weird. |
| 01:08:44.52 | mikebledsoe | What let's close this down any ah, any final thoughts on this. |
| 01:08:51.20 | Max Shank | Final thoughts on how to choose better take a pause. Be aware of the so you take a pause then you are able to use your wizard brain Once you take a pause Then. You will likely get trapped by logical fallacies If you're not aware of what they are and if you're not sure what to do? Um, just try to make your choices align with the identity and the purpose that you want not necessarily the 1 that you have. Because your subconscious self-image can lead you toward the same life. You've always been living but of course the whole idea is to let go of that so you can make room for a new and better 1 and then. Once you make a choice. Don't be afraid to quit if it's wrong. But Also once you make a choice make sure you give it a chance to actually work so really test it out in the field and the other thing I would say last but maybe not least is. |
| 01:09:56.12 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:10:08.14 | Max Shank | If We're talking about a choice for Business. You have no clue and people will lie to you until you offer it up for sale whether it's a service or a product or anything like that if you're like hey I got this thing and you tell your friend they're like oh that's really cool. No no, don't ask their opinion. Ask if they want to purchase it like that. That's what really ah tells the story. |
| 01:10:33.37 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, just no skin in the gain with an opinion. Ah yet. |
| 01:10:38.10 | Max Shank | No skin in the game. We've been talking shit for an hour. No skin. It's easy to talk. It is cheap. |
| 01:10:44.98 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, that's why I say talk is cheap. Ah yeah I yeah I'd say like the big takeaways from me that I'd like people to leave with is um, you know. You can you can choose. You can get better at choosing now in the moment by learning to downregulate yourself. Ah when when faced with something that's stressful and you can also choose in the past or you can choose in the present the train for the future by ah, training yourself. To acquire skills that you you imagine you might need in the future like you might need to acquire the skill of taking a gun out of a holster and shooting a piece of paper that may be something else down the road but the going from unconscious incompetence looking at the area of your life where you want to make improvements. And looking at where you're incompetent and then choosing the the number 1 thing that you want to do and then train that with conscious incompetence be okay with being incompetent. It's something that you're trying to get good at and then watching yourself go into conscious competence and then getting the point of making it. Ah, unconscious competence and if you really take that perspective when you when you step into learning I find when I did that that I I started learning a lot faster because it was kind of strange the more patience I had with myself in realizing where I was at in the process. Allowed me to down regulate which allowed me to learn more quickly and then the last thing I want to mention is a lot of the principles that we talk about are happening on an individual level and according to 1 of the hermetic principles as above so below as within. Is without and basically what that means is whatever' is happening in this context and what I mean right now is whatever is happening for someone on an individual level psychologically the way they approach things is the same you're going to see the same manifestations happen in large groups of people in society whether it be. |
| 01:12:51.47 | Max Shank | A. |
| 01:12:53.99 | mikebledsoe | Ah, school City or an entire nation or the whole world. There are pieces of this individual psychology that applies culturally and so when you learn ah when when you learn 1 really deeply when you go to connect the dots to the other. It. It makes a lot of sense So worth paying attention to so if you're ever confused about why an entire society is behaving a certain way I'll just look at why individuals behave that way when when they're left to their own devices. So. |
| 01:13:25.78 | Max Shank | Oh man, that's good. It made me think of 2 more things actually which I think are really important 1 is that you can choose now about the past so framing your experience might be the most important choice you ever make. Because if you frame your experience as 1 of gratitude rather than 1 of resentment or victimhood then you are basically dooming your future based on your past. So I think that's 1 of the most common problems I see people have when they continue to make choices that are self-destructive is. They have not framed their experience in a constructive way. You know if you were beaten as a child and you say oh I'm a beaten victim versus I was beaten as a child clearly my parent wanted. What's best for me and clearly they cared about me. They just didn't really have a good way of showing it and regardless of all that it made me the person that I am today so framing your past is a very important choice that is worth putting on paper and that leads to the second thing which is your state of being. Physically and mentally will strongly influence your ability to make decisions. So if you are seeing the world with abundance. Mentally if you are um, exercising regularly if you have adequate blood flow. You're going to make better choices if you are stagnant. Your chi your blood All that stuff is stagnant. You're going to make worse choices that are more contractive and so I think between the choice of framing your past and your present to help your future and also changing your state. Can be crazy beneficial and sometimes it's better to sleep on it before you make a decision sometimes better to go for a walk or run because your state of being will heavily influence your ability to make a choice. |
| 01:15:27.98 | mikebledsoe | Absolutely Ah, anything you want to mention besides Maxsank Dot Com for finding you. |
| 01:15:38.20 | Max Shank | Yep Maxsank Dot Com and if you'd like to outsource all of your decision makingking to me I would be happy to enroll you in my Authoritarian program. You don't need to worry about choosing for yourself anymore I will just assume all your earthly possessions and I'll I'll tell you what to do from here on out. |
| 01:15:55.40 | mikebledsoe | Ah, perfect. 1 thing I want to mention by the way I've been getting messages from people that they're listening and enjoying it so I want to let all the people that are listening know that I have the strong coach summit coming up in March. |
| 01:15:55.51 | Max Shank | So. |
| 01:16:12.49 | mikebledsoe | And so if you want to check that out. Go to the strongcoach dot com slash summit or you can just hit me up on Instagram I'll give you the link so just want to let you all know about that so that you don't find out about too late and then you're mad that I didn't mention on the show and then. You know people get upset with me a lot. So. |
| 01:16:29.65 | Max Shank | By the way I was just joking I ain't your mom I don't want to make your choices for you. |
| 01:16:35.34 | mikebledsoe | Ah, it's like a fake plug in front of ah, a real plug and it's like ah ah all right? Good show. Let me brother. |
| 01:16:44.48 | Max Shank | Love your brother take care. |
| 00:00.00 | mikebledsoe | Welcome back to Mondays with mike and max and help'm coming to you from mephis tennessee I went I went home for thanksgiving and that's where I'm hanging out where you at Max you're still a home I can tell on the camera. |
| 00:14.98 | Max Shank | Yeah I'm home I'm home in ents need is California. It's pretty nice here. It's winter time but I still get to go on walks with no shirt on so it's great. The sun goes down probably around four 30 I want to say. |
| 00:25.25 | mikebledsoe | The sun just goes down earlier. |
| 00:32.30 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, I Ah um. |
| 00:34.23 | Max Shank | 35 very exciting. We're talking about the weather this is good. The the pleasant treat. Why don't you tell the folks at home. What the weather's like over there. |
| 00:41.54 | mikebledsoe | Well this is this is what happens when you master a life of ah of ah balance and get rid of all all excess the weather becomes interesting in the sun Sunset time becomes interesting. |
| 00:55.61 | Max Shank | Spare spare me your inane platitudes. Let's get down to business. |
| 01:01.77 | mikebledsoe | ah ah yeah so we do ah we want to talk about excess today. Um, and you know max and I have both experienced a lot of excess in our lives and there's a lot of benefits to it. But there's also some pitfalls and ah. We're going to dig into what those may be and how to what you can do to navigate these waters of life because I do think that we're all drawn to excess in some ways. What are some of the what are some of the ways you were drawn to excess. And your in your youth max. |
| 01:38.94 | Max Shank | Oh gosh I think it's important to have a distinction between surplus and excess which seems very similar. So for me I just always wanted a surplus of cash and. Like everybody else I wanted to be loved so I wanted love power and attention in that order which is something we've talked about a lot and I think having a surplus is a natural inclination for people. That's why. People set up retirement accounts. That's why they have a savings account That's why they get married so they can lock in their relationship and you know with excess you might eat too much food I mean I definitely did that. When I was a kid and still I just exercise enough that it doesn't matter so I'm not really overweight but when I was a kid I was fat and it was because I just ate too much food I consumed too much television and later too much video games and then. Um, it's it's just an over concentration or an imbalance in 1 area and I think it's really common because the only way you can improve your situation is to increase your means which is get more. You can reduce your needs which is needless or you can change your attitude about it and those are really the only 3 ways that I think you can improve your situation so I was hyper focused on increasing my means which is gaining more power. And early on I really just was so focused on getting more and spending less because I was living a very Spartan existence and is because I was very focused on building up that Surplus so I would eventually feel. Secure financially because that was probably the biggest insecurity I felt when I was young younger I guess. |
| 03:55.53 | mikebledsoe | Well, what? what was? Ah, What was some of the things that you were that was you build up a surplus but what what did you experience in excess I Mean well you talked about food ah video games all these types of things. Did you experience. Um, excess and fitness or anything like that. |
| 04:17.24 | Max Shank | Oh yeah, Absolutely um, crazy excess and it was because it was so positively reinforced right? people. We think we've talked about this before I would do a strong thing and people like oh yeah, we we really love it when you do this strong thing and in my head I'm like okay so this is how I get love now is I do a strong thing and then I just layer more and more on top of that without really pausing to think about the big picture. |
| 04:36.14 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 04:47.39 | Max Shank | Of the life I'm trying to live So I think I was excessively concerned with how I appeared to others and that probably drove a lot of the destructive behaviors. |
| 05:00.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think um I mean when when we first brought this up what I thought of was excess leads to being desensitized and putting ourselves like in extreme situations. |
| 05:12.65 | Max Shank | Um, what. |
| 05:20.94 | mikebledsoe | Repeatedly over time will desensitize us so ah, exposing yourself to extreme amounts of sugar over a period of time will desensitize your your cells to insulin and your ability to produce insulin may be reduced. Um. And you stare at the sun too long in excess your eyes will become desensitized to be ah ability to sense light and so I think that I think and then the the first thing that really came up to this I think what led to this was the talk about porn. |
| 05:58.39 | Max Shank | No. |
| 06:00.16 | mikebledsoe | And how porn can is porn in itself to me I've gotten to the point where just any porn at all seems excessive around Sexuality. So I mean if I want to say excessive. You know there's there's porn and then there's excessive porn. I'm sure it can be consumed in a way that is beneficial or helpful or maybe not so bad. But if we look at if we zoom out and look at the the whole picture of sex I think consuming porn does lead to a desensitizing of. Men and women alike I think men are more susceptible to it. Ah get deep. They get desensitized to ah just what they think a sexual experience should look like the you know. |
| 06:39.93 | Max Shank | Less imagination too. |
| 06:53.21 | mikebledsoe | You're more than likely not going to be picking up that girl that looks like the porn star you were looking at Yesterday. Ah you know, ah that you were saying ah you know the volleyball team's not going to just you know? Yeah yeah, like. |
| 07:03.30 | Max Shank | Wander into my sex dungeon. Yeah, exactly like it's just very unrealistic expectations and pornography is interesting because there's no clear definition of what it is like we don't know what it is just the same the same thing with ah addiction. We have ideas of what it is addiction. You could say is a repeated behavior that gives you an outcome that you don't want right? that could be 1 definition but there's a lot of dissent There's a lot of disagreement. About what addiction really means there's a lot of disagreement about what porn really means because I don't know if you've ever checked out the fitness hashtag on Instagram that that is like soft core pornography like that that'll get me going. No worries now. |
| 07:57.16 | mikebledsoe | That's true. Well yeah I've had ah I've had to unfollow so many people because ah I don't have the problem now because I I put a stop to it. But yeah, there's I'm on Instagram I'm following this girl and then next thing I know I'm like. |
| 07:59.93 | Max Shank | Back in my heyday. |
| 08:12.13 | mikebledsoe | Oh shit, you know I got to go finish this. It leads it leads me next thing I know I'm I'm porn up you know. |
| 08:17.71 | Max Shank | Well like you said there's a way to appreciate visual and audible stimuli. In a constructive way and there's also the shameful slow destruction of your soul as you just watch like more and more depraved stuff and frankly you know I'm not into kink shaming. You know some people really like um pottery. And some people like hooking their nipples up to a car battery and it's not for me to say which of those is like the best way to spend your leisure Time. You know what? I mean if you like what like who could who can say what you do with your leisure. But. |
| 09:09.30 | mikebledsoe | I'm with you? Well I I would say this that the longer I go without porn the more interesting My actual sex life becomes. |
| 09:16.70 | Max Shank | And I mean I don't know if you still whack off. But if you use your imagination for that. It's kind of like you're you're flexing a muscle a little bit practice practicing your imagination. |
| 09:27.77 | mikebledsoe | What do you mean flexing what flexing ah flat flexing the imagination muscle. |
| 09:34.22 | Max Shank | Yeah, exactly so rather than being dependent on this stimulus that you may or may not feel shame about and once again, like you said it's just a ah slippery slope into something that is more and more stimulating just the same way that serial. Has become more and more sugary where it started out as like oh it's honey Nut cheerios. We're going to put like a little sprinkle of honey in there and people are like yeah and then before you know it, we got cookie crisp which is a bowl of tiny cookies like how the fuck did that become cereal. |
| 09:59.60 | mikebledsoe | Oh. |
| 10:09.37 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 10:11.74 | Max Shank | And it's just like ah it's an arms race and excess is what kills most people in America there's no question about it. Excess food creates stagnation. You never have time to clear out all of the um. Energy all the sugar or the Metabolites. So the byproducts of these reactions and um excess I refer to the creation consumption ratio. So if your creation consumption ratio is just wildly out of balance. You're not going to feel a lot of authority over your own life and that's what's so fun is the word authority has the word author right in the middle there. So the more time you practice being an author. Rather than a reader you're going to feel more agency over your life too. Otherwise you're going to just be fully addicted to the dopamine machine and it sort of doesn't matter what lever you're pulling whether it's a porn lever or. A social media lever or ah, different consumable drugs. You know it's it's hard to say what's going to be more destructive for a person. Um, you're probably better off having. Ah, few cocktails every single night then spending many hours scrolling through social media and getting into the excessive comparison because now it's like if I compare my professional success and aesthetic appearance to dwayne the rock johnson. Just going to feel like ah a pile of shit every day I'm going to feel so far behind the 8 ball I'm like what am I doing but it's not natural to compare yourself against the top fraction of a percentage of mutants. Of 7 billion like it just it just makes no sense so you get in that comparison. |
| 12:24.41 | mikebledsoe | Well, you're also comparing yourself to you know photo shoots and best days you like I'm not I don't when I'm having a down day I'm not posting the fucking Instagram I'm not I'm not posting the the 7 hours I sat at my desk and ran. |
| 12:30.76 | Max Shank | Yeah, all that stuff. |
| 12:44.35 | mikebledsoe | Ran numbers to talk about. You know how cool entrepreneurship is I wait until I wait I mean I Even even I'm someone who tries to like be as real as possible on on social media. |
| 12:46.45 | Max Shank | We We should do that We should do a whole series of like the lowest moments he ah ah. |
| 13:02.50 | mikebledsoe | And I still like it's like oh yeah, I've rented this dope car and I'm driving across these cliffs and this is what entrepreneurship looks like but you know there was also 5 other days. Yeah everything I got paid for it. |
| 13:08.61 | Max Shank | That was all I did that was all I did I It was fully curated I Only showed you a specific angle of snapshots of my let the best ones too and people. We're under this idea that I was just racking up. W's every single day like it couldn't be easier I'm like doing all this amazing stuff man his whole life must be like that. It's like are you kidding me. |
| 13:38.66 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, or it's like a lot of people will go man. You're doing so many things I'm like well I'm involved with a lot of things I'm not actually doing a lot of things. Ah but I could see how that looks like it when you when you're looking online. |
| 13:55.44 | Max Shank | Well oh. |
| 13:56.93 | mikebledsoe | And yeah, you're comparing yourself to my online image again. It's yeah it won't be helpful but I like what you're saying the excess comparison because I mean avoiding comparison Altogether that's that's difficult. But. |
| 14:03.19 | Max Shank | Yeah, conversely. |
| 14:14.80 | mikebledsoe | Social media has created an experience where excess comparison is very easy and you are you are comparing yourself to the best on the planet I mean the benefit of the internet is that look when I have kids I'm not just having them learn from any math teacher. |
| 14:19.63 | Max Shank | Yeah, oh. |
| 14:33.93 | mikebledsoe | Um, probably gonna enroll them in the khan academy which is absolutely free online. Ah and have 1 of the world's best mathematics teachers teach them. It makes sense but the flip side of that is is that the excess comparison. It also is made available. |
| 14:36.19 | Max Shank | And. |
| 14:51.76 | mikebledsoe | And comparing ourselves against people who are the best in the world at a thing. |
| 14:55.58 | Max Shank | That's what allows us to do better. Um, it's kind of like the 4 minute mile. No 1 could break it no 1 could break it 1 guy broke it. He showed it was possible and because news traveled so fast. Everyone's like oh man so that's how it works. |
| 15:00.12 | mikebledsoe | M. |
| 15:12.28 | Max Shank | And the same thing's true with all kinds of stuff like you can watch hours and hours of fight film or sport film to really evaluate what the best in the world are doing I think the you know I tend to be my own harshest critic. Which is why I Also don't really care what people say because like I've already been as harsh as I can toward myself about the truth of what I'm doing well or not doing well and I think as long as you can do that in a like a kind way. |
| 15:42.23 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 15:49.72 | Max Shank | You can be kind to yourself. That's probably the best way to go about it. |
| 15:51.65 | mikebledsoe | Well I think what you're getting at what I'm hearing in all this is It's is long. You want to make sure that you're it's staying useful. So your comparison can be useful ah and and pushing you forward. |
| 16:09.74 | Max Shank | Discernment. |
| 16:10.67 | mikebledsoe | It's probably not going to create a lot of joy for you but it may create. Ah it may create drive and for for accomplishment and and whatever the things that we tend to value as ah westerners. Anyway. |
| 16:17.50 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 16:23.84 | Max Shank | I think you want to have discernment um with regard to actions rather judgment of the person and I think that would be best applied to yourself and to other people like if you. Safe something stupid which I mean I think that's happened a few times on the podcast already. Not today maybe also today I'm not saying that you're a stupid person by by Judgment. You know what? I mean but. |
| 16:55.84 | mikebledsoe | M. |
| 16:58.43 | Max Shank | Just the same way I would think that oh I said a stupid thing I wouldn't judge myself as stupid because of that you know I'm saying so it's really important you have to be discerning Otherwise you're you're like living in fantasy land and you're never evaluating behavior so you never have a chance to learn. |
| 17:02.81 | mikebledsoe | Um, well yeah, there's um. |
| 17:14.71 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's a gift I What I mean recording my my thoughts and then putting them online for everybody to hear talk about a personal development tool I Almost every show I leave saying you know what. |
| 17:31.52 | Max Shank | So just. |
| 17:32.25 | mikebledsoe | I'm not even sure I Really believe that thing I said or or what I said man, there's so many holes in that I haven't really I really haven't thought about it from every angle. So I like talking to somebody else on a podcast and they can poke holes and I go Wow I was running around. |
| 17:43.62 | Max Shank | And here. |
| 17:51.34 | mikebledsoe | I Actually haven't thought this all the way through or from from as many angles as I would like to if I'm going to speak about it and so ah, ah I Invest a lot of time in learning because I don't want to be. Ah, hate being wrong like people that's 1 of the things that most people almost nobody want ah as like ah the biggest 1 of the biggest fears of people is to be wrong. So with the the problem is is most people they don't want to be wrong. So bad that they'll just dig in and and. |
| 18:10.00 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 18:28.92 | mikebledsoe | Ignore any information that is going to challenge their confirmation. Bias. |
| 18:34.37 | Max Shank | They'll create a fantasy that makes their wrongness right. |
| 18:36.56 | mikebledsoe | Right? But on the other side of that like I'm I don't want to be wrong. So I got to make sure that what I say is the right thing versus trying to make the thing that I believe the right thing and convince people of it and I don't think there's any way. |
| 18:45.10 | Max Shank | And. Right. |
| 18:54.62 | mikebledsoe | You know where human nature is to do a little bit of both but there is there are some people who are really far on 1 side and then there's other people who are really putting forth conscious effort to to do it in a way that's that's actually useful and I think it's obvious when you run into those people. Because when you get talking to them. They they're what they're talking about is well fortified with with things that are hard to disagree with. |
| 19:21.21 | Max Shank | I agree complete that's part of why I like our conversation so much is we get to test out our ideas against someone who is fairly objective but also pretty kind about it so you don't feel like we're in a dangerous place. We're going to judge each other personally which it feels safe to me like I don't go fuck. Ah, what's interesting. You mentioned before whenever I've released anything. |
| 19:41.25 | mikebledsoe | It's a safe space. |
| 19:54.66 | Max Shank | Whenever I've finished a podcast whenever I've finished and sent out a book whenever I've completed a course I've never come away thinking that was perfect. My very first response is like going through an inventory. All the stuff that I messed up all the stuff that I wish I had done differently. What I wish I had included what I wish I had excluded and I think that's a big part of what makes you better. It can go too far though. So. |
| 20:27.36 | mikebledsoe | Well this is this I mean I I teach people how to do this most people are so afraid of looking bad that and looking like they're wrong that they they won't ever launch their their coaching program or their course. |
| 20:43.60 | Max Shank | Man. |
| 20:46.21 | mikebledsoe | Or whatever it is and I think 1 of the benefits that I've had I imagine you're similar in this way because I I know this is just um, ah an attribute that a lot of successful people have is it's 80 percent good enough. So I'm going to launch it and so I think. |
| 21:00.20 | Max Shank | Um, right. |
| 21:04.57 | mikebledsoe | Most people and whether it's 1 hundred percent or 80 percent is likely a feeling because there's too many variables to be able to say you know you either feel like it's right or you feel like it's not. It's it's hard to come up with objective. Um, ah. |
| 21:12.23 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 21:23.60 | mikebledsoe | An objective measure of the quality of a content or whatever, especially when it's coming from yourself. So so what I like is like look get it 80 percent there as soon as it feels like 80 percent launch it. But after that continue to improve it. There's no reason to just. |
| 21:25.58 | Max Shank | I Think that. |
| 21:41.68 | mikebledsoe | Let it be but don't not launch it until you know, don't wait till it 1 hundred percent to launch. It. So like I spent the last ten months rewriting all the curriculum for the strong coach and it it is much much better, much much better for having done that. But I will finish the upgrade by the end of the year so I will have spent 1 year upgrading the content and I won't need to teach touch it for 2 or 3 now that I've done it to this degree? yeah. |
| 22:14.89 | Max Shank | Unless you learn something new wishful which will likely happen and I think that's part of the reason that's part of the reason I bring it up too because. |
| 22:21.50 | mikebledsoe | Definitely gonna happen. but but I even wait I will learn something new I won't I won't go in there and change it immediately. All I'll wait 6 months I want to I want to learn like 3 new things before I go and update all my curriculum because it changes. |
| 22:26.72 | Max Shank | Great. |
| 22:33.53 | Max Shank | Right? You don't need to have a third edition just because you learned 1 new paragraph I think the reason I bring this up is people get the idea that my stuff is like really good. |
| 22:38.49 | mikebledsoe | Oh. |
| 22:51.65 | Max Shank | The courses, the books, the videos the podcasts that I do um but the reality is I've never felt like perfectly happy with it once I've let it out there so kind of just know that going in. That you're not going to be like oh now it's perfectly ready and don't don't buy into this fantasy that once you do launch it that you're gonna be like ah Perfect. It's It's exactly perfect I'll never need to look back at that Again. So So don't kid yourself into thinking. It's gonna work out. Exactly Perfect. You will think of things that you wish you had done differently and that's just the nature of how it goes even when things on paper go crazy good like thousands of buyers. Ah you know, basically no refunds. |
| 23:47.80 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 23:47.64 | Max Shank | That kind of thing. |
| 23:57.72 | Max Shank | Some excessive silence here for a podcast. |
| 24:03.17 | mikebledsoe | Ah I mean if you don't if you don't remember it it. Ah I got the software set up to cut out the the long pauses. |
| 24:08.78 | Max Shank | Oh not I Remember. So what do you think? excess food from here. |
| 24:19.33 | mikebledsoe | Well, you know I I um I wanted to circle back on something you said earlier which is being the the author you know Authority has the word author in it and I think that there is a. |
| 24:28.82 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 24:38.74 | mikebledsoe | Ah, in excess of outsourcing your authority and when I think about author I mean 1 1 way people could look at it is. You're the author of the story of your life that seems a bit conceptual I like it. But. |
| 24:54.26 | Max Shank | I Want man. |
| 24:56.80 | mikebledsoe | It's it. You know when you say that to someone like oh yeah, yeah, I'm the author of my life. But. |
| 25:00.23 | Max Shank | Well, you get to put this you You are the spin doctor. You are the propagandist of your own life. You know So I think it is. It's the frame of the picture right? You remember things a certain way. But that's based on how you color. |
| 25:07.44 | mikebledsoe | Totally. |
| 25:17.78 | mikebledsoe | Well, this is what I want to point out is that what does an author do an author just doesn't tell stories an author writes they take pen to paper or they they type word and they write the story out and. |
| 25:18.54 | Max Shank | Those experiences right. |
| 25:30.62 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 25:37.28 | mikebledsoe | Ah, most people don't take the time to write out their story. They'll dream up their story and from what I can tell is if you leave your authorship up to just what's happening in your own mind and you're not. |
| 25:41.14 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 25:54.62 | mikebledsoe | Putting a lot of symbols outside of yourself by you know, writing then you're going to be more subject to other people's authorship. You're going to be more susceptible outside Authority because the the you know who who? ah. |
| 26:05.49 | Max Shank | Totally. |
| 26:14.30 | mikebledsoe | Are the best best authors on the planet that they they their their authorship creates the most power they have the most power as authors. |
| 26:17.10 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 26:24.43 | Max Shank | Um, I would say either lawyers or ah, the media people who are yeah. |
| 26:30.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah Lawyers I would say lawyers because they they will write something down. They'll create a law and then people will have to follow it. Not only that they convince these these lawmakers slash policymakers they convinced these these police. These policy enforcers to be willing to kill people in order to enforce this law that they authored they authored it out of opinion. They wrote it down and then they convinced a ah segment of the population. |
| 26:56.75 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 27:07.69 | mikebledsoe | That it's okay for them to go out there and enforce this on enforce other people. |
| 27:08.32 | Max Shank | And that's where the media comes into play right? because they need to um, put it to a vote in the court of public opinion for people to have a positive frame of mind around it in order for it to to get through. |
| 27:21.56 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well, that's how they that's how you got to let people know about the laws you got to let them know about it somehow and the the news is here just to inform you about what is and ah. |
| 27:25.75 | Max Shank | Right? Because they're moonline. |
| 27:34.30 | Max Shank | I Know you don't believe that but it just sounds so chilling anyway. |
| 27:41.82 | mikebledsoe | Ah, so it's um, so. |
| 27:44.48 | Max Shank | The news is to get you to think not only a certain way but it's to distract you from thinking about a different way and that's that's probably the worst part about it is. There's an excess of data points. You know. |
| 27:52.43 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 28:01.59 | Max Shank | We're basically fixed on what we can focus on and every day there's something new and it's tugging at your emotions and the people get played like a fiddle. So I don't give any credence to what people believe I understand that they might feel a certain way. But the fact of the matter is that people are are told what to think about and that is actually maybe even more sinister than being told what to think it's like hey this happened so you should think this way about it like the the main thing is hey everyone think about this today. Everyone think about this today hey think about 1 dude who died in a state that you don't live in. You're like wait. What like that's what we're talking about that's what everyone is talking about that is insanity. |
| 28:52.26 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the amount of focus that they're able to bring so many people's awareness into into a single focus while while the entire world. There's other things happening and then only that bring your focus on something that actually doesn't matter to you. |
| 29:00.80 | Max Shank | Ah, hope. |
| 29:07.99 | Max Shank | And it's so it's excessive new things and it's excessive focus on things that don't really matter because if we were trying to think about what matters politically there are only 2 things that matter who's in charge and what's the extent of their authority and everything else is total bullshit. |
| 29:09.90 | mikebledsoe | It's not impacting your life. |
| 29:27.52 | Max Shank | I would feel really comfortable arguing that point with just about anybody quite frankly, but all of these other little little nitpicky things like doesn't matter. It's just ah, an illusion. It's a smokescreen. It's a distraction. It's misdirection. |
| 29:30.33 | mikebledsoe | What. |
| 29:41.48 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well we have an think people are more susceptible I mean the propaganda is interesting because what we have like if you if you look at old propaganda people who wrote about propaganda decades ago. Um. There's 1 guy can't remember his name right now he said true propaganda can only exist in a country where ah like a place like North korea where they have total control over information. |
| 30:12.77 | Max Shank | What's the difference between propaganda and true propaganda I don't know you're saying the only place that true propaganda can exist is a place like North korea. |
| 30:15.69 | mikebledsoe | What do you mean? Oh true, but where where where they where they have absolute control over how you're gonna think what you're gonna think about oh we do? Well what I'm saying is like this was during a time where. |
| 30:27.44 | Max Shank | You don't think we have that in America you don't think that. |
| 30:35.65 | mikebledsoe | Um, where they were doing a lot of comparison I think this was like this is probably ah propaganda to get you to believe that communism is is worse. Um, which I think it is but the yeah exactly. |
| 30:37.18 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 30:49.15 | Max Shank | It's worse for everybody except the people in charge. |
| 30:53.62 | mikebledsoe | The did you know that Jackie chan is a communist. He's he's part of the ccp he is chinese yeah. |
| 30:58.40 | Max Shank | He's Chinese right? You got basically no choice I don't know what I don't know what he actually believes but the incentive to not be disappeared is probably pretty tremendous. So. |
| 31:03.22 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, but but but he but he but he could but he could have he? yeah. Ah. |
| 31:14.44 | Max Shank | Like if I were chinese guess what I would be a communist too like hey and and hey look just in case things go south. Yeah yeah, and just look just in in case things go south here in America I just want our soon to be overlords to know that I believed in them the whole time and I swear my fealty to you. |
| 31:18.85 | mikebledsoe | Ah, you'd be the best communist. |
| 31:34.33 | Max Shank | You know, whatever it takes look I Knew you guys could do it. Ah. |
| 31:34.42 | mikebledsoe | Um, I was over here. You know I was helping out over here the whole time you couldn't see it. But yeah. |
| 31:41.61 | Max Shank | If you compare to different parts of history like I don't know that that's the funny thing is there are um places in America where it's like really harsh to live and I was talking to someone the other day and they were talking to me. About my childhood and their face was 1 of like pity and sadness because they knew me growing up and they knew what my childhood was like and I don't think of it that way I think of I think of myself as like pretty lucky guy because I compare it to well. |
| 32:09.52 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 32:18.95 | Max Shank | You know there are some villages in Africa where twice a year they steal all the children you know like warlords just come in and steal all the children and and I'm thinking to myself. Yeah, like you know I wasn't so bad to to help out with the rent when I was twelve you know what I mean it's like it's. |
| 32:31.56 | mikebledsoe | Right? I mean yeah, a lot of people will say that's a yeah, well some people say that sad. But what's the long term benefit of that like who that that formed who you became yeah I was roofing houses when I was like 1213 |
| 32:36.12 | Max Shank | It's not so it's all what you compare to. |
| 32:40.82 | Max Shank | Who knows who knows it's too. It's too early to tell like the yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's like dude the the whole concept of like giving a ah like 6 year old the grade of an f right? like it's. Oh that kid's failing like we don't know what that kid's gonna grow up and do like we have no clue he his his head isn't even hard yet like he's still got a fucking soft skull like Jesus christ people like we we just try to you know we. |
| 33:03.58 | mikebledsoe | Bright. |
| 33:10.49 | mikebledsoe | That's not even are yeah. |
| 33:20.16 | Max Shank | Excessively Homogenize and that's why we always end up with a worse result and the more you allow people ah just trying to like push everybody into the same square mold because it fits better. |
| 33:25.54 | mikebledsoe | Can can you explain a homogenous what homogenized means for everybody. |
| 33:36.41 | Max Shank | Like that's what school does it teaches you to be obedient and to fit in not necessarily um how to live the best life for yourself. How to understand learning how to understand value versus values. |
| 33:50.62 | mikebledsoe | Well that there's an analogy to this would be ah say homogenized milk like the the milk that you go buy at the store you go to the grocery store in America and you go get the 2 percent or the whole milk. Whatever it is that's homogenized. |
| 33:55.21 | Max Shank | Exactly. |
| 34:01.54 | Max Shank | I hope. |
| 34:06.48 | mikebledsoe | That that milk was taken from a lot of the the same type of genetically modified cows and put into the 1 big vat and mixed all together. You're not getting. You're not getting milk from 1 specific cow and the homogenization that ah coupled with pasteurization which is trying to kill all the germs. |
| 34:13.40 | Max Shank | My. |
| 34:26.90 | mikebledsoe | Has basically made milk undigestible to so many most people. But if you if you what would be the opposite ah hetero Zeni is that or heterogenous. Horogen is out of ah, no, That's not the right word. Um, now that the the opposite of that being? Yeah yeah, individual variable um, is gonna create like my more biodiversity. |
| 34:47.59 | Max Shank | I Don't know probably just variable. Yeah different unique. |
| 35:00.76 | mikebledsoe | If you're consuming that milk it me I healthier So like I liked it and it might be but that whole huge vat might be poison too and the difference. |
| 35:02.70 | Max Shank | And it might be poisoned and it might be poisoned. True. But if you but if you boil it 10 times. It won't be and that's that's kind of the argument for trying to make things as safe as possible rather than as free as possible and that's an argument a lot of people. Ah. |
| 35:21.14 | mikebledsoe | Well should we talk about excess safety excess safety versus excess freedom. Ah. |
| 35:27.66 | Max Shank | Like. |
| 35:32.37 | mikebledsoe | Ah, Max has beaten his head against the microphone. |
| 35:38.32 | Max Shank | Out it that that's like I get it. We can think so far into the future that we're like. And need to get my four ah 1 k I need to get my ira I need to get married I need to do this I want to lock in and secure the future and we're so obsessed with that because we're manic paranoid fuckers and I understand the sensation because I also tend to take a. 30000 foot view and look at the big picture and try to project really far forward into the future. So I can avoid traps and also find the greatest treasures that will give me whatever I think will give me fulfillment even though fulfillment is probably more of an attitude. That you have here and now and just thanking your lucky stars that you made it this far but there is that quote that says people who trade freedom for security will lose both and deserve neither I think it is Benjamin franklin it might be Thomas jefferson but i. |
| 36:43.21 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean it's a Benjamin franklin. Yeah yeah, those get those guys were all writing a lot of letters to each other and those those are some very interesting letters. |
| 36:51.61 | Max Shank | It's 1 of those guys those. You know what's fascinating about that whole situation is right before the declaration of independence got signed like months before the vast majority of those guys had every intention to stay with England. And as I understand it it was because of Thomas paine writing common sense that flipped them over the edge and started getting them to think about what it's like to be the authority of your own life instead of accepting that authority from outside. |
| 37:27.28 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 37:34.50 | Max Shank | And if we want to talk about security or safety versus freedom I think it's important to recognize that weak people are going to be the most susceptible to that. Because not only will they accept whatever abuse their ah savior brings them. They will also feel justified in weakening their neighbors so that they will feel more safe. |
| 38:06.62 | mikebledsoe | Oh. |
| 38:09.38 | Max Shank | And and that's what's really sinister about it right? like it's 1 thing to be weak yourself, but it's another thing to vote to basically rape your neighbor because you are not strong enough yourself and that's why they they weaken people divide and conquer and people. Feel more fragmented less United. It's very very interesting. We could explore the psychology of that but it does just throw people right into. Ah the phrase limbic hijack. So you just get thrown into your lizard brain where all you care about is safety and you. Can't use your mammalian brain which is love and community or your neocortex which is big picture thinking and problem solving and that's that's 1 of the evils of the propaganda as it takes you out of your wizard. |
| 38:54.67 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 39:04.44 | Max Shank | Brain the neocortex and just pumps you into the lizard brain. |
| 39:07.42 | mikebledsoe | Well Ah, what? what came up for me is thinking about ah people who who value safety. Um, when people are being sold safety outside from outside and someone else is going to provide the safety I think I think providing. |
| 39:21.62 | Max Shank | Where. |
| 39:26.20 | mikebledsoe | Putting a lot of attention and and having a surplus of safety built up that you're responsible for that you you have control over you know this may be having a certain amount of money in the bank gold bars in your safe guns Ammo Seeds land. All those things. |
| 39:31.50 | Max Shank | M. |
| 39:45.69 | mikebledsoe | Ah, that is that safety when I but but the problem is is that's hard. That's it takes work to do that. You have to you have to think for yourself. You have to learn new things. Ah, and you do have to think ahead. |
| 39:56.16 | Max Shank | It's really hard. |
| 40:04.77 | mikebledsoe | But then somebody comes along says you know what I got you I got these guys that are policy enforcers they'll make sure that no 1 robs. It kills you. You know what? if if you run out of money I got you I'll give you some money. Ah, and. |
| 40:05.88 | Max Shank | I got it. |
| 40:19.71 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 40:23.86 | mikebledsoe | You know what? if you run out of money and food then you know what? ah you can at least get milk and bread homogenized though homogenized. So ah, it's and I think that's what Benjamin franklin was getting at with you know, it's not actually safety when someone else is providing you safety that rug can be pulled out from you. |
| 40:28.85 | Max Shank | So. |
| 40:43.77 | mikebledsoe | Underneath you in any moment because it's not yours. Yeah, yeah, so I think that what ah people really desire to be is anti-fragile and so to me. |
| 40:47.32 | Max Shank | It's dependence versus Independence That's all. |
| 41:03.26 | mikebledsoe | That is where ah true safety lies and so's to be Anti-fragile there's 2 things that I see have to be available and that is planning for the future in a way that you understand that there are things that we can do. To to mitigate risk and at the same time hold adaptability and be able to change in the moment and ah to me That's what leads to a good Anti-fagile state and that's what people actually want but they're so unaware of how to. Create anti-fragile systems in their life that it is like you know what just fuck it. This is a ah complex issue I'll outsource that. |
| 41:47.36 | Max Shank | Well, it's about exposure that's the key word I think because you can either expose yourself to stress and become more adaptable to the stress that will come in life or you can. Reduce the exposure and what happens if you reduce the exposure is eventually you end up in a tiny lockbox you completely eliminate exposure So at the extreme ends you have training. Um. Injecting yourself with small amounts of poison. So that if just in case, you're poisoned. You will have built up ah an immunity to it and then on the other hand you have I'm never going to touch dirt I'm never going to leave my house I'm only going to drink homogenized milk. |
| 42:33.84 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 42:44.55 | Max Shank | That is provided to me by someone else. So I'm not going to expose myself to any risk whatsoever and it works better if people get to assume their own risk because you need to have the um. Person who is making the choice ah suffer or experience those consequences and that's when you get the most evil shit is when the person making the choices is not experiencing the consequences case in point. Um. People who vote on what crime and punishment or laws are to be in place for our medical system. Don't use that creation. They use something separate that is better right? So You shouldn't have. |
| 43:37.50 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 43:41.89 | Max Shank | Ah, bridge build like in in ancient Rome I think we talked about it if you were a bridge builder soon as the bridge is Done. You sit down underneath the bridge while they drive shit over it because you need to have the incentive and the risk and the choice. Like all in the right place and yeah, exactly oh I Actually really like because we we probably talked to a lot of coaches. Also the difference between support and Accountability. So accountability. |
| 44:01.74 | mikebledsoe | It's accountability Ultimate accountability. Yeah. |
| 44:17.16 | Max Shank | If I'm a coach and I want to provide you with support that means I'm going to answer your questions if I want to provide you with accountability that means I'm going to ask you questions and I think both of those are super valuable. So the difference between support. |
| 44:27.72 | mikebledsoe | But e. |
| 44:33.81 | Max Shank | And accountability from a coaching standpoint I think is really useful. |
| 44:36.78 | mikebledsoe | I Like that like that distinction I was also thinking about ah you you you were going off on stress and I got me thinking about excess stress ah and ah stress in excess is called distress. |
| 44:47.79 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 44:55.94 | mikebledsoe | And the ah the stress that's actually beneficial that is going to provide you with enough stimulus that you can adapt to and learn would be u-stress and so I really like to keep that in mind when I'm training or when I'm learning a new skill or I'm. I'm doing anything in my business and ah 1 really good sign to see if you're in excess of stress is how you're breathing. So if you find yourself holding your breath a lot. You can be sitting at your computer running some numbers if you're holding your breath. You're experiencing distress. Your. |
| 45:25.74 | Max Shank | Um, normally. |
| 45:35.69 | mikebledsoe | You're not pumping out the hormones and and neurotransmitters that are conducive to learning. But if you're breathing nice and slow and you know semi-deep you're you're going to be your body's going to be filled with neurotransmitters hormones that. Are conducive to learning new skills and staying sharp and and not getting too much tunnel vision. So you you can hold the big picture while while focusing in on something. So I I Want to put that out. There is just like a that's something. That's that's useful that you can check in with yourself. If you're if you're experiencing ah that that excess of stress that's 1 way to figure it out and there to me. There's a way of expanding that that zone of youres ah or or the growth zone and that is by expanding your capacity to stay calm in the midst Of. Of chaos. |
| 46:33.46 | Max Shank | That's what I was just going to say is the skill is really being relaxed under stress and the more you expose yourself to it and dose it appropriately the more. |
| 46:37.96 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 46:49.19 | Max Shank | Effective. You will be the more resilient you will be the more useful. You will be people want to be useful you know and if you're weak and dependent. You're not useful and that might sound kind of harsh. But you're really, you're not doing any faith doing anyone any favors. |
| 47:07.16 | mikebledsoe | What. |
| 47:09.14 | Max Shank | In fact, in our current culture. You're you're really harming people. |
| 47:13.46 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think that that is the job of that that is 1 of the definitions I like to identify and define. What makes an adult 1 of my definitions is you're able to parent yourself. You're either. |
| 47:27.76 | Max Shank | Any independent. |
| 47:31.41 | mikebledsoe | You're you're able to mother and father yourself emotionally but also physically in the world but the other part of being an adult your job as an adult and it doesn't mean that if you haven't done if you haven't found the thing. But if you're on the path to finding a thing that. Is most useful like it's it's your job as an adult like a true adult that's contributing to society. They have made it their job to be Useful. You know where am I most useful in the world where am I most useful to society if if you were useful. Um, so useful that people in ways that other people find valuable. They're going to give you a lot of money for it and so I think that a lot of people who ah are struggling with money. They really just. |
| 48:13.94 | Max Shank | Further. |
| 48:25.17 | mikebledsoe | They're usually focused on themselves in a way and they're not actually focused on how they can be most most useful and and if you want to have a lot of money be useful at things at really expensive things be useful at things that people find incredibly valuable. So. Either solve a big problem for a few people or solve um a small problem for millions of people or billions of people and it really to me. That's the question I ask myself over time is is this the most useful use of my time for me is it the most useful. What? Ah, what are my my talents. My strengths my skills that are most useful to society. How can I contribute how can I package this in a way that I find to be beneficial and other people find beneficial too and I think that that leads to more of that that peace and contentment. |
| 49:19.56 | Max Shank | Well, there's something quite beautiful because as you and as you know I'm all about choice and freedom as the and love as the really important pillars for a society to function. Well when you offer. Something to somebody and they voluntarily purchase it. There's something really nice about that when you order someone to do something under penalty of stick. That's not that cool if you ask me so I'm I'm more about carrots. And if you are delivering something if you are offering something and delivering something that is truly valuable and you are not excessively spending. You'll never be poor. It's impossible and there's something very honest about the Market. That determines what people actually want and I think rather than getting caught up in the fact that it's numbers because the numbers are just about accounting. But if you offer something to someone that is really worth it for them. They're always going to take it. You know. So I think the fact that free choice is based on voluntary action rather than forced action and that there is a truth to someone paying for your product or service. It means they actually do want it I remember reading. Long time ago in the four hour work week how your friends will lie to you about your idea, you'll be like hey I got this idea for a widget What do you think and your friends are like oh my god that sounds amazing. You're so smart I love you ha ha and then you're like great I have a bunch in the trunk. Do you want to buy 1 and they're like ah no actually i. |
| 50:57.67 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 51:14.30 | Max Shank | So so people will lie and say oh that's a great idea when in actuality they they don't really believe that otherwise they would put their money where their mouth is. |
| 51:22.96 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that that's 1 reason I I advise a lot of times coaches want to give away their thing for free or at such a cheap rate early on I go like ah this just for research I'm like that's not research, you're researching people who don't care about your shit and. Until you get and then or or they'll launch them like oh I've got a hundred people that are interested I'm like okay and mean that doesn't mean shit either. Ah and it doesn't mean it shit until money's in the bank because that's that's the true indicator of of whether people value it or not. |
| 51:49.72 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 51:59.25 | Max Shank | Is that don't count your chickens before they've hatched. |
| 52:02.67 | mikebledsoe | Oh my God It's all man these ideas have been around for a long time. |
| 52:07.71 | Max Shank | Those old sayings are probably all you need to succeed if you actually paid attention to them. Ah, people people do accept people. Do people do excessive thinking excessive learning ah like that's 1 of my kinks that I'm into. |
| 52:12.77 | mikebledsoe | I I agree I agree I come back a lot of that shit. |
| 52:26.11 | Max Shank | I Like to learn about stuff that won't help me at all and I recognize that it's entertainment I understand you know mental lattice work Framework Blah Blah Blah Whatever but I recognize that it's it's recreation Basically the amount of stuff. |
| 52:38.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 52:41.77 | Max Shank | That you need to really focus on and pay attention to in order to live happily and in some level of abundance is so minimal you know most people kill themselves I think I've said this before on the podcast in America most. Death is self-caed because you could cherry pick and be like oh no, it's heart disease or no, it's diabetes. It's like what are those diseases about those are diseases of excess right? like you are either responsible for eating too many fritos and watching. |
| 53:10.82 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 53:19.67 | Max Shank | You know too many episodes of the Jersey shore or you're not but the problem is if you blame. There's no end to the blaming right? if you see a fat kid with fat parents. You'd be like oh well, that's of course the parent's fault and it's the parent's responsibility. |
| 53:32.96 | mikebledsoe | I Thought it was genetics. |
| 53:39.30 | Max Shank | Anyway, So yeah, it's Monkey See Monkey do is more like it and I think. |
| 53:43.45 | mikebledsoe | It is what it is Yeah because yeah, you go far, you go far enough back in that family lineage they weren't fat eaten potatoes during a famine. |
| 53:54.52 | Max Shank | Exactly and I think once again, we can be excessively looking to blame rather than effectively looking for responsibility and I think the difference between fault or blame and responsibility is a huge 1 because it's so easy I mean I lived with a chip on my shoulder for years and years and years and was like in my mind thinking about all the people who had wronged me. You know that kind of destructive thinking but the reality is is that here and now none of that matters. |
| 54:23.31 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 54:31.28 | Max Shank | If You can thank your lucky stars that you're alive and probably literate and you have all of these advantages. There are stores full of Food. You probably have a refrigerator a telephone a magic telephone that can teach you anything you have so many advantages. And whether it's your parents' fault that you're fat or lazy or whatever or not kind of doesn't Matter. It's your responsibility now to decide what you'd like to do from here on out and that's where you take back that Authority that's where you take back that authorship and like you said you put the pen down on paper. And you're going to clarify your thinking to an enormous level and I I do that every morning even if it's something that isn't directly related to me earning more dollars but it usually will help me make more sense of the world. |
| 55:24.74 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah I I Um I would say I'm on the excessive thinking as Well. The but I mean I appreciate your excessive thinking because what you just said was probably. Product of that have you read the book mastery by Robert green. Yeah, 1 of the things I Really like about that book is um the thing that really stood out was how he highlighted. Ah how? Ah, some of the most innovative people. |
| 55:45.95 | Max Shank | Yeah Robert greene. Yeah. |
| 56:02.68 | mikebledsoe | Are a product of having mastered 3 things and it taking about 7 to 10 years to develop mastery around a topic or a subject and ah I up until I read that book I tended to judge myself for going from. |
| 56:04.52 | Max Shank | The. |
| 56:21.72 | mikebledsoe | Being really good at 1 thing and then just completely changing industries and going. Oh I was into this but now I do nothing but this and then I did this other thing I go oh it's like you don't know so you know, excessive thinking or excessive collecting of information. |
| 56:24.68 | Max Shank | Right? Up. Ah. |
| 56:41.30 | mikebledsoe | I think that I think it's good. You point out it's entertainment but that entertainment is something that's I find to be very useful in just helping my mind relax so that when I do get back to the things I'm focusing on. Um, it's it's my I come at it with ah with a new mind but also fast forward 5 years you know that that information may come useful most of most of my excess thinking in my my youth has been around philosophical topics and how to think and all these things which have been useful but probably the most useful it's become is having conversations like this which people will now listen to and get some benefit from. |
| 57:03.56 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 57:20.75 | mikebledsoe | So we both tend to collect what may seem like trivial information but at some point these dots connect into something that's useful. |
| 57:28.43 | Max Shank | And that's usually where innovation happens too. I have a super diverse set of interest. Um I have a 3 ring binder. That's full of study guides ah from different topics that range From. Electricity to chemistry and physics and biology and it's basically like study guides for tests but it just happens to be the highest concentration of information about these topics and I like peruse through these things and you know peruse means study deeply. |
| 57:58.86 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 58:07.30 | Max Shank | Rather than like a quick look over most people misuse that word peruse Peru Yeah, most most people use peruse as like a quick scan but ah, it's just the opposite and if they had perused a dictionary they would they would know that. Ah so so. |
| 58:10.53 | mikebledsoe | Really I did not know that. |
| 58:26.69 | Max Shank | Ah I play a bunch of different musical instruments I have a huge diverse set of interests and then my friend is really into investing and that's like all he studies and he's all about sharpening that 1 blade and we talk about how? ah. The Japanese culture is very much that way. There's not a lot of innovation but there is a lot of refinement so they will perhaps not invent the sword but they will take the invention of the sword and refine it into the best sword ever. |
| 59:02.55 | mikebledsoe | Well, they did it with cars. |
| 59:04.46 | Max Shank | So there's right, they wouldn't innovate something like that. But once they have it now they they refine it and that's 2 ways. Absolutely. |
| 59:10.54 | mikebledsoe | What toy toyota is known to be 1 of the most dependable vehicles and it's because of their manufacturing process is they they revolutionize manufacturing through the 6 sigma. Yeah that what they they're basically did they invent the 6 sigma system. |
| 59:20.27 | Max Shank | Um, that's top down from the culture. |
| 59:27.42 | Max Shank | Have no clue. Yeah. |
| 59:29.34 | mikebledsoe | Or yeah, it's they either invented or or again probably refined it. |
| 59:33.67 | Max Shank | So you could argue that they're spending an excessive amount of time to just refine something rather than being like hey it's good. You got a car already. What's the big deal. So ah, excess is kind of like beauty. It's in the eye of the beholder and. |
| 59:48.95 | mikebledsoe | Well, that's that's that's also the beauty of capitalism right is somebody the japanese could be excessive and and that whereas the west coast of the United states is excessive and and trying new creative things most of which will never work. Ah. |
| 59:52.39 | Max Shank | Typically. |
| 01:00:05.94 | Max Shank | Right? well. |
| 01:00:08.45 | mikebledsoe | And so the California makes Japan possible and Japan makes california possible. |
| 01:00:15.10 | Max Shank | Yeah,, there's a big interrelationship between going wide and expanding your focus out or narrowing your focus down. It's kind of like when we talk about focus I say you have the lantern and the laser beam and the lantern is like a soft radiant Glow. In 3 hundred and sixty degrees and the lasers focusing all same amount of energy all onto a single point. |
| 01:00:40.10 | mikebledsoe | Well this is why you're not going to have a lot of Ph Ds running companies and because they have spent so much of their time focused in on a single subject and in fact, don't know a lot of times. Not all Ph Ds are this way but a lot of Ph Ds I've met. |
| 01:00:50.68 | Max Shank | A. |
| 01:00:57.68 | mikebledsoe | Ah, very smart and is 1 area. Not very smart in a lot of other areas and you take somebody who is you know a serial entrepreneur someone who may be ceoing different companies and their focus is much broader. They know a lot. Know a lot of different a little bit about a lot of different things more like ah a swiss army knife or Jack of all trades and is what I've seen. |
| 01:01:22.40 | Max Shank | Like a concentration of a portfolio like we talked about I think we talked about it last week you know if you put all your eggs in 1 basket. Don't put all your eggs in 1 basket you can earn a lot more but you could also lose all of them. |
| 01:01:36.36 | mikebledsoe | How many how many of these sayings revolve around chickens and eggs and because you got ducks in a row too. We haven't brought that 1 up I mean yeah, there's something about foul. Yeah. |
| 01:01:46.77 | Max Shank | That's a good point. A bird in the hand is worth 2 in the bush. That's not true anymore that did I already mention that because a bird in the hand has got to be worth like fucking a Hundred in the bush because think how shitty people are at catching birds like I wouldn't be able to catch a fucking. |
| 01:01:54.53 | mikebledsoe | Now. |
| 01:02:04.64 | Max Shank | Bird in a bush. Ah. |
| 01:02:05.78 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, but if you got but our ah bird shot right? Go you might get five? Yeah, all right I think we're we're starting to become unfocused I don't know if that's actually true I think we've been whatever. |
| 01:02:08.79 | Max Shank | Bird shot. Yeah, a way better chance. |
| 01:02:21.70 | Max Shank | I Think we explored excess to a good amount. |
| 01:02:24.60 | mikebledsoe | We're we're explored a lot now. We're getting off another subjects which is great. Yeah, we don't want to excessively discuss excess. So I how does greatness happen. Oh yep. |
| 01:02:33.53 | Max Shank | That's how greatness happens f y I just to close if you're excessively focused on 1 thing I was talking to someone the other day he dropped by the gym and he trains with his buddy in the garage and he said yeah my friend is always referencing your Stuff. He's always saying oh max says this or max says that he he really? Ah, um, you know he really buys in to what I don't remember exactly the phrase he used but I was like yeah you know I basically just got lucky that I found something that I was crazy interested in. |
| 01:03:07.87 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:03:10.40 | Max Shank | Because that's the the big mystery is that I just happen to be really interested in human movement and fitness and pain and psychology and I see that as the way to liberate yourself and. |
| 01:03:15.20 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 01:03:24.63 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:03:28.56 | Max Shank | I'll totally eat your lunch if you're just going to be a casual observer of exercise If you're just casually interested in exercise you have no chance to compare to me because you're not taking it to that excessive level. So. |
| 01:03:40.95 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:03:47.77 | Max Shank | If you want to be great at something. There's something to be said about total immersion and I think that if you really immerse yourself in a topic. You can be top ten percent in 2 years maybe even less and top ten percent you're still eating lobster at that point. |
| 01:04:03.42 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, all right I was thinking 1 percent I don't think it takes that I was it. Um, what was the figure if you read 5 books books on a subject you're you're in the top five percent something like I know if that's actually true but that that was like 1 of those. Ah sayings I picked up on is like if you read 5 books on 1 subject because most people never do most people read 1 book on a subject and then they they go. Okay I move on ah on to something else. That's True. That's True. A lot of. |
| 01:04:22.13 | Max Shank | Sounds like um. I mean it depends on the book. A lot of books suck. They might actually make you dumber about the topic even if the person is smart even if the person is smart. Did I tell you about my favorite Author Lee's favorite book Flow have you ever tried to read that book by. |
| 01:04:38.84 | mikebledsoe | Popular books are that way. |
| 01:04:44.40 | mikebledsoe | No oh yeah, we've talked about this chicks and me high. |
| 01:04:49.74 | Max Shank | Mi high chick sent me good god it's like it's unreadable. Um, and I'm excessively obsessed with the flow state where decision making is easier. Athletic performance is higher. Mental peace is higher mental performance is higher. All these things are better I'm like so interested in the topic and I'm trying to get through this book I'm like this guy doesn't know how to communicate an idea like is driving me nuts. |
| 01:05:13.67 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, ah, let's close this bad boy up I um, you know I think my big takeaways here is ah monitor. What's useful for your life and your goals. If you feel you're you're going getting into excess and as max was saying excess is ah very useful if you want to be really good at something but it is probably not the thing that's going to bring you a lot of peace and joy. |
| 01:05:50.94 | Max Shank | It might if you really like it. |
| 01:05:54.56 | mikebledsoe | Well I think that ah you know, maybe if you're enjoying the process. |
| 01:06:00.19 | Max Shank | Yeah I would say that just to wrap it all up with an action point try fasting take a couple days off of food take a couple days off of Media. That's the easiest way to. Get back in balance or at least the fastest way and just write stuff down with pen and paper and write down what you want how you think you can get it what you're grateful for I mean we could go on and on but basically just ah, take a fast from all forms of Media. And put your cell phone away in the drawer turn it off and just get out the pen and paper and see what's there because you probably don't need to read any more books or watch any more videos you just need to organize what you already know and focus it down into something that's useful. |
| 01:06:53.63 | mikebledsoe | Excellent. Love you too later. |
| 01:06:56.80 | Max Shank | Thanks Mikey! Love you buddy later. |
| 00:00.44 | mikebledsoe | I'm gonna try oh welcome to the max Mike or them. Oh no, no no oh I Totally screwed it up already do over do over. Okay, welcome to yeah I'll edit it. Yeah well. |
| 00:03.90 | Max Shank | That's how it works when you try. Okay, we got to do it over. We got to do it over just start start over fuck that wait wait wait. We're still recording though the whole time. Yo no, you won't just start the whole thing over. |
| 00:19.65 | mikebledsoe | I had it every time. Yeah. |
| 00:20.97 | Max Shank | Really oh, that's cool. |
| 00:27.30 | mikebledsoe | Ah, welcome to Mondays with mike and Max or if max is saying it. It's max and mike and today we're gonna be talking about learning. We want to teach you how to be a genius and you know. I would say that max and I are both geniuses at certain things I wouldn't say across the board but we have gotten really good at a few things apiece and ah and and things that we were not good at as children. So it's not 1 of those things where we just became good at it. Because you know our dad did it or anything like that. So we have both put a lot of attention into learning how to learn and that has taken us pretty far I would say most people would say that we're happier and more successful than the average guy. |
| 01:20.13 | Max Shank | Sound really happy right now. No I Guess we're probably just happier than the average person. That's good. |
| 01:21.90 | mikebledsoe | Our age Do I do I fuck I didn't think so. |
| 01:30.80 | mikebledsoe | Um, well I'm happier than I'm happier than ah I used to be I can say that. So um, um. |
| 01:35.84 | Max Shank | Happiness is a state of mind folks. |
| 01:40.34 | mikebledsoe | Ah, maybe um, but you can also learn to be happy. So yeah, holding a perspective and being able to stabilize that state. Yeah well. |
| 01:45.13 | Max Shank | Oh yeah, meditation is a state of mind too. Meditation is a state of mind you can practice that as well hundred percent. |
| 01:58.13 | mikebledsoe | 1 thing that was brought to my attention when it comes to learning is there's a difference between accumulating facts and being able to regurgitate them or to be able to know how to do a certain thing and there's another. It's another thing to hold us. Ah. Hold a perspective so wholly that the knowledge that's necessary to make things happen or to have a conversation just comes with a lot of ease and it's more of ah, being able to stabilize that perspective but people who are into. Ah. Obtaining a lot of knowledge what they'll do is they'll they'll they'll tap into that perspective for a moment and then they'll slide back into their current perspective and then over time you accumulate enough Data Points. You can you can solidify that and then the conversation becomes very very easy when. |
| 02:56.36 | Max Shank | I Call it Toolbelt knowledge I say if you can access it immediately and you use it with some regularity then it's in the tool belt and then you have something That's maybe like toolbox knowledge. Where for example I speak. |
| 02:56.37 | mikebledsoe | Discussing a certain topic. |
| 03:14.96 | Max Shank | Ah, fluent Spanish but there are some words that I wouldn't be able to think of out of the blue. But if someone said it to me I would understand what they were saying and so I think that's more like in the tool like I I can't like you I don't use it all the time and there's been some deterioration. |
| 03:25.16 | mikebledsoe | What. |
| 03:34.10 | Max Shank | But I would understand it like I would know what you're talking about and so I just think of it like you have tool belt knowledge which is readily available and more importantly, you use it with some regularity because there's ah, there's a half -life or there's a shelf life I guess on. Information and if you don't use it. You lose it. That's a big thing for learn for learning. |
| 03:54.66 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I guess similar to the perspective conversation is if if it's it's looking through a specific lens and if you're looking through that lens regularly you're it's in use in it and it stabilizes if you're not looking through it regularly. It gets dirty. |
| 04:13.95 | Max Shank | Perspective is a huge thing. Um, it's hard to even say where to begin with something as important as perspective because perspective is a locale.. It's like are you zoomed in. Are you zoomed out. Are you looking into the past. Are you looking into the Future. What's the the tint on the lens you know that saying ah seeing the world with rose-colored glasses or through rose colored glasses and some people see the world as a ah, very dark and mean and nasty place and they see themselves. As ah, unlucky. For example, but that's just a matter of what you focus on and that whole comparison syndrome that we get into is really the only thing that colors how lucky we feel or don't feel. So. It's all what you compare it to because you can't define something in isolation you have to compare it to something else same with distance same with mass same with ah the way you live anything it all is what you compare it to. |
| 05:23.80 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, was they say the ah comparison is a thief of all joy I find it to be a bit easier to learn things when I'm happy um and can learn more than them. Ah, there's I remember looking at a study at 1 point that said that. |
| 05:27.86 | Max Shank | Um, I've heard that. |
| 05:43.24 | mikebledsoe | If you add play into what you're learning then you can learn up to 20 times faster. So. |
| 05:50.62 | Max Shank | Well play is 2 things you said recently play is the first form of training which is practicing which is learning. That's what animals do like big cats. Small cats too other predators they play. As their first form of killing. Basically so um, play is the first form of practice or training or learning if you want to call it that and then the other thing you were saying about being happy is for true learning to occur. |
| 06:11.39 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 06:28.49 | Max Shank | You need to be interested so you need to be curious and you need to be motivated. Um, you can learn something but you won't truly like learn it and own it if you're doing it just because you must like. For example, school and we could do a whole podcast. About how school is the most colossal misuse of time and abuse of children that I can think of but we'll skip that for another time my point is I mean look it's it's bad but we don't need to belabor the point. Ah yeah. |
| 07:05.42 | mikebledsoe | I'm in agreement by the way I'm not so the the listeners if I'm laughing because I I know where max is coming from not because I think he's ridiculous. |
| 07:07.41 | Max Shank | I'm not gonna change. |
| 07:13.60 | Max Shank | I mean I've taught people stuff in ah in a three day seminar that actually increase their income and their physical health. There's 3 days like that's not long and in 12 years they like don't remember what Sacajawea did they just know that that's a word fuck that shit. |
| 07:20.71 | mikebledsoe | Right? 3 days that. |
| 07:30.63 | mikebledsoe | And they're probably they're less healthy in no better position to make money. |
| 07:31.45 | Max Shank | Ridiculous. |
| 07:35.16 | Max Shank | Yeah, you sit in a desk for a really long time. You're like looking straight down. It's horrifically bad anyway, all all that. Ah, ah, torture of children aside the reason that people don't remember it is because a it's not in the tool belt because they're not using it. And b they're being coerced into doing it like you must remember this or you will fail and be Bad. It's like okay like I'll do it but I'm not going to not going to do as good a job I'm not going to be as excited and enthusiasm about it and enthusiasm. Comes from ah the root for being possessed by spirit possessed by the Muse. So enthusiasm is really the the energy. That's why you can see people who have very little knowledge actually. Be extremely successful because they're very enthusiastic about the little that they know. |
| 08:34.94 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I've been talking to my girlfriend about that a bit is she? ah. |
| 08:49.37 | mikebledsoe | Ah, Max is red with laughter. Ah now I've been talking about ah but well I noticed that there's a lot of people who make a lot of money in real estate. So we've been talking about getting more aggressive about. |
| 08:52.81 | Max Shank | Ah, ah. |
| 09:06.81 | mikebledsoe | Investing in real estate and I and it's ah it's a new I know a bit she knows a bit we need to get deeper into it if we want to be good at it. But I go I look at it I go I know a lot of people who invest in real estate or and have been very successful and they don't ah. Occur to me to be the most intelligent people on the planet. They're not.. They're not some type of Genius They they're they Found. They are some type of Genius They found a way to do something and they just repeat it and because that's what works in real estate you find. |
| 09:27.28 | Max Shank | And. They are some type of genius. |
| 09:43.37 | mikebledsoe | Find someone who's really successful in real estate and you'll you'll find that they they do 1 or 2 things and they just do it over and over and over and over again. It's it's a bit redundant, but it's also very exciting to watch your your personal wealth climb. |
| 09:58.28 | Max Shank | Yeah, and you can also lose your shirt in real estate. You can get totally burned by buying a property at the wrong time and not really predicting or preparing for an income decrease I'll just. |
| 10:03.73 | mikebledsoe | Here. |
| 10:17.45 | Max Shank | Just remember seeing this house in del mar near where I live and it was ah sold for 18 million a couple years later they put it on the market for 21 million and then I watched them progressively lower the price all the way down to 6 million. |
| 10:36.24 | mikebledsoe | Whoa. |
| 10:37.16 | Max Shank | So the value went from 18 million to 6 million and you know there were like all kinds of crashes and stuff going on but this was like on the bluffs like right by the beach in del mar probably that because there are 3 rules in real estate right? location location location this was a. |
| 10:53.43 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 10:57.13 | Max Shank | Primo like Crown Jewel of real estate. It was massive had tennis court. Its right on the beach was ridiculous but they they got taken to the cleaners because they bought it the wrong time and they couldn't survive through the liquidity crisis. Basically like there's that saying that markets can stay irrational longer than you can stay solvent which is kind of a good thing to keep in mind. |
| 11:23.87 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, Well I think ah great. That's a great point is that that's not likely an intelligence issue as much as it is um, ah, people in what I've seen with people who do make mistakes in investing is. They let their emotions take over and they're afraid that they have a fear of loss and then that's why or they're a fear of missing out or a fear of loss and which a fear of missing out is just fear of future loss and or potential loss and and. |
| 11:59.32 | Max Shank | Yeah I think go ahead. |
| 12:03.54 | mikebledsoe | And people they break their own rules like they have this rule around how to invest in real estate or they have a rule that they that's been passed down and if you follow those rules it 99 percent of time you probably can be fine. But then you see a spike in the market or you see a dip in the market and then you you freak out and you react or you you break your own rules or you break the rules of the people who taught you and that because of an emotional experience and that's when people that's what I see when people lose their shirt. |
| 12:35.70 | Max Shank | Well, it's risk reward right? if you concentrate your bet into 1 thing like let's say you put all of your money on Alibaba 15 years ago, you'd be like really really happy and if you put all your money in blockbuster Video. You'd be really really sad and if you diversified you wouldn't have returned as much as if you had concentrated all of your money into 1 big bet. But you're also limiting how much you can lose. So. I think with life and with investing the thing you want to understand is that it's usually pretty ah clear risk reward ratio and you want to try to aim for things that where you have 2 ways to win and no way to lose pretty much and there's another saying I like which is. |
| 13:27.13 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 13:31.91 | Max Shank | Why risk what you need for what you don't need and that's why you know you hear a story about someone you know, buying some unknown cryptocurrency and they like 10 X their money and then you're like feeling greedy yourself, you're feeling that fear of missing out. So you might catch it at the very top and then and then catch the falling knife as it goes down whereas they caught all the upside. So We we try to use the past to predict the future but it doesn't always go that Way. So if you. |
| 13:55.77 | mikebledsoe | Yep. |
| 14:11.80 | Max Shank | Plan for the fact that you will sometimes be wrong it. It works out. Okay. |
| 14:19.70 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that's that's the point of anti- fragile the book by is it Nicholas taleeb nasim he he wrote black swan anti-fragile. There's a new 1 that came out that I want to on a read next. And yeah. |
| 14:22.65 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 14:37.87 | mikebledsoe | The whole concept. He's ah he's a great investor himself. Ah and his perspective on strategies for investing is pretty much saying you know shit will go wrong. So how are you set up for that whereas most people like. |
| 14:51.59 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 14:56.10 | mikebledsoe | You know they're watching the crypto markets right now and I mean I mean this applies to the learning conversation we get because if. |
| 15:01.23 | Max Shank | Yeah, you don't have to be smart to do well in investing like um isaac Newton famously said something along the lines of he could predict the movement of celestial bodies but not the madness of crowds and he like lost all of his money. Investing in the East india trading company he like got taken to the cleaners lost every I mean obviously a very intelligent fellow. |
| 15:20.51 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah, so. |
| 15:26.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well well let's just take bitcoin for instance I've been paying attention to crypto markets since 20138 years which is over half the amount of time they've been in existence. So. |
| 15:34.44 | Max Shank | The. |
| 15:44.18 | mikebledsoe | I've been through some booms and buss already and what I know because I've been in it long enough is I go Yeah, just you buy a bunch and then you hold it and then you watch everything go up and down and watch everyone else freak out and then you just keep on holding it and you keep on holding it and you keep on holding it and you take some off here and there. Um, there is a strategy for for when to take some out and but most people aren't playing that game. Well, that's the thing It is simple. It is very very simple. Ah, but when the people who who suffer and I've got many close friends who. |
| 16:06.70 | Max Shank | Make it sound so simple. You make it sound so simple. |
| 16:23.40 | mikebledsoe | The market starts going up and they start dumping money in or the market starts going down and they start pulling money out and I'm I'm going Whoa Whoa Whoa Just just chill the fuck out just consistently put money in consistently pull money Out. Don't you know. You're not going to.. You're not going to see the wave coming if because if you can see it then everyone else can see it and sometimes that does drive the market up a bit but again long term strategy I've had I've had really big returns from that that simplicity just. |
| 16:55.86 | Max Shank | So what you're saying is you are an investing genius. |
| 17:01.39 | mikebledsoe | Um, well are we gonna be playing comparison here. Ah you know what I'm in the 1 percent I'm in the 1 percent for crypto I'll say this I'm in the 1 percent of crypto trading. Ah when it comes to investing in general. No. |
| 17:11.15 | Max Shank | Um, okay oh that's good. |
| 17:20.10 | mikebledsoe | I'm I'm not I The crypto thing is huh How does what differ I Oh crypto trading versus investing versus. |
| 17:20.98 | Max Shank | How do they differ. How do they differ. Ah well I mean it's they're both and they're they're both investing I think the big mistake people make with investing Probably the biggest mistake is they invest money. That they might need soon. |
| 17:41.00 | mikebledsoe | Well,, there's that 1 and then they invest money in speculation versus Value. So 1 of my rules in investing is what value is being generated in the world by this product or by this service and So. Do I Find what they're creating to be valuable Tesla For instance, do I do I think that those cars hold out. Absolutely they're creating something valuable some of these cryptocurrencies that are you know a 2 page white paper and you know they just. |
| 18:02.43 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 18:18.76 | mikebledsoe | Fleece everybody and they don't have any specific when I when I read about what the purpose of that cryptocurrency is and it doesn't make sense to me and it doesn't seem valuable to me I don't touch it. So. |
| 18:30.82 | Max Shank | Maybe that's lesson 2 of investing is invest in things that you understand. |
| 18:35.35 | mikebledsoe | Invest in things you understand, but ah I think invest in things you find valuable and Beyond beyond the dollar. |
| 18:40.48 | Max Shank | Well, that's not necessarily. Yeah I mean that's not I disagree because if you invest in something that's valuable at a price that is unreasonable then you still lose money on your investment. |
| 18:56.13 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's got to be worth the value that it's demanding. |
| 18:59.64 | Max Shank | And that's really hard to determine. You know you have price-to earnarings ratios you have identifying trends and there are all these ways that we try to get clear on what something will be worth later. Will it be worth more later and there are all kinds of things like. |
| 19:13.19 | mikebledsoe | You know. |
| 19:17.89 | Max Shank | There was a 20 year period where coca -cola returned a zero percent return to its investors and you'd think like man coca -cola is valuable. Their brand is worth billions by itself. But it it all depends on what you pay for and that's the same thing with real estate. Um, unless you are holding real estate for 50 years the profit is in the buying. Yeah. |
| 19:40.61 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the deals made and or the the value is in. It's in the buying it's when you make the purchase. Um that that's for sure and that's ah, that's a big reason why and I haven't tried to touch anything in the last year is everything's so hot it is cooling off a bit. The markets are cooling off a bit but it's been so hot that and people are like you could better get in I'm going get into what I'm gonna get in at the peak. So I can come crash with the rest of you now. |
| 20:07.53 | Max Shank | The the Fomo the Fomo hard to know if it's the peak. That's the tricky thing about investing I mean there are a lot of ah big institutions buying lots of real estate right now and it's um. |
| 20:17.98 | mikebledsoe | M. |
| 20:26.21 | Max Shank | Apparently this is now an investing podcast. So if you're tuning in this is investing tips with max and Mike ah. |
| 20:33.71 | mikebledsoe | I Always try to stay away from investing tips too because. |
| 20:36.89 | Max Shank | Yeah, it's the worst like this is not a recommendation I think everyone listening should just go by tulip bulbs as many tulip bulbs as possible fill your garage with Tulip bulbs. That's the tricky thing about times like ah. Like what we're seeing right now is some things just go absolutely meteoric they go insanely high so fast and if you are investing in something more steady. Let's say like real estate perhaps usually more steady. Ah, you're getting blown out of the water by some kid who bought dog coins so in the short term. You're just getting absolutely murdered if you're really looking at value which is. |
| 21:17.17 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 21:27.27 | Max Shank | About Theio ah about the Price-to-arings ratio like what's the prospect. But also what's the priceturnings ratio Anyway, the whole point is if you are not going to take a lot of time to make investing your career. You probably are better off just buying the market overall and minimizing. |
| 21:47.14 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, which did really well this last year but I mean if we adjust for inflation and a few other things probably just did okay. |
| 21:47.20 | Max Shank | The risk like just by the S and P five hundred. Yeah, yeah. |
| 22:04.50 | Max Shank | It's a tricky thing because it all comes back to opportunity cost and I use these analogies for exercise quite a lot.. It's like our you know our heavy squats. Good. It's like well maybe. A for who and B can I do something better with that Energy. You know what? I'm saying so the same thing is true with investing. It's not is this good. It's is this better than the other stuff I could own and that's that's why it's so tricky because. You know you look. There are a lot of good companies that you can own that create value that are profitable. There are a lot of companies that you can own that are not profitable and so it's purely based on a prediction that they will create more and more value in the future. |
| 22:46.33 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, um. |
| 22:55.54 | Max Shank | Above and Beyond what is already priced. It's very tricky stuff. Anyway, if you you're not going to make it tool belt knowledge. You shouldn't ah fuck around with that. |
| 22:57.25 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 23:04.38 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. Back to learning. |
| 23:14.59 | Max Shank | You'll learn your lesson really fast if you invest money that you shouldn't a fool and his money are soon parted. |
| 23:20.46 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well the 1 thing I notice I'll say one last thing on investing. Ah when you're you're talking about opportunity costs I I watch people try to invest money when they're in credit card debt. So they. |
| 23:35.82 | Max Shank | Don't do that paid pay down the debt that's stupid. You get the interest tax free. They don't understand money. Yeah, exactly. |
| 23:39.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the the amount of people that tell that tells me that someone doesn't understand how the numbers work. Yeah, you just don't understand money because your best investment is to not have credit card debt if you have credit card debt. Nothing nothing's going to be that 10 to twenty percent interest you're paying on that. |
| 23:55.15 | Max Shank | Crazy. Yeah, that's ridiculous I would say pay down the credit card debt and then after that invest in your income you know invest in building a customer list building a product setting up your service-based business more effectively because you can get. |
| 24:03.69 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 24:14.74 | Max Shank | Hundred percent 2 hundred percent thousand percent returns by investing in yourself. But if you get a fifteen percent return year over year in the market. You'd be like Yay. So. |
| 24:23.32 | mikebledsoe | Well, there's something about money going in your bank account that you didn't have to do shit for I get I got some cheap thrills out of that. |
| 24:28.99 | Max Shank | Totally yeah, but if you set up ah an online library of products that'll that'll bring in money without any extra effort to plus you plus you own your customer list. |
| 24:44.34 | mikebledsoe | That's true. That's true. |
| 24:48.74 | Max Shank | And that's huge I mean you see right now. Some people are are losing their instagrams and facebooks and Youtube accounts for saying things that they I I suppose shouldn't have said because Papa Papa Youtube Said. Ah. Wasn't okay to say those things and you know if you are dependent on another entity entity to store all of your customers for you. They can go away so you got to have your own you got to own your customer list. |
| 25:23.60 | mikebledsoe | Just made a post about that the other day email is not dead so many who are focused on social media when ah, that's right again if you're looking investing that's ah. |
| 25:24.97 | Max Shank | That's so important you got to own that customer list. No it works it works until it doesn't. |
| 25:42.30 | mikebledsoe | That's 1 that's got a ah a black swan event. Ah as a possibility and and that is black swans occur when you're least expecting them and the event that does occur that brings a downturn is not something you ever imagined would happen. |
| 25:44.53 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 26:00.42 | Max Shank | And. |
| 26:01.83 | mikebledsoe | Just 1 day you wake up and shit hit the fan and so that can happen if Facebook youtube instagram decides or google decides to to stop featuring your stuff you know shadow banning is 1 1 way where it's not. Overt you didn't see you get blocked but all of a sudden your traffic goes to nil and and I've got several friends that's happened to not just in the last couple years but over the last 3 4 years there's ah there's a very clear. |
| 26:20.82 | Max Shank | Um, wild. |
| 26:38.69 | mikebledsoe | Ah I Guess attack I don't know I hate using the word attack in this sense. But there's a clear diversion of attention away from things and people that are actually helpful towards big corporate desires and. And wanting people to adopt more main you know Mainstream corporate services and products. |
| 26:59.75 | Max Shank | Well. Um, hey man ah censorship is an admission of guilt if you ask me? Yeah, yeah, So as long as we're on the learning subject. |
| 27:09.46 | mikebledsoe | I like that I like that censorship is an admission of guilt. |
| 27:23.97 | Max Shank | We can we we um problem maybe ah what is rewarded is repeated. That's ah, that's a big thing about learning. So there's. |
| 27:25.75 | mikebledsoe | I think we've talked about learning for 5 out of twenty five minutes so far. |
| 27:40.30 | Max Shank | Conscious learning where you're like oh I'm going to learn to play the piano or I'm going to learn how to speak german and then there's unconscious learning it could be conscious also but where you adapt to certain patterns. You know your phone. May notice that you prefer watching animal videos at night. But you prefer watching news videos in the morning I know that was that was what I noticed interestingly enough when I was just still logging in. To youtube instead of using a separate browser and not being logged in and just searching for what I want and it would give me like you know would give me like John stossel and all these different guys who I actually trust and then at night it would show me more like. Animal videos like learn about the peacock spider and things like that so you will um basically be guided throughout your day by algorithms that are digital or otherwise. And you develop these patterns that are repeated over and over again. So it's very difficult to get out of those patterns once you're in and that's why having a pattern break is so valuable. |
| 29:02.35 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well, it's Interesting. You come out the unconscious learning and I read this book called Spiritual enlightenment. The damnedest thing by Jed Mckenna have you read that 1 okay. I Think you really enjoy it total. Yeah yeah. |
| 29:20.99 | Max Shank | I've only read like 4 or 5 books in my life total. Yeah, that includes Dr. seuss books. The loax was good. |
| 29:31.70 | mikebledsoe | Ah, so in that book he talks about how the mind is built and he says that people like to visualize the mind like it's this beautiful web and I've got this thought over here this belief or this idea and it's over here and then ah and. String goes across and it connects over here and this is beautiful intricate web that just it's infinite in Nature. That's how I used to think about the mind and the fact that he outlines that in the book tells me that other people think about the mind similarly and. He talks about how how ah language is laid out when as we as we get older and the order in which we learn words impacts how our mind works and what those words mean to us at that age and how that impacts the mind and. But he what he finally gets to in this explanation is that people think that mine is this beautiful integrated web and it's really just a rat's nest. It's just all jumbled up you and I could be born at the same time same place same parents in our interpretation of. The world is gonna be different and and you only need 1 interpretation early on kind of like the butterfly effect right? He's like you've got this butterfly over here that causes a hurricane on the other side of the world. Ah, there's 1 1 instance where you interpret something your mom or dad did at the age of 2 that shape your personality in a way that the impact the lens that you look through for the rest of your life and so you completely neglect certain pieces of information and you collect the evidence to support your your lens. |
| 31:25.90 | Max Shank | Is confirmation Bias right. |
| 31:25.63 | mikebledsoe | Over here, right? and nobody is nobody is safe from that confirmation Bias we we all do it and so that's 1 thing that when we if we're talking about learning needs to be acknowledged is that. Much of what we we believe to be true just is not true and it's good to question those be able to question those thoughts and and do some unlearning because learning something new I I found to be a lot easier to learn new things. When I look at what must be unlearned and that's not necessarily an easy task. So the way I look at it is ah it's easier to to write on a if we're thinking about a. Ah, a hard drive I want an empty hard drive and I want to be able just put things on top of that or what may be better is up. Yeah, or or you got a page you're you're writing you're writing your thoughts on a page with a pencil and. |
| 32:30.10 | Max Shank | Empty your cup like that ah martial arts example. |
| 32:42.41 | mikebledsoe | Ah, you're just having to rewrite So you've got these thoughts that you believe to be true and you're trying to overwrite them So you're just trying to make the words on top of those other words darker and thinking that you're going to be able to change those thoughts and at some point those darker words may overshadow. |
| 32:51.17 | Max Shank | The. |
| 33:01.11 | mikebledsoe | Words that were previously on the page. But why don't you just use an eraser first using erase or era words then write. It'll be much more clear it. So it it may take a little more effort in the beginning but long run it's way easier or if you start with a blank page instead of a. |
| 33:06.78 | Max Shank | A. |
| 33:19.59 | mikebledsoe | Page that already has writing on it. These are the things that this is how I think about the mind and when I'm learning something new I ask myself? what do I need to unlearn before I learn this. |
| 33:31.89 | Max Shank | I think part of the reason it's hard for people to let go or erase or burn ego death is because they identify so much with it whether it's ah good or bad or neutral. It's familiar and we gain a lot of our sense of stability through our self-im image and so if you have a self image that is maybe harmful to you. You know some people are ah shoot all kinds of things anorexic. Self-loathing whatever there are all these manifest obese. Um, you know to protect yourself. So for example, a lot of people are really overweight just because they never want to have a chance to be rejected in the first place but if so if they're just this big fat person. No 1 that'll never even happen. So you get so identified with this identity that it blocks out any potential for change and that's why any kind of change requires some sort of removal of material like you have to chip away. At the ego in order to make room for something new and different. |
| 34:51.53 | mikebledsoe | You know. |
| 34:57.42 | mikebledsoe | So aside from chipping away the ego and unlearning First what are some? What are some things that you put into a place I'm a big fan of your your five minute strategy. |
| 34:57.74 | Max Shank | The. |
| 35:11.97 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, yeah, there's sort of a quantum effect of 5 minute blocks because it feels easier to start psychologically and it's it's so easy for me to. |
| 35:13.44 | mikebledsoe | For learning new things. Can you explain that 1 |
| 35:31.81 | Max Shank | Just jump around from thing to thing and put stuff off. So if you do like usually five minutes the word just comes right before it. Oh it's just five minutes but ten minutes feels too long and with my mobility program I did five minute flow I get. So many versions of the same message which is hilarious which is you know I started doing five minute flows. But now I can't keep them under ten minutes I can't keep them under fifteen minutes and yeah |
| 36:05.94 | mikebledsoe | I've got a problem. How do we fix this? ah. |
| 36:08.90 | Max Shank | Right? Exactly? No, That's that's exactly the thing. It's a scam and I tricked. You guys. So haha I tricked you into getting started which is where the inertia is and once you start moving then it's really easy to keep going with regard to learning you don't. Want to practice a skill poorly. You're better off to take a break and come back and do it Again. Probably the biggest fallacy with this is within like the fitness thing. It's like you're pushing through. The the pain or pushing through the struggle or like you know, but you wouldn't do that if you were practicing shooting baskets or hitting golf balls. You would try to stay as fresh as possible and that's really 1 of the key elements for optimal learning. Is you. |
| 37:03.39 | mikebledsoe | I think. |
| 37:06.39 | Max Shank | Go in you do the thing total focus and then you pull away from it and then you go back in total focus and then you pull away from it and if you've ever done something where it requires total focus like tennis or fencing or fighting. Um, or even like ah a video game where you have to constantly either like move left or right let's say to avoid obstacles the ability to focus and not break that focus for a long period of time is something that you can practice as well. But you will. Improve that ability better if you take some small breaks. |
| 37:48.26 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the the increasing the capacity for focus the way that I like to approach that is I can tell when I'm losing focus. So. Um, working on I like to work on 1 task at a time I think that's important if people are trying to multitask they're they're so unfocused the whole time. They don't even realize when their their capacity for focus is going down because they just are starting so low already and what I like to do is set up a timer. And so I know that I can work if it's before noon I can do a ninety minute work session completely focused I use brain fm I use a bi neural beats type of thing to help me focus and my phone's on a timer. So the music will stop. When I'm supposed to stop my work and so most the time if it's before noon and I can work in ninety minute sprint I don't move out of my seat I'm in front of my computer and I am I am knocking out whatever needs to get knocked out and then the afternoons I noticed that. I don't have the same amount of juice might be seventy five minutes as the day goes on my my amount my periods of time of work separated by a break becomes shorter now. |
| 39:12.53 | Max Shank | So that's wisdom is knowing yourself and acting accordingly. |
| 39:16.92 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and what what got me there was I got into ah started getting into deep work zones which can take twenty thirty minutes to get into the the space of deep work the the amount of. Focus that you have is basically what I'm describing and that that level of focus can be achieved a lot sooner I can achieve that focus a lot sooner now because I've done it so many times I've gotten into that really deep work zones. So frequently that my my brain knows how it goes it says oh this is what we're doing now shut everything else out focus on this 1 thing and so when you get into this deep work zone enough. You can tell when your mind is starting to leave it. So. |
| 40:08.77 | Max Shank | Free. |
| 40:10.99 | mikebledsoe | when I when I'm reading something and I read the same paragraph 3 times you know I have to reread the email that I am going through or I you know I basically just start making mistakes mistakes or needing to repeat things to try to remember or whatever it is. Ah. I can so I'm watching my mind begin to drift and so what I've done is is instead of working through that empowering through that. What I've done is I go oh I gotta take a break I go for a walk I go check my mail which is you know quarter mile away I go. Take a nap I ah you know, go play with someone's dog. Whatever so. Ah, match gave me a good look. Ah so I I know when to take a break because the mind works very much so like muscles in the body and and you know in the fitness industry. It is very interesting that people have this tendency to. Push through the pain and basically practice shitty movement they practice moving poorly and they practice getting injured is what they're doing and so ah I think ah I think a large part of. That reason is because there are certain benefits to pushing to that point of failure but they are overemphasized in the fitness industry and then in addition to that people people just don't understand. What poor movement is and what good movement is and they don't understand they're they're practicing to get injured and then of course if you throw in something like Crossfit now you have this competitive competition component that is going to drive people to do things that they don't really they don't really have the capacity |
| 42:07.66 | Max Shank | Well, we've we've learned a false image of fitness I think so that's something really interesting about the things that you learn is you may very well have learned a false premise. So even if you do everything. |
| 42:08.40 | mikebledsoe | To do so. |
| 42:15.37 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 42:27.29 | Max Shank | Allegedly, correct if the entire if it's built on a false Premise. You're totally Screwed. You have like no chance of optimizing the amount of effort that you put in so with fitness For example. If Your athletic capacity is not increasing from your health and fitness practice or your movement practice. Whatever you're probably wasting your time I mean a lot of people use fitness as a way to burn Energy. With no rhyme or reason it's like putting too much gasoline on your in your car like overeating and then putting your car up on blocks and just running the engine. So It doesn't overflow. That's like 1 of the worst things you can do um because just like with investing. What you're sacrificing for doing that Bs is the chance to do something that could improve your overall capacity your ability to fight your ability to run your ability to play I mean Ah, that's the tricky thing about opportunity cost is you're sacrificing. Everything else you could be doing to do this. So If you're not enthusiastic about it. It's like dude, why? why bother there are plenty of good options and you know getting stuck into the whole thing about aesthetics is ah is another tricky thing. That's just based on. |
| 43:49.84 | mikebledsoe | Go. |
| 44:02.99 | Max Shank | What we've learned you know like I always joke about the aztec aesthetic which is like a big fat guy at the top of a temple watching the heads roll down like he was the best thing you could be a big fat guy and then you know over time sexy lady. Has changed from fat lady to thin victorian era plump and then we went through like the Ninety s or something where the supermodels weighed like 85 pounds and now we're kind of coming round to like thick is good again. So it's all. |
| 44:39.33 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 44:42.50 | Max Shank | It's all a matter of that individual perspective and that's why you can think of your focus like a lantern or a laser.. That's what I usually tell people is you can soften it like a lantern and that's for a martial artist may have heard the term soft eyes before. Like sometimes I'll practice while I'm juggling and I won't look at the balls I'll juggle but I'll be trying to take in as much other stuff as Possible. So I can focus right in your eyes right now or I can step back and I can be as aware as possible of everything else in the room. |
| 45:09.17 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 45:20.51 | Max Shank | And it's a really big difference in terms of how you focus so being able to cycle between those is extremely valuable because you don't want to always be laserfocused sometimes you want to have that wider perspective. Of what's going on and that's usually where joy and gratitude can come from is when you see the big picture rather than like oh my god my my life sucks compared to that guy over there and I hate that guy. He's got a nice, whatever and you know you get stuck. |
| 45:59.36 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 45:59.65 | Max Shank | Ah, tunnel vision right? So being able to zoom in and zoom out and realizing that your concepts of good and bad good and evil are are learned. You know, ah lions don't worry about that. Lions don't have a concept of good and evil they have a concept of danger from like other lions and they have a concept of hunger and that's it they don't have a concept of good and evil it's ridiculous. It's like totally a human invention I mean there are a lot of. Old stories that talk about that. What's that the wasn't that where eve ate the Apple wasn't it. The tree of the knowledge of good and evil so that the whole thing is just having this awakening that's crazy uncomfortable that. |
| 46:41.45 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 46:53.50 | Max Shank | Your whole idea of this is good and this is bad is just implanted from from the last guy |
| 46:59.48 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, are yeah I mean anything that's conceptual in nature that is that that we can't point at physically is usually passed down from from somebody else and. |
| 47:14.59 | Max Shank | Yeah, so if you focus on things that are intrinsically enjoyable then you will find the things that will make you the most enthusiastic you will naturally put more time into learning you'll. |
| 47:17.61 | mikebledsoe | Very interesting. |
| 47:33.24 | Max Shank | Be interested in learning the finer details. You know I sometimes I say it's not exactly true. But I think the sentiment is right? The only difficult thing is something you don't want to do if you want to do it then it doesn't matter. |
| 47:47.39 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 47:52.80 | Max Shank | Like you you would just want to do it and if you don't want to do it then it's probably going to be more difficult. So. |
| 47:53.43 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 47:59.67 | mikebledsoe | It's why people look at people doing a crossfi workout and go I can't I don't know understand how you do it? How do you push through whatever not realizing that that person is doing that workout loves doing that workout for whatever reason or they've at least learned to love the workout. |
| 48:11.80 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, um, well and sometimes you can sacrifice the temporary feeling for a bigger picture win like I actually never um, enjoyed lifting weights that much as weird as that might sound. Just did it because I wanted to be the most Alpha guy Possible. So now that I'm in a place where I'm a lot more honest with myself about what I'm doing just to get a result or what I'm enjoying I do a lot of weird stuff at the like I enjoy like explosive things like heavy lifting is like okay. Do some but I can play tennis for like 2 hours and I'm dying to play more tennis because it's so Fun. It's so engaging I'm using all these different skills. So That's intrinsically enjoyable to me but you know the idea of doing like a Crossfit workout. |
| 48:56.40 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 49:09.73 | Max Shank | I Don't even see the point of it for example so you change over time. |
| 49:11.51 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I Want to go 1 thing I Want to ah point out I mean you said a lot of really good stuff. There 1 is how you how you use your focus and how you can go from laser focus to that soft focus and I think about that as contraction and expansion. And if you spend too much time in contraction then you won't be able to expand very much if you if you spend too much time in that expansion. It's gonna be difficult to to concentrate that that attention. But um, being able to cycle between the 2 is gonna give you more capacity for each. So. The same way then analogy with um, you know somebody who's really athletic their muscle needs to be able to contract incredibly fast but also be able to relax incredibly fast so you got to be able to snap that muscle and it's got to be able to snap back into. |
| 50:01.41 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 50:08.33 | mikebledsoe | And to just relaxation and those are the people who are the most athletic have the most endurance all these things um and the same thing with with attention. Can you play? Can you go that soft focus. Can you go that that laser focus and I think about it just like breathing. You got an inhale and you've got an exhale. Got to spend time in either. So I do want to hit that and then the other thing you talked about is the false premise and it's very interesting because that's 1 of the things that I I see creates a lot of disagreement in the world is well 1 is. Which we talk about regularly which is semantics people just are they don't even realize that they're in disagreement about the meaning of words and so they think the word that someone else is using means something than what they intended it to be so um, it's that that's number 1 I think number 2 is and what we've witnessed over the last couple years is the premise in which people are coming from are different and they're arguing about stuff that's at the surface or they're focused on what's on the surface and not looking at the premise in which everything else is based. So. Ah, it's what's that's a term in Mathematics. Ah for for assumptions I forget what it is maybe it'll come to me but basically it's it's ah the premise that you know 2 plus because 2 plus 2 equals four then. All this other things and mathematics must be true because 1 plus 1 equals 2 that then means and so what I've what I've witnessed especially in like say so the scientific world and is ah. |
| 51:45.39 | Max Shank | Um, right? or. |
| 52:00.53 | mikebledsoe | We see these big shifts in how science is viewed when someone comes out and questions the validity of the premise in which we've been operating from and so ah, there's. |
| 52:14.57 | Max Shank | Often Those guys get burned at the stake historically speaking. |
| 52:18.95 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, they get historically speaking it. You do not be want to be the 1 that that ah challenges consensus. Yeah yeah, well, ah well that that's the other thing too is be be aware of of ah. |
| 52:25.51 | Max Shank | Um, don't kill the messenger I think we've heard before. |
| 52:38.25 | mikebledsoe | Consensus group think and anytime anyone uses the word is it Ah, who was it. Ah, the guy who wrote Jurassic Part Michael Crichton I you. |
| 52:46.69 | Max Shank | That guy is an animal I recommend anybody go listen to some of his talks Michael criton is a fucking animal. That's a genius. |
| 52:55.65 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, he you you sent me a video of his and I is an hour long talk and I ate it up. It was so good but he talks about how Consensus science is not science. It's. |
| 53:05.67 | Max Shank | Yo, ah. |
| 53:12.84 | mikebledsoe | Anyone who starts using the word Consensus science is actually anti. It's an anti-science concept. You can't state of fear is talk. Yeah, so you know just throwing that out. There is a warning anytime anyone starts using consensus science. Ah. |
| 53:17.75 | Max Shank | Um, it's called State of fear. That's the name of the talk I think I think so yeah. |
| 53:32.56 | mikebledsoe | That's that's when you know you should turn around and run. |
| 53:33.61 | Max Shank | Well, you got to consider the source. He also introduced me to a concept called gelmon amnesia which is where like you're an expert in fitness so you open up the paper and you read a fitness article and you're like this is totally false. This is ridiculous. But then. You forget that that was totally false so you read the rest of the paper as if it's true. It's like wait a second like fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me. |
| 53:56.45 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 54:02.42 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, but we have we have a whole world of people running around with false premise theyre running around with um that this is I'm not going to say that I know how all this works but there's 1 thing that I've noticed. |
| 54:09.61 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 54:21.90 | mikebledsoe | But you know I listen to people who are healthy so people who are healthy and have spent a lot of time thinking about these things long before the pandemic those are the people who I like to talk to and think about what they say but 1 1 premise would be germ theory versus Terrain Theory. And ah germ theory is a false premise because it's not even being considered a it's considered to be a fact versus the way it's being treated is it's not being treated as a theory. Ah, and that's 1 thing I'm noticing in society as a whole is that people are treating theories as if they're facts I was just I was just ah and this is how far I'll take it is I was watching a ah. My girlfriend was watching like an animals show is basically like Discovery Channel you know, looking at these cats and it starts off with eleven million years ago this predator descended into this region of the world and I go. Are they fucking serious. They just state that that like it was a fact I'm going I'm going No fucking wonder adults are running around the world acting like things are facts that are theories or that are just ideas presented by other people. Yeah, you may have a lot of evidence to suggest that but it's still a theory and so what we're experiencing right now is we have this mass adoption because because traditional or I'll say conventional medicine in the United States is based on germ theory When. Ah, the when if you were to just look through this pandemic through the lens of of terrain theory Everything that's being advised for people to do sounds insane. But. |
| 56:26.81 | Max Shank | Yeah, of course you got to be careful who your mentors are like with kind of bringing it back to learning like who do you trust? what's hilarious is that so many more people trust Joe Rogan than they trust any of the other people allegedly reporting on what's going on. |
| 56:29.76 | mikebledsoe | But if you. |
| 56:43.89 | mikebledsoe | M. |
| 56:46.27 | Max Shank | And there are so many premises that we've been talking about here's ah okay, like obesity for example, obesity rates are like through the roof so you could argue that most people kill themselves because obesity is like the easiest way to die quicker. From all causes whether it's diabetes, Heart disease etc like all that stuff. Um, if you're weak and fat. You die Faster. There's no question about that. But I think the biggest false premise is that we should run people through the same filter. That's exactly 1 of the reasons why school is so catastrophically bad like I don't think ah ah like about some things I'm like really dumb but about ah like I almost got held back in school like that's crazy when you think about it like I'm not like too dumb you know what? I'm saying. |
| 57:34.22 | mikebledsoe | M. |
| 57:41.46 | mikebledsoe | You're 1 of the smartest people I know so that. |
| 57:41.77 | Max Shank | So the whole nah I mean but I've only like read a few books isn't that all that matters. No I think smart is about how efficiently you can live the way you want to live like if you're living the way you want without expending a lot of energy then you're smart. Most people just want to. Ah, peer Smart I don't frankly give a flying fuck how I appear to people as long as I can live in an efficient and effortless way as long as I can move in efficient and effortless way and I think that's why people like fighting that's why I like it because it's very honest, you got a winner and you got a loser. You know I like playing tennis because it's honest I can't be like ah that ball was in no it was fucking out you missed bitch like try again. Ah so the the whole the whole premise that we should be run through the same filter is ridiculous. The whole premise of health is ridiculous. The whole idea that we should just blindly follow what a few people say we should is ridiculous like there's like a list that goes on and on I don't have it right in front of me but I wrote a bunch of the stuff that I thought was wrong about it down. But. I mean it's it's the same um as anything else. There are so many false premises out there that will lead you down a path because you can have a valid thought process and those are the 2 pillars of truth right? You have a true premise or false premise and you have a valid thought process. Or an invalid thought process. So a lot of the time you have a false premise with a valid thought process so it looks good. You're like yeah that that does like make like the logic make sense but because the premise is false everything else just goes completely out the window and that's. Kind of where I tie it back into where you put your faith or where you put authority into because when it comes to learning 1 of the quickest ways 1 of the best ways to learn is through a good teacher. But if you choose the wrong teacher. That is also a sure-fire way to fuck you up, you are going to inherit all of his ego bullshit I mean look have you ever seen youth sports probably like the parents and the coaches. |
| 59:54.20 | mikebledsoe | Here. |
| 01:00:03.44 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah. |
| 01:00:10.84 | Max Shank | Are doing a lot of harm to those little fuckers especially if they're trying to live out their dreams or like how about how about like a beauty Pageant Mom I mean when it comes to learning you got to really consider who you try to emulate like there are people out there who seem very healthy, Very joyful. |
| 01:00:11.35 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah. |
| 01:00:30.39 | Max Shank | And loving relationships and maybe they're not behind the facade so you got to you got to do some digging to really see like do I want to try to emulate. Do I want a monkey see Monkey do that person's life. It's a big deal. |
| 01:00:44.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that is a big deal. Ah so I I sat down on an airplane on Saturday and this really old indian guy that's down next to me. |
| 01:01:01.65 | Max Shank | Dot or feather. |
| 01:01:03.48 | mikebledsoe | And dot and ah he sits a real indian he sits down next to me like from India ah, he had the accent and everything you know he he spent some time India and pakistan and. |
| 01:01:11.84 | Max Shank | Yeah I get it. No, you're right. |
| 01:01:20.77 | mikebledsoe | Sits down he starts talking I mean he was referencing something things that were happening in the sixty s so this is how old this guy is and do you have to go? Oh maybe it was on my hand. Ah I think late. Anyways. |
| 01:01:28.30 | Max Shank | That wasn't on my end. |
| 01:01:40.32 | mikebledsoe | Um, I sit down. We start talking and I come to find out. He's a ah substitute teacher and in Florida and I was asking him all these questions about does he enjoy it. So um, by the way this guy had a stroke the month before so he was he was being a He was a little slow so I actually spent the flight helping him do things like open up his his chips and getting him to the bathroom and all these things but he sat there and just taught me shit the whole time. So. Ah, my girlfriend was blown away. She's like why did you like that guy I was like he was teaching me the whole time. Ah so 1 of the things he says is he goes you know what the problem with kids these days is I say don't know how to think they only know what they know and he says ah that. They believe that 2 plus 2 equals four which is true but they think that that's the only thing that equals four they don't realize that 3 plus 1 equal 4 this is the analogy he was using. You know they don't realize that 4 times 1 equals four. They only know that 2 plus 2 equals four. He says. |
| 01:02:50.40 | Max Shank | It's kind of. |
| 01:02:52.63 | mikebledsoe | They only know what they know they don't know how they got there and and and. |
| 01:02:56.58 | Max Shank | I Know exactly what you're talking about.. It's like a reflexive fear-based reaction to like hey don't worry I know don't worry I know they're like regurgitating stuff that they learned but they don't have like any kind of logical. Thought process that can help them discover something different or New. They don't have a set of tactics that can help them learn something better. |
| 01:03:23.95 | mikebledsoe | Right? So he said that and I go Wow. That's such a really simple way of explaining critical thinking versus whatever, whatever, not critical thinking would be but being a dumbass. Ah, is and so ah, yeah, if anyone been. |
| 01:03:47.61 | Max Shank | What's more important. What's more important you own a business I own a business. What's more important if you're going to hire somebody that they already know a bunch of things or that they have the ability to learn new things. |
| 01:03:54.80 | mikebledsoe | What. |
| 01:04:01.22 | mikebledsoe | Oh definitely the ability to learn new things. Um, well, there's there's 2 different types of employees. You got the people that that Mcdonald's is shopping for which is we just want people to be able to follow the steps. Yeah, we want robots. |
| 01:04:10.45 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 01:04:17.62 | Max Shank | Automatons. Yeah. |
| 01:04:20.35 | mikebledsoe | Um, and then you have you know Google executives Those people are hired because they're not going to. You know they're going to create the rules they're going to think of new things right. |
| 01:04:27.94 | Max Shank | They can see the big picture they can. They can think of what to do. It's like the difference between being a ah Master chef and a soou chef where you're just preparing the diced vegetables. |
| 01:04:40.20 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and the the problem is is we're we're closing out 2021 here in the next couple months and ah, all those jobs can be that don't require creativity are going away. They're being replaced by robots. Ah, those amazon jobs won't be around much longer truck truckers won't be around in 1015 years that won't be a thing and that makes a but lot of people that's a lot of employment so you know that we're 60000. |
| 01:05:16.63 | Max Shank | We'll probably go to more service business. |
| 01:05:18.99 | mikebledsoe | You know we're now 60000 ah truck drivers short in the United states as part of the you know? yeah I read. |
| 01:05:23.57 | Max Shank | I I didn't know that I met a guy who I thought was really dumb but he was actually really smart because he was like a pretty young kid when I was doing Moyai and he owned like 5 semi trucks by the time he was twenty 2 Did n't graduate high school and he started driving a truck and then he bought another truck and then he bought another truck and he just he was like retired he was like 25 years old is like it was great but he sounded dumb and about a lot of no, he really did. |
| 01:05:51.19 | mikebledsoe | Wow brilliant. |
| 01:06:00.36 | mikebledsoe | Well, he found his strategy. |
| 01:06:02.16 | Max Shank | Ah, nice guy exactly That's what I mean like you you don't want to compare everybody with the same measuring stick because however you measure yourself That's also going to be the same stick that you beat yourself with basically well which if you're into that I mean that's fine. But. |
| 01:06:08.13 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 01:06:19.37 | mikebledsoe | I've always thought of myself as quite the masochist so works out. |
| 01:06:25.54 | Max Shank | That's why we get along so well I'm a little more sadistic and you're a little more masochistic. |
| 01:06:27.42 | mikebledsoe | Am Yeah, you're the dom fits. |
| 01:06:31.64 | Max Shank | I Think everybody knew that already. |
| 01:06:38.24 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 01:06:38.28 | mikebledsoe | Ah, alright, let's wrap this bad boy up any any closing thoughts. Yeah. |
| 01:06:43.66 | Max Shank | On learning. Ah when it comes to learning the most important thing is that it's important to you that you use it and that you continue to use it and. When it comes to learning movement. Probably the thing that people miss the most is going super slow like even a super slow walk across the room. Super slow walk across the room with your eyes closed take the normal movements you do close your eyes try to do it as slow as possible. Try to do it as fast as possible. Try to change the angle a little bit and deliberately go outside of that normal range and there are a lot of other ways but I'll just keep it brief I would say maybe changing the speeds is like 1 of the most powerful ways. Especially really slowing down and. Consciously moving through the entire movement and then just be careful who you choose as a mentor for overall learning. |
| 01:07:44.74 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, love it. Yeah, stop listening to our show. Um, now you so. My my final thoughts are what what are your be intentional. So the best way to learn is to be intentional with each moment that goes by and that's something that's practicing itself but ask yourself why you're doing something so as max was talking about. Um, learning a new skill. Why am I why am I squatting today you know am I doing it fast am I doing it slow. Why always be in the why why you're doing something and the more time you spend in the intention and understanding the why. But when you're doing anything. Probably find yourself take more time take more care and the quality of that go up I think that quality is definitely the result of learning so that's all I got Appreciate. Conversation today max where can people find you. |
| 01:08:58.41 | Max Shank | Thank you brother I can be found at Maxshank Dot Com or at macshank everywhere you can Also Google me, there's also there's a ton of stuff out there. |
| 01:09:06.35 | mikebledsoe | Whatever you do don't get google my name. Ah it'll be you get a mixed bag of things you find me find me on Instagram at mike underscore blood. So and. |
| 01:09:15.46 | Max Shank | Don't really. If there was ever way to make people want to Google you that was it. |
| 01:09:25.00 | mikebledsoe | Ah Shh telling him my secret later yall love me max. |
| 01:09:31.43 | Max Shank | Love you buddy. |
| 00:00.00 | Max Shank | Welcome back to the Monday morning podcast with max and mike today we are going to talk about relationships because I don't know mike I've noticed that most people ruin their lives with just 1 or 2 bad relationships or maybe it becomes a pattern but. I think 1 of the biggest traps is to fall into the common way that people relate with each other especially with romantic relationships I'm sure you have some experience and have seen that as well. |
| 00:30.70 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think most people have we go back to their first relationship. They had their first girlfriend or first boyfriend. Whatever it is and probably for most people every person they've dated since that person has just been a new iteration of the same thing. They they'd likely relate to them the same way. They they find a lot of things that are in common in the beginning. It's really easy to overlook the the all the bad things. All the things that that may have gone south in your previous relationship because well you're. |
| 01:02.63 | Max Shank | To name. |
| 01:08.48 | mikebledsoe | You're on drugs when you're in love I'd say the first six months and. |
| 01:10.20 | Max Shank | No doubt so you think the first relationship sets the tone for all the rest of them. |
| 01:15.13 | mikebledsoe | I Think you I think your relationship with your father sets a tone for all your romantic relationships because when you're when you're born. |
| 01:24.32 | Max Shank | That explains why I go for beefy guys with big mustache. I was wondering what that was. |
| 01:32.20 | mikebledsoe | Ah, well this this is the framework I've been operating from over the last few years when when looking at relationships and that is when you're born you are. Ah yeah, it's your first love the so your mother. |
| 01:43.53 | Max Shank | I remember you telling me this you said your father is your first friend first relationship outside yourself. |
| 01:51.85 | mikebledsoe | When you yeah when you're born and you come out of your mother's womb you you were inside of her and then you should at least go to the breast pretty early after after being born and you really associate with your mother. So your mother really. Teaches you how to have a relationship with yourself and then your father is the first person outside of yourself that you have a relationship with so whether you're a man or a woman. He really sets the stage for ah how you relate to people and not necessarily just romantic relationships. Um, and ah I've also heard paul check talk about this which is you're usually ah attracted to a woman who has a similar body type to your mother. So if your mother had big breasts you probably are attracted to big breasts and so on and so forth I don't think that's always true but I imagine it's a fair. Fair assumption. So. |
| 02:48.95 | Max Shank | So so basically what you're saying is that the relationship you have with your dad and the physical appearance of your mom guides a lot of your selections in choosing a mate. |
| 03:04.82 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I would say people yeah people who haven't done a lot of work are more likely to just fall into those patterns. That's so I'm not saying this is an absolute. It's comfortable. It's safe. |
| 03:07.24 | Max Shank | From a very young age. |
| 03:14.00 | Max Shank | It feels comfortable. It probably that that makes sense it would feel what would feel more comfortable than someone who acts like your dad and looks like your mom. But. |
| 03:25.82 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah. Um, yeah, yeah, well well people people hate change right? And so well what they do is your parents really teach you how to relate to other people. They they teach you? How love looks you know people who grew up in a home where the parents are fighting all the time. Maybe there's physical abuse. |
| 03:30.77 | Max Shank | I mean I guess it's familiar of god. |
| 03:50.35 | mikebledsoe | And then they get an abuse of relationships. It's like well they don't They aren't experiencing love unless that experience is happening. Um and what's that. |
| 03:56.73 | Max Shank | I Think that takes us to the next phase really well which is how your parents romantic relationship looks to you because you're going to. You're going to probably copy that to a certain extent or you're at least going to say oh that's normal. |
| 04:08.41 | mikebledsoe | That's true. |
| 04:15.87 | Max Shank | So whether your parents are very cold and standoffish and not very affectionate toward each other or whether you live with a single dad who's just a casanova taking home a different lady every other Night. You're probably going to just mimic. That instinctually I guess or naturally you're going to mimic those behaviors. |
| 04:36.83 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and it's really interesting because a lot of people don't think that they are but they're out they the people on the outside looking in are going. Oh that's totally what you're doing but because it is so normal to people they don't They don't even see it. Ah yeah, it's ah. |
| 04:55.62 | Max Shank | Well you see ah some couples like look almost like carbon copies of each other too. You see a guy in a gal who look almost the same they look like they could be brother and sister. They're not in the cases that I'm talking I mean I know that happens sometimes but. |
| 04:55.64 | mikebledsoe | It's fascinating stuff. |
| 05:03.48 | mikebledsoe | Yet. |
| 05:12.62 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's ah, there's a name for that that I've seen a chart somewhere. It says like the different types of coupling that can occur and. |
| 05:14.38 | Max Shank | And the cases I'm talking about they just find someone who looks like them. |
| 05:26.85 | Max Shank | Man. |
| 05:29.39 | mikebledsoe | A lot of times if that type of coupling is occurring then you know there's likely ah a repetition of patterns. There's likely like gonna you're gonna feel really good about the relationship in the beginning but over time you may find dissatisfaction and I say may a lot here because I I don't. |
| 05:42.63 | Max Shank | Anyone. |
| 05:46.87 | mikebledsoe | There's no absolutes with all of this and ah 1 thing I Want to point out too is we're talking about what people learn from their parents which is different than what your parents taught you So what? a teacher intends for you to learn and what you receive it. These are different Things. So I like to keep that clear too because max said you said something that really stands out which is how you perceived your parents' relationship as how you're gonna be behave So as an adult what can happen a lot of times is. We intellectually look at our parents relationship or we look at the past and go oh that was not a big deal or I you know you can reason it away you can create reasons for and against why things were a certain way. But if you dig down deep enough which I've I've done a lot of that type of work where we deep dig. Deep down into what happened emotionally at a young age and people end up what we end up discovering is oh I learned this thing and I as I got older I intellectualized it away but it. But even though I intellectually intellectualized it away. |
| 06:51.96 | Max Shank | And. |
| 06:59.65 | mikebledsoe | It was still a pattern that was dominating my life. So I like to just bring that to people's awareness. Yeah, a lot of subconscious behavior. |
| 07:01.52 | Max Shank | Um, subconsciously subconsciously I think it's really important to distinguish between instinct and intellect. That's 1 of the main things I like to communicate with people is that you have these instincts that have. Basically nothing to do with your Upbringing. You're going to have an instinctual desire If. You're a man toward a female most of the time and so you're going to find a lot of ladies sexually desirable and your intellect is. Able to override your instinct but not all the time right? So you have things that are instinctual. |
| 07:41.73 | mikebledsoe | Well it depends on if you're It's probably how stressed how stressed you are in that moment or how much fear you're experiencing dictates the instinct versus intellect. |
| 07:51.28 | Max Shank | So it's like the pause between Impulse and action I guess because some things are instinctual and then some things are ingrained like I think beating your spouse is not an instinct but I'm I'm guessing. But if you. |
| 07:55.20 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 08:03.39 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 08:09.39 | mikebledsoe | I. |
| 08:09.86 | Max Shank | If you see your if you see your parents beating each other then that's going to be ingrained into you right? So you have the the pure instincts which is sexual attraction and ah probably ah, there's a sense of family there as well. Maybe. |
| 08:16.29 | mikebledsoe | Right? right. |
| 08:26.57 | mikebledsoe | Just me. |
| 08:29.12 | Max Shank | More nurturing on the side of females generally and then you have behaviors and patterns that are ingrained where you have these roles that each participant in a relationship plays and you're going to.. It's like you were saying you know you don't. Necessarily do what your parents tell you you don't do what your teachers tell you you just either copy them or you try to do the opposite mostly right, right? What what you see. |
| 08:53.77 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, it's what you learn from them. Not what they try to teach you? Yeah all right? So we covered super early development in regard to relationships which is a good foundation. |
| 09:05.20 | Max Shank | I Think it's good. We have we have like a right? So then we move on into relationships should we go to relationships because that's probably I think we don't need to go into like. |
| 09:17.88 | mikebledsoe | I want to let everyone know we're we're ten minutes in his show while them know we're gonna talk about how to pick up chicks at some point in this just ah so people keep paying attention. |
| 09:24.91 | Max Shank | Oh yeah, so here's what you do you? Ah you spend like 10 years getting into really good shape and getting really rich and then the rest of it doesn't matter or or another option. |
| 09:39.71 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 09:43.41 | Max Shank | You can just ah, go up and and talk to girls that you're interested in and actually be interested in them. |
| 09:50.20 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that's the key. Well I think most guys I'm gonna talk about guys because I think we're more of an expert on men than we are women. |
| 09:57.87 | Max Shank | Are we gonna talk about are we gonna talk about the pedestal today. We we we got to talk about the pedestal today I can tell I you and I are on the same like wavelength I've been there I've done it too. |
| 10:02.62 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, we can talk about the pedestal. We got to talk about the pedestal. Actually I what I was about to say kind of leads into that. Yeah. |
| 10:17.84 | Max Shank | I've put ladies up on this high pedestal. Not healthy, not healthy to do that. |
| 10:18.43 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well now I forgot what I was gonna say so yeah, well when we get in our our first relationships ah man women are just so ah I would say a lot of. What got me in my first relationships is me me trying to. |
| 10:38.16 | Max Shank | Like holding the pause button women are so oh God What's even do. |
| 10:47.43 | mikebledsoe | Um, so like when I when I first started why it totally didn't know it at the time but I looked back at my childhood and and the girls and it was it was all about you know. Making myself feel loved like I wanted to feel loved. So I you know would go after I like need to go after the prettiest girl I wanted to go after the same girl that everybody else was going after. Um, there was yeah yeah, then everyone would worship me which is not completely inaccurate. |
| 11:17.60 | Max Shank | Then we would all like you. |
| 11:25.32 | mikebledsoe | I Mean if you date if you're with someone that a lot of people want to be with that does raise your status I've witnessed this I've I've had that experience. |
| 11:30.10 | Max Shank | You get a lot of fifth bumps from strangers. Um, you like my man get look at hit him. |
| 11:39.95 | mikebledsoe | Actually I was like I had that experience forty 8 hours ago or you know 36 hours Saturday night I was out. Yeah, my my girlfriend gets up from the table. He gives me a fist bump like yeah and. |
| 11:49.20 | Max Shank | Right? You automatically get street cred and why is that it's because women are Judgmental. That's I think that's the word you are looking for is women are very Judgmental now before before I'm crucified. Let me qualify that with that's just. |
| 11:59.81 | mikebledsoe | I. |
| 12:08.42 | Max Shank | The way of animals generally Speaking. We do a little dance show you our pretty feathers and we're like hey look at this nest I Made what do you think and you're like they're taking notes like okay, he's got a 8 out of 10 on nest building. Nice flowers. Nice feathers I like your bird song. Okay I'll accept your your dna we can name so that's but that's the same word. That's the same thing but but. |
| 12:31.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it well they have ah they have discernment. For instance, my my girlfriend she is yeah similar I think Judgment judgment carries. Ah to me that if we're getting in the semantics as we do. Ah ah. |
| 12:46.57 | Max Shank | We have to. |
| 12:50.19 | mikebledsoe | Judgment comes with it a making wrong a it. It becomes so um, a moral a moral issue whereas something may not be good enough for this specific thing but it doesn't make you a bad person for instance like I'm not in ah I'm not in ah to blonde women. It's not. |
| 12:53.53 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, pass or Fail. Um. Um, so I feel like yeah. |
| 13:09.86 | mikebledsoe | Because blonde women are are bad. It's just because it's not my I discern against that for what that's a poor example I should probably pick something that's more of like a behavior trait and a look but women are discerning Well I say that I say that because my girlfriend is way more discerning than I am. |
| 13:14.14 | Max Shank | Right? I think I think discern. Yeah I think discernment is a good word. They discriminate. Women are way more discerning than men are generally speaking I don't think that I'm telling any tales out of school with that comment I think most of the things totally but wouldn't you say that most of the crazy things that guys do are. |
| 13:28.50 | mikebledsoe | And social situations. |
| 13:33.17 | mikebledsoe | Well this is this is where being being with a woman and listening to her is a superpower keeps me out of lot of trouble. |
| 13:45.13 | Max Shank | Mostly to attract women I mean nobody yeah no, that's what I'm saying nobody's this is like the core of the thing for all the fell is listening I mean the whole reason. Ah, you try to get 6 pack abs is because you want some lady to go oh look at him I like that whole reason you buy. |
| 13:45.96 | mikebledsoe | Almost everything. |
| 14:04.89 | Max Shank | A crazy fancy car is to you know, convince or Persuade or appear to a potential mate as if you are, you're qualified. You meet the parameters for like yeah I'll get with that guy. Otherwise why would you be getting fist bumps. And it's weird because guys are usually valued on what they can provide and girls are usually valued on what they are. |
| 14:32.52 | mikebledsoe | I like to look at it as men are are valued for ah hold value for success and women hold value for Beauty is is what I've typically noticed which is similar to what you're saying. But. |
| 14:49.44 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 14:52.42 | mikebledsoe | But I think those are the primary things that people are like men are judging women on Beauty and that's why you see so many old rich dudes with with young hot girls. It doesn't go the other way around. Yeah yeah, so it's um, you know for young men out there. |
| 14:55.60 | Max Shank | Here. |
| 15:01.81 | Max Shank | It's because it's because wealth compounds and Beauty deteriorates. |
| 15:11.63 | mikebledsoe | It might be a little rough. Um, but I don't think it has to I Just think it it tends to be. |
| 15:13.78 | Max Shank | I I don't think so I think if you have I think it's probably the best time to just be a little bit courageous because I would say that by and large men are becoming very weak very fragile. Emotionally. And if you're just willing to have the courage to ask for what you want and ask ladies out and be that male masculine Archetype it. It'll be like shooting fish in a barrel I think. |
| 15:47.54 | mikebledsoe | It it really is when I was living in San diego um I was living in a part of town where it was a very like just had a feminine essence. You actually you live there so you know, um, but I'm taught. Yeah. |
| 16:00.51 | Max Shank | I Do I live in a very feminine place. |
| 16:05.61 | mikebledsoe | It's ah ensonnitos california very feminine. It's very laid back easy going a lot of the men there I think max max and I were probably 2 of the 2 out of maybe five masculine men in the whole town which does which. I wonder how many guys in Nsonitas are listening to this show which does make it feel like shooting fish in a barrel because I know I know for you I I imagine it's fairly easy to find good looking women and I know I definitely had that experience when I lived there. Um, and it was easier there than say awesome texas where there's a lot of there's a lot more bravado here. There's more masculinity here. So if you're going to out masculine another dude like you know you better have 5 million in your bank account in a and a fast car. Yeah. |
| 16:57.78 | Max Shank | Just got back from a bull riding competition. You got a 10 pound belt buckle that sort of thing. |
| 17:03.67 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, you need guns and trucks and land. These are the things and big houses. But ah yeah, it's different. So like if you just have if you just and and embody that masculine energy like you're saying. |
| 17:09.60 | Max Shank | Right? It's totally different thing I think that. |
| 17:21.51 | mikebledsoe | Most of society has gotten soft and so if you're able if you're if you're a stronger not just physically stronger. But you're emotionally strong Mentally, you're developed. You're if you're developed in these ways in a in a masculine way. Yeah, women will come flocking. It'll be hard to keep them away. |
| 17:41.38 | Max Shank | Um, well and I think the the biggest thing in my opinion is ah approaching it from an abundance mindset instead of a scarcity mindset like if you ask a lady out and she says no and you get emotionally crushed to the point that you don't ask any more ladies out. That's not good if you get into any relationship at all just because you're afraid you won't be able to find anyone else who likes you. That's not going to work at all That's going to be a scarcity mindset too and I think the same thing happens with guys. Staying in relationships is because they are living in a scarcity mindset where they're like oh I'll I'll never find anyone else and so you have to become resilient to the word. No. Because it's not just about getting every lady to say Yes, it's about having your request be like a filter so you find someone who resonates with you and I'm talking more about like who you actually want to spend time with than just sex I don't think. I Don't think it's too valuable for for us to just like teach people how to like hook up with random people at the bar I think that's simple and straightforward enough. |
| 19:03.51 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and with all the apps out there now I think it's pretty easy and if you can write some good copy on your tinder account I think you'll be just fine. Yeah. |
| 19:11.58 | Max Shank | Right? Just buy a puppy and be rich and you're be fine. |
| 19:19.63 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, so being in a satisfying relationship. That's interesting. 1 thing I want to cover that I'd like to address here is ah and if there's any ladies left by this point that this would be. They're gonna love hearing it but the way I the way I look at it is women pretty much. |
| 19:32.87 | Max Shank | They're gone. |
| 19:38.47 | mikebledsoe | Drive We We already said this drive all male behavior like women are in charge when women start complaining that that men are in charge home going. You lost you don't you don't see what's going on here men make money because. Want to attract women all these things but I think it comes From. It's an evolutionary thing where you know it used to be the biggest strongest guy was the 1 who got the woman and it was the you know got to where it they you started being judged on your intellect and I think that. |
| 20:03.98 | Max Shank | Um, a. |
| 20:15.19 | mikebledsoe | That's there's a big argument for that's what's driven the evolution of consciousness is the more you can develop your intellect as a man the more more valuable you'll become and the more status you'll have So it's I think so I think so but but. |
| 20:26.94 | Max Shank | Um, is it because you can provide more though I think so too. |
| 20:34.27 | mikebledsoe | And which way can you provide big strong can kill shit protect or do the same exact thing because you're you're loaded with a bunch of money and and you know how to use it. |
| 20:43.26 | Max Shank | Way more. The latter nowadays you know like your your martial arts capacity is like the last thing on most ladies minds number 1 |
| 20:48.26 | mikebledsoe | Nowadays. Yeah, that's where we got. |
| 20:59.31 | Max Shank | A guy with 20 years of martial arts experience will lose to a guy with 1 day of firearms experience. So there's almost no point in being big and strong from a self-defense standpoint whatsoever and the likelihood of any physical violence is so low you can create way more. Force and power you have more power just being able to write a check and being able to use language. Well. |
| 21:22.75 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, people want to get along people deep down they they avoid conflict most so I I don't mind conflict I I find it fun. It's like a little bit of. |
| 21:38.47 | Max Shank | I disagree on you're wrong. |
| 21:41.52 | mikebledsoe | I fuck with it a bit and I noticed I noticed that a lot of people there. A lot of people are not that way. Ah y'all start I'll step into a conflict and people fold really quick. Um, and I'd I'd say I run into ten percent of people out there. Okay, with conflict other people. |
| 21:53.49 | Max Shank | The. |
| 22:01.39 | mikebledsoe | They they just want to avoid it at all costs I think I think you're right like it's it's safety in 2021 physical safety. It's pretty. You know, not saying that violence can't happen but have a gun there. You go no. |
| 22:13.14 | Max Shank | Yeah, it's rare. Yeah, you don't need to be like super buff. Most ladies don't care because that has changed right? The aesthetic over time for women has changed the desirability of men has totally changed. |
| 22:29.29 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, they like skinny guys now like being skinny is in which was when I was a kid that was the last thing you wanted to be. Yeah. |
| 22:38.14 | Max Shank | Not no, you were so it was called Scrawny back Then. And and ladies I mean it used to be. They were supposed to be plump like Victorian Era type of thing and then we had some stuff happen a little thicker well and then it. |
| 22:52.92 | mikebledsoe | Ah, well up until Marilyn Monroe Marilyn Monroe was she's a thick woman and then. |
| 23:05.25 | Max Shank | Swung back around to like the supermodel phase of the Ninety s where you have 6 with tall women who weigh 1 hundred pounds and you're like oh my god like it looks like skeletor right? and then now I think it's kind of circled back around to the thick ladies. |
| 23:13.69 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 23:20.56 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I'm loving that I yeah I need a little I don't like him too skinny I tried I tried the 2 skinny ones didn't wasn't as pleasurable. Be honest, got to try it all out. Yeah yeah. |
| 23:33.22 | Max Shank | You got to find out what you like you got to find out what you like that's it. Um, it does sort of circle us back to if you're ready to talk about how to choose the right person I mean we can. |
| 23:40.36 | mikebledsoe | Take a 1 more little meat on her bones. You know. |
| 23:48.20 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah, we should? Yeah, we we just. |
| 23:52.64 | Max Shank | We could just talk about what ah physical traits we like in ladies but just watch all the female listeners just slowly go away if you're a lady and you made it past me saying women are judgmental then I so. |
| 23:57.74 | mikebledsoe | Ah, all right, all right? Ah I'll let you. |
| 24:11.92 | Max Shank | really support that thank you that's really nice ah yeah thank you for the support. Ah so it comes back to that scarcity idea. It's possible to just date 1 lady and have her be the 1 and. |
| 24:13.10 | mikebledsoe | Thank you for the support ladies. Yeah. |
| 24:31.12 | Max Shank | Get married and have a family would you say that's a little bit risky. |
| 24:36.41 | mikebledsoe | Boy it doesn't sound like you're diversifying your portfolio seems like an all eggs in 1 basket. |
| 24:40.48 | Max Shank | well well I mean all your eggs in 1 basket is more like the argument for being polyamorous I just mean like sampling sampling different personality types. |
| 24:54.97 | mikebledsoe | Ah, ah before you before you go into a marriage. |
| 24:59.85 | Max Shank | Yeah, because I think having ah a relationship can be 1 of the best things ever or possibly the worst thing ever. That's why I think it's such a good topic because there's that saying behind every ah. |
| 25:09.64 | mikebledsoe | Well. |
| 25:16.37 | Max Shank | Great man is a strong woman I'm guessing a woman came up with that quote had to have been right? but but also behind every like broken suicidal man is 1 or many women who made his life miserable now it's probably his own fault. But I'm saying is. |
| 25:30.31 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 25:35.78 | Max Shank | Both ways. Male female. A relationship can be like a crazy boost that defies the laws of physics or it can be ah like a poison that you take every day. |
| 25:50.68 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, totally agree. |
| 25:52.60 | Max Shank | I mean I've seen it I've seen it both ways and how can you choose? Well if you don't interact with multiple types of person. |
| 26:04.80 | mikebledsoe | Well this is this is a really big challenge because I don't think people really appreciate how long we as human beings have been choosing our marriage partners. It's like 100 years old I think prior. The further back you go the more arranged marriages you're going to see and americans I think have probably been on the cutting edge of choosing your your mate ah to the rest of the world. Ah, and ah the wealthy. You know I think kept it around longer than the poor I think the poor were more into choosing than the wealthy the wealthy were you know is all part about it was playing a role in joining together families. And yeah, political and financial. So so this idea of you choosing a mate. |
| 26:51.95 | Max Shank | It's poor political. |
| 27:01.43 | mikebledsoe | Is is very very interesting because it's it's new it choosing your mate is new and then not only that the amount of choices I went on bumble and it's it's overwhelming I mean I I would sit there and I could swipe through. Ah, hundred women in five minutes and you know rewind a hundred years or further back ago and that might have been how many women you've ever met in the first twenty years of your life. You know you may have met your. |
| 27:33.60 | Max Shank | That there are times where you wouldn't meet a hundred women who weren't your family members. |
| 27:39.00 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, and so like this idea that we now get to choose a mate and previously it was like you know what you get the the cards you were dealt. It's kind of like your looks right? It's like oh your face looks like that you're stuck with that rest of your life. Think that's how ah marriage was probably seen back then is yeah, you're just going to marry this person or you know you get out of these 3 women. You're probably going to you know, end up with 1 of them might as well start courting and so I only bring that up because. You know if we look at the generations if I look at all right? My dad definitely picked my mom and they met from different sides of the country. Um, they came together in 1 spot but were were nowhere near each other they they had a lot of options but then I look at my my dad's dad grew up in a town of four hundred. my dad grew up in a town of four Hundred he's like fortunate like he was on that cusp of he left his hometown in his late teens for adventure and found my mom now my grandfather was a town of. |
| 28:48.69 | Max Shank | I. |
| 28:54.18 | mikebledsoe | 400 and married a woman from that talent at 400 right so he probably his the amount of choices he had was probably you know a dozen you know. |
| 28:55.18 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 29:05.72 | Max Shank | It's probably a lot more clearly defined gender roles within a marriage at that time too though. |
| 29:09.96 | mikebledsoe | That as well and if you look back at his father who the fuck knows like they they had such so I only I bring all that up to to create this context and give ourselves a little bit of grace for. If we're if we seem like we're not not max and I I mean we can give us grace too but give yourself grace if you're fumbling around in relationships a bit because most of the things that are happening in relationship are new choosing a mate for yourself. That's new without having parents heavily. Ah. |
| 29:49.53 | mikebledsoe | Influencing it. So yeah I just bring that up because give ourselves some grace and we're all learning and I think it's a skill that you're gonna have to get even better at in the future because choice is only going up. |
| 30:01.35 | Max Shank | Well I think that is a really good point that you are always learning and so people change within the course of a relationship and that relates to what we're talking about with arranged marriages like right now. I'm pretty sure you could fact check me on this I'm pretty sure that right now it's still common plaque common practice in some parts of india to marry off your 12 year old daughter to a 30 year old dub. |
| 30:30.61 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, was it up? Well yeah I think so well I saw a news story Yesterday a girl in Afghanistan was a 12 year old girl was sold for two thousand dollars in afghanistan and you know it's probably propaganda from cnn basically. Trying to make the taliban look like a bunch of dicks which they probably are a bunch of dicks. But um, anyways I don't think that's specific to the taliban I think there's just a bunch of dudes out there a bunch of dicks. But ah. |
| 30:49.93 | Max Shank | That seems really cheap. |
| 31:01.26 | Max Shank | Well I think that's ah sort of what we're talking about you know? ah a lady has that intrinsic value. You couldn't sell like a boy for that price. Probably. |
| 31:17.43 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, women are gonna be more expensive are gonna cost more has more value there. So. |
| 31:24.80 | Max Shank | So okay, we're into arranged marriages which is like hey this is just how it is and there was no concept of divorce and then you know the story of King James King James bible. |
| 31:42.34 | mikebledsoe | Nah. Thanks! So yeah, please tell it? yeah. |
| 31:42.88 | Max Shank | 1 of my favorite stories ever he but you know he's a he's Good. Ah Catholic guy I Want to say Catholic Christian something like that he was He was hip with the bible and then he was married to this lady. He's like fuck I got to get out of this thing and they're like sorry church doctrine says no go and he's like we're gonna have to rewrite this book and so and so they did now you have the the King James bible which is like yeah divorce is okay Now. And I think that's hilarious I think that it's okay to play it either way. It's okay to want to stick it out and try to make it work and it's also okay to be thankful that for the time that you had with somebody. |
| 32:21.67 | mikebledsoe | To what. |
| 32:36.62 | Max Shank | And and move on with your life I think it's I think it's important to understand that people do grow in different ways. So this whole idea of till death to us part is like a really good idea. It. It seems meaningful but also I mean people do. Change people go through midlife crisis people go through just constant evolution and people grow differently sometimes sometimes you grow the same get intertwined and sometimes you grow in polar opposite directions and you have nothing left in common anymore. |
| 33:08.22 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I'll throw in my ah I'll throw in a vulnerable share of the day. So the ah so I was made for 9 years huh |
| 33:19.90 | Max Shank | You're bisexual. What's that huh. |
| 33:25.50 | mikebledsoe | I was married for 9 years and so greedy bunch of bastards just pick aside. Um so I'm actually really jealous of of people can go both ways. Oh yeah. |
| 33:30.17 | Max Shank | Bisexual is just greedy so greedy double dipping not cool man. |
| 33:43.57 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, it's greedy. It's amazing. Yeah. |
| 33:45.22 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, they have double the opportunity. Yeah so I was made for 9 years and ah, you know we we so parted ways about 2 and a half years ago now. Um. Ah, when when I got married I don't think she's gonna listen to this I'll I'll over share a bit but we'll see yeah, ah, when we were first married like. |
| 34:10.80 | Max Shank | This will be the first 1 She listens to no question. |
| 34:21.83 | mikebledsoe | We were a certain type of person I I know ah she was full of Insecurity I was full of Insecurity I was ah fairly I was very stressed out all the time I was ah yeah I was. I was fearful around relationships specifically I had a scarcity mentality I you know I I look back and and you know I made some decisions based on the wrong reasons and the reason I did that is because nobody can I never heard anyone tell me the right reasons you would want to be married. |
| 34:57.87 | Max Shank | And. |
| 34:59.60 | mikebledsoe | Like I I remember growing up in church and hearing things but like now that I'm forty was married for 9 years and I'm in ah, a really ah relationship I'm stoked about for a year and a half and now I can see I can see things so much clearly now and. And the advice that I would give somebody who's 25 or what was I was 27 when I got married twenty eight the advice I would give that person is no 1 gave me the advice I would give me now and but so some of it has to do with. Who you're surrounding yourself with and this before podcast before I get all enlightening shit. But ah so so enlightened. Yeah, yeah, that's usually it. Ah so ah. |
| 35:42.46 | Max Shank | So enlightened. That's what all the enlightened people say I'm I'm just so enlightened. |
| 35:56.82 | mikebledsoe | So I look back and go Wow! It's just a lot of core wounding. There's like a lot of lot of emotional wounds. A lot of insecurity that was driving a lot of the decisions during that time which made us a perfect couple we were we were meant to be together. We matched lock and key. |
| 36:08.73 | Max Shank | You matched Harm eyes. Yeah. |
| 36:14.25 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, like she she had like the ways in which I showed up for her was probably how she wished her dad would show up for her and and so on and so forth and so over the years the relationship it was 1 of those things where as we. Healed a lot of those wounds and didn't have the same insecurities popping up and and a lot of that just didn't matter anymore. You know, certain things didn't bother me anymore and I and I was open to more of my own desires versus what I was scared of losing and. During that time. We also improved our communication skills. We went to workshops and improved how to communicate I attended relationship workshops I did a lot of a lot of my personal development was how to improve relationships in general and so while. While I was in a relationship that what bound us together began to dissolve I also was getting better at relationships. So it was. It was like the relationship would get hard and then would get easier and so I was in this I was in this relationship I was like oh that is really hard. Don't know if I can make it. |
| 37:15.17 | Max Shank | Live. |
| 37:30.00 | mikebledsoe | And then I learned some way new way of relating and I changed something about myself and then like oh now we're jam and this is great and then we'd hit another hard stop and it really I got to the point where I go oh that that the core thing that has been binding us together for so long that's gone and. |
| 37:45.92 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 37:48.77 | mikebledsoe | Now it's about just trying to make this relationship work because we've been in it for so long and so yeah, yeah, and um, you know and when I when I left that relationship there. It took me. |
| 37:54.23 | Max Shank | Sunk cost policy. |
| 38:07.79 | mikebledsoe | It's been 2 and a half years it has not been that long for a nine year relationship 2 and a half years is not that long. So I still It's like every day that goes by I experience this less. It's almost nothing. It's probably a few times a week at this point, there's this guilt that may come up it. It. Kind of like this question comes up with could I have done something differently or could I have been a different way or I see myself in my current relationship where I'm doing things for her that my ex wanted me to do for her but I just didn't do. |
| 38:39.77 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 38:43.87 | mikebledsoe | Or I was for for some reason I was incapable in that moment and even though I tried and now I'm witnessing myself. Do it with ease and then I feel a little bit of guilt like oh why is it that I can do this so easily now it's so difficult then um, and so it's It's a very interesting thing to have. |
| 38:50.94 | Max Shank | Yeah, yeah. |
| 39:02.44 | Max Shank | That's a big deal. |
| 39:03.58 | mikebledsoe | Been and yeah, been in a nine year relationship and be able to look at it and go oh yeah, and and I'm very fortunate because when I left the relationship. You know there was there was a good year where a little over a year we were working on it before we split like we was we we knew that we this was a possibility. |
| 39:16.11 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 39:22.73 | mikebledsoe | And ah yeah, what I what I made sure of when I loved that relationship is I didn't want to bring any of the bullshit into the next relationship or go you know what I need to make sure that I'm I like clean here I don't want. Ah. |
| 39:33.12 | Max Shank | Whatever. |
| 39:42.38 | mikebledsoe | Even though we we still ended up splitting I had to make sure that it wasn't me. It wasn't like something that was 1 hundred percent me that was that was the problem because I knew that that would just show up in the next relationship and I don't want to do that to somebody else and so ah so i. Um, in my my experience I largely did that and then splitting up I had a year where I really focused on myself and I did date a little bit but man a lot of lessons there too. |
| 40:12.71 | Max Shank | Yeah I think that guilt that you were talking about is really um, it's nice that you feel comfortable sharing that I've definitely felt that myself. Basically every relationship I've ever been in is I Always think what I could have done differently whether it's a. |
| 40:27.76 | mikebledsoe | Um, a. |
| 40:31.51 | Max Shank | Business relationship or romantic relationship. Ah professional project was just telling someone the other day that as soon as I finish teaching a course I think of like 10 things I wish I had done different as soon as I finished launching a product I'm like oh God should have done this this and this different as soon as the relationships. And I'm like oh man I could have done this this and this and you you got to be kind to yourself and recognize that you're doing the best you can with what you got based on how you think and feel at the time you know and so it's important not to drag any of the Bs along with you. |
| 40:52.23 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 41:03.28 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, so. |
| 41:10.22 | Max Shank | But you still want to remember those lessons So I'm really appreciative of all the relationships that I have had and I try to keep the lessons that I've learned and I try to focus on the things that I did like because then you also have a good frame of reference. For whatever relationship you're in now and you know you don't want to get into like comparison syndrome or something like that. But it's good to know. Um what you like and what you don't like and get comfortable drawing drawing boundaries and saying this is what I'm willing to um trade off or sacrifice. For what I'm willing to give what I'm willing to get out of a relationship. What I'm looking for in a relationship and I think that maybe the most important thing to realize is if you can't say no then you're basically a slave like if you can't say. You can't say no to something then you're you'll just be eroded over Time. So You're not really yourself. |
| 42:10.41 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, that. |
| 42:26.23 | mikebledsoe | I'll find the thought. |
| 42:38.44 | Max Shank | Yeah I think it's natural to judge ourselves especially when a relationship ends any anytime something finishes I think it's normal to say like oh what could I have done different. It's also probably common to viciously attack the character of the other person and say it's all their fault. |
| 42:48.71 | mikebledsoe | Well probably. |
| 42:56.90 | mikebledsoe | I Think that's the most common. Yeah, that's more common than yeah I mean's a mix of both I'm sure but you know we we can judge our previous self harshly because we've learned the lesson now we didn't know then where we didn't know it well enough then. |
| 42:57.47 | Max Shank | So you don't want to get into that trap either. |
| 43:09.21 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 43:14.10 | mikebledsoe | To take action on it or you didn't know how to do it. But after the fact you look back and go I know how to do that and then that's another reason to to give yourself a little bit of grace but you were digging into boundaries and um, yeah, the boundaries has been 1 of the most important things. Oh yeah, what I would that remind me of. Is well we can talk about boundaries later. But what I want to dig in here based on what you were just saying is when I said hey I want to I want to reengage with my dating life again and which I mean in my first marriage I was also dating other women. |
| 43:45.80 | Max Shank | The. |
| 43:52.29 | mikebledsoe | It was completely open. We were completely transparent about it. It was so it wasn't like I had gotten back up now the way I approached dating was very different. It felt very different from you know when I was married it was just like okay I'm gonna go have fun with this person when I was single it was like. |
| 44:02.75 | Max Shank | The. |
| 44:11.38 | mikebledsoe | I Had this experience of oh this could be something more and so it's like the pressure went up on it to a degree where which was surprising to me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was actually interesting to watch myself. Ah, yeah, Wow I actually desire to be in a relationship. |
| 44:17.56 | Max Shank | Right before it was a play date before it was a play date Now you're playing for keeps. Basically. |
| 44:29.37 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 44:31.27 | mikebledsoe | Ah, and so ah, what I did was I I was sitting with my coach at the time he's actually in Encinitas and he says to me. Ah well,, you're very interested in women even though you're you're newly divorced and. All that you seem to attract women pretty easily and you like being in a relationship you like to be with women like yeah, that's all Accurate. He goes well I would write down what it is you want in a woman and because basically. I was working with him during you know all that leading up to my divorce and afterwards and what he saw was when you're when you're breaking away from a relationship. It is very difficult to see what it is. You do want you? you primarily see all the things you don't want or what you don't like. |
| 45:25.87 | Max Shank | The. |
| 45:27.76 | mikebledsoe | Like I want out of this I don't want this anymore and so it was I remember it was very hard for me to shift the gears into focusing on what I did want from a woman or maybe not from her but ah of a woman versus what I didn't want. And the list of didn't was so you can translate this the the list of don't wants can really inform you your do wants you can make all your list of like I don't want this this and this and go what's the opposite of that. So um, that's how I started I started I was like you know what? I don't want all this shit. |
| 45:59.55 | Max Shank | 10 |
| 46:06.70 | mikebledsoe | So I do want this and what I did was I swung really hard and I went to the other side of the spectrum and and then dated a woman who was the opposite of my ex and in a lot of ways. Um, and. |
| 46:19.40 | Max Shank | And. |
| 46:23.69 | mikebledsoe | And my coach even I remember got a chuckle at it's like dude you you just went the other direction hard like how's that going I'm like I'm loving it and then crash and burn is like no I don't love that and I realized that there were a lot of traits that I thought were valuable and this is going back to your your point early on which is. |
| 46:27.61 | Max Shank | No. |
| 46:42.76 | mikebledsoe | Good to try out a lot of different types of people when dating and looking at different. You know what type of personality traits all this stuff. There was a lot of things that I imagined that I desired. But for instance I desired a woman that was ah like financially independent I wasn't going to need to take care of them all this kind of stuff. So I ended up dating a woman who made like 2 to 3 times the amount of money I was making and it was It was really exciting I was like oh cool like I don't have to cover everything and she doesn't mind this and that and I get to go have lavish experiences and. |
| 47:14.42 | Max Shank | And. |
| 47:19.66 | mikebledsoe | Fivestar hotels and all this shit Ca Bana Boy Mike Yeah, so and I make good money so like ah for her to make triple like she's banking. She's you know? and so I but then I was like oh the emotional availability of this person is just nothing. |
| 47:21.45 | Max Shank | Cabana Boy mike. |
| 47:39.10 | mikebledsoe | And I was like oh I I didn't have that written down because it was just a like to me I think it was probably a given but I wasn't focused on it consciously so I wasn't choosing it. So then I go you know what I don't care. She doesn't have to be filthy rich she ah because I actually put down the intention I Want to date someone who makes more money to me. |
| 47:44.38 | Max Shank | And. |
| 47:56.93 | Max Shank | I Thought that was gonna be your advice for the listeners is just marry a rich girl. Ah. |
| 47:59.50 | mikebledsoe | And. Um, yeah, well, you know if she's self-made that could be a good thing if she's not good luck. Um, because I've I over the years I I dated some ah some rich girls when I was younger I was like in my teens but ah what a pain. So what I did was I kept refining my list I kept refining and writing down like what I wanted in a woman and then I got to a point where well I then went celibate for seven months. The first hundred days was on purpose and then. The rest of the time I was sell that was due to covid. So I basically I was gonna end my Ninety my hundred day was gonna be like the beginning of March like I was like about to get back in the game covid hit and then so I had to wait another few months to get back in. But um, yeah, during that time lot of reflection. |
| 48:41.90 | Max Shank | And. |
| 48:49.40 | Max Shank | Avenue. Ah. |
| 48:59.36 | mikebledsoe | And so when I did meet the person I'm with now she really does check all the boxes and I I think it is part of it is I did the work of finding Out. What is it that I really want somebody and things that I thought were valuable like. Aren't as bad but like I I value emotional development over money for sure. |
| 49:26.64 | Max Shank | It's really valuable to write those things down and what's interesting is I've done the same thing. The list of things that you want is also the best way you can show up in a relationship. |
| 49:39.25 | mikebledsoe | Show like. |
| 49:42.90 | Max Shank | Like it just turns right back on you, you're like dammit This is like how I can best be in a relationship too. You know it's not just like ah okay, ah, pretty lady here's a list of things I want from you and she's like great. She hands you the list back and's like yeah I want that too and you're like fuck. |
| 49:46.47 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 49:59.41 | mikebledsoe | I Well I think there's I think there's some I think that's partly true. Ah, you know, kind of like the treat ah treat others the way you want to be treated. Um, but really the. |
| 50:02.41 | Max Shank | Ah, yeah. |
| 50:13.33 | Max Shank | Oh I don't think that's true. Yeah. |
| 50:16.51 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, you want to treat people the way they want to be treated so like in a relationship that probably is the ways in which you could show up better but also be on the lookout for what is it they want and how they like for me I I could I could do with less touch and my relationship like. |
| 50:33.54 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 50:36.37 | mikebledsoe | Um I I love touch I'm a high touch person but my girlfriend's even more so so like she has to remind me like are you gonna touch me I'm like oh okay, yeah, and I appreciate the reminder. But if I touched her as much as I wanted to be touched. She would not be satisfied. |
| 50:41.16 | Max Shank | Um. Right. |
| 50:52.68 | Max Shank | As long as you're both willing to communicate that then it can work out. Okay, and as long as you understand what's going on there then it's okay, but like I think shying away from direct Crystal clear communication. |
| 50:57.13 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 51:11.60 | Max Shank | Is maybe perceived as not very sexy sometimes but also it's the main reason that people quietly suffer in a relationship they're like in their head I'm not getting what I want but I'm just gonna I'm just gonna keep things really smooth and it's like no, that's not. |
| 51:15.48 | mikebledsoe | It. |
| 51:30.66 | Max Shank | That's not going to work Meanwhile if you have like 2 gay guys and they're both tops. There's no confusion there because no 1 is going to be happy in that situation. You need a top and you need a bottom and you know you understand what I'm saying like they're they're not going to. Well. |
| 51:45.83 | mikebledsoe | I get it I do it I know how I know how gay people do it? yeah. |
| 51:50.23 | Max Shank | I've met a lot. Ah I've met a lot of gay guys. Um, yeah, what? Ah what a fun bunch of fellows. Um, but yeah, there's no, there's no mincing words there is what I've noticed. It's like I am ah I am a top I am a bottom. Ah great. |
| 52:01.62 | mikebledsoe | Is what it's what. |
| 52:09.87 | Max Shank | Um, a bottom. It's not going to work. There's no,, There's no compatibility there and the same thing is true with asking for what you want out of a relationship and being clear on what the expectations are and I think of a relationship. Ah, like a romantic 1 is really a lot more like ah, a business partnership than anything Else. You are building a life together and you need to have more or less an operating agreement just as just like you would need in any other business like. You know I'll get the food and you cook the food and you do this and I'll do this and this and you know we have our responsibilities So There's no confusion about who's responsible for what and there's none of that um lack of clarity that can make people start to. Quietly Harbor resentment which is a huge problem. So if you don't ask for what you want and you get resentful. That's on you. |
| 53:13.35 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah I think for a lot of people. They don't even know what they want so they I I yeah. |
| 53:20.32 | Max Shank | Yeah, we'll shoot. Don't most people choose partners just based on how pretty they look by the way I think that if you prioritize that above everything else, You're probably going to have. Ah, relationship that is really challenging at some point. |
| 53:41.43 | mikebledsoe | I've never seen anyone who valued that over everything else have a ah long happy relationship. |
| 53:46.59 | Max Shank | Well because a relationship you know, even if you're doing a lot of sex. It's still like four percent of your day. It's an ah, an hour is four percent. The rest of the the rest of the time there's got to be other things that keep you interested. |
| 54:02.63 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, I'm not remembering who who told me this but ah, probably some relationship guru. Ah and which is sex is there to bridge the gap so that you have time to build the. |
| 54:05.28 | Max Shank | You know what. |
| 54:09.27 | Max Shank | Um, and. |
| 54:21.29 | mikebledsoe | Foundation of the relationship and if you make sex the foundation of the relationship. It's not going to last because like I said the beginning of the show. The first six months of relationship you're on drugs you're high. You're not, you're not thinking straight your hormones and. |
| 54:22.23 | Max Shank | Are. |
| 54:29.10 | Max Shank | Yeah, right? no. |
| 54:40.77 | mikebledsoe | Neurotransmitters are firing very differently than they will be in a year from now. Ah when you're relating to the same person so sex is a you know great sex I think for me isn't I need great sex I I will if I if I'm not getting that i. Begin to wander pretty easily. Um I mean I got high sex drive or something. |
| 55:02.50 | Max Shank | I Don't think there's anything I don't think there's anything wrong with that I think recognizing that things are changing in a way that you don't like is extremely valuable and it kind of correlates back to another important point which is if you're not. Comfortable by yourself. You probably won't be able to make the right choice for a relationship. |
| 55:29.60 | mikebledsoe | That's true. Yeah I the relationship I'm in I was I actually went this whole process where I was because I didn't know what was going to happen with a pandemic I'm like oh maybe I'm single for the rest of my life. Maybe there was a moment where that was like in the first the first month of it. |
| 55:43.40 | Max Shank | Oh yeah, what. |
| 55:47.10 | mikebledsoe | Was going world seems pretty chaotic I don't know if I'm gonna find a mate anytime soon. It might be a while I might as well enjoy me and without a partner. Um, yeah, what was I saying before that feel like we jumped tracks I was on to go back. |
| 55:51.70 | Max Shank | Um, ah. |
| 56:05.70 | mikebledsoe | Um, and my memory is not go ahead. |
| 56:07.47 | Max Shank | What you're the you you were talking about that. Um, you have a certain level of touch desire. Your lady has a slightly higher 1 Great sex is important to you but it's not the only thing you said sex is the bridge to build the foundation of other stuff. |
| 56:21.71 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah, yeah, the. But yeah, the set sex will hold 2 people together long enough to build that foundation. But if you don't spend time building the other aspects of your relationship aligning your boundaries aligning your values your vision of the future together. If. You don't take care of that in the first six months you probably won't it probably won't last and if you do make the choice to stay in a relationship and you don't have those things I would I would challenge you to look at whether you're with that person out of insecurity versus. |
| 56:56.80 | Max Shank | Um, it's really more like codependence and you're not willing to cut your losses even though it's the right choice I mean that is 1 of the most common fallacies in relationships is the sunk cost fallacies. Well I've been with this person it. So I'll stay with this person and it's like. |
| 56:58.77 | mikebledsoe | Out of true desire. |
| 57:04.43 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 57:13.18 | mikebledsoe | In here. |
| 57:16.80 | Max Shank | No, it's the same as ah, owning stock or owning possessions. It's not what I keep this. It's would I buy this today brand new again and if the answer is no then like what are you doing like yeah. |
| 57:32.20 | mikebledsoe | That's. |
| 57:36.79 | Max Shank | Oh man, it really is That's why I was so interested to talk about this and it's funny how you and I were just both thinking about the same thing because the whole concept of I know we both just were like how about relationships because it is I think the. |
| 57:44.37 | mikebledsoe | If we didn't know what we were gonna talk about 2 hours ago. You know. |
| 57:56.24 | Max Shank | The number 1 greatest thing ever is having ah like a loving romantic relationship or even just loving relationships in general and the worst thing is to have a relationship that is ah the source of Resentment. You know the source of settling for for less and it it can be really really good or really, really Awful. So It's probably the most important choice to make. |
| 58:18.67 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think. |
| 58:27.21 | mikebledsoe | I would say there was a there was a ah early my relate. You know my previous relationship there was I would work to get away I would I was always wanting to travel you know business conference signed me up. You know, just a little bit of relief here and there. |
| 58:39.61 | Max Shank | The. |
| 58:45.81 | mikebledsoe | And but now I find myself now wanting to like I want to work to provide for the the family like I want to set things up so that we can spend more time together and when we travel apart. |
| 59:01.59 | Max Shank | Yeah, perfect. |
| 59:03.60 | mikebledsoe | Um, like I miss her and like it's it's it's oh I wish she could be with me instead of you know, whatever so and she actually has been traveling more than me which is ah that's a first as well is well that's not the first time I've been in relationship where they they were traveling more but it's ah. |
| 59:12.68 | Max Shank | And. |
| 59:21.36 | mikebledsoe | In a relationship that's lasted this long being with somebody who travels as much as she does is like okay. |
| 59:25.45 | Max Shank | So when you were a little younger you were traveling a lot and not ah not getting too attached kind of so it's really funny like because you know I traveled a ton for work and I think I also. |
| 59:32.23 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, okay. |
| 59:44.60 | Max Shank | Had this idea that if I was desirable to women then that was the best thing so I wouldn't want to be in a relationship I would just want to be like coveted which sounds pretty like twisted I guess but that's just the way I was so I wouldn't even I wouldn't even date people who lived close to me they had to. Live like really far away so it was like totally clear like hey we're just we're just having fun. There's like nothing to because I don't want to hurt anybody's feelings. But I also thought that my worth as a person was directly correlated. Whether. As to whether as to how I was judged by women if I was desirable isn't that funny. |
| 01:00:24.38 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, have a similar experience which is ah I was married and then like I just I wanted to be seen as desirable. So I had to walk I know a party with 2 women on my arms like instead of just 1 ne's not enough. |
| 01:00:37.90 | Max Shank | Yeah, right. |
| 01:00:41.63 | mikebledsoe | Have 2 I got to show that I got to show everybody that I'm desirable I'm good enough. |
| 01:00:44.70 | Max Shank | And that's what I would come in with 3 and that's when I would come in with 3 because that meant I was 1 lady better than you. |
| 01:00:54.89 | mikebledsoe | I wish that scene actually did go down like I walk in with 2 I'm like you walk in with 3 like fuck man. He beat me again. |
| 01:00:56.94 | Max Shank | It's like that would have been. Then Jay-z walks in with 21 of them is beyonce and we're just like I guess he wins it's It's funny. Ah, how direct that message is. Like popular culture and especially music like it's all about like cars and planes and hoes and that's like the value of a man is like how many hose he has poolside and his mansion and what kind of plane. |
| 01:01:26.72 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:01:35.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, is a thing 1 thing occurred to me in this conversation which I'm I'm having a lot of appreciation for myself and that I never thought I'd be as good with women as I am today? Um, um, ah I did become quite the ladies man I can I can work a room. I can pick up women I can ask them out on dates fairly easy. And yeah, when I was younger I was terrified that I would never be attractive or be able to talk to women with confidence. So just conversations allowed me reflect on that. So it's. |
| 01:02:11.79 | Max Shank | I think I I did the same thing I put them up on a pedestal like they were some sort of otherworldly creature and they are in a certain sense. It's interesting because what we like about women is that they're different than men. But also what we hate about them. |
| 01:02:12.24 | mikebledsoe | Pretty cool. |
| 01:02:31.78 | Max Shank | Is the way that they're different from men most of the time. So So it's ah it's interesting. That's what makes relationships. Um fun I think is the differences but it's also what makes them challenging because you can't know what another person's. Life experience is like and you know I think maybe 1 other thought that is important is it's never personal like no 1 Ne's ever personally rejecting you? No 1 Ne's ever personally attacking you no 1 Ne's ever. |
| 01:02:52.23 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 01:03:09.75 | Max Shank | Like lashing out at you. They're just in a state where their lizard brain has taken over because they feel afraid or they just want something different, but it's never personal to you as an individual what someone else does and I think that's that's probably pretty hard for. |
| 01:03:23.34 | mikebledsoe | So. |
| 01:03:29.74 | Max Shank | Most people too believe but it's true. |
| 01:03:31.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, not taking things personally is huge I think in general but in relationships yeah, that's in romantic relationships if you can master that 1 then that'll that'll help you out I mean my my girlfriend I have gotten into we've had 1 fight. |
| 01:03:49.50 | Max Shank | Or. |
| 01:03:50.91 | mikebledsoe | Many disagreements but were able to work it out 1 fight where I raised my voice and regretted it but um and quickly mended that is 1 of those where like the the switch got flipped. There's 3 o'clock in the morning you know I'll make up all sorts of excuses why it happened but ah. |
| 01:04:05.98 | Max Shank | Here Come the excuses. |
| 01:04:10.57 | mikebledsoe | Ah, ah, but now I forgot what I was talking about all the shame came rolling in. Um, yeah, so what was I talking about. |
| 01:04:16.73 | Max Shank | Yeah, you should be ashamed of yourself for losing control for 1 minute. |
| 01:04:30.30 | mikebledsoe | I took nootropics this morning and I think they backfired my memory has been terrible on this show. |
| 01:04:32.87 | Max Shank | Oh gosh I am also cutting you off more than usual because I wanted to say a few things today. |
| 01:04:38.86 | mikebledsoe | Ah I think it's good I think I think it worked out my lack of memory here. It's perfect. Perfect I hope you got a lot of words in today. |
| 01:04:47.10 | Max Shank | yeah yeah I did I got in more than usual, um because that's you know how we assert our dominance in this conversation. Maybe maybe the folks at home can vote on which 1 of us is the dominant 1 in this podcast. |
| 01:04:57.30 | mikebledsoe | It's not. It's right? it. |
| 01:05:05.77 | mikebledsoe | Ah, we should just be a vote for every show you know who won who won this who won the match. It's like it's ah it's a podcast fight you know, um. |
| 01:05:08.73 | Max Shank | Yeah, yeah, who. |
| 01:05:20.70 | Max Shank | That's actually 1 of the things I like about our conversations and usually I find this is more true with talking to women as they don't interrupt and steamroll as much and they're better at listening. |
| 01:05:31.84 | mikebledsoe | And. |
| 01:05:34.14 | Max Shank | And I'm not trying to compare you to women at all I think I also have a more feminine conversational style where I feel comfortable just letting someone talk for a long time but it's very difficult to make any headway in a conversation if you are only talking with people who want to win the conversation. |
| 01:05:51.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:05:53.91 | Max Shank | Right? That's ah, that's a huge um handicap to your development if you don't have conversations with people who are good at listening and also thoughtful in the way that they respond. |
| 01:06:08.15 | mikebledsoe | Well the um I did a thousand I've done over 1000 podcast interviews where I've interviewed other people. Yeah, so in a lot of those podcasts for 2 to 3 hours I'd say they're between they range between ninety minutes and and 3 hours. |
| 01:06:13.70 | Max Shank | What. |
| 01:06:27.69 | mikebledsoe | So 1 of the things I note as 1 of the as something that was huge in my personal development was just doing the interviews just being interested in somebody else in a way that I know the audience would like so. |
| 01:06:37.50 | Max Shank | Okay. |
| 01:06:46.53 | mikebledsoe | Satisfying some of my own curiosity imagining the curiosity of my audience and making sure that those questions were asked. Um, you know there's a few times I talked over people I was interviewing and I got feedback that was being a dick um, and. |
| 01:07:01.11 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 01:07:05.17 | mikebledsoe | I was called names a couple times and they were right? Ah so it's I think it's a matter of reps because I grew up in a home where it was about winning the conversation. There's a lot of yelling over each other and all that. |
| 01:07:20.80 | Max Shank | It takes a special kind of confidence though to be silent for a little bit longer I would say it's more valuable in conversations that are off the air like person to person conversations where you're not recording it for some interview. But. |
| 01:07:35.47 | mikebledsoe | But in. |
| 01:07:40.28 | Max Shank | Taking a pause to really consider what you want to say to that person is crazy valuable and ironically or surprisingly people will listen to you more attentively if you do that rather than just. |
| 01:07:54.88 | mikebledsoe | Or yeah. |
| 01:07:59.24 | Max Shank | But but but but but but words words, words are so when you're on a podcast. It's tough because part of what you're doing is you're like showcasing what you know right? So you want to be talk talk Talk Talk talk hey like I know about this hey I know about this hey look how smart I am look at all these things I remember like I can say these big fancy words. |
| 01:08:05.11 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:08:15.96 | mikebledsoe | Well that that also reminds me of um how I approach new relationships just not romanticic. But when I meet new people I've noticed this a couple times in the last month where I was in a car with somebody knew somebody I hadn't. |
| 01:08:18.75 | Max Shank | Ah, what. |
| 01:08:25.21 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 01:08:36.20 | mikebledsoe | Spent much time with I'm in a car with them 1 on 1 and I just don't say anything who sit there in silence and see what they do and then it's it. Most people will start small talk like ah so you know the weather. |
| 01:08:41.35 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 01:08:55.14 | Max Shank | Because silence is uncomfortable. |
| 01:08:55.27 | mikebledsoe | Or my dog or super uncomfortable. So there have been a number of times where I'm with somebody and I'm being silent and then five minutes goes buying the go. Wow! This is really nice like yeah it is and it's like okay we can be friends like it's going to be a lot easier to be friends and. You're just trying to ah if you're feeling so uncomfortable that you have to just say shit. So. |
| 01:09:20.12 | Max Shank | You can enjoy a person's presence without words and without a touch either. You can just enjoy that a person is there with you and I think that's a great indicator that that person is comfortable in their own skin. |
| 01:09:36.47 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:09:38.59 | Max Shank | That they're comfortable around you I think that's a very good point is very telling babbling My ah my girlfriend was hanging out with somebody and she was. |
| 01:09:42.38 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 01:09:56.97 | Max Shank | She she calls me up afterward and she was like she just wouldn't be quiet. She it was just constant constant just spewage of words like any silence would be just crazy uncomfortable and sometimes you don't notice it. |
| 01:10:04.71 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, for. |
| 01:10:10.83 | mikebledsoe | My ah the. |
| 01:10:16.18 | Max Shank | Until you're ah you have the juxtaposition of someone who's very comfortable saying nothing and someone who would be like in physical pain if 5 seconds go by without words being said. |
| 01:10:25.52 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, the damn. My memory really is fucked today. |
| 01:10:35.34 | Max Shank | Yeah, you're off today. It's it's all the it's all the shame associated from your checkered past. |
| 01:10:42.97 | mikebledsoe | I did just I did bring up about fifty percent of my pain on the in the last hour so |
| 01:10:48.99 | Max Shank | You laid it you laid it all out I I was like ah leaning back feeling very freudian I was like oh yes, now Michael telling me about your muzza. I feel like another half hour. We'll dig up every little bit of archeological pain. |
| 01:11:07.47 | mikebledsoe | Mark yeah well ah, what you were saying reminded me of ah something mark england from Vocabulary he has this he has this term he calls transcribing and it's when somebody starts telling you about something that happened. And they're just walking you through what happened with no there's no story. It's like and then you know I woke up this morning and they did it and they just like tell you about their day. You're like okay like and there's nothing to talk about. |
| 01:11:28.66 | Max Shank | And. |
| 01:11:41.65 | Max Shank | Isn't it merk with no purpose though I mean maybe a purpose of just getting attention because it depends how the story is framed right? I mean. |
| 01:11:49.58 | mikebledsoe | Well yeah, but it's not a story. It's just ah, it's a listing of things that happened and in chronological order which technically is a story. |
| 01:11:56.67 | Max Shank | Well it it. Yeah, it is a story because they're retelling it so that makes it a story. What I find is when people do that. It's usually because they're trying to paint themselves as a hero or a victim right. |
| 01:12:10.89 | mikebledsoe | A a. |
| 01:12:14.45 | Max Shank | Like oh I did this and then oh my god you won't believe what happened to me I was waiting in line and then they closed the line and I was like what you got to be kidding me so then I had to go to a different line and it took me ten minutes and that was late to pick up my kid. Oh I got I just can't handle this shit anymore and you're like oh gay all right like I get it. Oh. |
| 01:12:24.21 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 01:12:30.52 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the the things that some people tell stories about like oh if that that happened to you or me we wouldn't think anything of it like oh the line closed and there was no emotional upset so we wouldn't even remember to tell that story later. |
| 01:12:46.66 | Max Shank | Yeah, because it's not. It's not really valid and your life is your collection of stories that you bring with you and the stimuli that you experience and the more you retell a story the more gravity it has in your. |
| 01:13:01.89 | mikebledsoe | Like. |
| 01:13:04.90 | Max Shank | Life and in yourself. So I'm I'm really I would say careful to elect which stories that I perpetuate is so it's so important. |
| 01:13:14.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, agree and be considerate people. Don't want to hear that shit people don't want to hear like like tell me good stories tell me something with a point you know I. |
| 01:13:20.80 | Max Shank | I Hate it. |
| 01:13:28.97 | Max Shank | Well, it doesn't it doesn't need to it doesn't need to have a point but it should maybe be funny at least? yeah so I think of it like I think of it like this I think of it I've told you about an energy vampires. |
| 01:13:30.54 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, just be considerate. That's how I got said well that would be a good point is the humor humor. |
| 01:13:45.29 | mikebledsoe | I'm gonna have I'm gonna have friends listening to this me like oh my God have I been inconsiderate This might think I'm a dick for like no everyone everyone everyone stops talking to me like I'm afraid to talk to him. He's judging me. |
| 01:13:49.81 | Max Shank | Yeah, no wonder he never calls me anymore. He must hate me. Yeah, the leper now. Um, it's like an energy vampireism right? People are trying to get. |
| 01:14:04.65 | mikebledsoe | Is. |
| 01:14:08.71 | Max Shank | Some energy from you for for just a story about how they are sad. Let's say in some way for simplicity's sake but it's just like with regular vampires if you don't invite that in they can't come in. No 1 if you draw a good boundary. |
| 01:14:12.89 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:14:26.48 | Max Shank | No 1 can do that to you and I think right now. Um, maybe it's just more front and center. But I've never seen more like victim stories told and retold I even felt myself doing it ah last year and I ah put the kaibosh on that because. It was easy for me to go like oh you know like f this is not fair. They can't like close my gym blah blah blah blah blah and you know all this all this stuff and I was like man max you gotta stop being such a bitch. Why don't you just focus on what you can do and stop telling that story and sure enough it did make things. |
| 01:15:03.54 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:15:04.55 | Max Shank | A ton better. So don't don't don't don't retell stories where you're the victim because you may get you probably will get um some psychic energy boost. You'll get some likes you might even get a hug or something like that. But the the cost is not worth. |
| 01:15:23.51 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well I think we'll close it up there I think we we did a good job talking about relationships. So I say that like it was a question I think there's a lot of nuggets in there. There's a lot of things that I can think. |
| 01:15:24.34 | Max Shank | That benefit. |
| 01:15:32.16 | Max Shank | Yeah, we were all over the place I liked it? yeah. |
| 01:15:42.11 | mikebledsoe | I'm sure tomorrow I'd go oh there's 20 other things I could talk about so maybe there'll be a part 2 to relationships. |
| 01:15:47.24 | Max Shank | Yeah, we could get some feedback from the from the folks at home I mean hopefully by now they understand that the most important thing is just to marry a beautiful idiot. |
| 01:16:02.23 | mikebledsoe | Ah, oh and if you didn't get that joke man you were doomed max where can people find you. |
| 01:16:03.17 | Max Shank | Ah, yeah, do the yeah, do the opposite of that do the exact opposite of that um maxsank dot com I'm also at Maank although I'm not really using. Social media. |
| 01:16:22.37 | mikebledsoe | But he may in the future who knows ah you can find me on Instagram at mike underscore bloodso and if you're a coach and doing the coach thing. The strongcoach dot com that's all I got see you next week levy max |
| 01:16:25.39 | Max Shank | I might. |
| 01:16:34.58 | Max Shank | Thank you folks! Love you buddy. |
| 00:00.56 | mikebledsoe | That's how you already canceled you're bulletproof. |
| 00:01.76 | Max Shank | It's okay I already canceled myself so well, it's like I found I was putting so much of my identity into this illusion that I had masterfully crafted. On the internet I was like the dark night of fitness I was professional I was like once in a while a little bit funny I used all the big fancy words and I only showed people the exact slice of my life I wanted them to see and I was really good at it too and then I was like man this is a. Probably probably not good long term like this whole this whole reality that we've created where people think oh, that's just that's just max all the time I'm just out there. You know going on vacations and lifting huge things all the time and it's not really.. It's not really very honest. So of course I think we all do to fit in I think that's kind of normal and the best friends you have are the ones you don't have to fake around and truthfully. |
| 00:57.30 | mikebledsoe | Or you are censoring yourself. It sounds like. |
| 01:15.83 | Max Shank | I don't really hang out with too many people that I have to um, fake it around which is why I say some horrible things that are also really funny like if you've ever played the game would you rather? that's a really, that's a really good 1 Are you played would you rather. |
| 01:20.66 | mikebledsoe | Four. |
| 01:30.62 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 01:34.00 | Max Shank | So here's it's a hypothetical game. So for example, would you rather have sex with a goat and have no 1 know about it or have a video of you having sex with a goat that's totally fake, but everyone thinks you did. |
| 01:47.44 | mikebledsoe | Oh that's a good 1 Yeah ah I'm gonna censor myself on that 1 actually I'm I'm having a hard time because yeah I think I might be on the same page as you on that 1 Ah. |
| 01:56.14 | Max Shank | I would have sex with the goat. |
| 02:04.99 | Max Shank | Is because there's still such a social stigma against bestiality right now we're not really enlightened about that. |
| 02:07.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's and. |
| 02:13.34 | mikebledsoe | Ah, well, it's interesting. What you're discussing is self-censorship is ah I hear people say they want to be more Authentic. You know I talk to a lot of people who want to express themselves on the internet and because I think people witnessed me do it and then they're like how do you do it I Want to do it too. And and and I'm definitely somebody Who's who's got a history of censoring myself less So these days than and earlier. But I think people deep down they desire not needing a sensor sensor themselves. They they want to. They want to be widely accepted by everybody but they think that the only way that can happen and it's probably true. The only way you can be popular with everybody is to censor yourself depending on the audience you're talking to and the person you're talking to. |
| 03:03.58 | Max Shank | It is the most important thing to fit in with the group that you're a part of to fit in with the tribe I mean little kids go Rob seven eleven s and murder people so they can be part of a gang people say things that they don't mean people lie I mean I was a kid once I used to lie. |
| 03:16.69 | mikebledsoe | Yep. |
| 03:22.26 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah. |
| 03:22.93 | Max Shank | Did you ever lie I was great at it I had like think I had like 50 grandparents die as far as teachers knew growing up. Oh I decided I didn't do my homework a grandparents diet or something like that you know like when your're kid and you find out that lying is a. |
| 03:29.54 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 03:42.50 | Max Shank | Like a ten second uncomfortable experience that can save you like weeks of trouble. Potentially it's it's natural that you would do it and if you're talking about how to like fit in better. Oh my god of course we all do that. |
| 03:49.94 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 03:57.67 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, but would you say that everyone on of about everyone. But I think that everyone gets to a point at some point in their life where they don't want to have to censor themselves anymore and I think that they. When they are at that point the language they use to describe what they desire is they want to be free I Want to be free to express myself and ah and what ends up happening is when someone starts exploring how much they want to express themselves. Find out that they're the only ones that are censoring themselves based on wanting to be accepted by the tribe and the likeability and so I've witnessed a lot of people including myself go through this process where a slowly saying fuck it I don't give a fuck What people think. I'm going to be more honest and then watching watching the polarization happen where some people get become more distant from me the more honest I am and other people getting a lot closer because of how honest I am and it's a it's a filter and it's and it's. |
| 04:57.20 | Max Shank | And. |
| 05:02.56 | Max Shank | Well, it's just filter. It's a good thing. It's like panning for gold. |
| 05:09.20 | mikebledsoe | And it's really served me in a way where I experience my experience of my life is ah very enhanced. It's it's unreal at times. Um, and my sister she came to my birthday party a few weeks ago. And she got to witness my community and she was blown away. She didn't realize that people could be like that. But it really is a result of censoring myself less and attracting those people who and then giving permission to other people. Censor themselves less because I think you and I both say things that in. Probably me more publicly but say things that people turn their heads at and go well that's a crazy thing to say I've never heard anyone say that before or put it that way. Um, and I think I think it gives people permission to go oh if he can do it I can do it too. |
| 05:58.42 | Max Shank | Totally and. Well and there's something to be said about a frictionless experience like if you're in a situation where I guess what I'm saying is it's easy to put other people at ease with the way that you communicate. Like you don't have to draw attention to things that are like if you see someone who's really overweight. You don't have to draw attention to their fatness. You don't have to just speak whatever you instinctually think so we're always choosing what to say as if. |
| 06:32.71 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, it doesn't mean doesn't mean that. |
| 06:40.10 | Max Shank | It's important or not important. |
| 06:40.61 | mikebledsoe | Well I would say it's um, yeah, censorship is a form of filter but it's not the only version of Filter. There's There's the the filter of of ah of response you're being responsible with your words and how people receive them. And so it wouldn't behoove me to go out there and tell everybody exactly what I think and the way that I want to say it now. What I do is I say things say what I believe and what I think in a way in which I know it can be received because there's no point and if I'm just saying. You know if I'm just dropping the truth. Ah the way that I want to be heard and understood I'm just going to sound like a crazy person. |
| 07:27.50 | Max Shank | Well, you just touched on something that I was thinking which is a good communicator doesn't just communicate the information as simply as possible. He considers who the audience is so it will resonate with them the best. So. |
| 07:40.68 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 07:46.26 | Max Shank | The examples that you use or the language you use I mean you and I both understand the the power of communication and getting a resonant message if you and I were writing an exercise program. For 20 year old men or 50 year old women. The program itself might actually look the same but the way that we present that offer would be monumentally different or at least it should be monumentally different. So it's not just about. |
| 08:18.78 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 08:23.98 | Max Shank | Oh I'm like speaking my truth. It's like well why are you talking at all unless you care about the message being received. |
| 08:30.28 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well that but that makes me think of like like ah it it it requiring you to have good communication to get your point across in a way that they can receive it is that is ah a good sense. That's good. Ah. Leadership. That's good communication to have good leadership. You have to have good communication and what I think we're witnessing in our society right now is um, it's laziness I see that that censorship when when censorship is being heavily used. It's ah it's a form of laziness. And it's also um, on that note, what we were just saying too is you have to fit it to your audience. So what ends up happening is the larger the audience the harder it is to be good at communicating with that audience. So we we take the United states of America and there's 3 hundred and fifty million people. You now have to create ah get to communicate the narrative in a way that that impacts all 3 hundred million people is that even lowest common and nomin and is that possible and so. |
| 09:35.80 | Max Shank | Lowest common denominator. |
| 09:42.63 | mikebledsoe | And then that's why I mean lowest common denominator is the exact reason why any time the average per we look at what's happening with Mainstream I go they're going right? What's left. They're going left. What's right? Okay, what's going on here because when there's being to the low and lower. Low is coming denominator if you want to be average. That's the that's the perfect advice to take that's the perfect information to consume and to believe if you want to be above average. You have to go the other way and that that can be very uncomfortable but to me I look at the difference between good leadership and and. And poor leadership is that ability to communicate effectively and I just see a lot of laziness and when people say do this because I said so is like okay, you just lost it. |
| 10:29.41 | Max Shank | Well and the other side of that is that you could say it's not laziness. It's just efficiency because you have to trust like. For example, if I get a plumber over at my house. And I don't know anything about plumbing I have to trust that he's going to do a good job and there is an incentive for him to do good job and maybe there's a contract that says if the pipe explodes he's on the hook for it. So I don't blame people for seeking answers outside themselves because it is way more efficient. However, while it is more efficient. It is also so I think about it in terms of concentration of Power. So if you concentrate power into a single point you can get more penetration which means you can do things much faster like a dictatorship but the trick with concentration. Is. You also give leave yourself open to the fast track for concentration Camps. So it's It's ah it's just exactly so. |
| 11:29.88 | mikebledsoe | Yeah,, but there's also single single points of Failure. So if you if you concentrate your supply chain and everything's going through 1 2 3 ports or something like that. It only takes 1 person to do something Dumb. And the entire population suffers. |
| 11:51.40 | Max Shank | Investing is a good example too. You know you have your investment portfolio say you have a million dollars or something like that. Do you put equal amounts into 10 companies equal amounts into 1 hundred companies or do you put it all into 1 company and. If you put it all into 1 company and that 1 just happens to do the best you have made the most that you can possibly make. But if it goes to zero. You've also lost everything so it's a real. It's it's tricky with with concentration of power and I think that's really what this all comes back to. Thomas soul I always go back to because he said what we do is not important. It's who decides what we do who decides? what information should be censored and what information should not be censored and that's that's a worthwhile conversation to have um. I think when it comes to the overarching idea of what is the role of government I like the phrase. The role is not to protect people. It is to protect freedom from coercion. Essentially so we're trying to keep people free. To pursue happiness right? Life liberty and pursuit of happiness that doesn't mean you buy food for everybody. It means that you prevent stealing and coercion and fraud and things like that. |
| 13:18.38 | mikebledsoe | I think I think it's referred to as negative rights is that the the government and ah you know most people in the world and and Americans are included in this unfortunately the assumption is that they have no rights and all rights are granted by the government and. |
| 13:23.60 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 13:36.86 | Max Shank | It's just the opposite. |
| 13:38.60 | mikebledsoe | And a place if you're looking at from perspective. What's called well I didn't even hear this term until recently and they go oh yeah, negative rights I go okay that actually makes sense and that is you have the right? you have the right to do anything you want as long as you don't impede on someone else's rights and. Ah, the government's there just to ensure that we don't trample over each other's shit and that means not inhibiting. Someone's pursuit of life liberty happiness upholding um ah property rights essentially so the government is it. It was it was there to protect you know in the very beginning. |
| 14:11.97 | Max Shank | It's really all it's for. |
| 14:16.80 | mikebledsoe | Started off with people that knew how to fight and had weapons would protect farmers and they made deals with the farmers so they wouldn't get robbed by these thieves and then they demanded you know a five percent of their rations and then of course that's now if you're an american that's up to 30 something percent. Um, are your rations for to pay for your protection. Um, so it's ah that the benefit that the government gets from from censorship but I see is it's ah just a maintenance of power. So if you're if your job. If you're that person that comes in and says I'm going to protect you and ah and then there becomes there's potential competition for protection then ah you know they've got to do whatever they can do to squash that because they don't they don't want competition for being able to. Ah, protect your property and your life. |
| 15:11.39 | Max Shank | Right? So kind of tying it back into censorship which is the core discussion today. What are the advantages ofor censorship. How is it good for everybody. |
| 15:23.52 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, so I went online and I did a search and so I found I found 8 that's right fucking? Well you know that's why I use. Ah, that's why I use a duck duck go. |
| 15:30.23 | Max Shank | And and somebody chose what results that you were able to see from that search. |
| 15:42.12 | mikebledsoe | With a vpn so I actually so I take steps personally to reduce how much censorship I'm experiencing from Google That's true. That's true. Yeah. |
| 15:49.21 | Max Shank | Sometimes the results aren't as good though. That's the problem right now. Sometimes they aren't as good and I I try it with both because I do the same thing. |
| 16:00.83 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I agree. Ah yeah, so these these are I'll go through the list. Ah 1 is hate speech censorship allows us to reduce hate speech number 2 is protect children which is the ah to me is the number 1 excuse for censorship that. Anytime censorships gets questioned. It's like the last stand you know when you used to? yeah we mean privacy. Oh yeah, yeah, but I think that people want privacy from the government. So. It's kind of like if they're the ones censoring that's people are more likely to. |
| 16:21.90 | Max Shank | Or privacy. Yeah. |
| 16:35.20 | mikebledsoe | Give their information to Facebook and they are to government. |
| 16:35.28 | Max Shank | Oh but what I'm saying is if you convince everybody that it's for the sake of protecting kids from getting raped that they have to look through your phone every day then some people will be okay with that is pretty high level persuasion. It's always kids. |
| 16:45.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, so yeah. |
| 16:53.69 | Max Shank | Always you know, take away the guns cause of the children take away your privacy because of the children take away free speech because of the children won't somebody think of the children. There's a there's a sign in my neighborhood quick tangent that says drive like your kids live here. |
| 17:01.42 | mikebledsoe | Right? I Wonder how the kids. |
| 17:12.51 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 17:12.68 | Max Shank | You know there is There's a road to speed limit sign. But there's this extra sign that someone has put out that says drive like your kids here and what I want to do is put up my own sign that says teach your kids. What a road is oh. |
| 17:30.14 | mikebledsoe | Ah I. |
| 17:30.83 | Max Shank | Like what like oh my god that's just ridiculous I understand the concept some helicopter Mom is like worry that their kid will run out in the street. But really if her little kid runs out in the street and it's it's too young to know the difference then she's a bad mom. And if it's old enough to know the difference but she doesn't communicate that then she's also a bad mom. So. Either way, it's that parent's fault just like if you see a fat kid. That's not the kid's faultest. Parent's fault |
| 17:53.83 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well. Yeah I want to get in I want to get in the who's who's responsible because I think responsibility is is a good way to ah segue this and into some some actionables by end of this show but I want to hit this the rest of this list so hate speech protect children. Reduce conflict in society which I'm not sure that's actually working ah security to a country's government. Actually what was what was on the internet was security. What was it. Ah. |
| 18:41.54 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah to a country's profile censorship can provide another level of security to a country's profile. Um, which to me again, it's they're not trying to censor and that's basically censoring sensitive. Government documents from being exposed like a wikileaks type of conversation. So Um I I like to point out that a lot of people confuse. Ah your country with your government and these 2 things are separate um and it's interesting to run into a blog where they. And make that collapse distinction ipe. Oh yeah, what was it. |
| 19:18.00 | Max Shank | Mark Twain had a quote about that a man should be loyal to his country all the time and loyal to his government when they deserve it. |
| 19:28.79 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, beautiful Mark twain 1 of my favorite authors. Um I p I p for artists and inventors so intellectual property copyright so you can't rip off someone else's work. Ah. |
| 19:32.53 | Max Shank | No, it's funny guy. |
| 19:40.96 | Max Shank | And then. |
| 19:45.53 | mikebledsoe | By the way I think I p the idea of I p is not that old I think it's about 1 hundred years old or something like that. Well at least the modern day I p um because we can copy shit now whereas before it wasn't an issue. Um. |
| 19:50.38 | Max Shank | Are. |
| 20:04.20 | mikebledsoe | Stop false content. That's 1 that's probably the most popular 1 that's out right now fake news ah improve quality of information. Basically they said improve ah their exact words for like. |
| 20:07.30 | Max Shank | Fake news. |
| 20:23.40 | mikebledsoe | Improve a person's knowledge that 1 kind of made me chuckle. Um and and reduce identity Theft. So All these things sound good at face value Hate speech. Protect children reduce conflict in society security to a country's government I P for artists inventors stop False Content. You want just break each 1 of these down. |
| 20:46.80 | Max Shank | Sure we could I mean Hate Speech is funny because who who decides where's the line. |
| 20:52.36 | mikebledsoe | Why I think when you jump right to the end max I think I think that um I mean all this all this comes down to who decides on all these topics is and just so you were saying about Thomas so so soul |
| 21:01.16 | Max Shank | That's what I do. Um, yeah. Soul Oh My God He's the man you should watch ah the out never mind I'll tell you later it's He's good though. |
| 21:11.96 | mikebledsoe | Haven't read a ship before I have to check it out. Ah so. |
| 21:20.27 | mikebledsoe | Cool. Ah yeah, it's like who who decides and I think that ah people tend to treat people who are in office as some type of superior being that knows better than them. And I get talking to people about this and the way they talk about it I'm going Wow You really believe that there are people who I I understand there are these people who are experts but ah the people that you've decided to trust are just people who happen to be in office or were appointed by people who were in office. And're not necessarily. They're the best policy makers. They're the best at creating policy which is making rules for other people to follow, but they're not the best that really anything else. They're really good at control. Oh yeah. |
| 22:06.66 | Max Shank | I Disagree I Disagree I think they I think you can either do good or you can do well and I think the people who can do well who can play the game who can be charismatic sociopaths who are hungry for more power and willing to distribute it. Are the ones who are in Charge. Definitely not the people who are best at making policies that are effective in improving. Oh well I mean yeah, that's. |
| 22:31.36 | mikebledsoe | Well I'm not saying good policies I'm just saying ah the creation of policies is about control. |
| 22:41.25 | Max Shank | True and what I'm saying is the people who hold those positions of power aren't even necessarily the ones who are writing those policies. It's just the ones who are the most power hungry who then hire like lawyers and there's lobbying and stuff like that. So when we ask. Who decides? That's 1 of the big problems mean lobbying is a crazy bad problem right? and we don't have time. We don't have time if I mean if you look at how that works you would. It's almost enough to blow your brains out and be like this is game over like how did this happen. |
| 23:06.95 | mikebledsoe | Insane. |
| 23:16.84 | mikebledsoe | Oh. |
| 23:19.32 | Max Shank | But ah now as far as who decides it's always the people who are the most power hungryngry because by definition they're going to have the biggest incentive to get that power because if you're in that situation. It's painful to not have. That level of power and everything comes back from pain being the primary motivator hunger desire pain all Synonyms. So. It's no surprise that the biggest incentive actually is to maintain that authority and the other. Authority is basically just you must trust me Blindly and it goes back to our 2 common rhetorical fallacies or logical fallacies which are appeal to authority and ad homism attack and they're the 2 arguments. Totally disregard the argument and instead focus on the arguer and this is this is where we get into why it's efficient to just trust somebody else like hey doctor science you you make my health decisions for me. |
| 24:19.55 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 24:33.62 | Max Shank | Is load off my mind so much easier I can understand the desire to do that and it's also so much faster to just write somebody off Oh that guy that guy max he's fucking Crazy. Don't listen to him don't even listen to anything he says he's just a. Crazy Conspiracy Theorist Nut Job Jerk I don't know you get it. |
| 24:57.35 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, amazing thing about ah I've also got a list of which I want to hit I started a list of basically overt and covert censorship and the the labeling of things is. |
| 25:07.40 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 25:15.47 | Max Shank | Um, how about essential how about essential. |
| 25:16.61 | mikebledsoe | Ah, very interesting right? Yeah yeah, it's yeah I'd say I'm putting down labeling as censorship I Hate speech. |
| 25:34.25 | Max Shank | What about it? Ah no, it's not nice, but I don't know people basically will dig their own grave by being hateful. |
| 25:35.72 | mikebledsoe | Is there anything wrong with it. |
| 25:50.63 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that's a very wise place to sit from what about for the fools out there. |
| 25:58.30 | Max Shank | But for well I don't hate the fools I like fools. Um, once again I don't think there's a problem with ignorance. Nothing wrong with that I'm ignorant about most things arrogance which is like I know what's best for you. |
| 26:00.49 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 26:17.34 | Max Shank | Instead of I know what's best for me. That's rather problematic and yeah I don't understand the the need or even the definition of hate Speech like could I could I call you a homo but not a fag Just for example. |
| 26:29.38 | mikebledsoe | Um, well, um, yeah. |
| 26:36.69 | Max Shank | I like homos frankly I think they're a really exuberant bunch. It seems like they almost ah get a. It seems like they crack the code. You know what? I mean like they get like the mail. |
| 26:50.90 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah. |
| 26:55.29 | Max Shank | Sexual energy. But they also get the feminine like exuberance and they seem a little bit more liberated like it seems like pretty fun Actually I'm not sexually attracted to dudes. But if I were I would have had it would be so easy. |
| 27:03.58 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 27:09.79 | mikebledsoe | You be so good at it. Yeah, so it's um, well I'm reading this book right now the cuddling of the american mind and 1 of the things they talk about is ah they talk about this view that that. |
| 27:13.70 | Max Shank | And be such a good homo. |
| 27:29.43 | mikebledsoe | Words are violence and that you know if you so yeah, yeah, well this is this is what's going on in up and they're looking specifically at colleges and academics in academic settings where people are being. |
| 27:32.11 | Max Shank | Sounds like a collapse distinction. |
| 27:46.61 | mikebledsoe | Are invited to come speak and then people basically come out and say that this person is causing violence because they're saying something that causes an emotional trigger inside of them so there is this. Ah, there's this thing where people believe that. Ah, how. |
| 27:55.47 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 28:06.15 | mikebledsoe | How they interpret your intention is your intention you're doing this to hurt me. It's like well I'm just speaking words and and so people have have confused ah emotional pain with physical injury. |
| 28:23.11 | Max Shank | I Think people should be forced to wrestle and do a little boxing growing up so they can understand the distinction between physical violence and I don't actually think that but there's definitely a common nominator in people I've met at least. |
| 28:23.12 | mikebledsoe | These these are 2 different things. |
| 28:42.00 | Max Shank | Those who have some experience with martial arts boxing Jujitsu Judo something like that seem to have a much more realistic perception of the world. They seem to have less of this. Fear based lashing out for things that other people just say there's a big difference. Well and don't didn't we like blame Grand Theft Auto for for violence or something like that. |
| 29:04.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, cause they're they're more in touch with cause and effect. |
| 29:18.68 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah. |
| 29:20.81 | Max Shank | Haven't heard about like the hooker murder epidemic that resulted from that probably still way more people die as a result of alcohol but we try to we try to Cherry pick these things and I don't know we're always like fighting each other for a new reason you know the whole. |
| 29:28.49 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 29:38.98 | Max Shank | Idea of hate speech is where do you draw the line like let people say what they want let people um self- select their friend group. You know if if you say ah you know anyone with red hair should be ah shunned from Society. That's that's your opinion. Probably you won't be really popular with red-haired people. But it's like who cares. |
| 30:01.57 | mikebledsoe | yeah yeah I had this conversation. Um I've had this conversation with my girlfriend a couple times which is like you know she I I ah I'm a fan of freedom so much that sometimes hurt like she's like having to catch up with me. |
| 30:18.33 | Max Shank | Her her. |
| 30:18.79 | mikebledsoe | And understanding how how it works and you know and she goes Well, what do you think about like people being able to discriminate on you know who's allowed in their store or not or or ah should someone be able to get fired just because of you know their race and I'm like yeah. I mean people are suing companies for getting fired so but they don't really actually want to work there but you want to work for somebody who's racist but like I think these policies that put people together that would normally not get along. |
| 30:45.10 | Max Shank | But I. |
| 30:56.15 | mikebledsoe | Doesn't cause them to actually get along. It's basically forcing people to interact who would who would normally voluntary in voluntarily not interact which could be an argument for reduction in total violence if people just go look you guys are gonna stay over there because I have this worldview and I'm going to stay over here because I have this worldview. |
| 30:56.47 | Max Shank | The. |
| 31:15.89 | mikebledsoe | Then Ah, we'd have a lot more peace but I think that. |
| 31:19.40 | Max Shank | It's like the chess club and the bat the baseball club don't really hang out. |
| 31:21.27 | mikebledsoe | Right? And so like this this idea that like because that government caused segregation and then all of a sudden ah government becomes the cause for integration and it's in both cases it causes violence. And so I think if you just let people if the government was responsible for segregation which it was and then they just said you know what we're not going to cut no more rules around Segregation Society would a piece of peacefully integrated I believe a lot more quickly and peacefully. Then what we witnessed. Ah, it was extremely violent because it went it just swung from 1 side of the pendulum to another inside of this idea that the government is in ultimate control over who we interact with. |
| 32:11.84 | Max Shank | Well, and ultimately you can't have a conditional statement for every eventuality back to the whole computer science thing of if this then this if this than this you would just have an even bigger. Book of rules and really the only thing we should be concerned with is coercion right? like it doesn't matter if um, you are a racist like think how hard it is to be a racist you got to carry that hate with you every day. Or or even worse just imagine if you were a pedophile that would be probably like the worst luck of the draw ever and as long as that person doesn't act on that. That's probably just like okay you know what I mean like even. In India for example and I'm just using this example because it's the 1 that is the most inflammatory but in India you have arranged marriage between 30 year old dudes and 12 year old girls all the time that's common practice. But this idea that. We should um basically like minority report people for what they say is problematic like if someone feels a certain way. That's not a crime if someone coerces another person then it is a crime and I think. Extending the jurisdiction. Beyond coercion is a real mistake and that's where you get this more like hive mind Mentality. You get an over concentration of power and no question. There are advantages. To a concentration of power but they're also extreme disadvantages just the same if you are going to put all your eggs in 1 Basket. You know I just remember this video of Mussolini giving a speech and he just raised his fists in the air and goes 1 country 1 decision and everyone's like. Yeah they're so excited that they don't have to make any decisions anymore because he's gonna do all that hard work for him and that is a natural sentiment. We. We want to get we want to get more for less. We don't want to do anything. It's very natural. So. |
| 34:32.56 | mikebledsoe | Well I think I. |
| 34:41.50 | Max Shank | We want to be as efficient as possible, but there's a huge cost to that you are putting yourself at risk of total loss rather than diversifying that power along all the people. That's why it's so important to vote with your dollars. |
| 34:57.84 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, did you listen to that you listen to that rogan I don't listen to a lot of rogan but every once in a while something comes on my radar that that North korean woman. Did you listen that whole episode. Yeah, ah 1 of the things that really struck me with that was. |
| 35:00.85 | Max Shank | It's an it's a self-correting. |
| 35:08.69 | Max Shank | Um, yeah I did. |
| 35:17.63 | mikebledsoe | And think we even talked about this now that I'm thinking about it is she said that when she was exposed to freedom. She had a hard time she if she there was too many choices. There are so many choices to make that within five minutes she had become physically fatigued and mentally for. |
| 35:29.81 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 35:37.53 | mikebledsoe | Fatigue from being exposed to choice because she didn't have any because Kim jong un was making all the decisions for her. Ah her entire life. So as a 13 year old is just oh what do you want to eat well how many options do I have oh a dozen. |
| 35:45.14 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 35:55.76 | Max Shank | What What do you want to watch on Tv tonight you can pick from any of these four hundred thousand view options. Yes to it's too many choices. So that's kind of that's the positive side of distributing those choices. |
| 35:55.97 | mikebledsoe | Okay, this is this really got difficult. |
| 36:01.89 | mikebledsoe | Oh my God I can't watch Tv because of that. |
| 36:15.90 | Max Shank | Like part of the reason family units have often worked so well in the past is because you have what's called comparative advantage. You know the lady um will just alienate all the ladies now too. You know back in the day. The lady would take care of the house and. As a homeowner myself I think that's a super important job taking care of a house is is its own job. Especially if you have kids around women are naturally better at nesting and nurturing the guy goes out. He just focuses on 1 thing which is going. And bringing home the bacon whether he's a farmer or a hunter or ah, a businessman of some kind so divvying up the responsibilities based on ability is super beneficial. So it's natural that you would want to. Get the people who are best at what they do to do the job for you. |
| 37:16.58 | mikebledsoe | Agreeing. Ah, one last note I want to make on the hate speech is 1 of the things that I've noticed is well yeah, um I think if you say something racist is is the number 1 thing. |
| 37:21.91 | Max Shank | I Still don't even know what that means was it mean naughty words. |
| 37:33.30 | Max Shank | Shut up Pinky Shut up pinky. |
| 37:33.28 | mikebledsoe | Or homophobic or something like that. What's that? yeah so that what? um, well yeah, but well my ah my buddy danny who's from Wahaca he's mexican and they. |
| 37:40.87 | Max Shank | Um, we're hardly white. Definitely definitely Pink. There. |
| 37:53.17 | mikebledsoe | He's like I don't know why we're called colored people and you're white you guys change colors all the time you get red you get white. You get like you like you're always changing colors like I'm the same color all the time you're the colored people. Ah but the the thing that's made me. Ah, anytime. |
| 38:01.53 | Max Shank | Like moon. Yeah. |
| 38:12.60 | mikebledsoe | Somebody in the last couple of years you know racism has been such ah a prominent conversation in the last couple years is people go oh that person's racist and I go well why? and then ah ah, a lot. Ah a lot of times. There's not a specific instance. They just. |
| 38:24.32 | Max Shank | It's an ad hom attack. So easy. |
| 38:29.98 | mikebledsoe | It's become the common narrative that that person's racist and then they'll take words out of context for instance like Trump people say Trump's racist. |
| 38:31.37 | Max Shank | Um, but the. Or how about any of the many things that I've said on this podcast. There are enough 5 to ten second clips on here that could have me pilloried. Ah. |
| 38:43.51 | mikebledsoe | And so it's people will go Oh there's there's there's like plot for Trump For instance I'm not a Trump fan didn't vote for him. So ah, that makes me good. Well this is There's my caveat to the this my argument here. |
| 38:53.72 | Max Shank | That makes you good to to most of the listeners. |
| 39:02.65 | mikebledsoe | Which is I Also don't think he's racist I don't think he's so many of the things that the media made him out to be and ah and because he did a lot of things that if you look at it policy wise he did a lot of things for the black community if you look at it ah at black and white. On paper. He did more than Barack Obama did for the black community and yet he got painted a racist because who the fuck really knows why that that he was. He's unpopular amongst the elites. That's that's what makes me curious about that guy. Again I'm not a big fan I'm not a Q Andon Person. Ah and it has been interesting to watch people go really pro Trump as much as you know is when they I just feel like there's a big opportunity that was missed and that people are they just shift. Who they think should be the Authority instead of realizing that it's that the authority is ah is a artificial construct. But ah. |
| 40:05.98 | Max Shank | It's. |
| 40:11.45 | Max Shank | It's all a means of disqualifying the argument of the individual or hyperqualify hey you know trust Doctor science ah fuck this racist pedophile guy I mean if I ever. |
| 40:17.11 | mikebledsoe | Oop. |
| 40:22.54 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 40:26.32 | Max Shank | Started if I was ever in a race for office I would never discuss the policy of my opponent I Would only say I can't believe that I have to run against such a racist pedophile with a dog fighting ring in his basement I Don't think the American people. Want to have a racist pedophile dog abuser in office am I right? people I would never I would never I would never talk about policy people don't care I would only attack the worst things this guy could do ever. |
| 40:56.98 | mikebledsoe | Well I mean that this is what happened the narrative in the last election was the Democrats are pedophiles and the republicans are a racist. It's pretty much like that it was just if you really take a step back. You go? Oh yeah, that was. |
| 41:07.92 | Max Shank | Um, it's just name. It's just name calling. Yeah. |
| 41:16.80 | mikebledsoe | That was except the only thing was was it was alternative media that was pumping up the pedophilia conversation. It was mainstream media that was pumping up the racist conversation up. Yeah Abc Nbc cnn. |
| 41:24.10 | Max Shank | Well, what's mainstream just the big the big names. What's funny if you look at the amount of actual viewers now and the amount of traffic people like Joe Rogan actually have way more. Ah. |
| 41:39.25 | mikebledsoe | Joe Rogan has more gets more downloads than I think all the major news agencies have combined. |
| 41:46.95 | Max Shank | Well I was talking to a good friend of mine and even he agrees because very mainstream guy you know watching all the different news stations and he's like you know Joe Rogan We agreed has just built up so much credibility because he has done so many hours and so many hours where. |
| 42:06.62 | mikebledsoe | Um, no yeah I wouldn't want to fight the man. |
| 42:06.69 | Max Shank | He's not arrogant and I mean maybe about fighting sometimes but he does know a lot about fighting too. No no, no, no, no, no, definitely not I Just mean about like knowing about styles of fighting like he knows so much and sometimes you're like oh really? okay. |
| 42:20.21 | mikebledsoe | Right? right. |
| 42:26.70 | Max Shank | But he doesn't Lie. He doesn't try to hide Anything. He's very open about everything so he's actually built up this crazy credibility and that's something super powerful and I'm sure he has some awareness. The clout that he has developed but that's got to be such a ah scary thing at the same time knowing Yeah, it's amazing I Hope he wins. Yeah yeah I Hope he wins. |
| 42:44.50 | mikebledsoe | Oh I'm sure. Well you hear he's ah he's suing Cnn Yeah I Hope he gets a lot of money out of them. Yeah, but of course Cnn just has a budget for that kind of shit. So. |
| 43:02.20 | Max Shank | Um, well it's probably being funded by our taxpayer dollars and money that is printed out of thin air I mean you look at the way that well you look at the way that. |
| 43:09.48 | mikebledsoe | Well pharmaceutical companies I mean yeah, the money the money's going the money's going from them printing it off to the pharmaceutical companies to the news media. That's that's the line of information. That's how the information is flowing right now. And you can tell because Pfizer is fucking advertising like crazy I I can find a super clip where someone put together that super clip which is basically how much Pfizer is advertising on the news where people are going to get information about. |
| 43:32.50 | Max Shank | I saw. |
| 43:45.94 | mikebledsoe | How they're going to live their life basically ah and make decisions and what they believe and then everything is advertised. Do you think that if you were 1 a top Journalist for cnn is there any benefit to you ah talking negatively about vaccinations. That's right. |
| 44:01.19 | Max Shank | Only if I want to lose my job mike. |
| 44:05.87 | mikebledsoe | So it's sponsors in a way can be a form of censorship. So if say we say we took on a sponsor and this yeah. |
| 44:14.60 | Max Shank | Of course flaming hot Cheetos get at us. |
| 44:22.45 | mikebledsoe | We're never going to talk shit about Cheetos if that happens we're only going to talk about how many cheetahs we had over the weekend. How tasty they were. Oh yeah yeah. yeah |
| 44:26.67 | Max Shank | We might even invent a fat loss diet based on flaming hot cheetos which would be easy to do I think you could eat a diet of like forty percent of your calories. From flaming hot cheetos and still lose weight as long as everything else was dialed in. |
| 44:40.98 | mikebledsoe | But ah, something something just jumped into my my awareness here that the conversation we've had so far has actually been very dense even though you know you and I are just having fun but I can imagine somebody says hey you need to listen to this show. Check out this show on censorship that mike and Max did and when they're listening. They might if this is the first time they're exposed to this type of conversation could be getting overwhelmed and going oh shit I don't believe anything and I say that because I've I've been in conversations where before where I can. Watch people physically start to contort their body because they realize how much they don't know they they begin to yeah, they begin to realize and what ends up happening is like you can't unknow what you know ah at ah. |
| 45:23.29 | Max Shank | Well, it's very uncomfortable. |
| 45:33.67 | Max Shank | If you drink enough booze you can. |
| 45:35.36 | mikebledsoe | For certain things. Yeah, it's true. But ah you you can't unknow this shit and people get uncomfortable because it it you begin to realize that 1 hundred percent of the responsibility is on your shoulders when you thought that it was on someone else's Shoulders. And that that responsibility is scary and when you take on the responsibility of developing your own Wisdom. It's a lot of work and going back to your efficiency thing. You know people are become very accustomed to a high amount of. Efficiency and um I mean some could blame capitalism for that and because there's this this level of comfort and not having to think and then all of a sudden we lay something out there. So I I bring that up because I want to acknowledge it for anyone who's listening and just say. You know it's okay, it's okay, you go fuck I don't know what to believe anymore. All the information is false. Um, yeah I mean just and I think that way you got to get to that point is understanding that most of what you think is a lie and yeah. |
| 46:47.75 | Max Shank | I'll simplify it down if you if you don't mind. Yeah, it's I like to take things to the extremes I don't know if you've noticed that about me. But. |
| 46:50.98 | mikebledsoe | Please. |
| 46:56.53 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, I'm not accustomed to that type of lifestyle. |
| 47:01.94 | Max Shank | You're you're more of a middle ground type of guy. Ah, okay, if you had to choose between believing everything you read and see and believing nothing you believe and see then it would be safer to believe nothing so it's safer to believe nothing. And you can be sure that there's always an intent behind every message that you see to persuasion just to get you to buy to try to cry to laugh. Whatever and my my personal it goes back to once again, computer science which is. So heavily logic based I so I still know like almost nothing about it but the concept of trust but verify and that verify is your responsibility.. It's always your responsibility to verify for yourself and you. |
| 47:58.19 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well well, there's there's been Ah, there's been a trick played on the common person and that ah ah, the fact, the fact, the fact checkers. The fact checkers. |
| 48:10.15 | Max Shank | You can't possibly know. |
| 48:16.16 | mikebledsoe | Are playing the role of verify people think they're verifying by doing a Google search and seeing fact check in the title and then go. |
| 48:21.97 | Max Shank | No, no, it's your responsibility to verify. You're right though that is a trap. |
| 48:26.72 | mikebledsoe | But people people think they are verifying when they do that because people will Google and they go well fact check I'm like really yeah. |
| 48:32.20 | Max Shank | But that's just that's just trusting another guy like so whenever you're thinking about these things. It's best to try to reduce the number of parties involved. So for example, if there are 3 of us you me and some other guy. And some other guy says hey mike if you give me a hundred bucks now I'll give you a thousand next week and then you're like hu and let me verify that and you ask me and I'm like yeah you can trust him that's like basically the same thing it doesn't change anything right. So you have to keep it always does come back to that responsibility is upon the individual and if you take the responsibility which is your ability to respond also away from the individual then you are opening the door for totalitarianism which. There are advantages and disadvantages. You can move much further much faster I think china has gotten a lot more people out of poverty in the last twenty years than before under a form of totalitarianism. But. |
| 49:46.29 | mikebledsoe | Ah, totalitarianism combined with capitalism. |
| 49:48.28 | Max Shank | With that concentration right? That's very good point So we have capitalism combined with we have Crony capitalism. |
| 49:57.96 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 49:59.32 | Max Shank | Unfortunately, which is where you're allowed to lobby and make rules that are not the same for everybody and all these backwards incentives. But my point is there are advantages to concentrating power and there are also huge disadvantages and if you blindly follow something you are opening the door. For a very small minority to call the shots for everybody and that's basically what slavery looks like and you might be a happy little slave but you're still not free or responsible for Yourself. You got to follow the money with all this stuff. That's the best. That's the best. |
| 50:28.64 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, yeah. |
| 50:37.20 | Max Shank | Paper trail or trail crumbs to find out. What's really going on is how's that money changing hands. And yeah, you know what? I've I've gone through a similar thing just back to what you're saying. It's it's super uncomfortable to realize that. Most of what you taught you were taught was a waste of time and most of the information that's been passed off as news has been flagrant lies with only the intention of making you more dependent and ah obedient. You know by Bye bye trust trust trust. |
| 51:14.63 | mikebledsoe | But ah, 1 of the things you're talking about you've been talking about you know? Ah, it's trusting someone else creates efficiency but also leaves door open for abuse and 1 of the things that I tell people. |
| 51:15.96 | Max Shank | Right? It's uncomfortable. But. |
| 51:33.50 | mikebledsoe | When we start talking about where are you getting your information talking about the verify piece where are you getting your information while I'm getting it from this person. My great and you know say they're talking about something like a virus. It's like yeah I'm not a virologist you know I am not going to know a lot about that I would say that I know a lot about health. |
| 51:35.31 | Max Shank | My. |
| 51:52.30 | Max Shank | I would say so I'll verify that you know a lot about health fact I fact checked you? Yeah check mark. |
| 51:52.90 | mikebledsoe | Which I think is really all you gotta know? Ah, yeah, thank you thank you listen to Max folks. He's smart guy. Yeah fact, check complete. So um, my my thing is when I start talking to people about who I listen to so. Yeah I I don't pretend like I've gone out and obtained all the knowledge and wisdom in the world. But what I do is I listen to wise people and ah and I qualify those people is what's the advice they've given over time which I think people have all our time. Even running that filter people don't really remember their their attention spans pretty fucking short. So what is their track record. That's my first thing when it comes to verifying is is what's their track record. Not not what pieces of paper. They've got not what credentials not what are not what are the letters behind their name. My question is. |
| 52:33.20 | Max Shank | Everybody man 1 |
| 52:42.36 | Max Shank | Community not. |
| 52:49.12 | mikebledsoe | What's their track record how sort of I'm listening to somebody about Health I Go What's their health like this is why I listen to Paul Check people go you know? Ah, ah you Know'm I'm gonna listen to this person or this person because they have these credentials and I go yeah but Paul check is is a. Great example of this. Not only has he mastered his own health The dude 60 years old and I'm pretty sure he can outlift me ah and he he ah he moves Well he has you know. |
| 53:16.54 | Max Shank | Ah, well you you don't really prioritize lifting. But that's true. He could. |
| 53:26.98 | mikebledsoe | Is sex life is vibrant from what I can tell the way he talks about it anyway. Ah the guy. Ah but all the Paul Trek fans are gonna laugh there. Ah but there. |
| 53:30.98 | Max Shank | Um, I thought I thought you had participated never mind. |
| 53:45.28 | mikebledsoe | I think we share a lot of the same audience. Um, but but he's got ah, he's got a track record of helping other people and he's mastered in himself and like who else am I who else has done that at 60 |
| 53:46.82 | Max Shank | I Think it's right What you're saying is right? It's about track record. |
| 53:58.13 | Max Shank | So he walks the walk. He has a track record that you have seen develop over time and also the other thing that I would add to that is the incentive. |
| 53:59.90 | mikebledsoe | You know Andy's older and he's got. He's got the wisdom on its side that time. |
| 54:14.37 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 54:15.31 | Max Shank | What's the incentive. So when you're trying to um, decipher a new bit of information and part of it is just reducing the total bits. Otherwise you're going to be bombarded with a fire hose but who is to gain from what you're hearing that that is the number 1 question. So take everything else off the table who who gains from this message that you're hearing that is the number 1 thing is incentive and then because that's just about the argument and then the second part is consider the source. So that's where you start seeing. Okay well this person has led me led me the right way for a long time meanwhile the laundry list of lies and misinformation about health from these allegedly trusted entities. Is a mile long I mean how about eggs and it doesn't matter if the intentions are good even intentions. Good bad doesn't matter. It's more about what is the result of those things. So if if you're afraid of fruit because it's got too much sugar. |
| 55:23.79 | mikebledsoe | What's the outcome does it this kind of goes in and I hate Speech this goes in the hate speech thing because like what people say what they do are different but this where outcome outcome is ah very important here. |
| 55:29.84 | Max Shank | Yeah, of course like why would we? Well you know for Healthcare like why would we let the people making the decisions about Healthcare have a different plan than they agreed On. That's insanity. That's crazy. They so the people who create policy for Health. Don't use that same plan. Yeah, that's insane. That's insane like where is the Incentive. So. |
| 55:50.00 | mikebledsoe | That can you repeat that. So the people Oh oh you talk about the medical care. Yeah. |
| 56:06.42 | Max Shank | Incentive is the number 1 thing considering the source is probably the number 2 thing and then maybe the third thing is just an overall reduction in the amount of bits that you take in and this is tough because Dopamine is all about an external thing. You take in. You're like oh something something from out there to add in to my my self here and it takes you away from potentially creating really valuable projects and the the thing is you don't need to be. Plugged in all the time you don't need to be absorbing every new bit of misinformation out there. In fact, all it does mostly is distract you from what's really important in your life which is nurturing the relationships that you care about or nurturing the projects that you care about. And creating and expressing yourself in different ways and I I really like the simple idea of if you don't express you will feel depressed simple as that and it doesn't matter if you paint or play music or. |
| 57:16.54 | mikebledsoe | If. |
| 57:23.70 | Max Shank | Chat with a friend for a few hours or an hour. There are lots of ways to express yourself? Um, but if you're constantly seeking that the feed from outside you're going to become like mentally obese and it's going to be full of toxic bullshit. |
| 57:42.60 | mikebledsoe | A a. |
| 57:43.54 | Max Shank | Right? So just to recap its incentive source and then probably reduction would be like the third if I had to pick 3 |
| 57:52.27 | mikebledsoe | I like it. It's a good that's a good ah order to go in you'll you'll ah I think by just applying the first 2 you'll reduce the amount of people you're even looking at or piece information you're you're paying attention to. |
| 58:04.66 | Max Shank | Oh yeah, people would say that I'm crazy for how little I trust anything I read or see but not nuds. It's true because. |
| 58:12.44 | mikebledsoe | Um, well I I think that if you've ever gone through the process of questioning what you believe and what you think I think if you've never done that which most people have never sat there and analyzed their own thinking and gone is what I believe actually true. Once you believe once you have had the experience of realizing that most of your thoughts are complete bullshit then you should then understand that everyone else's thoughts are just they probably have the same amount of bullshit running around and most people are just expressing. They're bullshit all the time and the majority of what's flying around is just bullshit. There's very little truth very little truth in there. Totally unintentional. |
| 58:53.92 | Max Shank | And it's not ah and and it's often not intentional. You know for a long time I I was told the knees should not cross the toes during a squat if you're bending over your back should not bend. |
| 59:10.31 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, right? yeah. |
| 59:12.36 | Max Shank | In fact, basically your back should never bend under load is this thing I believed and some people still believe that some people believe the exact opposite of that and and that's okay too. But oh yeah, oh yeah I mean. |
| 59:21.88 | mikebledsoe | Have you seen this knees over toes guy on Instagram his shit is good and his whole his whole his whole the name of his Instagram is controversial and he's blowing up. It's good. |
| 59:31.36 | Max Shank | I. Right? It's it's brilliant as brilliant marketing I think it looks mostly sound. Obviously it's not the way that I would approach overall health and fitness. But I think the message is overall good. Which is you're not fragile and it's good to bravely explore these ranges of motion. Um I got did I tell you about the third round monkeys third round monkey rule is perfect for this episode. |
| 59:59.80 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:00:07.35 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 01:00:12.70 | Max Shank | Its really short. It's not that short, but it's short enough. Yeah, sure. |
| 01:00:13.14 | mikebledsoe | Do you want to you want to take this show an hour and a half by the typical hour because I I think we have might I've covered like half of what's in my fucking Notebook right now. |
| 01:00:23.80 | Max Shank | Well, let's let's let it ride but here's an important thing to realize and it's about Mythology. So Third round I have all these that I try to organize stuff. So it's simpler to remember so I have this 1 called Third round monkeys which is about a scientific study. They did. With monkeys in a room with a ladder and a bowl of fruit at the top and so they had like 6 monkeys in there and 1 starts to go up for the fruit and the researchers immediately hose off all the Monkeys. With a fire hose all of them. Not just the 1 who climbed up for it and so then they all stop doing that so they're all just sitting around not going near the ladder because they know they'll get the hose and then they take out half the monkeys and replace them. With new monkeys. So now you have a combined group a and group b 1 of the new monkeys starts climbing up the ladder and 1 of the older ones are the all the older ones start beating it up because they know that if he does that they're all going to get the hose. So then once again, you have this group of like 6 monkeys or so doing nothing then they take away the first monkeys and they add in the third round monkeys same thing. 1 of the new monkeys. Sees a bowl of bananas or fruit or something up there starts going up the ladder and the second round monkeys beat him up mercilessly and so now you have like 6 monkeys not going near the fruit and none of them have seen the fire hose. They don't know why they don't know why they're beating. They're beating these new Monkeys. They just know that if you go up the ladder you get beaten and that's how a lot of information gets transmitted. It's just I was talking with ah my friend victoria. |
| 01:02:31.56 | mikebledsoe | Bunch of hearsay. |
| 01:02:34.98 | Max Shank | The other day and we were playing this game called ah fuck that last guy high five that last guy because so many things from the past are amazing. It's incredible and some things. We're just like oh fuck that guy that guy sucks like he really ruined it for everybody else and that's sort of how we have gotten to this point some things you blindly believe but we don't We don't really know why. |
| 01:02:52.94 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 01:03:08.53 | mikebledsoe | Probably most things so lot lot has just been passed down. |
| 01:03:15.45 | Max Shank | I'm kind of I'm becoming more and more and of of ah, an objectivist but there's a caveat to that because objectivism is like just believing what you can experience firsthand but I also believe there's obvious be way more than that. |
| 01:03:25.25 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, but also. |
| 01:03:32.18 | Max Shank | That is beyond my sensory perception. |
| 01:03:33.54 | mikebledsoe | Well I think I think that the I would say this the way I'm very objective is the way I operate is is I I Really do my best to believe only what I can verify with my own senses and ah everything else. |
| 01:03:52.70 | Max Shank | Yeah, that's tricky. |
| 01:03:52.13 | mikebledsoe | Just take with a grain of salt which like maybe maybe and then also you know the way that I think you and I both live our lives is we have done enough reflection to create our ah philosophy and principles in which we live our lives and which means that. I don't have to know that much information you don't have to know that information to make good choices. Ah, and so for instance, the idea of what we see what we witness in nature is what happens anytime we isolate something. We isolate a cell from being able to talk to other cells in the human Body. What happens the cell starts to replicate in a way that causes cancer right? when it can't communicate with the other cells. Yeah it it dies but and and it's. |
| 01:04:40.15 | Max Shank | Or it dies right? I mean depends on the environment. |
| 01:04:46.35 | mikebledsoe | And it's attempt to live on it will replicate unhealth in an unhealthy way. Yeah, it'll die or it'll replicate in a cancer way right? has no direction right? It's not getting the right inputs. Um, what's a. |
| 01:04:50.49 | Max Shank | Um, in in an in a way that is that has no direction. Basically it's like growth without direction bingo. |
| 01:05:05.40 | mikebledsoe | But guy who described this. He's a really he used to work in cancer and now he he's ah he's 1 these really great docs to listen to. Ah, he's is my name maybe his name will pop into my head here in a minute but ah, ah, but when things are integrated when you integrate something like. A lot of what happens with health is how well things are integrated with each other and in systems support each other and everything is whether the cell or an organ or your joints if you so if you've studied health and you really recognize? oh. And you witness what are the results of isolation and what are this the results of of integration and then you watch that happen socially to what are the results of isolation and what are the results of integration and. Not force integration but just allowing things to integrate naturally. |
| 01:05:58.30 | Max Shank | No system works in isolation is a phrase for health. |
| 01:06:02.30 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and so I don't need to understand all the details of how these people theoretically think this virus works by the way. It's all theory. The basis in which. The virologists are making decisions. It's based on a theory which is called Germ Theory ah that was the 1 Yeah. |
| 01:06:21.75 | Max Shank | Ah, crap we're gonna get censored now fuck that was it that was the that was the 1 thing you're not allowed to talk about I said fag earlier we were probably gonna be okay with that. It's because those guys can take a joke. |
| 01:06:33.90 | mikebledsoe | Ah, we definitelin? Yeah, so but ah, you know people people. It's 1 of those things I get in conversation with people I'm like why are you operating from germ theory or are you more familiar with terrain theory. And then people go I don't know what you're talking about I go oh well, do you believe that you know just being exposed to a germ is going to make you sick and like well yeah, that's that's what's happening they go. Okay, then then you're a germ theory person. You don't even know it and yet that's the postulate in which. All these arguments are being made from the idea of isolating yourself. Don't go outside wear a mask stay 6 feet apart. These are all isolated. This isolation makes sense inside of germ theory. But even the person who founded germ theory. Ah, with his name Louis pasture was 1 of the the people who really put germ theory on the map at the end of his life of saying I made a fucking mistake. You know he was the 1 that was in charge of pasteurizing milk. Best of intentions but seti made a mistake so you got this guy that everyone praises for for inventing pasteurization. |
| 01:07:40.77 | Max Shank | With the best of intentions. |
| 01:07:50.14 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 01:07:50.77 | mikebledsoe | We passed here and yet at the end of his life. He says don't do what I said earlier stay away from it and yet no 1 listens to that. so so um everybody governments medical boards. All these things bought into germ theory and ah. |
| 01:07:56.64 | Max Shank | What how tricky. |
| 01:08:09.80 | mikebledsoe | I go back to? Well, what's the result of our medical system operating from ah germ theory. Well what are we produced. We have record breaking Obesity diabetes cancer. We have record breaking all these sicknesses and mental health as well. There's a lot. |
| 01:08:22.42 | Max Shank | Well, there are a lot of things involved in that right. |
| 01:08:27.76 | mikebledsoe | There's a lot but it is the result of how things are and and 1 of them is the result of Germ theory. Yeah, and so going back to I've done a lot of philosophical thinking you've done a lot of philosophical philosophical Thinking. We're studying principles of things I don't have to understand. What type of spike protein is on this virus to understand that I do not want to isolate myself I do want to breathe a lot of different air I do want to get sunlight I do want to exercise I do want to. Um, improve my mental health which is gonna improve my physical health by being social and having community and um and it. |
| 01:09:06.35 | Max Shank | And you're willing to take that risk yourself because that is what risk you feel comfortable with taking but the tricky thing is the false argument that. Following The narrative will be better than doing nothing and the trick is there's no way to test for that Now. Um, and everybody is arguing about like oh you know? Well Scandinavia did this and China did this and these people did this and you know Ultimately, if. You are not allowed to decide what risks you take? You're not free if you're not allowed to say no then you're not free and anytime it starts getting back into that um appeal to Authority or ad hom and an attack. It just opens the door for all kinds of evil shit to happen and we don't really know what the cost of this alleged solution will be and you know just to go back to the germ theory thing. There's a buckminster Fuller quote I like which is there's nothing in a caterpillar. That says it's going to be a butterfly. |
| 01:10:27.35 | Max Shank | There's there's nothing in there. There's no, there's no clue that that is going to happen. Nothing would indicate that that but it does does happen over and over again and the same thing is true with an individual's health look. |
| 01:10:35.10 | mikebledsoe | You know. |
| 01:10:42.30 | Max Shank | We we start talking about the obesity thing right? Holy lord there are a lot of fat people is it their fault. No is it their responsibility. Yes, and that's a big distinction that also helps people overcome the shame because. Probably you don't know what their life is like you don't know what kind of trauma they've been through they probably had fat parents so in a certain sense. It's not their fault but it is their responsibility. Um, and I think that's the only way that you break a cycle right? If you look back with resentment. And blame you don't break the cycle. You just perpetuate that cycle. That's why all this like racism shit is so fucked because all it does is perpetuate the cycle and it only seeks to incentivize the ah. I'll just call them folks who who benefit from all of that kind of strife and disarray. You know the race-baiting type of people people whose career is to like cry racism people whose career is to cry sexism people whose career is to cry. Oh you know. Tax the rich, whatever it's like so ridiculous, but it just goes back to the importance of incentive. |
| 01:12:02.92 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's great to look at that. Um, damn we didn't get very far in the list of talking about but I want to mention I think I think that what we've been. We've been addressing this topic from a very principle based. Perspective and so that list of that I I made earlier in the show I think that is all a lot of things we mentioned pretty much explain why it might you know. Those things are arguments against it but from more of a principle base without having to get into the details of each 1 because we just would use the same argument over and over for for most of these that we started with hate speech on but I want to talk about the different types of censorship because there's overt censorship and covert censorship. And so people who are experiencing censorship a lot of times don't realize they're experiencing it because there is not this organization called the propaganda machine that or the the censorship administration that is ah that is. Single source of information like it is in North korea and even those people don't realize because they don't know anything outside of that that they're being fed propaganda like they just yeah, how would you know? So um, yeah, not their fault and in the united states what we have. |
| 01:13:20.54 | Max Shank | How would you know? no, it's not their fault. |
| 01:13:31.39 | mikebledsoe | Is that what what I would say is a the illusion of freedom is largely at play and that you have access.. There's ah you have more options right? but your options always they they only fall inside of this this fairly narrow range ah and like people. People talk about you know they associate democracy and freedom I'm like democracy is better than communism. But it's not really that much better.. Ah yeah, a true democracy which we don't live in a true democracy. |
| 01:13:59.22 | Max Shank | Democracy is majority rules right. |
| 01:14:08.27 | mikebledsoe | Ah, we live in a Republic in the United states. But yeah, the the idea of a pure democracy is majority rules terrible terrible I mean if anyone wants to stand up for the minority. The that is democracy is the worst possible scenario for minorities. |
| 01:14:12.90 | Max Shank | Ah, majority rules is a horrible idea. |
| 01:14:24.98 | Max Shank | Of course it almost seems self-evident. |
| 01:14:26.39 | mikebledsoe | Um, and yeah by by it's it. Yeah, oh trust me, it's not I've dropped that on people and they go what do you mean? Yeah, like well if you only you know I need fifty 1 percent to tell the other forty nine percent. What to do. |
| 01:14:43.43 | Max Shank | Well I mean think of it this way if you live in a cul-de-sac with 2 other folks and they both vote to take your house. Do you have to give it to them like that's the kind of thing that we're talking about here that is insane and when you shrink it down to. |
| 01:14:55.66 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah. |
| 01:15:02.78 | Max Shank | Smaller groups like that. It's easier to understand what's really going on because so fuzzy. It's fuzzy. |
| 01:15:04.45 | mikebledsoe | Well, yeah, when it gets when it's in that large group. It's people's people's ability to comprehend just goes out the fucking window. Plus they were taught at a young age that this is how it works and I guess believed it? Um, yeah, so we have overt and covert. Ah, 1 is ah is like I said sponsors having sponsors is ah can be ah, can create ah censorship. Another 1 is shadow banning which is something shadow banning came to my attention. Just a few years ago when it started happening to a few of my friends who are health advocates and they have had a long history of doing a lot of good for a lot of people and spreading a lot of good information about how to be healthy in regenerative farming and all these things. |
| 01:15:43.69 | Max Shank | Um, and. |
| 01:15:51.29 | Max Shank | On here. |
| 01:15:56.50 | mikebledsoe | And all of a sudden they go from 30000 views in a month to a thousand and what happened was was the Google or whoever um, started shifting the algorithm to exclude them from being the top search results when people are trying to figure out how to be healthy. |
| 01:15:59.69 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 01:16:15.70 | mikebledsoe | And as you can imagine what ends up on the first page is a lot more traditional things that again, we go back to incentives. Wow there's a lot more things that are backed by pharmaceutical companies and yada yada yada and so like health line is is now a trusted source of medical advice. Versus you know, somebody who has you know and again and then it ends up being these these organizations that don't have a face to them. They're faceless organizations like who am I actually listening to here. Oh it's cnn who the fuck is cnn so um, the. Shadow banning is basically something that happens I'm sure there's a version of it. That's gone for a long time but in the age of information and and google searches and stuff like that. Um is basically these tech company using using algorithms to hide information and to. Highlight other information. So it's not 1 of those things where it's completely taken down. They're just and and all the algorithms are secret so you don't know how they work it's that's 1 way that these companies compete with each other but because there's no transparency about Algorithms. This is top secret information. There's no way to know that they are if you really do only rely on google searches to get your answers. You are being heavily heavily censored because they're choosing what you see and the information you take in forms your thoughts. And so if you're a person who fucking picks up your phone first thing in the morning and checks your email gmail is actually deciding what you what? you? What information you're seeing and you know there's little ads in there's little There's little things and it's not just your email that you see when you open up. Gmail. There's other things so on your phone I think it's a little bit cleaner but you you log online and wherever whatever you're opening pages so Facebook or Instagram is the first thing you check Instagram and facebook is deciding what you what your first thought of the day is. |
| 01:18:21.40 | Max Shank | Well and they're deciding I mean I basically don't touch anything electronic for the first hour or 2 every morning depend or or later it just depends and I get out the. |
| 01:18:23.70 | mikebledsoe | You think that's going to have an impact on the rest of your day and the rest of your thoughts up so fucking lootly. |
| 01:18:32.97 | mikebledsoe | Same. |
| 01:18:39.18 | Max Shank | Old school pen and paper here and it's very sneaky because it's not I don't think it started out sinister and probably it isn't even sinister because everyone thinks they're good. No 1 thinks they're the bad guy really. |
| 01:18:40.28 | mikebledsoe | Um, if I yeah. |
| 01:18:58.80 | Max Shank | So we have this phenomenon where Google Youtube for example, has built up such a monumental library so that everybody wants to go in there and it's still it's still their library. |
| 01:19:13.00 | mikebledsoe | Want to. |
| 01:19:18.70 | Max Shank | So in a certain sense. They can choose what they want to show on that library. What they want to highlight on that library. Um, but I mean it's it's kind of tricky if you are a. Takes you back to the responsibility of the individual you have to decide for yourself. What trough you are going to drink from basically like are you going to put all your eggs in that basket and you know personally that's um, that's why I just. I do self-censor because I know that the the risk is not worth the potential reward and it's important to own your customer list as well for that very reason I mean just like you mentioned there are people who have been had their businesses taken down by like ninety percent or even. Ah, hundred percent because they have said the wrong thing and it's legally it's very tricky because if you are. A platform does that mean you can edit things and if you edit things does that make you a publisher which means you're responsible for all of the content that is being published on that site. So it's very. It's very tricky legal thing. That's why I think the simpler way is just to have. Freedom of speech and let people um, choose what they want to choose um just from a business standpoint though I would say you have to control your customer list because you never know how things are going to change from a user stand from a user standpoint none of these. |
| 01:20:53.26 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:21:00.28 | Max Shank | Have your best interest at heart they only they only have 1 incentive which is to maximize your time using their service and they may have ulterior motives. Um, that are. |
| 01:21:00.50 | mikebledsoe | What. |
| 01:21:16.30 | Max Shank | Maybe like more sinister like gaining power or political backdoor dealings and stuff like that. So you just have to understand that reality like when I use youtube for example I have it a distraction free which means it takes away the comments and the. Suggested video bar so it just looks totally blank and there's just like a little search bar in the middle because I still I still use this 1 of the best resources around so you got to just take responsibility for once again, what's the incentive consider the source and. |
| 01:21:40.72 | mikebledsoe | E ire. |
| 01:21:53.76 | Max Shank | If there is 1 more message I would send out to our listeners. It's um, like you you don't know either to like tell people what they should say and shouldn't be able to say and you might feel really dumb later I I sure have. |
| 01:22:04.79 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:22:12.30 | Max Shank | Sure have I've told people things that I've found later to be completely wrong and I said them with such confidence that they believed me. |
| 01:22:16.70 | mikebledsoe | Ah, ah, same same Another example that I I saw thing was this morning or or yesterday which was ah and I forget exactly who it is someone who's really well known they have wikipedia has a page on them. And they got a bunch of happy Birthday texts the other day. Ah because wikipedia got their birthday wrong and so a lot of you know, a lot of people think wikipedia is is you know 1 of the best sources of information because they work off donation which. I trust donation based organizations for information more than I am sponsored. However, they may be getting large donations that are sponsorships from people for 1 um, but also it's it's not infallible right? Ah wikipedia. Is is ah you know they've censored a bit and are ah in charge of shadow banning and things like that because most of the information on wikipedia is is ah created by the users. So similar to social media. But even. Even they get it wrong even though that's something that they would probably not intentionally try to get wrong. But even even that was wrong. |
| 01:23:33.85 | Max Shank | Yeah, the path to hell is paved with good intentions and if you don't speak up. You'll be led like a lamb to slaughter I Thought that was a George Washington quote turns out that's actually biblical. |
| 01:23:44.28 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and ah, 1 the other. |
| 01:23:52.82 | mikebledsoe | Ah, now. |
| 01:23:53.60 | Max Shank | You know that it was way before it but see that's just the thing for a year literally until this morning I thought that was a george washington quote about about free speech but it actually is from from roughly 2000 years ago |
| 01:23:59.58 | mikebledsoe | O. |
| 01:24:08.73 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 01:24:10.49 | Max Shank | And just for like rules of engagement. That's all we have folks, we can talk it out or we can fight it out that's amendment 1 amendment 2 That's that's the way we can sort out our differences so we can sort them out with language or we can sort them out. |
| 01:24:22.79 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, have you. |
| 01:24:29.27 | Max Shank | With so words or Swords basically. |
| 01:24:31.34 | mikebledsoe | That's an interesting point. You know I've always thought you know the second amendment is there in case, the first amendment doesn't work out because are the words of ah Dave chappelle but the in while I was encouraging black people to go buy guns. Um. |
| 01:24:35.82 | Max Shank | Per her. |
| 01:24:48.20 | mikebledsoe | But what was I saying oh yeah, it's like if you take away Speech people will resort to violence because people do want to be able to express themselves and if you say I'm going to limit your ability to express yourself verbally It's only Goingnna heighten. Ah, and in 1 direction. There's only 1 direction to go from there. Ah. |
| 01:25:07.35 | Max Shank | Do you think you'll talk more with a mask on or less with a mask on what no way same Huh What? I mean that was like in didn't they like usually um. |
| 01:25:11.93 | mikebledsoe | Oh less. Yeah. Ah, oh man. |
| 01:25:26.82 | mikebledsoe | I don't know yeah up I ah but when they first so when I was in California last summer |
| 01:25:27.50 | Max Shank | Gag the slaves like that I think it's pretty important. You don't want them to like talk back. You don't want them getting any ideas about getting ideas. What I tell you about having ideas Year. |
| 01:25:45.50 | mikebledsoe | And I first sat down started going back to restaurants. Yeah, after you know I think we were like Month 3 of the pandemic I started going back to restaurants and you know we wear a mask into the restaurant and then we sit down and we can take it off and the servers are wearing masks and it took me months. To stop feeling weird about me not wearing a mask and a server's wearing masks because my experience in that environment was that I was better than them I was having this experience of like I don't have to wear my mask you're but you're serving me, you're my servant and you you better fucking wear your mask and so like. |
| 01:26:16.48 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 01:26:21.74 | mikebledsoe | It in it and it went from like this like I usually engage with my server and we joke around and we're having a good time. That's usually how I do things and then when the mask came on that that went away like my I just kind of like they became a robot. It became this faceless person who is there just you know. |
| 01:26:27.72 | Max Shank | Ah, fred. |
| 01:26:33.42 | Max Shank | That. |
| 01:26:41.73 | mikebledsoe | But my fucking food. So ah, um, wouldn say my attitude changed that way but I actually there was like ah I had an experience of guilt of just sitting there and then having that experience of separation and thinking I'm better I wasn't actually thinking I'm better than them. But I'm like I can see how this turns into that. |
| 01:26:42.39 | Max Shank | Well and all of that was based. |
| 01:26:58.43 | Max Shank | Well and it's funny because this whole premise was that it would be better but there was no proof that that was the case and so that actually brings me to a really important. Ah simple truth. Which is the way to determine if something is true is a true Premise. So in math. It would be like the assumption and a valid thought process so you have 2 pillars essentially so you can have a true premise. And an invalid thought process or you can have a false premise and a valid thought process which is both of those would still be wrong and so this whole idea that it will be and once again, you know like I'm not trying to say I know any different but all of the. |
| 01:27:39.95 | mikebledsoe | It is. |
| 01:27:54.62 | Max Shank | All of the weird rules that have come about like you you wear your mask to trot across the restaurant and then you sit down none of those are based on any kind of real valid thought process. Or a true premise. They just don't make sense. They're just very confusing and I'm sure part of that look I'm not trying to say they're like really sinister things at Bay here. But the reality is if someone has power. They only want more of it. They never want less of it. So. |
| 01:28:27.59 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:28:29.73 | Max Shank | So So it's just it's so tricky because I'm even in our talk about this I'm tiptoeing around what I might actually fully think is true partially because I'm not so confident in it myself. And partially because I want people to absorb and receive the overarching message rather than just immediately say like I'm a witch and I must be burned at the stake because if you say something that makes a person I mean. |
| 01:29:00.73 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:29:07.71 | Max Shank | Honestly, um, in england can I bum a fag means can I have a cigarette please. But if you say it here it means something totally different and there are some people listening to this maybe who heard the word fag and were just like oh my god that Max. I will never listen to another thing he says again and I feel sorry about that sometimes because I think there's a lot of stuff that you and I say that is extremely valuable basically magic for your body and mind and helping you. Find the real treasures in life like love and expression and creation and avoiding the traps like comparison and envy and greed and all these different things so that's that's part of why I self censor is because I do want to make sure that. Good stuff. Reaches people who might not be in the same place we're at yet where they recognize that you know sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me and I think that should be ah like the whole theme of this discussion. |
| 01:30:19.86 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, ah I like you were saying about like I like to approach the conversation where I at least pretend that there. It's not a sinister person like you know bill gates. |
| 01:30:23.24 | Max Shank | amendment 1 amendment 2 |
| 01:30:37.28 | mikebledsoe | You know, a lot of people want to paint him as this evil person who's you know, basically like a a comic book criminal or whatever and I think that that's a great way to lose people if you say oh,, there's this the illuminati is coming into people go. Okay, he's fucking crazy. Because I don't know if that's true or not like there's There's a lot of things that make me think there are evil Ah, there's an evil Axis of power that that is you know, creating the scenarios but I don't actually know that to be True. It would be an assumption that could be false So I don't like the lead with that and it's I think that. |
| 01:31:07.13 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 01:31:16.23 | mikebledsoe | You're going to get a lot more people to listen you go look their intentions are good if you just say look I believe everybody's intention is good. You know you can't not for dead people not not those are just dead people. But. |
| 01:31:23.72 | Max Shank | Hitler had good intentions. He was trying to end suffering. He was trying to unite people by the way I don't like hitler. No fan. Great speaker though. |
| 01:31:35.98 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, not a fan. Ah but yeah, incredible. But it you know are people really really sinister why it's like when I talk about Hitler I go I go man he was ah a really great leader and people were like appalled by that and go well. How many does do you have more followers than him are he had the most he had a shitload of followers. He's a leader if if you're being Followed. You're a good leader. Are you a moral leader? No but he was good at the leadership thing. Ah anyways I like to say I like to say like ah. I try to stay away from talking about yeah trend setter but just got canceled ah but is it but I like you know like I like to approach these arguments from the conversation of look. Um. |
| 01:32:12.64 | Max Shank | Also a very sharp dresser. |
| 01:32:32.44 | mikebledsoe | I Believe their intentions are good even with good intentions. Let's look at the results and and that that takes away this like thing where people a lot of times want to they associate with some ah leader they associate their own identity with this leader and if you talk shit about the leader now you're talking shit about them. And people shut down in that conversation. So when I get in that conversation I go look you know you know Joe biden's a really good guy. He's doing his best job and you know there's nobody. You know, no shadow monster behind him pulling the strings. He really is an autonomous human being and. You know? Ah, but but you know he's kind of fucking up. They go oh well, you know what? yeah I believe he's a good guy and he's trying really hard. But yeah, he did fuck up Afghanistan's like okay, cool. We can agree on that. But if I talk about him being evil they completely shut down never hear anything I say and true dot and. |
| 01:33:22.61 | Max Shank | The path to hell is paved with good intentions. |
| 01:33:28.94 | mikebledsoe | Um, and people also tend to project their own intention on who they follow like I have good intentions and I like that guy so he probably has the same intentions that I do ah and and so this goes back to you know is it true or is it useful. So. |
| 01:33:39.54 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 01:33:47.81 | mikebledsoe | It may be true, but there's a lot of things we may we may filter ourselves on this show and even though it may sound like we don't We may filter ourselves on this show but that's because we are filtering ourselves in a way that we're attempting to be useful. We We want the conversation to be useful and true at the same time which means that we're not going to just divulge everything we think because we're smart enough to know that not all of our thoughts are true and we would. It's much better to have a conversation where I hope I cause max to think more. Critically I know that I have had to think more critically during the show and I I Hope that anyone who's listening has has thought more critically as a result of this and will view the world through a lens which empowers them more to to. Make better decisions for themselves which in turn makes better decisions for humanity as a whole. |
| 01:34:47.39 | Max Shank | Yeah, we want you guys to be more free, not less and you know part of what I do is I help people abandon their goals for better ones. You know I realize that ah I often don't help people achieve their goals. |
| 01:34:56.51 | mikebledsoe | A I like that. |
| 01:35:04.92 | Max Shank | Ah, usually talk with them until they come up with better ones. No no, no, no, it's a great. It's a great thing. It's It's the best thing for you. It definitely it definitely sounds bad I'm I'm good. Ah. |
| 01:35:07.87 | mikebledsoe | Don't don't don't tell people that you're gonna lose you're gonna lose clients. Ah I do I do I do the same thing. Yeah, you got to trick them. You got to trick and and go like I can help you reach your goal and then they start working with you and then you. |
| 01:35:22.85 | Max Shank | Um, I'm gonna help you by convincing you to give up your dreams. No, it's because they're secondhand not necessarily. They're stupid. It's just you haven't really thought about like and then and then what happens I mean I know I didn't. |
| 01:35:23.75 | mikebledsoe | Help them change your goals. |
| 01:35:28.97 | mikebledsoe | Um, your dreams are stupid. Well they don't Yeah, they don't They're not their goals right. |
| 01:35:42.68 | Max Shank | But like the reality is most of the things that we pursue are just so we create this illusion that we hope other people will like and. |
| 01:35:49.73 | mikebledsoe | Well I think like most men they their goals are are set up to impress their dad until their dad's not around anymore that was true for me. Yeah yeah, well my dad got ladies I figure I can press my dad you know. |
| 01:35:56.38 | Max Shank | I Thought it was too to impress a lady Also right. What if your dad doesn't get ladies though, Then What do you do. |
| 01:36:06.84 | mikebledsoe | I Don't know man I don't know what that experience is like so um. |
| 01:36:11.83 | Max Shank | Um, I think I think ah, it's important like that's just there are so many burdens that people carry and I know we could just keep going on about this all freaking day. But the the burdens of trying to impress upon other people. Or trying to impress other people is quite heavy. So if you can alleviate yourselves of the burden of like trying to know what's going on like you can't really know what's going on all the way through that's why this whole idea of like. |
| 01:36:33.25 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:36:48.18 | Max Shank | Trust science is so ridiculous because science is all about verification trusting the news. You shouldn't trust them either but look the reality is you don't have to what you can do instead is you can create value and share it with people who are interested. In reciprocating for that value you you don't even have to get involved in this Stuff you know that's why this whole principle-based thing that we're talking about is I think so crazy valuable because you you don't try to be an alpha. You just be an omega which is like the very bottom but it's also there's there's no, um, there's no like pressure there. You don't feel like you have to be a certain way. You just focus on. Making the best art that you can or creating the best value that you can or just doing your job and then being able to let go of that thing and I think that's going to give you a better result than getting stuck in like what is essentially name calling. |
| 01:37:56.60 | mikebledsoe | Ah, well speaking of name calling there's there's 1 more couple more things I want to cover before we go and just because I want to cover in this show and I I have ah I have a hard stop in ten minutes but um you know another way, another form of censorship is changing definition which also. |
| 01:38:04.89 | Max Shank | Um, laid on me I can go all day. |
| 01:38:15.61 | mikebledsoe | Um, which also like falls in the same category with labeling changing the labels of things and or and and saying ah yeah, it. It just takes me down the path of of the book nineteen eighty four. |
| 01:38:22.19 | Max Shank | Are. |
| 01:38:33.55 | Max Shank | That's what I was thinking to. |
| 01:38:34.77 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, because they they reduce the amount of words that are being used which we're witnessing in our in our society right now there's less lots of collapse distinctions which causes confusion which causes conflict when anytime there's confusion. There's conflict or ah. |
| 01:38:41.82 | Max Shank | That's collapse distinction at its finest right. |
| 01:38:53.80 | mikebledsoe | There's a lack of definition where we're max and are using the same word, but it means different things to each 1 of us and so that creates conflict um and any time there's conflict. It's easy to control people who are in conflict because they're focused on something that's not the person controlling. |
| 01:39:04.62 | Max Shank | And. Right? They hate They hate the other guy with the different colored t-shirt instead of the kink. |
| 01:39:11.26 | mikebledsoe | Um, um, yeah, and so this is this is why like? ah I don't know exactly why other people get a little flustered with the pronoun conversation but this is a good example of the labels and. And changing of definitions is there was a was a news I think it was a health line article that went up recently that basically said can men someone ask a question like can men get pregnant and the response was well first we have to look at the definition of a man. You know there's a lot of transgender and is like this is ridiculous. This is. |
| 01:39:50.72 | Max Shank | Whoa Whoa Whoa I Think that's pretty hateful I think this conversation is so important I will not rest until we know what to call a man look I Know there's a lot of coercion and sex trafficking and just. Generalfuckery going on. But I think we should re-examine What the word man means that is the most important thing. |
| 01:40:16.58 | mikebledsoe | Ah, case in point. very good. very good thank you for that I think that's all we gotta say about that but beware of changing definitions and then when things are labeled up in 1980 four a lot of things that they say it's this. It's actually that um I picked up a book on. |
| 01:40:19.88 | Max Shank | That's fucking retarded. |
| 01:40:35.79 | mikebledsoe | Anti-racism 1 day at the health food store had to thumb through it was 1 of the most racist things I had ever seen and so when you got you gotta to be Careful. You gotta you gotta step back. Take a breath look at these things from ah ah. Try to be objective when looking at these situations and are are we promoting segregation or we promoting integration and the final note I want to leave on I'm gonna let max close us up but all right I'll let you go with anti-racism and then and then I'll. |
| 01:41:05.10 | Max Shank | I Want to say something about the the anti-racism. Just no, just real quick. It's real quick for every force. There's an equal and opposite Force War on drugs Total Disaster War on terror total disaster. |
| 01:41:13.17 | mikebledsoe | Will these some final words correct. |
| 01:41:22.70 | Max Shank | No, nothing is more nothing is brought more terror to the people of America than the american media the whole idea of being anti-racist is of course going to be racist because anytime you fight against 1 thing you're you're getting pushback from the other side. That's what I want to say so war on drugs war on terror. |
| 01:41:37.19 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, so even if the intention is less racism being anti-racism being anti-racist is likely to create more racism. |
| 01:41:41.48 | Max Shank | On racism. |
| 01:41:48.15 | Max Shank | You could only be in favor of equal opportunity. Everything else would be wrong I think. |
| 01:41:54.91 | mikebledsoe | I agree. Ah, final words from me look I when I look at censorship I really see a robbery of wisdom and what I mean by that is that. The only way that we accumulate Wisdom is to to test knowledge against reality to to put it into play and to get the result back and anytime anyone's controlling the knowledge that we can have access to they're controlling our ability to develop wisdom and so. What we're really sitting in right now is a wisdom crisis and it's the the answer to that is taking responsibility for the information you take in and being able to ah put it through the filter and ask good questions and. And try to be objective about what's going on and to stay away from some of these because you say rhetorical fallacies or if you're experiencing an emotional if you're having a ah strong emotional experience in your body when you hear things is being with that emotional experience. Recognizing as such and still being able to hear the information coming in these are these are ways in which you can take in better information and ah practice your own wisdom and develop your own wisdom. |
| 01:43:19.20 | Max Shank | Yeah I would say who is to gain from what you're hearing that's number 1 consider the source number 2 and then just as an aside. Censorship may be done with good intentions. But the result is never positive and if you support censorship then that is just your ego transplanting into the ego of some authority. And you are essentially giving him your power and yeah, maybe her? Yeah guess ladies are pretty evil too. |
| 01:43:57.60 | mikebledsoe | Or her or her well I think Hillary clinton's behind you know Biden if she's actually in control now I'm just kidding. Ah. |
| 01:44:08.64 | Max Shank | Really I mean they both. They both seem so mentally sound. Ah I love how all all of the like smartest people in the in business are like ah. You know 30 to forty mostly and we are only choosing from like fucking 80 year olds for who runs the country I don't think they could even get a driver's license. Ah, but anyway the the whole idea is supporting. Censorship is really just supporting. Ah, unilateral authoritarianism so you are essentially um, putting everybody at the mercy of the few and without free speech. We will be led like lamb's to slaughter. So I think there's a reason. It's the first amendment there's reason it's the most important thing you know the main difference between a pig and a man is the fact that we can talk and we can only resolve our differences with talking or with violence physical violence real violence and I think. It behooves everybody to become adept in both verbal ah dialogue as well as physical violence. |
| 01:45:31.38 | mikebledsoe | Ah, you sound like you're a a greek philosopher or something good shit match. Ah, where can people find you if they go looking. |
| 01:45:42.45 | Max Shank | If you Google me I'm pretty much everywhere but maxshank dot com. |
| 01:45:48.22 | mikebledsoe | Dope and you can find me on Instagram at my underscore blitzo feel bad just saying that I need ah I need a more conci I am working on my substack. |
| 01:45:55.80 | Max Shank | I hear I hear it kills you on the inside when you say underscore every week I think I've thought about that so many times mike underscore blood. So just like fucking kill me. |
| 01:46:07.73 | mikebledsoe | I Mean you have to hit the keyboard change button twice just to get there all y'all? Yeah so hard. All right. Love you to later. |
| 01:46:14.70 | Max Shank | That's 2 keystrokes. Love you brother. Love you guys. Bye. |
| 00:00.83 | mikebledsoe | Today we're talking about language. Some people may say that's boring and the reason and and ah I won't name the show language probably for that reason. Well, we'll say something clever on this episode between max and myself. And and then name it that but we wanted to really talk about it because we found it to be a very important subject for us to focus on I know for myself. It's helped me to ah. Not only communicate better with other people I think most people go oh you're better at language you could probably communicate better and in ah in an effective way that other people will will hear what you have to say in the way you want it to be received but also just for myself just for. Deliberately using language to reduce the own confusion I have in my own mind to work things out to become more certain about ah how I am approaching things and about what's going on in the world and I think anyone who does not put their attention into language. Um. Is going to be extremely limited in their ability ability to be productive and effective in the world today. So I always think about language is a major component in the expansion of consciousness and if someone's interested in that and they leave that part out then there are. Ah, they're missing out on on a huge huge piece Max. What? what got you into focusing in on language and going. Wow this is something important to pay attention to. |
| 01:45.43 | Max Shank | It's the only tool we have for interaction other than physical touch which can be violent or nonviolent or body language. So everything. We communicate to ourselves and 1 another is done with this framework of language you have the deeper stuff which is ah feelings which don't necessarily need language to exist like you can be afraid or you can be aroused or you could be a little bit of both. For example. Um, I feel like the way that we are taught language is probably the worst way possible. So it almost sets you up for failure and you know I've always wanted to get as powerful as possible. And you realize at least I realized I was spending like hours and hours and hours in the gym and in a fighting gym doing kickboxing and Moai and kravmiga and all this stuff and you know you realize like that's not very practical like the. The likelihood of a violent interaction is really low Plus if you really want want to be good at that. You should just get a a weapon and get really good with that and then take it a step further. It's like ah some guy will just write a check and like win. Everything. |
| 02:59.86 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, as. |
| 03:16.10 | Max Shank | Like if you're able to communicate really well and put deals together and organize a group of people toward the same goal. That's where that pen is mightier than the sword comes from. So yeah, exactly So the the whole ah premise of getting. |
| 03:24.10 | mikebledsoe | You can just hire somebody to beat somebody up, you know at that point. |
| 03:35.47 | Max Shank | Physical power is like ridiculous ninety nine percent of the time now I do think it's very worthwhile to cultivate physical strength and mental strength can stem from physical challenge like if you carry a pack up a mountain. It's going to be. Physically challenging but that physical challenge is going to give you a huge mental challenge as well. Um, with communication There's only 1 goal really which is to transmit the message you intend. And that's I think the first place that people get gummed up is they don't even know what they're trying to communicate and you have to consider the audience so there needs to be just like a computer There's a sender and a receiver and it has to be. Um, understandable and in order for a human being to understand it has to be communicated to them in a way that resonates with them has to be communicated in a language that they clearly understand and you can't have too many bits. In a short amount of time. So like for example, when you download something off the internet. There's a download rate essentially and you can't go beyond that because the computer will start to miss things like you can't give too many bits. Per unit of time and so if I tell you hey mike remember this sequence of numbers. It's a 4 7 q l 1 2 3 8 11 b 1217 you're going to be like I don't know what the heck you're talking about now. |
| 05:23.80 | mikebledsoe | She. |
| 05:26.10 | Max Shank | If I stretch that over a much longer set of communication I can probably get you to remember all those things especially if I tell it to you in a story but by and law which is why? Ah so many stories were just. Told they weren't even written so we can go like way back like the way before we had written language we had spoken language so you have to be really clear on what you're trying to communicate and you can't give too many bits. Otherwise it gets lost So that's. I think 1 of the big things I've noticed both professionally and personally is people try to say too much and their core message gets lost right. |
| 06:14.83 | mikebledsoe | Right? Well I think um, 1 of the key things that you said there is that I'm not going to repeat you verbatim. But basically what I heard was people don't people aren't considering. The result of their communication before they communicate or while they're communicating my experience is that most people are trying to satisfy a feeling if I when I speak I Want to feel a certain way. |
| 06:37.85 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 06:51.73 | mikebledsoe | And it might be ah exactly the yeah, the feeling the the desire to be heard and understood is ah is a very common 1 when we study sales and marketing we go. Oh if you can just make the customer feel heard and understood. |
| 06:52.14 | Max Shank | Like a desire to be heard kind of thing. |
| 07:08.27 | Max Shank | Right? totally. |
| 07:09.83 | mikebledsoe | They'll buy almost anything from you. Even if you know as long as they if you people feel hurt and understood so infrequently that if when it happens it's a standout experience and there they they then. |
| 07:23.37 | Max Shank | And that's. |
| 07:28.69 | mikebledsoe | Get into this place where they know like and you know they like and trust you at least in that in that situation but 1 1 of the things I've come to ah realize is so many people are communicating for to solve for short term insecurities. They don't understand the long-term consequences of their communication most of which is there just communicating things that are like you were saying confusing people are confused by it and ah 1 of the ways that I that I have improved. My ability to communicate is really thinking. What is what is the result I'm trying to achieve with this information and the the more knowledge I've accumulated the the less knowledge I tend to lay out for someone to take on at a time. Spread it out as you were saying you know I could give you everything that you need to know in a weekend to to run your business effectively. But your ability to grok that and then put it into practice. It's just it's too much too Fast. It's not. Not going to get the desired result. |
| 08:43.34 | Max Shank | Yeah, So if you're communicating for self-gratification instead of conversion I think it's a really big mistake and I think it shows a lot of insecurity people tend to use a lot of 10 dollars Words. Or twenty dollars words it doesn't matter how much the words are but complicated words that people don't really understand as well and the more confident you are the less you feel a need to talk just to talk. And the less you feel a need to fill up the gaps in silence because you're like oh I'm I'm afraid the other person will start talking and then I'll lose my turn. So. |
| 09:25.75 | mikebledsoe | I used to do that I used to I would like I would throw a lot of ums in there. So I could stretch out what I was saying so no 1 could interrupt me I was signaling. Oh don't don't speak because I still have something to say. |
| 09:40.71 | Max Shank | And if you're smart It doesn't come out as an um, it's just another bit. You may not say um or Hm or and ah ah you it may just be I start talking about something else. So I keep the the conch shell right? the. |
| 09:44.70 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 09:59.40 | Max Shank | The the talking stick. Ah, if you don't have a ah goal. It's fine. You know you don't want to like over analyze your whole life like I do in every word you say. But if you're just having um, if. You're communicating with someone. There should be a goal like I have a little checklist actually I can pop through real quick. So um, step 1 is who are you sending this to which is your audience step 2 is what do you want them to change or do which is the call to action. Ah, why should they which would be the benefits plus the supporting Features. What are the consequences. So the heaven or hell how will you inspire hope which are stories and steps make it feel easy and possible and how much. Time effort and cost will it take so what is the cost of what they're doing and when you realize that basically every bit of communication is you're you're trying to get someone to take a specific action at least when you start getting into ah writing and sales. Which is persuasion relationships are the same thing like I think you should take out the trash and I will do this instead and there are all kinds of ways that you can break it down. But if you don't know what you're trying to achieve at the very outset then it's it's fun. It's a conversation. It's a stream of consciousness boom boom boom back and Forth. There doesn't have to be a clear outcome involved. But I think that's where writing gives you a lot of clarity because you start structuring your ideas with. Supporting arguments. You know you have a premise like I think you should exercise in the morning for x y and z and here's the benefits that you get from it and you realize that you can't put. Too many bits in there and it forces you to consolidate your ideas into something that is digestible. |
| 12:08.98 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and you said you said maybe you should not do what I've done which is put your your communication and and thoughts through constant analysis. But I found a lot of successful people. They may not be doing. Putting their thoughts through constant analysis currently or or putting a lot of attention into it. But I think going through a period of time where that happens ah a little a little thing that I've done and and I've challenged other people to do is to. Get rid of words in your vocabulary for a period of time and a word that gets Overused. So if you're using over usinging a word a word that I I think I still overuse. But I've got a lot better which is the word like. Which is extremely common for our generation. There's a lot of likes and you cut that 1 word out and you go well, that word's useful, but then you start when you cut it Out. You realize the majority of the use of that word that I I use it for is not Useful. It's wasted space. |
| 13:23.37 | Max Shank | It's filler. It's filler. |
| 13:24.36 | mikebledsoe | It's filler and and it can be confused if any filler creates more confusion by the way. Ah, and yeah, and so by removing that sometimes when it is useful I then have to go search for another word. And it's in its place. So 1 of the ways that I I train myself is I put a rubber band around my wrist and if I if the word slips through my lips I take a little band and I snap it on my Wrist. So I give myself a little little feedback. |
| 13:49.14 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 14:01.70 | Max Shank | Do you worry that? um, you'll have to eventually upgrade to a shot collar just to get the same sensation. |
| 14:01.39 | mikebledsoe | On that. Ah. |
| 14:07.59 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, I've thought about that I actually was thinking about taking 1 of those shot collars and just putting it on my my nether regions in that just to really you know drive the point home now. How far does it go? ah. |
| 14:14.21 | Max Shank | Oh wow. |
| 14:20.32 | Max Shank | It um, it only goes 1 way typically. |
| 14:24.50 | mikebledsoe | Ah, well the the rubber band The rubber band is good because I've also been in I've been on stage before and snap my wrist. Ah and people go you know and I point out this is what I'm doing so it it becomes a social thing too is. |
| 14:37.69 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 14:41.77 | mikebledsoe | Oh I'm I'm showing everybody that I'm I'm making this mistake it. It brings it. It brings more of like a social awareness say I just said it a social awareness around what's going on and which brings more attention to it which causes me to be better about it. |
| 14:53.22 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 15:01.63 | mikebledsoe | So. |
| 15:02.50 | Max Shank | What's also fascinating is that when you appear more fallible people like you more like the thing that people hate most is the perfect guy. So interestingly enough so if you use. |
| 15:05.59 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 15:18.30 | Max Shank | Language like the common man and you go and um, you know what is that word? Oh yeah house like what's a you, you just? um, kind of develop that persuasion through affect. Rather than just having the simplest and most direct message possible because usually you are talking about persuasion of some kind you're persuading them to buy to try or to cry or to laugh or something like that. There's ah, there's a goal there. |
| 15:48.94 | mikebledsoe | Well people really value your intent I think a lot of people value intention over results. So even if you are fallible and you're you're going at least I'm trying people go oh you know, give you a little golf clap. |
| 15:51.36 | Max Shank | And just having. |
| 16:04.25 | Max Shank | Well whatever they believe your intention is right? So I think for your own psychological organization. You want to have the most clarity possible. |
| 16:08.26 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 16:21.64 | Max Shank | Like essentially you want to have a triangle your triangle describes the main point and then each point of the triangle is the 3 like sub points of that. So. There's ah, a really solid clear precise structure to everything you're saying. But just communicating something in the simplest way possible isn't necessarily the most persuasive using stories and analogies that really make you feel certain things can be really beneficial even though they might seem. Superfluous or unnecessary like that word superfluous is a fun word to say but the fact that it means unnecessary and it's unnecessarily complicated is really hilarious. |
| 17:21.77 | Max Shank | These long pauses are really good for podcasting. You told me. |
| 17:24.77 | mikebledsoe | I did but then zencastr put this this little thing in the production where it cuts out anything over 1 point, 2 seconds it cuts it down in 1 point, 2 seconds. So it makes makes the pauses actually. Okay. |
| 17:38.90 | Max Shank | Whoa. So the folks at home won't get the full experience of that awkward pause. |
| 17:46.96 | mikebledsoe | Ah, 1 thing I find very interesting is when I when I started getting hip to the power of language I ah was really disgusted At. You know, maybe people aren't doing it on purpose. Maybe they are who knows yeah I was I was disgusted with well I stay disgusted about this. So. It's not like it's not as if this was a new feeling about this but education the the systematic government run. |
| 18:05.94 | Max Shank | It's a really strong emotion. |
| 18:22.50 | mikebledsoe | Education system really focuses on spelling things correctly and grammar. But what I notice is there's a ah lack of focus on definition of certain words. |
| 18:29.41 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 18:41.90 | mikebledsoe | Ah, it's more about can we make it look pretty or are we following the rules of of ah you know don't put this word in front of this word and don't put this word at the end of the sentence and while completely leaving Out. You know how words shape our thoughts which shape our mind and and which words are helpful and which words won't be might be harmful and if you put them. You know if you follow this word with this other word. What's that doing to your mind and you know it. That hits me along with you know we teach algebra which no 1 hardly ever uses once they get out of high school. But no 1 knows how to balance their books. No 1 understands money the thing that they're constantly surrounded by so my my experience of language in regard to education is similar to that. |
| 19:23.74 | Max Shank | So so. |
| 19:36.71 | mikebledsoe | Mathematics and that ah you learn how to jump through all these hoops for the purpose of getting a good grade. But how are these things impacting your your life and being successful and so most of what I learned I was a very like reading and writing was. Was what I did. That was my best subjects and math was you know a little bit tougher for me but I look at all that and I go as as much as I learned about reading and writing and I was gotten these amazing grades. |
| 19:57.70 | Max Shank | So. |
| 20:13.53 | mikebledsoe | It wasn't until I was in my thirty s that I really started learning language in a way that was actually helpful for me. It's not complicated. |
| 20:20.37 | Max Shank | And it's not complicated. Good good communication either. I think what you said at the beginning about understanding how language shapes thought and that's the truth is language shapes thought. And of course your thought shapes the language that you use so it's a feedback loop but what I tell people is that everything about you that is not an animal is laid out with language. So every. Concept above your instincts is language driven. What is okay to do and what is not okay to do what is good to do what is bad that whole ah knowledge of good and evil thing that's all that's all language. That's it's basically. Anti-instinual pretty much so everything that we do that is not just pure animal instinct is laid on a foundation of language so you have to be really or you don't have to be but it's good to be very considerate of what language. You accept I mean we've talked about it I think in a past podcast even the concept of slavery is heavily based on the definition like that is a possibility so every every like thing we have and everything we have in place. Is laid out using words. It's conditional phrases if this then this every law is there's no such thing as ah laws. It's more crimes are defined. And punishments are also defined and sometimes they're left up to the discretion of the judge or something like that. But usually we define a crime we define a punishment we define a contest and we define a prize for that contest but everything. Outside of your base instincts is language so getting clear on how you would like to be and realizing that it's all just your perception that colors the world outside of instinct so you have instinct and then you have your. Individual perception. That's a that's a huge revel is revelation. That's enough to make anyone go crazy. Basically. |
| 22:54.44 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, and and there's language shaping thoughts. So first I think most people think about language and they think about communication and but the the shaping of thoughts and really. Going inwards and go what is the language of my mind. How is the language of my mind playing out when I sit quietly when I say quietly and I notice oh these are not words that are coming out of my mouth but these are words that are running through the mind. What is. |
| 23:28.44 | Max Shank | Right? what. |
| 23:32.30 | mikebledsoe | How is that shaping my perception of this moment. What is what feelings? What feelings are associated with those words those words create a feeling um and and being curious about that and anyone who starts diving into how language shapes their thoughts. |
| 23:35.27 | Max Shank | Totally. |
| 23:51.85 | mikebledsoe | And you start making small tweaks. Oh I'm going to remove this I'm going to add this a game we call Play is with our coaching is the 1 word game is bring up a a common thought that comes up in your mind in this situation Cool What if we just changed 1 word. And we have them write out the thought right now write it out with 1 word change does that change how you feel and almost every time someone goes. Yeah I feel different because I took the not out of that is it accurate. Yes, or no, maybe yes, maybe no okay. |
| 24:12.43 | Max Shank | And. |
| 24:31.27 | mikebledsoe | What's the next word we would have to change to make this a more accurate statement. So what we do is we if if I I think a mistake that happens with in coaching that I see a lot of times as people go, you're doing it like this. Why don't you just try it like this and it's like and it's as if you changed 10 words of their. |
| 24:33.35 | Max Shank | Have. |
| 24:50.36 | mikebledsoe | Thoughts all at once going back to what you were saying before giving them bits giving them small bits so large and so shaping the mind 1 word at a time I'm going to use a piece of sandpaper to get us there instead of an axe and. |
| 25:06.49 | Max Shank | Like challenge change to ah but opportunity. For example, that's ah, that's a good 1 Yeah feels different. |
| 25:08.33 | mikebledsoe | Ah, exact. Yeah, exactly. So yup, that feels different when you say and then all of a sudden the ability to see opportunity opens up whereas challenges that word tends to focus possibility and. And just vision so really getting in the practice of recognizing how these thoughts shape how we think which shape how we perceive the world and and what our options may be and then we have language outside of ourselves which was I think about the thought of culture. |
| 25:47.24 | Max Shank | Spot Then what. |
| 25:48.11 | mikebledsoe | So all these concepts that I've used to look inwards in my own ability and then you know communicating with people who are closest to me in relationship. But then I start looking at the thought of culture. What are the what are the memes that come and. Not the memes you see on Instagram I mean those those do qualify those are a a version of these memes but a meme is a is it is a snippet of narrative. There's a meme in our culture of this and that and this yeah. |
| 26:06.91 | Max Shank | 1 |
| 26:17.81 | Max Shank | Like sorry tourette's sorry to write oh sorry? Sorry oh I'm sorry I'm sorry oh my god Jesus like is everyone really so sorry, all the time I used to do the same thing I have now gone. |
| 26:24.21 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah, maybe. |
| 26:37.81 | Max Shank | Completely the other way where I'm really cautious anytime I do say that because I'm not sorry like really. |
| 26:45.61 | mikebledsoe | No well I had someone recently is that I don't mean to cut you off, but and then and then just start kept talking I go I stopped him and I said yes you did and they go and there's a ah group of people in they go. |
| 26:55.89 | Max Shank | No yeah. |
| 27:04.76 | mikebledsoe | I Did what you meant to cut me off and they go and they kind of go. Ah, you said that and then you just kept on talking and they go oh shit I go I Go don't feel bad about it I'm just bringing this to your awareness you can cut I cut people off all the time but I don't tell people I don't. |
| 27:09.95 | Max Shank | Right? You know. |
| 27:20.71 | Max Shank | Um, right. |
| 27:23.95 | mikebledsoe | Started off by saying don't mean to cut you off cause like it's bullshit. |
| 27:28.76 | Max Shank | I'm not sexist but ladies are way better at cooking. |
| 27:33.39 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, so so I start thinking about the thoughts of culture. Ah you know in the last year and a half it's been very. It's been on loudspeaker on social media. The the memes that the Instagram memes are are somewhat like those are cultural memes as well. |
| 27:39.53 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 27:50.33 | Max Shank | No doubt. |
| 27:51.74 | mikebledsoe | Ah, and I think that if we when we go down to the core of culture. We actually do find law and those are the words that are laid out. They're not. It's not really law I Hate calling it law. It's it's policy So a group of people got together. |
| 28:08.29 | Max Shank | Crime and punishment. |
| 28:11.37 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the kind of punishment conversation. You're having they they create a policy and you know they argue about which words we should use and what order and and we put them on this piece of paper and then and then we'll convince these policy enforcers that will tell you that they're here to protect and serve. But. |
| 28:19.89 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 28:31.28 | mikebledsoe | Really their job is to enforce policy and what you end up with is people don't really I don't think they actually recognize how important how our law is the foundation of culture and. |
| 28:46.63 | Max Shank | Ah, it's weaponized language. |
| 28:50.92 | mikebledsoe | Exactly I like that it's policy slash Weaponized language. |
| 28:55.62 | Max Shank | I Mean there's nothing.. There's nothing more ah like sneaky and coercive than drumming up these ah rules with punishments attached. In a language that the average person can't understand and when you think about how people have tried to control each other it really did go from the stick to the pen. You know the big guy with a big stick was like ah so like suppose I'm. Like a 200 and fifty pound monster with a club and you're just whatever your size is what are you like 1 sixty or something. Okay, so so suppose I'm like a yeah suppose I'm like a viking monster and I'm like hey there Mike ah I was just thinking I would I would take your house and your wife. |
| 29:38.28 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, 5 8 1 sixty not a big guy. |
| 29:51.87 | Max Shank | And ah and if you're not cool with that I'll I'll hit you with this stick until you're dead and for a long time that was how it worked basically. But then 1 day you were very clever and you were like hey hey hey whoa you don't want to do that because then you'll burn in hell forever. |
| 29:58.25 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 30:10.38 | Max Shank | I Mean you've heard about fire right? It's really hot burns it hurts and plus if you if you don't kill and murder then you go to heaven which is the it's the best I mean what? what do you like. |
| 30:13.90 | mikebledsoe | Ah, well this is this is what the catholic. |
| 30:21.27 | mikebledsoe | Well, this is how the Catholic church got a hold of the Knights The Knights were an unruly crew. So the. |
| 30:28.66 | Max Shank | I mean you would be too if you had ultimate power to stick somebody anytime. |
| 30:33.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, they the Knights ah a knight on a horse with armor could take out a Hundred peasants with ease. Ah and there's um, there's a. |
| 30:44.23 | Max Shank | A Hundred I think if those Hundred peasants had stick hundreds a lot I don't think so. |
| 30:54.54 | mikebledsoe | There's ah I was surprised by the statistics I was reading in That's to say he's on a horse a Knight a knight on a horse with let's say like a broadsw sword or something like that like most peasants aren't gonna touch him. He's gonna. |
| 30:57.50 | Max Shank | Maybe it feeds on a horse. |
| 31:05.90 | Max Shank | Ah. Most will run away. That's true. That's what happened with the the I think it was the Incas or something. It's a big It's a big difference I was talking about this at a party. Yeah. |
| 31:11.35 | mikebledsoe | Run right through him anyways, even if we say 25 whatever to huge difference so difference between like ah having a gun and a tank. |
| 31:28.28 | Max Shank | I Mean the difference between stick and no stick is actually pretty huge already. So it's just an arms race. But then we have this now instead of the rules of engagement of physical battle. It's the rules of engagement of stories and that's how we got to cooperate in. |
| 31:43.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, look yeah and and going back to what you're saying is the well what I was saying is the ah you come about making up a story of you're going to burn in hell. |
| 31:47.00 | Max Shank | In such big groups. We believe in the same tree spirit or something like that. |
| 31:58.60 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 32:00.49 | mikebledsoe | Which is basically what the catholic church did the catholic church came to the Knights and said hey you guys are doing a lot of raping and pillaging we got to get us under control so they created what's it called ah chivalry. |
| 32:06.00 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 32:16.50 | Max Shank | So so. |
| 32:18.51 | mikebledsoe | They created Chivalry so Chivalry Chivalry is a narrative like oh you want to be a chivalrous Knight because if you're chivalrous then you'll get the reward that you're looking for well being ah having Chivalry is the modern day citizen. |
| 32:21.79 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 32:29.78 | Max Shank | It's like ethics right? we were talking about a few podcasts ago. |
| 32:36.86 | Max Shank | Um, ah. |
| 32:38.48 | mikebledsoe | So being a chivalrous knight is the same thing as being a good citizen today. Oh aka good slave and so the yeah, an obedient slave. |
| 32:42.37 | Max Shank | A good citizen right? right? obedient I Think yeah yeah. |
| 32:54.98 | Max Shank | I Mean you don't want a disobedient slave that like totally defeats the purpose if you can't see the value of owning a slave then you're just kidding yourself I mean I can totally understand everyone has tried to enslave not everybody. But. |
| 32:59.62 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it makes they're difficult hard to. |
| 33:14.68 | Max Shank | Ah, so many so much slavery in the history of mankind. It's like hey do I want to do this work or do I want to sit on a horse with a whip while this other guy does the work I get it I get it. |
| 33:24.45 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, if you look at Western Society We have the least amount of slavery where I'd say we have the least where we're sitting in the in a world of like the least harsh slavery in all of human history. |
| 33:36.25 | Max Shank | And probably best for women's rights ever I mean you know about the bros before hose amendments. That's what I That's just what I call them So it's easy to remember we gave. |
| 33:43.55 | mikebledsoe | Now. |
| 33:53.30 | Max Shank | We're really losing her female audience right now. Ah we gave ah black guys. The ability to vote before women before white women and I just I just find that pretty funny because just before that black people were enslaved here. |
| 33:59.86 | mikebledsoe | Oh that's right. |
| 34:11.90 | Max Shank | But women were not enslaved but we just fast-track dudes to like yeah you can you could call the shots with a not you ladies though, you ladies no no and so you think about how that has accelerated so much and then in other parts of the world like I don't know. |
| 34:11.48 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 34:30.17 | Max Shank | The middle East For example, it's very clear pecking order right of who's in charge. But I think there have been some costs of that like for example, like ah in the. |
| 34:33.27 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 34:48.32 | Max Shank | Normal hollywood stories. Let's say the simpsons you know Homer simpson is an oaf married with children al Bundy is an oaf. So I think 1 of the things that is quite harmful and a little bit insidious is this. Male weakness where he's like always trying to like get sex with the lady and he's a dumb guy and he's like I mean even at the highest level we do this weird thing where presidents will be like oh well I got to check with the wife first to see if it's okay and you're like whoa this is like. What is going on here like this weak. Ah male figure is probably pretty destructive to the hearts and minds of our culture. |
| 35:39.22 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I ah um, will get away from such touchy subjects for a secondc I'll make it maybe a little more palatable here. Ah yeah, 1 of the. |
| 35:51.94 | Max Shank | I Think that's what you're here for. |
| 35:57.96 | mikebledsoe | But we ah if we want to look at the power of narrative if we look at tv shows we look at ah what happens in Tvs and movies who's always the oaf it like that. It's the personal trainer if you're the personal trainer. The coach you're you're dumb. He's a dumb meathead. |
| 36:14.92 | Max Shank | I am. |
| 36:17.52 | mikebledsoe | But then they make entire television series about these Genius doctors that are saving. People's lives in the Er emergency room but and so and on what the narrative is personal trainers are dumb miaheads and on the other end is these doctors are are complete geniuses. |
| 36:26.31 | Max Shank | Um, ah but. |
| 36:37.29 | mikebledsoe | And so we have an entire culture that doesn't want to listen to people who are telling them how to be healthy but will do anything somebody Lab coat will have on and it's really how it's been played out. That's the narrative but the yeah and. |
| 36:49.51 | Max Shank | Um, that's the appeal to authority that's that's 1 of the 2 main fallacies that we make appeal to authority and ad hominem attack and that goes right back into our language conversation because those are the 2 main things you see. |
| 37:00.49 | mikebledsoe | Well well couldn't the narrative be couldn't the narrative be that people who are say health coaches are fucking geniuses and they have the authority and you should listen to them because they know better. And medical doctors are are there just in case, you don't listen to the Health Guys. You know, just in case you were you were making poor decisions Now you got to go see this guy. You dumb Ass. So what? Ah what would it take for that that narrative to be painted. |
| 37:30.60 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 37:36.83 | mikebledsoe | And I mean I think we go back to law right? There are laws regulating Medicine way much more heavily than they are the health industry. So I see that I see the health and well there's ah, there's a way. Ah, okay, let's get into semantics here right? until we have yeah. |
| 37:44.72 | Max Shank | Oh yeah. |
| 37:54.79 | Max Shank | That's all we've been doing. |
| 37:56.47 | mikebledsoe | The Healthcare care industry right? people talk about Healthcare industry and then you know people go? Oh it's not the Healthcare care industry. It's the sick care industry and which is more accurate. Um, and people don't want to hear that they they like oh that's true, but they don't really dig into it. |
| 38:06.35 | Max Shank | No. |
| 38:16.50 | mikebledsoe | But ah, the way I've been thinking about more lately is we have a medical system and then we have a health system where we have a health industry and then we have a medical industry and the medical industry is not the health industry and the health industry is not the medical industry and the medical industry is getting all the attention it gets. People are listening to medical doctors are listening to all this but the the health industry has got if anything ah a more diminished voice ah over the yet last year and a half people like people who are more health oriented and preventative like. |
| 38:36.26 | Max Shank | And. |
| 38:55.50 | mikebledsoe | Mercola or rob wolf or abel james all these I I have many personal friends who have been censored and ah, what's it called shadow band. |
| 39:09.42 | Max Shank | We could do. We could do a whole show on censure censorship I think it's always bad though I think that is such a slippery slope because as Thomas Soul rightly Puts its. Not about what will we do? It's who will decide what we do so who gets to be the arbiter of what is true and what is not true and just from ah an uncommon sense standpoint What is the gain. |
| 39:35.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 39:49.11 | Max Shank | From silencing people why why would that happen in the first place |
| 39:56.73 | mikebledsoe | You don't want competing narratives. |
| 39:59.83 | Max Shank | Yeah, you have to protect your authority right? because the reality is people are very uncomfortable taking responsibility for their own lives. We've been taught from a young age. Let's put that responsibility on someone else, but. Where goes the responsibility also goes the power. So the reality is in America most most death maybe like 80 percent is self-caused by ah by a variety of things and that's a really high number. People commit suicide directly way more than they murder each other which I think shows how kind we ah really are at heart we would rather kill ourselves way higher. Yeah, it's like four x yeah, it's like. |
| 40:46.30 | mikebledsoe | We have a higher suicide rate than a murder rate is that what you're saying um I'm not familiar with these stats I'm not familiar with murder rates. |
| 40:57.50 | Max Shank | Yeah, it's not high. It's really low like we barely murder people at all relative to how much we kill ourselves directly with like a toaster in the bathtub or a bottle bottle of pills. |
| 41:05.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think we've lost more more soldiers in the united states more soldiers to suicide than than battle in the last twenty years |
| 41:14.74 | Max Shank | Yeah war seems really really tough and then so I have to add on to that statistic people would be like wait 80 percent of people get self-destruct yeah because if you sit on a couch for. 40 years and eat tons of cheetos or whatever your snack of choice is and you become very very fat like you're responsible for when you get diabetes didn't kill you you killed yourself and diabetes was just the way that you ultimately died. So. Most people kill themselves with their choices and there's a distinction I want to make and it's between fault and responsibility because I think if you see a fat kid. That's the parent's fault for sure. But if that. Fat kid grows up to be a fat adult then it's still their responsibility to decide whether or not they want to get healthy so it may not be their fault that they were set up in that situation I mean a lot of people have challenges or opportunities and. |
| 42:17.85 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 42:29.61 | Max Shank | Think it's going to be tougher. No question but you still have to accept that responsibility and once you realize that most people kill themselves quickly or slowly you start feeling that responsibility once again. For your own life and I think that's extremely valuable in terms of how how you live. |
| 42:54.41 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the the fault and responsibility distinctions. Great. That's something um you know at our previous Conversation. We talked about collapse distinction and what you're saying there is people that there what I What we've seen is a collapse distinction around fault and responsibility. And ah, it's a common phrase I've used in coaching which is and may not be your fault but it is your responsibility and I think's I think it's good for people to hear that because fault comes with a lot of times associated with guilt. |
| 43:21.50 | Max Shank | Great. |
| 43:32.70 | mikebledsoe | Um, it's my fault now I feel guilty about it when someone stuck gets stuck in and dwells in guilt. They usually have a hard time making the change necessary because now they start now when guilt arises a lot of the behavior that comes out of guilt is punishing 1 ne's self and. |
| 43:49.21 | Max Shank | You know for 1 |
| 43:50.97 | mikebledsoe | You're going to punish yourself by either making it worse or not changing so you have to get to a place of like looking at fault even if it is your fault is getting to a place of of forgiveness and then that way you can move into being responsibility and I think about responsibility as. Simply the ability to Respond. Do you have the ability to respond yes or no, okay, well then you're responsible now you can choose whether you're going to respond or not, that's that's up to you but again, we're back at choice and so I I think what you said was really important for people to hear is. |
| 44:15.22 | Max Shank | Great. |
| 44:27.97 | mikebledsoe | Fault and responsibility because when we look at if I look at Politics. For instance, there's a lot of people. What what? you'll hear them say is when something goes wrong. They we need to figure out who's responsible but they don't actually go look for responsibility. Because they would all have to look at themselves what they do is they they start looking at who to blame? Yeah, so it's like now they're looking at whose fault it is and who they can blame so they can they can ah externalize the shame and guilt so that they can then. |
| 44:49.44 | Max Shank | The whipping Boy. Right. |
| 45:04.66 | mikebledsoe | Keep doing whatever the fuck they wanted to do in the first place and while making the public at large you know angry at somebody and manipulating them. So so it's yeah. |
| 45:11.69 | Max Shank | Doesn't work. It doesn't work once you once you blame,, There's no end to the blaming. That's it. It's 2 Thousand year old book says that we it's It's not that we don't have access to the information. It's that. We let our ego get in the way we want to find retribution. We want to put the responsibility onto somebody else. We want to get ourselves as far away from the bad thing as possible because we want to think of ourselves as good and. That's also the primary barrier to change is we get so attached to the story that we've built up for ourselves I'm good because X Y Z or even I'm bad because X y Z people tend to hang onto them just as tightly which is so. |
| 46:00.42 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 46:05.39 | Max Shank | Fricking Weird right? You are stuck in this story of you and you are trying to get as much permanence as possible. That's what people mostly chase is they want permanence.. That's why um. When we're Dead. We Want little condos for ourselves. Still we want We want to like sit in a graveyard. We're like I'm still here I'm still here hey story of me still here not going anywhere I will last as long as this funny shaped rock and it's a crazy thing that we do So Everything comes back To. Story Story Story. The mass behaviors are story driven everything that we do professionally is often just to find Love. That's what's so funny if I show. That I can protect which in our era now is a house car and a retirement fund and you know you go up a boat a plane an island. |
| 47:12.49 | mikebledsoe | I'll tell you this yeah, that's accurate and when ah when ah dating my my girlfriend. Ah when she first saw me with with firearms and she saw how good I was with them. She was like oh my god I'm um. Just so turned on right now and I yeah, ah okay I was just I'll just trying to show you how to shoot. But. |
| 47:37.18 | Max Shank | That's very natural desires to be feel protected and I think that would you say that's the primary reason that ladies go for a wealthier. Dude It's for protection. It's for safety. |
| 47:48.89 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well, there's there's but there's protection and then there's provision as well as so ah and they go hand in hand First you got to protect? Yeah, but well. |
| 47:51.36 | Max Shank | You know that's the that's the bottom of Maslow's hierarchy |
| 48:01.18 | Max Shank | We don't want to collapse distinction. Those. |
| 48:07.63 | mikebledsoe | You protect first and then provide second you know yeah, all that all that comes down to safety. Yeah. |
| 48:08.74 | Max Shank | Um, well we could just call it safety Can you keep me can you keep me safe. Can you keep me safe and well you know the more simple language we can use in this particular case the better it is and. |
| 48:23.90 | mikebledsoe | Well, there's ah I've also ah gone on the other side of that which is looking at not so much about ah a lot of the safety he has to do with what we want to avoid but also ah how you were how you experienced love as a child. So some people. |
| 48:38.75 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 48:41.48 | mikebledsoe | Especially the the experience with their father whether you're a man or a woman your experience of your father. What was his how did you experience him? What was your fondest memories of him right? So ah for me. Ah I first. |
| 48:52.28 | Max Shank | Here. |
| 48:59.50 | mikebledsoe | Remember my my father as as a teacher whereas I noticed some people they saw their father as a provider or a protector and so that's how they show up in relationship so they'll show up because that's how they experience love so on the safety side that's well, it's about avoiding things but on the love side. |
| 49:00.78 | Max Shank | Earth. And. |
| 49:18.89 | mikebledsoe | About what we want to move towards and so if you can create safety then the next thing we we look at is well how did you experience your father and ah, how did you experience love from. How did you know that your father loved you like I know that my father loved me because of the way because he taught me and here I am I become. My primary role in my my work is to be a teacher and that's that's my way of showing love and so I also recognize the women that I date tend to be teachers in some way or or they lead in some way instead of I don't care if they make a lot of money because I Never really saw my dad as like. |
| 49:40.16 | Max Shank | Earth. |
| 49:56.88 | mikebledsoe | The primary role in him his life wasn't to provide for me but I'm not a lady in a lot of women I talked to that's how they experienced their dad as oh they provided me protected me all that and so that's what they look for. |
| 49:58.77 | Max Shank | But you're also not a lady. |
| 50:09.10 | Max Shank | Right? That makes a lot of sense I think we should call our podcast traps and treasures I really do I thought about it a lot I think that's the best 1 we have and it describes look. The reality is. |
| 50:20.47 | mikebledsoe | I Think it is too. |
| 50:27.90 | Max Shank | The average person could never listen to another podcast again and live totally well like that's what's so ironic about this experience for me is a lot of the time I feel like people just need to stop taking in so much input just just sit there. Quiet. With a piece of paper and think about what you really want like what is what is treasure mean to you? What does trap mean to you and that's what's so interesting about nurturing is we're implanting watch out for this look out for these. You're going to like these These are really bad. |
| 50:50.69 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 51:05.20 | Max Shank | And as I've said before for Gorillas it's so simple because they're like don't eat this green plant do eat this green plant and it's just do this Don't do this do this don't do this so that's what learning that's how learning can let you skip the line a little bit. Otherwise you have to experience every pain and fire Firsthand. That's the the big advantage of learning secondhand hey if you touch the fire you'll burn your hand now you can believe me. You can burn yourself on the fire and learn for yourself and I think we would agree that you do learn better through Firsthand experience but some things you don't want to risk you don't want to risk it for that traps and treasures. |
| 51:55.79 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, we now have the name the show traps and treasures now that's right, it's not it's not mike and Max or does a Maxim mike which 1 of us was first. Um. |
| 52:02.31 | Max Shank | With max and mike with Max and mike by the way I will um I I quit I quit unless my name is first. |
| 52:14.70 | mikebledsoe | Ah, um that's okay that's okay um I actually don't care that much I I care like I care like 1 percent. Yeah I like 1 percent. Maybe yeah. |
| 52:24.81 | Max Shank | He cares? he he cares. He just wants to look cool. He cares. |
| 52:33.78 | mikebledsoe | If I if if you didn't care at all my name First you care if you care 2 percent like I fucking give it to them. Um, so we got to subtitle this there's got to be like what's our. What's our mission statement here. |
| 52:34.28 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 52:49.47 | mikebledsoe | Is for traps and treasures. Yeah, who's the audience. What are we helping them with. |
| 52:49.79 | Max Shank | For for traps and treasures. |
| 53:01.96 | Max Shank | I mean maybe we can think about this a little bit before we just kill our airtime today. Yeah, let's do some more long awkward pauses I like it. |
| 53:06.29 | mikebledsoe | Um, it's the best way to end the show and the show with that. We're gonna do some ah research on this if anyone has any suggestions fire him over. So um, yeah in it. |
| 53:20.83 | Max Shank | That's ah I was thinking that you know there are there are traps and treasures within and without we can go into what to look out for. In a business partner or a romantic partner and we can also look out for what kind of thought patterns that we engage in and how we communicate with ourselves and how we I always talk about framing the experience. How you frame the experience. So for example, it's pretty windy and cloudy today in Southern california but I like it and I appreciate a sound such like a hippie but basically I really appreciate the the difference I like to see the. The wind blowing the leaves around and it looks very textured and cool and it's it's a nice change of pace and then the other experience the other frame of that experience is oh it's it's cold and I I hate this cold weather and it's so windy today and I think. The way that we frame our experience with language is really the only way to be happy ultimately because happiness is sort of like a fleeting feeling and it just depends on what you compare it to probably a better. Goal would be to remove as many of the ego barriers as possible and just flow with the natural rhythms of nature which is what we talked about last week so I think the traps and treasures within and without are. Totally framed by language so it can be languages like a knife you can stab yourself with it or you can perform surgery and save life. |
| 55:30.23 | mikebledsoe | Beautiful. |
| 55:31.69 | Max Shank | Language is also the ultimate leverage tool of human beings more than anything by far because it's allowed us to transcend space and time with our ideas and build upon them progressively. So if you want to learn how to use the best. Leverage tool we've ever come up with that's probably a good return on investment for your time. I mean if you just practiced your ability to communicate really practiced for like 2 hours a day within a year you'd be in the top five percent. So no matter what your personal interests were. You could be successful at them. I mean that's how that's how powerful it is I mean you don't need to do anything else you you can have the little phrase you can tell or be told. |
| 56:15.32 | mikebledsoe | You'd probably be in the top 1 percent. |
| 56:29.46 | Max Shank | And if you want to dig a hole That's great, but wouldn't you rather come up with a good plan and tell someone else where to dig the hole. But either way you got to tell or be told that's language. |
| 56:35.15 | mikebledsoe | Um, but you know the highest paid highest paid positions in the world would be salespeople and ceos job. |
| 56:47.10 | Max Shank | Because they can move people. |
| 56:50.49 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and well the job as Ceo is to communicate a vision that enrolls people into gets them excited to do a thing to create the future which he made up with his words or she and then the same with a salesperson I mean sales is just a conversation. |
| 57:00.93 | Max Shank | Ah. I Love that in a lot of companies. The person who sells the most gets more than the Ceo because that a lot because that is the most important thing and once you realize that that interaction. |
| 57:12.47 | mikebledsoe | That happens a lot. |
| 57:24.87 | Max Shank | With the customer I mean you and I have some experience in salesmanship and marketing and what's correct I bet you do ah the the value of being able to. |
| 57:31.76 | mikebledsoe | I Crush sales now. It's so much fun. |
| 57:44.15 | Max Shank | Put together a message that converts that you can leverage is crazy because it's not something that everybody can do ah language everybody most powerful tool We have. |
| 57:52.77 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's rare. Yeah yep, or we'll call it there call it there make sure to go to Maankank Dot com. |
| 58:02.24 | Max Shank | Available to us. Call it there I like it. |
| 58:12.37 | mikebledsoe | And Max shank and all the other platforms. |
| 58:15.74 | Max Shank | Make sure you check out mike underscore blood. So on Instagram thank you for joining us for traps and treasures with max and mike. |
| 58:20.54 | mikebledsoe | I Sure that's me. |
| 58:30.45 | mikebledsoe | Um, later. |
| 00:02.36 | Max Shank | Welcome back. Everyone to the max and Mike Podcast Hope you're having a lovely day. We're talking about long-term Strategy V versus short-term Burnout. There's a quote I like from the daw. Which is the flame that burns brightest burns half as long and I think that's a natural that's a natural method for super masculine guys. Anyone who's like trying to prove themselves or trying to achieve. A lot in a short amount of time. It's It's really common to experience some burnout I know I've experienced some burnout I would imagine that most of the people listening also have Mike I'm sure you have experienced some. Ah. |
| 00:58.34 | mikebledsoe | Few times. Yeah. |
| 00:59.80 | Max Shank | Burnout in your life a few times. So yeah, well I'm reminded of another quote from the dow I'll just quote the dow this whole episode because it's it's it's my favorite book. It really did. |
| 01:08.50 | mikebledsoe | Perfect. Well it makes sense to quote the doubt for this topic. |
| 01:18.28 | Max Shank | Put patience in a ah strong light and the the quote that I'm thinking of now is nature does not hurry and yet all is accomplished and kind of makes you start focusing on. Process rather than the result and it's a bit of a paradox because if you don't have a clear target in your mind you are maybe less likely to achieve it. But if you are so chaotically just maniacally focused on the result you won't. Appreciate the process of how to get there and you might have a little less craftsmanship. So it's kind of that balancing of the pain and the desire to achieve a certain goal versus the peace and presence of being where you are. And focusing on what you're doing like a ah Master craftsman. |
| 02:21.45 | mikebledsoe | It's so much more enjoyable to be in that craftsman space and being in that I guess we could call it like the craftsman versus the visionary and or like being to me a visionary is someone who who sets a ah. |
| 02:30.87 | Max Shank | Ah, what. |
| 02:38.26 | mikebledsoe | Ah, plan for the future but in a way that is clear where you also have the daydreamer So the visionaries like the the healthy way of seeing the future but the daydreamer is somebody who spent waste time. |
| 02:49.59 | Max Shank | What? but. |
| 02:55.47 | mikebledsoe | Thinking about what could be in the future but doesn't actually execute. But yeah I like the idea of having like the visionary is is 1 thing and the craftsman's on the other side and ah I've spent a lot of time in the visionary role and 1 of the things that i've. |
| 02:58.30 | Max Shank | Ah, but. |
| 03:13.53 | mikebledsoe | That I've needed to do because I grew up a daydreamer and then I started shifting that consciously into creating a very specific thing I would narrow my focus down onto. We're going to accomplish this and I noticed it what I've adjusted over time is the amount of attention I. |
| 03:15.58 | Max Shank | A. |
| 03:33.13 | mikebledsoe | Put into vision and the amount ah amount of attention I put into being the craftsman have shifted so I spend so when I I put a lot of attention into being a visionary I'll ah so I'll wipe an entire day on my schedule and once a year |
| 03:39.24 | Max Shank | Something like. |
| 03:50.94 | mikebledsoe | And I'll envision the next year for my business for instance and then yeah and then you know I create in every ninety days I meet with my team for a few hours to create the ninety day plan and every month we meet for like an hour to make sure that that month is squared away and so that's. |
| 03:55.18 | Max Shank | It's like chunking. |
| 04:09.41 | mikebledsoe | But rhythm that I found. That's really helped me balance out that visionary with execution and it's allowed me to really just focus in on the execution be a craftsman because I trust that the plan that I'm working towards that. What I what I've planned to execute. Is actually taking me to where I want to be and now when I'm executing I'm not thinking about the result I'm just thinking about doing the best job I can with a thing that's right in front of me right now and it's created a lot more patience and things have become yeah like life has been. More enjoyable I don't try to squeeze too much in too little time. Um, but you know hey I turned forty last week so this is definitely something that comes with age. |
| 04:50.95 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 04:59.90 | Max Shank | Well, some people never get there right? They live and die without really honing that skill of I just call it time travel skills. You know you look back to your books on the wall which is like your memories. You look forward into the crystal ball. Which is the future and then you have the ability to be super present here and now like ram dos style and if you're able to do that consciously like I am going to project myself into a potential future and. Iron out those details and clarify that vision. That's a superpower and if you're stuck there Forever. You are just swimming in anxiety and if you're going back into the past and you're able to do it expertly. That's how you learn and I mean. You know nostalgia is kind of like a dangerous thing too. I think but if you if you stay in the past too long. You can get depressed. You can get hung up on all of the stuff you did like oh I should have done it differently I mean I always think that way. |
| 06:10.13 | mikebledsoe | Or there's also like people who who they they they have the nostalgia of the past and then they are comparing it to the present moment and then and in a way the where the present's not as good as the past that doesn't happen as much with our friends probably. But. |
| 06:24.72 | Max Shank | Yeah, totally I mean. |
| 06:29.89 | mikebledsoe | If you look at the average person. The average 35 year olds probably like me in high school man that was when I was having all the fun. |
| 06:35.78 | Max Shank | Well, the only absolute is relativity. You can't describe something without describing something else first and when I think about the the stressors that I experience now here's a story that will make everyone hate me. And it will paint like a really good picture like so ah first it'll it'll make you like me and then it'll make you go fuck that guy so first I remember that my my mom left and my dad and my brother got really depressed. And I was doing all the work basically and my outward frustration was like nothing like I was upset about it but it was like whatever the other day 1 of the speakers in my steam shower stopped working. And I was like what the fuck and like 1 of those is like obviously worse like for a child to shoulder the burden of supporting a family is like way more than I mean I still had 1 steam shower speaker that was working right. Like it wasn't like a whole thing but it but it just goes to show that that like relativity you have this idea based on ah the past, but you also have um, kind of like feature creep. You know people don't like to go down. In Lifestyle chris rockt is like a hilarious bit. It's like women don't go down in lifestyle and he says he does like this whole thing where like once you get to a certain level. You never want to go the opposite way. So it's all it's all what you compare it to and if you get stuck. Like what you're talking about you either are looking back at the past as better than right now or you're looking back as like oh I I was bad then or I did something wrong and then you pull it you pull it with you into the present. So. |
| 08:43.40 | mikebledsoe | Um, a lot of people end up punishing themselves for a past behavior in the present moment which then just creates creates more negative future moments. |
| 08:49.81 | Max Shank | Being able. |
| 08:54.74 | Max Shank | Dude. It steals the potential joy and peace out of the present and I I did a ton of that like I would um, you know who knows exactly why but when I I would like rehearse and prepare for a conversation. Even. |
| 09:14.44 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 09:17.41 | Max Shank | And be like okay this person might say this and then I can say that and then I would also look back to times when I was like a child and be like oh so stupid for saying that that was so mean or that was so dumb and so I think it's it's normal. |
| 09:29.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 09:36.97 | Max Shank | To have those feelings. It's just whether or not you can let them go so that you can be present and you can also project forward with a with a powerful positioning like I can influence my life in a constructive way. |
| 09:39.91 | mikebledsoe | What. |
| 09:54.68 | Max Shank | Here's my future plan that is better and also I can come back to the present and do that deep work because if you're thinking if you're just thinking about the pot of gold If you're just thinking about the result you're probably not going to do as good craftsmanship. |
| 10:09.54 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, absolutely the way I look at ah emotions and memories. Ah, there are everyone has emotions they dwell on and emotions they avoid and you know. |
| 10:23.71 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 10:27.32 | mikebledsoe | People Probably a lot of people probably hear that and think yeah people dwell on happy you know, positive emotions or what's perceived as positive emotions and avoid negative and that's not necessarily true I know that for myself I used to dwell on guilt The the emotion of guilt and. |
| 10:38.77 | Max Shank | The hurt. |
| 10:46.46 | mikebledsoe | Like it. It was deep down in my gut and like I just felt guilt from like when I was a little kid. It just felt guilty a lot and then I got older and I felt guilty a lot and and the benefit of it of guilt is that you'll change your behavior because you're you're guilty about how you did something. |
| 10:54.74 | Max Shank | Are. |
| 11:03.74 | Max Shank | In here. |
| 11:05.78 | mikebledsoe | But the problem is is if any emotion. But even if it's joy if you're dwelling on that instead of just allowing that emotion to move because they they tend to move unless you suppress or or just um, start creating start. |
| 11:14.60 | Max Shank | Hit a. |
| 11:24.76 | mikebledsoe | Remembering stories that you associate with that feeling and you end up in a perpetual loop like oh everyone likely can understand this or go oh I do do that is thing about ah something you were you felt guilty about or bad about in the past and then you'll have that feeling. And then you'll have a thought of something else. You're guilty about and something else. You're guilty about and and so then you just end up having a bad day right? Yeah, this 1 thing triggers a memory which triggers the feeling and that feeling triggers more memories and so we end up practicing being in this. |
| 11:44.85 | Max Shank | Here. Right. |
| 12:02.37 | mikebledsoe | This pattern um like ah ah, a guiltridden pattern and yeah, they're just wasting so much energy and time being in a pattern versus just going like you were saying letting it go and to me the key to letting it go is to feel it fully go. You know what. I Don't really look at guilt as a negative thing. It's like it's a gift and I get to learn from it and I go look I am totally present with this emotion I Love it. I accept it I Love it and I got my lesson from it and then if you can do that. That's that's a superpower. |
| 12:39.64 | Max Shank | Ah, oh yeah, once you shine a light on it. It's no longer. Ah scary. It's no longer lurking in the shadows. There's a french phrase ah to know all is to forgive all never heard that 1 I like that 1 a lot. |
| 12:39.71 | mikebledsoe | Very few people can do that. |
| 12:44.75 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 12:54.33 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 12:59.22 | Max Shank | I Mean it's That's my translation. It's in French but I don't speak French Currently So um I mean I might I might later? Yeah, um, but when you think about your self. |
| 13:05.10 | mikebledsoe | But used to maybe or in the future. Yeah later. Okay. |
| 13:18.54 | Max Shank | Recognizing I mean I still am like this with myself you got to realize that you're a combination of different instincts and stories and all kinds of things where how could you not be more forgiving of yourself. You know like I I know so little still and you know I do this thing on my birthday where I just think man I've accomplished so little I don't really look at it as like a positive thing because it's more like feel like I'm a little bit behind ah my schedule which probably just From. Setting really high goals. But if you don't like forgive the fact that you are a monkey just trying to figure stuff out in some sort of Cyber Punk Weird Ah Lifestyle It's going to be really. Painful for you I mean the the whole reason that people do great or terrible things is because they're like deeply dissatisfied with the way things are right. So if you're not deeply dissatisfied with how the way things are ah you'll you probably do very little. You'll just Enjoy. So I think you said it best is you don't run from that emotion. You don't ignore that emotion. You experience it fully and I think Curiosity is the best way is like the most constructive ah mentality to have about it where you don't take anything personally I think that's 1 of those four agreements is do your best. Don't take anything personally. Um. |
| 14:51.65 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 15:08.68 | Max Shank | So yeah, getting getting curious about the emotion and accepting it and accepting the the fact that we are very emotional creatures if not the most emotional creatures and that'll make it so you're able to forgive yourself which is kind of a precursor for letting that stuff. |
| 15:17.89 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 15:27.84 | Max Shank | Go that doesn't serve you. |
| 15:28.20 | mikebledsoe | I Think that the taking ah I think we get further define taking things. Personally, this is a this is something that I see people get hung up on a lot and I had a ah a big breakthrough around. My thinking around taking things personally are you familiar with the concept of collapse distinction collapsed collapsed distinction. Okay so collapsed distinction is where ah the human mind. |
| 15:53.29 | Max Shank | Um, class distinction. No. |
| 16:05.47 | mikebledsoe | We'll take 2 words and they've collapsed them into the same meaning and so and people start behaving that way. 1 example is ah, there's a collapse distinction for ah, most mothers they have collapsed love and worry. |
| 16:21.97 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 16:23.38 | mikebledsoe | So it right? It makes sense right? Your mom the way she expresses love she doesn't if she's not worried about you. She doesn't feel like she's loving you and yeah, exactly and so. |
| 16:34.16 | Max Shank | She might feel guilty that she's not worried. |
| 16:42.58 | mikebledsoe | Um, in in Mothers learn this from their mothers. So this is something that's happened for a long time and so it's like there's a collapse distinction because if we look at but but for us so I'm a son you're a son. If our mom we get on the phone with arm change. Oh okay, the daughter. yeah yeah I think you should just go with the queue. That's what I do yeah I'm I'm ah questioning all the time. |
| 17:04.70 | Max Shank | I'm thinking of changing actually to daughter or or undecided. Perhaps I think I might be a tree actually. |
| 17:19.52 | mikebledsoe | Ah, so ah, was it somebody somebody so somebody somebody did somebody did I was like you was like well um I fall into the que category I'm I'm definitelyquet like once I realize the Q stand for questioning I go if you're not questioning what are you doing like. |
| 17:22.61 | Max Shank | Sorry for the derail. |
| 17:38.30 | mikebledsoe | And then somebody was like almost founded offensive that I would identify as questioning I go like you're straight I'm like like ah now you're questioning my identity So like like all of a sudden I'm not allowed to yeah, it's it's funny. Ah, anyways, let's get back to it Collapse distinction. Love and worry. |
| 17:51.30 | Max Shank | That's hilarious. |
| 17:57.50 | mikebledsoe | Ah, and as a son if my mom over the years has expressed worry for me. It's I don't experience. Love I'm experiencing. It's annoying. Yeah, yeah, it's fear which is a lot of people say those are opposites. |
| 18:06.80 | Max Shank | Fear fear which is a fear and love are are good opposites. Yeah that that once again that the distinction is important right? How you use those words. |
| 18:15.75 | mikebledsoe | Ah, but um. Yeah, and so we've collapsed something that is fear based with something that's love based and so ah, you know all we got to do is pull up these 2 definitions and what's the definition of love. What's the definition of Worry. These are very different things and don't even belong in the same category together. |
| 18:26.65 | Max Shank | Brutal. |
| 18:40.17 | mikebledsoe | So ah, that's ah, just as an example of a collapse distinction and so now now that we all have the awareness of there's something called collapse distinction that exists and the consciousness of Humans. We can then look for collapse distinction and the more distinction you can create successful distinction. That's the expansion of consciousness because we can look at at 1 aspect of consciousness is is built off of our vocabulary which is the structure of our thoughts and or ah the building blocks of our thoughts. Yeah well,, That's a whole. |
| 19:12.29 | Max Shank | Probably most. |
| 19:17.99 | mikebledsoe | We can go down that rabbit hole sometime. Ah, but we should define consciousness. |
| 19:18.70 | Max Shank | I Mean everything that's not instinct everything. That's not instinctual is a artificial creation Thanks to language. |
| 19:27.68 | mikebledsoe | Yes, yes, so 1 of the things that I 1 of the the collapse distinctions I stumbled upon a couple years ago was ah being sensitive and taking things personally so what I noticed is people would say. |
| 19:42.31 | Max Shank | A. |
| 19:47.51 | mikebledsoe | Oh You're just being sensitive when they really meant you're taking it personally I go. They're not being sensitive. They're taking it Personally, they're actually being insensitive by making it about them and so to me taking it personally means that. I am taking whatever is happening in the world and I'm making it mean something about me. Usually it's a very selfish thing to do and or it or it can be in a positive way still be.. You're still taking it personally. |
| 20:09.39 | Max Shank | And usually in a negative way talk totally totally well it well what it is is. It's putting yourself into a victim role and taking it. It. It's funny because it is literally taking you are taking it. |
| 20:24.20 | mikebledsoe | But it's usually negative. |
| 20:34.29 | Max Shank | And you are making it personal to yourself so that you can adopt that victim mentality and take on that victim role which is super effective in getting you attention and I think the word is conflate. You don't want to conflate. |
| 20:43.83 | mikebledsoe | Ahead. |
| 20:50.64 | Max Shank | Being sensitive with taking things personally because being sensitive is actually a huge advantage if you want to be successful in life. It's very useful to be sensitive to all sorts of things and there are all kind of different sensitivity like for. Ah, developing really good feel in your fingertips. You can lay a hair in between 2 pieces of paper and you can try to feel that single hair between the 2 pieces of paper. So If you're trying to become like a body worker having that sensitivity is a huge Advantage. Advantage being sensitive to someone's body language I mean using the 5 senses that's sensitivity you're hearing so sensitivity is crazy superpower if you can pick up on a person's energy. |
| 21:36.50 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 21:45.58 | Max Shank | And dogs are of course good at this because they're not so encumbered by a lot of the language things right? So There's all kinds of senses and sensations and sensitivity that we have that is crazy powerful. Ah so it's important to not conflate that like you said with taking things personally. Which is just like um the crying ego trying to get attention for no reason. |
| 22:09.13 | mikebledsoe | Well that there's this is what is 1 things that made me notice it is people I would hear people go Oh I'm I'm an empath I'm very sensitive and then I hear them talk about their experience of the world and I go. You're just taking everything personally, you may be sensitive if you're both sensitive. And you take things Personally, you're in a bad spot. That's that's a rough life to live like you're picking up on everything and you're making it all mean something about you. That's Hard. So I I Tell people all the time is like people go people go Well, you don't know you're not really that sensitive I go. |
| 22:38.10 | Max Shank | Um, I Totally yeah oh yeah. |
| 22:48.15 | mikebledsoe | Oh I'm very sensitive and and ah and that's why I don't take things personally is because like you're not going to see me get triggered because I know that it's not about me like I It's not that I believe it. It's just I know it's not and so ah. |
| 22:54.47 | Max Shank | Um, right. |
| 23:07.22 | mikebledsoe | The way that people are treating me all this I was like it has nothing to do with me. It has it's it's them and it's if you can be both sensitive and you don't take things personally now that's a superpower. But if you're somebody who's sensitive and then you tend to make everything that you're perceiving about you. |
| 23:19.56 | Max Shank | Agreed. |
| 23:26.88 | mikebledsoe | You're you're on the opposite end you're fucked. So I think a lot of people. They don't know how to not take things personally so they end up trying to desensitize themselves because it's just too much. |
| 23:39.70 | Max Shank | Yeah, Wow. It's so true and I think subconsciously um some people want that they want to take on that role. It's like ah some people like to whip and some people like to be whipped and. |
| 23:53.85 | mikebledsoe | Here. |
| 23:57.53 | Max Shank | You know if you don't have a physical whip handy. Maybe you can just engage in a little psychological self-torture anytime. So it's it's fascinating and I've never heard that collapsed distinction before. |
| 24:03.47 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah. |
| 24:12.23 | mikebledsoe | Okay, okay. |
| 24:14.74 | Max Shank | I Think conflate means something almost similar like you either. It's like you confuse and combine words I'm pretty sure that's what it is yeah come. |
| 24:21.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well yeah, um, yeah, maybe I need to I need to look it up. |
| 24:28.44 | Max Shank | combine it's combine 2 or more ideas or words into 1 Yeah. |
| 24:30.82 | mikebledsoe | Perfect I think that's that's good. Um, the reason I used the words collapse distinction I've not heard I've heard it from a couple people it's not widely used. Um I like it because ah, there's an opposite to collapse distinction which is just. |
| 24:40.26 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 24:49.52 | mikebledsoe | Distinction whereas like conflate. It's like well what's what's the opposite of that. There's what what happens after we stop conflating whereas with ah with a collapse distinction I go Well, there's distinction and then there's collapse distinction. So ah. |
| 24:49.52 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 24:54.91 | Max Shank | Specific right? Distinction. We really should do a whole topic on language 1 of these days because that's 1 of the roots of pretty much every problem a person has right. |
| 25:07.98 | mikebledsoe | Anyways. |
| 25:20.26 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 25:23.42 | Max Shank | You know, even Ecker tolly would say you know there there are no problems. There are only situations and all of this is just based on how we frame our experience with language and the whole concept of semantic precision which is using language. Where both parties agree on the definition. That's where most miscommunication happens like my my feeling in the world is like I Just want to like yell stop to everybody I Just want to like put my hands up and be like hey whoa. I Think there's been a misunderstanding whoa This got out of hand like I think we're just not understanding each other properly. You know. |
| 26:04.26 | mikebledsoe | Um, well. |
| 26:12.25 | mikebledsoe | That's ninety Nine point nine percent of the time. Yeah I mean I if you I and and the phrase that drives me nuts to someone someone goes. Oh that's just semantics and I go what. |
| 26:25.68 | Max Shank | That's the only tools we have to argue you want a fist fight. That's all we got. |
| 26:28.19 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah people you're like oh that's just semantics I'm like I'm like whoa whoa Whoa If you're somebody who goes that's just semantics and you are likely missing you. You actually don't know what's happening in the world like in you, you not can be able to communicate it. |
| 26:42.45 | Max Shank | Well, you don't even know what's happening you don't even know what's happening within your own structure of your own ideas because the whole purpose is to get both parties to agree on what the definitions are so that you can have a distinct. Discourse or a precise discourse where everybody's like yes, this is what conflate means this is what collapse distinction means this is what love means you know like even even in something like marriage right? You know people are so nebulous with ah. What they're looking for in a relationship and then they're like I'm not getting what I want. It's like well did you specifically ask and did the other person agree to that and they're like well no, it's like embarrassing and I'm like oh well, um you you brought this on yourself like yeah, right is. |
| 27:33.53 | mikebledsoe | Good luck, Good luck with life. Ah. |
| 27:39.25 | Max Shank | It's so brutal I mean that's why like a lot of the first language was um, keeping tally of agreements like the most of the the um ancient texts are like. |
| 27:45.70 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 27:54.60 | Max Shank | I don't know I'm going to show my ignorance here I don't exactly know. But I think it's like sumerian or something like that where it's like you know Bob smith that's not the name like but Bob smith owes you know Joe blow 3 cattles and a bushel of. You know acorns or something like that I don't know I'm not super hip with it. But that's basically what the first what the oldest written language we have is. |
| 28:14.42 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, right I got I give you my daughter and exchange you get me 2 walks and fifty had a goats and yeah. |
| 28:22.20 | Max Shank | Ah, right right? Fifty Silver so shekels or something like that. |
| 28:32.66 | mikebledsoe | Ah, all right? Let's let's bring it back to the rhythm when we got off on a language tangent which is great because I actually think we'll we'll likely do that a lot in the future and I already wrote down the put language and all that for the for the next next episode let's get back to rhythm. Um I'll bring it back in. |
| 28:43.35 | Max Shank | Yeah, should just make that our next 1 come come nice and prepared. Yeah, so. |
| 28:52.47 | mikebledsoe | Little bit of a hard left. But I think it's necessary ah is ah 1 of my buddies he once we once got started talking about cycles. So we if we talk about um I think about seasons and cycles when I think about rhythm and. |
| 28:56.00 | Max Shank | It's good time. |
| 29:06.88 | Max Shank | Um, threat. |
| 29:12.21 | mikebledsoe | Ah, because I think sometimes when I just think about rhythm by itself I think about a song.. There's a there's a beginning and an end and there's ah a cadence but with seasons of course it's circular and ah so it's it's predictable over and over and over again. But. I think we can all see the four seasons and ah so my buddy brought this to my attention. At 1 point he goes. Okay so you have your daily cycle and then you have your like if we look at real cycles in nature outside of ourselves We have the sun. The. |
| 29:43.79 | Max Shank | Sun Moon. Yeah. |
| 29:48.71 | mikebledsoe | Lunar cycles which is about 13 of them in a year um which basically the gregorian our calendar is totally fucked but um, it's not lined up with nature necessarily. Ah so it's close. |
| 30:03.30 | Max Shank | It's pretty close with the solar cycle. What propose a better 1 mike ah I'll meet with you 3 moons from now. |
| 30:07.40 | mikebledsoe | They have to make it Well we talk about that later, but ah, um, you could just go off the moon but the the yeah but ah, well, there's the Mayan calendar which is which follows the lunar cycles. So I know someone who runs their business Ho The lunar. |
| 30:21.99 | Max Shank | The. |
| 30:26.94 | mikebledsoe | Have the Mayan calendar but ah, she's far out there? Yeah yeah, yeah. |
| 30:29.72 | Max Shank | It's pretty far out I like it I think you got to respect those cycles I think temp I think tempo um and cycles are are very similar I don't think tempo or Rhythm necessarily means a song i. |
| 30:43.44 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 30:45.82 | Max Shank | Have this time time is illusion but Tempo is real is this sort of thing I have going on in the back of my head because the whole concept of linear time is just based on our singular perception of it and our memory are. |
| 30:48.96 | mikebledsoe | A b. |
| 31:02.24 | mikebledsoe | Me. |
| 31:04.46 | Max Shank | That's that's all it is memory and prediction. That's our only evidence that there is a such thing as time but the tempo of these different things like the sun and the moon and the seasons those are very concrete and they're circular. They're not. |
| 31:21.89 | mikebledsoe | Right? Yeah, so we got we got the sun. We got the moon and then you you start expanding out into the universe and there's there's a cycle happening in our our well just in the cosmos in general and then you get down to you know I think it's easier to see in women. They have their. |
| 31:22.55 | Max Shank | Ah, linear. What. |
| 31:41.34 | Max Shank | And. |
| 31:41.68 | mikebledsoe | Monthly cycle. That's happening internally and you know their training and their nutrition is going to shift based on you know if you're an athlete will will shift based on those things and and. |
| 31:52.95 | Max Shank | They usually leave them out of studies. A lot of scientific studies. They cut women out of because they have the huge change during a monthly cycle which is fascinating. |
| 31:56.41 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 32:02.43 | mikebledsoe | I think men have I think it's a seventy 2 day cycle that is more subtle so it's over a longer period of time and it's not so drasstic. So just not as noticeable. |
| 32:09.67 | Max Shank | Are. |
| 32:16.85 | Max Shank | That explains why I've been so grumpy this I think I'm on I think I'm on my man period. |
| 32:21.21 | mikebledsoe | I've had that happen I go ah, that's right? Ah so I look at these cycles and look at the seasons and and 1 of the things that really ah I really started appreciating my thirty s and I actually think living on the water. And san diego in a house that had a lot of ah, a lot of natural light helped me understand the seasons much better. 1 is being on the water allowed me to see the sun move across the sky I watched the sunset almost every day. |
| 32:45.00 | Max Shank | And. |
| 32:57.60 | mikebledsoe | And so it moved from from North to south and south to North ah across the west coast ah line and then it also was you know in the in the middle of the Summer. It's nine zero pm or little later setting and in the winter I mean it's four fifty and it's dark outside. |
| 33:10.59 | Max Shank | Okay. That was a great house. |
| 33:15.89 | mikebledsoe | And great house and I miss it. Ah and it was during that time that I really started honoring the seasons because prior to that I was. When I was living in memphis tennessee and I was running the gym like I was up at the gym at 6 a m no matter what time of year it was and I was under fluorescent lights. There was no I was killing all the natural cycles and and I wasn't done till nine zero p m and I'd get home and and everything was the same. |
| 33:45.22 | Max Shank | Are. |
| 33:52.36 | mikebledsoe | All the time and I was worn out and I didn't know why and then a few years into living in the San diego in this environment and I noticed that I worked less in the winter a lot less like probably half half the amount of time during the day in the winter I would I noticed that I would. Consume weed at night in the winter and and I would do movement at night and then when it started getting warm in the summer I would do my movement sober in the morning and so like I I now adopt that so in in the winter I start I train in the evenings and. |
| 34:15.80 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 34:20.48 | Max Shank | Um, her. |
| 34:29.54 | mikebledsoe | Summer I trained the mornings so I just witnessed my personal preferences based on I really got sensitive I was practicing sensitivity to the season and I also noticed that and in the summertime there's more parties it. |
| 34:29.63 | Max Shank | Interesting. |
| 34:38.57 | Max Shank | And. |
| 34:46.69 | mikebledsoe | Ah, people are celebrating um I work a lot more I stay up later I get less sleep I get like 7 hours of sleep on average in the summer and the winter I'm getting 8 and a half to nine and I go to less parties and I I read more in the winter. It's the winners all about reflection. |
| 34:53.36 | Max Shank | A. |
| 35:05.56 | mikebledsoe | About consuming. It's about resting and and more of just being and the spring hits and it's like oh you know I'm starting I'm almost tired of doing little and reflecting I've learned a lot I've reflected on what happened last year I'm ready to kick this year's ass and you spring in the action. And in the summer you're rolling and then the fall you know is the harvest and and by you know it's october now. So now. My experience is ah is I'm going oh man I'm so glad the parties are ending. So glad the sun's going down early because. |
| 35:39.14 | Max Shank | Simply. |
| 35:42.79 | mikebledsoe | I'm really feeling the desire to read and reflect and and get more sleep right now and so having that sensitivity to the seasons has really allowed me to ah just in all areas of my life. You know we can look at business and then the winner is just as wait. |
| 35:48.58 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 36:02.40 | mikebledsoe | I've got a lot more strategy going on. There's less less doing and in the summer it's you know you know? Um, um, there's a lot more execution happening and less strategy. So it's um, it's welcome and it's enjoyable and it keeps me interested in life. |
| 36:12.35 | Max Shank | And. |
| 36:19.55 | mikebledsoe | Having those seasons. |
| 36:21.69 | Max Shank | There's some wisdom there too and I see wisdom as knowing yourself and acting accordingly and it sounds like you are really honoring your natural tendencies rather than fighting your natural tendencies because. Whether it's a macro cycle like ah the periods in your life where we're going to be at different places right? I mean I'm um, I'm in a pretty different place now at 34 than I was at 21 right? I'm in a different kind of position and different situation. |
| 36:52.10 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 36:58.52 | Max Shank | And even throughout the day. Everybody's going to have a different rhythm to when they're feeling more energized when they're um, more likely to do a certain type of work I mean I've fought it for a long time because I. Want to be on a Circadian rhythm but actually I do my most interesting creative work at night when it's quiet and you know I would I love ah the idea of going to bed at 8 o'clock and waking up at four o'clock and when I do that. |
| 37:21.69 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 37:32.90 | mikebledsoe | They have. |
| 37:36.64 | Max Shank | Get even less done. It's it's just way worse. So ah, you know I'm good I always turn the screens off at 8 o'clock but I don't necessarily go to bed around that time and that makes a huge difference. So anyway back to what I said about. |
| 37:45.42 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think I mean for me the way I The the way hit me for that is I I just I turn my screens off when the sun goes down so it's like instead of it instead of it being at a specific time I go Oh it's getting. |
| 37:59.56 | Max Shank | That's even better. Yeah. |
| 38:05.21 | mikebledsoe | Dark I try to live in homes where it's natural light during the day and I'm not using any artificial light. So when the sun goes down it becomes obvious. |
| 38:07.92 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 38:13.30 | Max Shank | Well and it's that built in rest from those things right? I mean what is it even god rested once a week even god rested on Sundays or something like that and to use ah a fitness analogy. Um, you can't you can't sprint. |
| 38:21.37 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 38:32.91 | Max Shank | All out all the time. All you're going to do is make the result worse and start running a lot slower. So if you ride the waves you're going to get a lot more out of it and you're going to expend way less energy doing it. You know if like. I'll use jumping as an example, if I had you jump a Hundred times by the hundredth jump if you did it all in a row. It would be horrible looking jumping a Hundred times really high. But if I had jump 3 times every minute. Like you could probably do thirty minutes of jumping and be a little better and even 1 step ahead of that if I had to do 3 jumps every minute for ten minutes three times a day then it's going to be even better than that. So this whole idea of trying to grind through. Rather than draw some boundaries and set yourself up so you can ride that momentum I mean look the reality is like you don't even have to do that many things to be wildly. Successful. But you can do it the the hard way or you can do it the easy way. And if you respect those rhythms and respect your nature It's so much easier, but that does require that ability to see the big picture which is the visionary mode and then also get into the the craftsmanship mode. |
| 40:03.87 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, there's a word you use that I find to be very important that is boundaries and most people have very poor boundaries. You're good. You're good. You're good at the boundaries I'm a lot better. |
| 40:09.52 | Max Shank | I Am That's my best skill I got the fastest know in the west I'm good. Yeah some people call that unfriendly. |
| 40:22.52 | mikebledsoe | Ah, max du an asshole. Ah yeah I've had people in my life. You know they'll they'll be like if he doesn't want to do it. He's not going to do it or if I do want to do something I'm going to do it. |
| 40:26.50 | Max Shank | I Just I just love myself. That's all. |
| 40:36.70 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 40:40.77 | mikebledsoe | It's It's more about like negotiate like if I'm know whoever I'm dating so turns into a negotiation about how it's going to happen versus if it's going to happen or whatever it is or not going to happen. Yeah, so. |
| 40:49.80 | Max Shank | If you can't say no, it's not negotiation. Can't walk away. It's no negotiation at all. |
| 40:58.85 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, but I think the boundaries conversation. You know I see there's internal boundaries and external boundaries and people are constantly crossing their internal boundaries. There. You know they go Oh I'm going to turn off my screens when the sun goes down or or whatever it is and then they don't do it or I'm going to stop. You know, binge watching television and cracking a beer when I get off work and they just cross that boundary and over and over again. They end up hating themselves for it usually projecting that anger on to you know their job or a relationship or yeah to kick the dog or whatever it is and. |
| 41:20.73 | Max Shank | The. |
| 41:30.99 | Max Shank | Take the dog right. |
| 41:37.84 | mikebledsoe | So There's like the the setting and the maintaining of boundaries is really really Important. Ah for for growth and the way I look at it is if we study archetypes if we look at like masculine archetypes the King sets the boundaries. The King has a kingdom. And says these are the edges of my kingdom. This is what I will and will not do and this is these are the rules that we live by in my kingdom but the warrior their job is to maintain those boundaries and so what I see a lot of a lot of men who end up in this like really flowy place is they have no boundaries. |
| 41:59.26 | Max Shank | The. |
| 42:06.10 | Max Shank | Is. |
| 42:15.17 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 42:16.66 | mikebledsoe | Because they're there even if they want to have boundaries their warrior is so weak that they they just fold to their internal boundaries all the time and so there's a lot of guys running around acting tough who have zero warrior energy being directed at. |
| 42:23.67 | Max Shank | And. |
| 42:36.24 | mikebledsoe | Ah, maintaining boundaries and so ah and if you can't maintain your internal boundaries. You're not going to maintain healthy external boundaries and a lot of people on the external boundary side people. They don't um. |
| 42:36.94 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 42:55.35 | mikebledsoe | First off, most people don't communicate their boundaries as boundaries. They may communicate it but they don't use the word boundaries I find that if I use the word boundary with somebody it catches their attention they go. Oh he's being serious because it's just not a common word and ah so external boundaries usually aren't communicated. |
| 42:57.31 | Max Shank | Um, right right? Yeah, ah. |
| 43:15.70 | mikebledsoe | And again someone else crosses our external boundary. What happens if you cross my external boundary and I didn't communicate it to you I usually get angry. You know people get angry. They're like but the fuck and you're going what happened I don't know um and so ah. |
| 43:24.91 | Max Shank | Lash out and right off. |
| 43:33.37 | mikebledsoe | Learning to communicate boundaries effectively All the time will create a lot of respect from other people and it keeps things really really clean and if something if something does need to shift in a relationship and you've been communicating the boundary as being broken over and over and over again. |
| 43:41.73 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 43:52.36 | mikebledsoe | And it's an easier thing to to satisfy to to move away from it's like oh we have Ah, we've documented that this boundary's been crossed a dozen times like you're not honoring my boundariary. So yeah, we're gonna We're gonna shift this relationship. |
| 43:58.12 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 44:06.80 | Max Shank | Well and you draw your own line of what you're going to tolerate or not and it's It's fine to compromise as long as you know what? you're getting for what you're giving. Um I think I think fasting is really good for drawing those boundaries. |
| 44:16.22 | mikebledsoe | Now. Yeah. |
| 44:24.55 | Max Shank | I mean I don't want to label myself. Um, but I usually don't have 1 of something I have like zero of something or I have lots of that something and I think fasting is really good for drawing. |
| 44:37.27 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 44:44.12 | Max Shank | That critical boundary of your intake and I made a little video about it and I talked about how the main benefit of fasting to me is going from um, compulsive to conscious behavior and that's. |
| 44:59.49 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 45:03.69 | Max Shank | Really at the core of what we're talking about and when I was on this other show I got asked like what's the way to get rich and I said deferred gratification and they said anything else I'm like not really like if you're able to defer gratification until later and you provide something. Valuable. It'll it'll eventually work out if you can see the big picture and stay focused then the other stuff will sort of happen organically I think and look you can go. We can go into way more detail as far as how to get rich and stay rich which would maybe be another. Good topic for a show because we have similar but different similar similar and different strategies on that. Um. |
| 45:41.79 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah, like that 1 |
| 45:48.37 | mikebledsoe | Well I've ah ah we we come from. We have different personalities when it comes to our approaches to business and wealth building but we also have agreement on a lot of Concepts so it'd be. It'd be interesting. |
| 45:56.90 | Max Shank | Totally right. Right? Yeah, it flows so easy. |
| 46:07.20 | mikebledsoe | I Mean that's why we have these conversations because we we've come to. We've come to similar conclusions from different points of view all right. We'll do the get rich stay rich. |
| 46:18.58 | Max Shank | That's that's what we like about other people too. We like that they're different but similar right? Um I think for tying this rhythm thing back into business I think the value of. |
| 46:21.24 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 46:35.58 | Max Shank | Putting together a campaign is quite valuable and having it be. You know I'm not just like doing x y and z all day every day there's the visionary comes up with this plan and then we have this. Execution that lies on a bit of ah, a tempo or a cycle. So like let's say you and I were going to start a new business and we didn't set any boundaries for when we're going to, um, you know do the brain. Swarming I call it I don't I don't call it brainstorming I call it brain swarming like it's everything all these different things kind of coming together and moving as a unified unit. But if we don't have like a stop for that phase. And think it's easy to imagine that you and I would just stay in Dreamland brainswarming forever and be like oh and what if we did this and what if we did that and if you have this sort of tempo. For that campaign where it's like first we're going to do this and then we're going to build and then we're going to delegate and then we're going to build and then this is going to be our follow up tempo and touch points and that's the same thing with coaching is how often am I going to touch base. How often am I going to reach out to you. What's our. |
| 47:57.70 | mikebledsoe | Oh. |
| 48:01.79 | Max Shank | But's our tempo for it and for me weekly is really good. For example in my experience. That's the best of course if you have someone who can check in with you every single day. That's probably going to give you an even better result. Something like coaching hey you know how to go Yesterday. What's the plan today boom boom boom and you kind of work through it and clearly that there's a benefit to that. Otherwise no 1 would need a coach but the reality is ah. |
| 48:27.78 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 48:39.25 | Max Shank | Ah, Coach often gets you to do something. You know you should. |
| 48:40.62 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, I also see the the necessity for creating our own you know and I think about this I think about creating your own structure because that creating that rhythm that tempo is a structure. Um and is. |
| 48:50.59 | Max Shank | So. |
| 48:57.64 | mikebledsoe | I Think there's also why coaching is is becoming really important right now is because more and more as as the world decentralizes people are becoming more and more responsible for their own schedule and you know we saw this with Covid people started working from home and there was. |
| 49:09.16 | Max Shank | Um, now that's tough. |
| 49:17.50 | mikebledsoe | Ah, go oh wow people. Ah first I was like people probably won't work that much and then I start hearing reports that people are working way more because there's no boundary set up for them like oh you show up to work at this time and then you leave work and so they were just like working all the time at home like whoa and so um. |
| 49:22.17 | Max Shank | M. |
| 49:31.56 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 49:37.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, there's a lot of factors there. But as the Covid just sped things up. They were already there which is the world is decentralizing more people are going to work from home. There's gonna be more freelancers less employees and like more contractors and if you're a freelancer. |
| 49:38.78 | Max Shank | What and the. |
| 49:49.90 | Max Shank | The and. |
| 49:55.76 | mikebledsoe | 1 of the beauties of being a freelancer is you have control of your own schedule and that is a new thing for people. |
| 50:07.14 | Max Shank | I've always wanted that that was like the really since I was a young kid that was the only thing I wanted is the freedom to live on my own schedule. You know I felt like something was taken away from me as soon as I had to start going to school I'm like this is awful I don't want to do this I Want to go out and play with the stick. |
| 50:13.64 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 50:24.80 | Max Shank | But and I think kind of to borrow your term again. Um, collapsed distinction with the work and home life I think that's 1 of the um. |
| 50:41.47 | Max Shank | Challenges or opportunities for entrepreneurs I've certainly noticed that myself I mean the reality is I I did work tons and tons of hours getting to where I'm at now and that number has significantly decreased as I've gained more skill and drawn better boundaries. But if you. Are suddenly thrown into this scenario where the place you work is the same place that you eat and the same place that you also have a computer where you can see anything anytime you will get that collapsed distinction. Where now everything is just always happening right here at the console I'm working and then I'm in the kitchen eating cookies and then there are boobies on the screen and you're just kind of like this everything everything all at once where you don't have that clear. |
| 51:37.83 | mikebledsoe | Yeah work. |
| 51:38.78 | Max Shank | Distinction of when it's work time and when it's relaxed time and I think that is a very just as valuable. Maybe as being able to consciously rather than compulsively project your thinking into the future project your thinking into the past. |
| 51:45.73 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 51:58.38 | Max Shank | And also bring yourself directly into the here and now and just go for a walk and let your ah conscious mind be alleviated of all of these you know, urgencies and emergencies and problems and all of these labels. We attach to. |
| 52:16.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah now. Yeah. |
| 52:18.18 | Max Shank | Things trying to ask you for your time but you still have the power to draw that boundary and say no. But if you don't if you don't It's game over like people will infringe on your boundaries and they will respond to. However, you train them to respond. |
| 52:35.50 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 52:37.58 | Max Shank | Basically um, which is kind of weird I don't mean that in a derogatory way at all. But you know if someone complains to you and then you respond to them favorably favorably. You're in inviting them to do that more if someone says hey can you can you stay. You know 3 hours late or come in and work on Sunday and you just always say yes, well, they're just going to always ask you to come work on sunday. |
| 53:01.77 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I like the thing about it as you're a character in a movie and or if you've ever studied you know fiction. You know you basically create a character and then the character. Based on their characters how they respond throughout the story or the movies like oh that was it would be weird that'd be at a character of this character if james bond you know, walked away from you know a hot woman. It would be it would be at a character like no james bond like. |
| 53:21.61 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 53:31.11 | Max Shank | That would be out of character right. |
| 53:36.70 | mikebledsoe | He orders a martini. He chats her up at the bar. Ah, and so we are all characters in a movie and we have this script playing all the time and. |
| 53:45.72 | Max Shank | God am I the villain or the hero I'm not even sure if I become a villain I would be a hell of a good Ark though. |
| 53:54.64 | mikebledsoe | And and ah, what ends up happening is people are casting us as characters in their movie and ah if you start making 1 of these changes. For instance, you go you know what? I'm going to shift my character I'm going to develop my character. By creating boundaries that I communicate now it can be jarring for other people because now they have this expectation of the character in which they perceive you to be and now you you aren't that and people tend to dislike change. So Now you're throwing a wrench. |
| 54:20.61 | Max Shank | Um, then again. |
| 54:34.33 | mikebledsoe | And their their consciousness and they go but but but and a lot of times it comes out as Anger or disappointment or whatever it is and so for me I I really make sure that my first impression with people is you know it's an anchor experience. They're now this. Moment in time. How they how they're interacting with me now is how they're gonna end up treating me in the future because changing that over time can be difficult so I'm very good at holding the boundaries from from the very beginning. They know my boundaries. They're not gonna think anything of it. They're not gonna be mad about it. The people are gonna get mad at. |
| 55:06.60 | Max Shank | Like. |
| 55:13.78 | mikebledsoe | My new boundaries are the people who I've already got very established relationships with and now I'm creating something new. |
| 55:16.49 | Max Shank | Well, it's like momentum. Well it's physics right? If you have momentum in a certain way and people expect that certain thing if you change there's going to be a new acceleration or a Jolt and a jerk and that's going to be really uncomfortable. |
| 55:30.96 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, so yeah, and summary for that is it I think a lot of people are going to get out of this is to be more conscious of their internal boundaries external boundaries notice. |
| 55:34.84 | Max Shank | No. |
| 55:49.60 | mikebledsoe | The rhythms that that exist in the world and with themselves and being able to honor that and making those changes to honor your own rhythms and the rhythms of the universe are going to make your life a lot better but in the short term making those changes and and experiencing that. Change in acceleration can be a little jarring and just realizing that hey this short term difficulty and making these ah changes for me and and others will be worth it. Long term because once you get them set and you're rolling life. Gets a lot better. |
| 56:28.43 | Max Shank | I Think it's also yeah I would agree with what you said completely I would also suggest people start timestamping their start and stop times when they're working on stuff and notice for themselves when they're doing their best work. |
| 56:38.56 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 56:44.20 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 56:46.55 | Max Shank | And when things start to deteriorate and you know the whole point of what we're doing really is to liberate people from the false realities that have been programmed into them from a huge variety of sources and it's natural to want to get. Ah, greater effect for less effort. There's nothing more natural than that we want. We want to be as efficient as we possibly can. So if you do respect those boundaries if you do draw those boundaries if you do um draw a clearer. |
| 57:13.90 | mikebledsoe | Me here. |
| 57:22.77 | Max Shank | Distinction rather than a collapse distinction between work rest and play. You're going to get a way way better result with way less effort I mean who would not want to spend less time working but get better results like what? what seems more obvious than that. |
| 57:41.56 | mikebledsoe | Yep. |
| 57:42.70 | Max Shank | But if you don't draw those boundaries. It's basically impossible and you know you can't worry I mean this is easier said than done right? because we're the most social emotional creatures ever. You can't worry what it's going to do for someone else like breaking your own boundaries to make someone else feel better. Is not doing them a favor. It's just willingly participating in your own energy vampireism essentially and I really like the the lore around vampires because it perfectly describes energy vampires too. So with. |
| 58:16.42 | mikebledsoe | Oh. |
| 58:20.20 | Max Shank | Real vampire I was going to say real vam I mean maybe there are who knows with real vampires or the story. They can't come in your house and let see you invite them in with energy vampires. It's exactly the same thing you don't have to let anyone suck any of your energy. Unless you deliberately and directly invite them in so it's very important to just realize how much power is in the word. No. |
| 58:47.28 | mikebledsoe | Someone say it's the most powerful word there is. |
| 58:52.71 | Max Shank | Um I would agree maybe maybe yes Also but yes and yes implies that no is an option. |
| 58:59.29 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, can't have a yes without a no as a possibility I Want to mention in summary I Do want to mention 2 tools that I use that that you made me think of ah is I use a tool called Marduck which is ah. Have my entire business put in there. It's it's ah it's ah the most advanced task management system ever seen I'm go. Ah I'm a Beta user for it. My buddy designed it. We're gonna be rolling that out to my clients. But also if anyone wants to use this. Ah. This software that basically you put your entire business in it and then it tracks how long you're doing certain tasks and helps you focus I would say I've been using it for five months my productivity if I to guess 3 X I work less and get way more done. Um, and I enjoy my work so he he's figured out a way to gamify ah work. So you program it around your business and then it gamifies it and there's rewards and all sorts of stuff. Um, but what I do is with the marduck system when I start a task I hit play and it starts tracking my time. When I hit stop and when when I hit play it closes down all the other things that I need to do that Day. So I'm not getting distracted when I hit stop I Then it prompts me to put in what I did like like a little summary of what I completed and then the difficulty of. On on a number scale of how difficult that task was for me to complete and ah that helps me, um, check you know I'm consciously choosing to do a task and then I I complete it and then I do a check In. Um. |
| 01:00:28.66 | Max Shank | Um, um, how can. |
| 01:00:44.59 | mikebledsoe | And then so I use that tool in combination with another tool called Brain Dot fm. |
| 01:00:46.44 | Max Shank | We should. We should get Marduk to sponsor this episode that was amazing. |
| 01:00:50.94 | mikebledsoe | Oh yeah, thanks. Ah yeah, I'm gonna be slinging some marduck well like I said up. Um I'm giving it to all my clients starting at 2022 ah but anyone even if you're not a client if you want to get access to it. You just dm me on the instagrams. |
| 01:01:00.98 | Max Shank | Cool. |
| 01:01:10.66 | mikebledsoe | And ah, brain fm is the other 1 which is a binaural audio program that basically helps your brain it basically tunes your your brain to the frequency of focus while you're getting stuff done and what I like about brain fm is. There's 30 sixty and ninety minute. Ah. Ah, amount of time you can put on there and so the music just plays helping you focus? Um, and then after thirty sixty or ninety minutes however you program it it stops and that's what I know to take a break and so I noticed that I can do two ninety minute sprints if if I'm working before noon. |
| 01:01:40.48 | Max Shank | Smart. |
| 01:01:47.22 | Max Shank | Who. |
| 01:01:49.70 | mikebledsoe | So I'll do ah a ninety minute sprint and then I'll go make myself some breakfast take a thirty minute break go for a walk come back. Do another ninety minute sprint in the afternoons I like to do sixty minute I can do 1 or 2 sixty minute sprints and then I'm done I'm done for the day and so ah, that's that's been a really great. Those are great tools that have. Help me raise my awareness around what I'm doing how I'm doing it creating boundaries. ah so I'm ah I'm a big fan of I like to say I have very little willpower but I'm hyper ah hyperactive as 1 yeah, but I'm um. |
| 01:02:20.15 | Max Shank | Active. |
| 01:02:25.90 | mikebledsoe | Hyper vigilant around setting up structures and systems to kind of basically I bump into things I go Oh yeah, I'm so it's a stop right now. Otherwise I just keep going. Oh yeah, thank you, Thank you. |
| 01:02:37.74 | Max Shank | That's wisdom. That's knowing yourself and acting accordingly. That's really smart. That's very wise. Yeah, you bet. |
| 01:02:45.68 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, anything else you want to mention in summary for the show. |
| 01:02:49.00 | Max Shank | No love you. Love you guys. Thanks for listening draw good boundaries and don't fight the flow ride the wave. |
| 01:02:59.60 | mikebledsoe | Dope you can find max at ma shk dot com and everything ma shk and then find me at ah mike underscore Bloodso on Instagram and the strongcoach dot com on the interwebs. Thanks y ' all. |
| 01:03:04.90 | Max Shank | That's it. |
| 00:02.80 | mikebledsoe | Fear and goals this comes up a lot lot of people are I talk to people all the time and who are interested in developing themselves and 1 the common things that come up is. Yeah, ask them. You know what's holding you back from you reaching your goals right now and they'll be they'll just say fear or go. Oh well, what are you afraid of and ah and then they go oh I haven't thought that far. Ah. And so we start naming them off. So ah I'm excited to talk about today's topic which max suggested which is fear and goals identifying fierce sateers of goals. So ah, oh oh. |
| 00:53.44 | Max Shank | Spoiler alert there's only 1 fear. |
| 00:58.74 | mikebledsoe | We're not going to tell you what it is until the very end though so you got to stick around. |
| 01:00.38 | Max Shank | Ah, it's not much of a spoiler alert thing. Is it. |
| 01:06.12 | mikebledsoe | Ah, the no no, it's not. |
| 01:10.75 | Max Shank | It'll make sense too. Once I say it people you'd be like oh yeah, of course, there's only 1 thing that we're really afraid of. |
| 01:15.70 | mikebledsoe | Ah, so what we were talking just before we hopped on about people feeling safe and how most people in order to feel safe try to make enough money and if I make enough money then I'll feel safe. You know then I'll be able to live a good life and then ah people make the money and then you know now they they realize that they're responsible for their own health or their own physical protection and so they start investing in that next. Ah, but ah, the way I think about it is you know you can always just decide to feel safe and then because there's always gonna be something to do next in order to feel safer. |
| 02:10.92 | Max Shank | It's kind of the it's there's a parallel between how evolution first ah like prioritized armor in fish like bony. Armored fish and then they just got faster and faster so speed was king and since we have this pretty far out ability if you pardon the pun to see pretty far out into the future. The. Fastest speed ever is preemptive. So once you settle or um, swaddle maybe like 1 fear you like make yourself feel safe. Then you just think forward on to the next 1 and usually the people who make the biggest waves in their lives are the ones who are never satisfied with where they're at they're thinking on to the next thing and on to the next thing and on to the next thing and I mean I was definitely that way. It was always. Onto the next thing and once you get ah 1 thing ah locked in because that's what people really want because we can think forward. We think like okay if I have this much money for retirement then I'm like locked in to safety if I get married then I'm locked in. To a romantic relationship and you know you have all of these ideas. So um, security can span usually does span. Well beyond security in the present moment which is really just a reflexive reaction to danger rather than fear which is a preemptive prediction of what could happen in the future. |
| 04:09.93 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, because it's not true until it happens so fear fear is and is born out of imagination. |
| 04:15.88 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 04:21.58 | Max Shank | Right? And it's effective to preempt um situations like so a squirrel saving nuts for the winter is making a prediction of how many extra nuts to save up. In order to go through the season where there aren't going to be any growing on the trees. So. It's effective and that's like ah I heard this term the other day about attention Deficit which is a warrior. |
| 04:42.43 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, the. |
| 04:56.47 | Max Shank | In a farmer's world or maybe a hunter in a farmer's world and I thought that was I thought that was 1 of the best ways I've ever heard it described it just says so much you know a lot of folks who would be amazing hunters like as soon as they see the tracks. |
| 05:03.69 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that makes sense. |
| 05:14.99 | Max Shank | They're on it and they won't let go of that track and they'll just grind through and push and keep walking and keep going and hunt that thing down Maybe don't have the patience to hoe a field and like plant a bunch of seeds and you know plan that whole thing ahead. |
| 05:26.63 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 05:32.49 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah, not projecting as far out into the future I was listening to a guy guy named Matt john vervacki he did a a youtube series of sixty 1 hour lectures and I forget. |
| 05:33.78 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 05:51.27 | mikebledsoe | Something about the meaning crisis is the name of the lectures and he talks about just the word project comes from projectile. Yeah, like the the hunters when they got they evolved far enough to start being able to go. |
| 05:52.89 | Max Shank | A. Project. |
| 06:11.27 | mikebledsoe | This target is moving in this direction at this speed and I must predict where it'll be as I let go of my spear and project it into the future because once you let it go. You know it's gonna land in the future and I was really. |
| 06:21.30 | Max Shank | Who. |
| 06:27.88 | Max Shank | Love it. |
| 06:30.79 | mikebledsoe | Really really fascinating as he said was saying that I go and the word project is used in business to with a series of targets in which you're going to hit to accomplish a specific goal at the end and I go man. This is so brilliant So he's so spot on. So. |
| 06:42.60 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 06:50.32 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, hearing you talk about? ah yeah, projecting in the future made me think of that. |
| 06:57.21 | Max Shank | That's 1 of the most challenging things for people today I think is to be an active participant in selecting their time period that they're going to be in so you have ah the crystal ball which is projecting forward. You have the. |
| 07:07.55 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 07:14.84 | Max Shank | Book on the wall which is looking backward and then you have Baba ramdas be here now and then the future and the past just dissolve into this moment and if you're able to, um. Consciously instead of compulsively choose where you are then you're essentially some sort of superhuman. You know if you're constantly in the future. You're probably going to be in a very anxious individual. And you're not going to experience a lot of peace but you may. |
| 07:50.10 | mikebledsoe | Or or you could be just ah, a lazy daydreamer if you if it's a positive if if you're thinking about things positive in the future all time. But you're not taking the action in order to make it happen right now. That's not gonna you know. |
| 07:54.81 | Max Shank | Yeah, that's true. |
| 08:05.43 | Max Shank | Right? I I think dwelling. Yeah well, it's ah anxiety is like a fixation or you're stuck in the future depression is usually you're stuck in the past |
| 08:07.65 | mikebledsoe | That happened I seen that happen a lot too. But most people get anxiety. |
| 08:22.22 | mikebledsoe | Okay, in. |
| 08:24.78 | Max Shank | And everything's a gradient right? Everything is absolutely relative to your experience which is a funny term that I like absolutely relative but I like the I like the I never thought of ah project and projectile which is funny because it reminds me of. |
| 08:39.26 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 08:43.46 | Max Shank | 1 of my favorite scenes in any movie ever which is in 2001 a space odyssey where the Monkey man learns that when he's holding the bone in his hand and when it falls it creates like a bigger impact in the pile of bones. |
| 08:47.94 | mikebledsoe | Where. |
| 09:03.20 | Max Shank | And it's this dawning realization that there's an extension of his ah will let's say through the bone that increases the level of Impact. So What's funny is um. Like chimpanzees ah fight a lot. A lot is also relative. But what's interesting is when they're doing ah a display of a oh yeah. |
| 09:29.66 | mikebledsoe | They have full on wars between the tribes. Not not just 2 champions chimpanzees fighting. There's like a tribe over here in a tribe over there and they go to war and they'll eat each other or bit bit cannibalistic as well. |
| 09:37.83 | Max Shank | Ah, it's gnarly. Ah, oh yeah, yeah, cannibalism is not reserved for humans Apparently a lot of animals do that and not just the female. |
| 09:49.49 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 09:56.87 | Max Shank | Eating the male after mating which is crazy common too. Anyway, my point if I. |
| 10:04.16 | mikebledsoe | Thank God I'm human that's not and that's not I might have to be afraid of my girlfriend eating me. |
| 10:08.91 | Max Shank | No, no, no, they don't they don't like literally eat you. They just ah and I I'll save that for I won't offend our last 3 female listeners. |
| 10:16.58 | mikebledsoe | Ah, you. |
| 10:23.52 | Max Shank | Ah, ah so anyway, the chimps they during displays of dominance will pick up huge tree branches and swing them around like they can hold it in their hand. They'll swing and they'll It'll be like Holy Lord that. |
| 10:34.81 | mikebledsoe | So a. |
| 10:42.88 | Max Shank | Monkey that chimp just swung a fucking like 4 by 4 sized cylindrical log through the air with insane speed but they never hit each other with a stick that. Amount that amount of extension. Ah cerebrally doesn't exist for them. So even to go from hand to stick to projectile is a huge ah extension of your will. |
| 11:20.67 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, someone call that expansion of consciousness. So yeah man I'm not the guy who wrote power versus force remember him what's his name man he had a quote which is ah. |
| 11:20.94 | Max Shank | Into the future. |
| 11:28.70 | Max Shank | It's a good word for it. Yeah. |
| 11:33.21 | Max Shank | No. |
| 11:39.94 | mikebledsoe | Ah, there is no passage of time. There's only an expansion of consciousness and something to it's so it's a good. It's a good meditative quote to consider I've found. Ah so I'm curious since we're gonna be talking about. |
| 11:43.40 | Max Shank | So. |
| 11:50.81 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 11:58.83 | mikebledsoe | Talk about fears and goals and you and I are both 1 of the reasons we do. This show is because you and I have both accomplished a lot of goals. You know, a lot of people set out to do things and they don't do them I know that you and I have both set out to accomplish goals failed out them. We've also succeeded at them and then realized we didn't want the thing that we thought we wanted but it was good that we accomplished the goal so we could learn that we didn't care about that. Ah, and so we've gotten very good at reaching goals which means that we've also. Been able to overcome a lot of fears in the process. So I'm curious for you. You know I'd love to know what your biggest fear was as you were developing as a young man and you were trying to achieve goals. What was the thing that. |
| 12:50.39 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 12:55.65 | mikebledsoe | I know what mine is I'm wondering if you you know, but that there was like 1 primary fear that that held you back maybe in business or in athletics or something like that. |
| 13:04.80 | Max Shank | I mean I actually just wrote them all down the other day um, trying to trace him back as far as I can't for me, it was ah the fear that I I wouldn't be like physically safe. Um. |
| 13:09.32 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 13:19.60 | mikebledsoe | Um. |
| 13:23.19 | Max Shank | The other thing was ah, not not being good enough I think these are really common fears but they'll relate back to the same ah single point of fear which is ah the death of the ego. The reason people fear their physical death is because they fear the the death of the Ego. So when people are afraid of Judgment. They're afraid of what that means for their story for their ego when they're so everything relates back to. |
| 13:53.14 | mikebledsoe | So that. |
| 13:59.60 | Max Shank | Can you move past the fear that the story of you will be harmed in some way so 1 of the things I've noticed is that. |
| 14:10.22 | mikebledsoe | What do? what do we want to do we want to find ego sounds like you've given it somewhat of a definition and I know that when people hear ego. There's cool I like that I. |
| 14:19.26 | Max Shank | Let's just call it. The story. The story of you Yeah, your identity your identity your self image story of you So when you're thinking about like how do I protect myself physically. Yes, That's a natural instinct and it's also because the thought of not existing is like really scary to the ego I mean the reason people want to be good. Parents is they want to be thought of as good parents and they want to set up their loved ones. But it all it all relates back. To the fear of the identity being tarnished and that leads back to ancient cultures where it was thought of as way worse to be exiled than it was to be killed and you can even look at ah. Less ancient cultures where you know they have hara kiri where if you you know, shame your family or shame yourself you you disembowel yourself with a samurai sword and your buddy will chop off your head as an act of Mercy. After that just to make sure the job gets done and that's a way that you don't bring shame to your entire lineage so that multigenerational or intergenerational ego or identity is preserved even though the life. Of the physical body of that individual. Um, you know was caught in momentary shame and that's how you sort of save Face. So. It's really interesting to see what lengths human beings will go to to preserve. Story They'll kill themselves. They'll kill other people. Um, yeah, you know how dare those other guys believe in a different deity than us We have to kill them. |
| 16:15.63 | mikebledsoe | They'll kill for it. Yeah. |
| 16:31.83 | Max Shank | What. |
| 16:31.85 | mikebledsoe | Ah, you said 1 thing which was you had a fear of not good enough I've always thought about that fear I come across that a lot in coaching and you know it's a good blanket because it that is the phrase. That runs through someone's mind I'm like oh I'm not good enough to curious what you didn't feel like you would like what are the things you were afraid you were not going to be good enough at you weren't going to be good enough to do what. |
| 16:58.59 | Max Shank | Well initially I just struggled really hard with school I mean I almost got held back in several grades I failed Classes. You know I'd be there sitting in the desk just fucking suffering. Thinking back to the old days where I could just run around outside and play with a stick then you know ah not being able to pay attention and so I would get really bad grades and really Behind. On everything so I was just always behind um with regard to what I thought was everybody else learning all these things that you know I was made to believe were were really important. Of course that's not. Not really the case like memorizing factoids and obeying Authority turns out is not actually that useful for overall overall life Success. So. |
| 18:03.85 | mikebledsoe | That's not learning. Yeah well 1 of the things I I tell people early and in my courses is learning has been Misrepresented. You were. You weren't actually taught how to learn you were taught how to I don't I leave the obey part out because I don't want to trigger people too bad, but ah, not early on but why I like that it's it's a gradual trigger system. You know I start with like 1 that they can palate and then. |
| 18:28.49 | Max Shank | You don't want to trigger people too bad. That's funny. |
| 18:40.50 | mikebledsoe | Make it palatable. Yeah. |
| 18:40.53 | Max Shank | It's like Scientology. It's like scientology at first it's like you just got to get your thinking clear and then level 10 is like the evil alien overlord is making you sad and you're like whoa. If you had talked about this on day 1 I might not have stuck around. |
| 18:56.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, Ah, but you know ah in in our education system people are taught that being able to memorize and regurgitate is learning and so they. People become adults and they listen to podcasts and they make notes and they think they're learning but you don't you didn't learn anything until you've actually gotten the benefit of the learning which is you've changed a behavior. So I I like to define learning as Behavior change. |
| 19:29.51 | Max Shank | And. |
| 19:34.38 | mikebledsoe | I Don't want to hear from any of my students that you learn something until you've done it because until then it's still just an idea in just because it came from me doesn't mean it's right, You got to test it out for yourself. |
| 19:43.99 | Max Shank | Oh man I couldn't agree with that more because not only that if you don't apply something even if you did learn it and use it once. It's not going to stay I mean that's 1 of the it's probably an advantage. Um, emotionally that we don't remember every single thing that happened to us all the time if you take in some information and use it 1 time.. It's probably not going to really permeate into your identity or into your life. It's only the stuff that you use with some regularity that stays in the in the tool belt which is what you have access to all the time. |
| 20:28.47 | mikebledsoe | You know all right? So you you fell you weren't gonna be good enough. You didn't do well in school. |
| 20:35.44 | Max Shank | Yeah, so I mean the main thing really was just I didn't feel ah safe financially and you know we got foreclosed on evicted a couple times and bumped around like that. Oh yeah, i'm. |
| 20:48.57 | mikebledsoe | When you were a kid. Oh wow. |
| 20:54.00 | Max Shank | I mean I've had a job straight through since I was twelve I start ah contributing to the the family unit which I actually see as a pretty big advantage in a lot of ways. Um because you just get more experience. |
| 21:05.43 | mikebledsoe | I. |
| 21:13.40 | Max Shank | With the concept of value generation which I think is the absolute most important thing. So It's um, hunger pain and desire are all synonyms. And I think that's 1 of the most important things to understand if you're looking to pursue some goals or overcome some fears fear is like ah a psychological pain almost.. It's a fear of a feeling more than anything else or you're just pre-empting some sort of. |
| 21:43.19 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 21:49.40 | Max Shank | Loss. Um, and ah, it's a feeling right. |
| 21:49.94 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, most of the time when we're avoiding a situation. We're avoiding a conversation. We're avoiding it having a feeling. It's not the situation. It's how it's gonna make us feel and 1 of the things that's created the most freedom for me is. Taking on the you know made it made I've made it a goal to accept love and eventually become comfortable with all feelings that come Up. You know so that the the feelings I used to avoid because I I didn't like them. |
| 22:19.31 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 22:27.50 | mikebledsoe | I Can I can now love sadness. You know where whereas I couldn't love it for I dwelled in guilt where now I just get to be with what I felt guilty about and then move on whereas yeah there was just. |
| 22:33.18 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 22:43.77 | mikebledsoe | Were things I would indulge in and things that I would avoid and it all came from fear and getting to know that that which I'm afraid of Intimately has created a lot of freedom for me. Um I call it emotional freedom but you know that radiates into. |
| 22:45.31 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 22:57.61 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 23:02.36 | mikebledsoe | All my behaviors. My psychological freedom my physical freedom all of that I found that if you if you manage the emotional fear and you become friends with it then it loses its power. |
| 23:05.35 | Max Shank | M. |
| 23:17.72 | Max Shank | I would have to agree I mean and as you well know a lot of our fears and pains are psychological but they manifest physically so you may have I mean that's why. |
| 23:31.41 | mikebledsoe | Me. |
| 23:36.27 | Max Shank | Low back pain is 1 of the I think it is still the most common pain even in sedentary workers. So workers comp. It's ah it's full of people with low back pain who don't lift anything and it's not.. It's not just because they're. Weak is because they're sad and that's the that's a funny revelation. Especially if as I did I started approach I started my approach to physical freedom with get as strong and fast as possible. |
| 23:55.38 | mikebledsoe | Um, you know. |
| 24:12.56 | Max Shank | Circled back to oh wait, everybody hurts all the time. So then I became like a ah body mechanic and was like oh well your knee hurts because your hamstrings are weak and your quads are tight now tell me I'm smart or something like that. Ah. And it gets like more and more complex into the nervous system and motor unit recruitment and all this stuff and if you don't respect the reality that psychological pains can manifest as physical pains. Your. Gonna have a really hard time treating that whole self right. |
| 24:51.46 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah I watch people when I when I started getting hip to the emotional um emotional energy and whether it's being whether it's flowing or suppressing. Ah once I got hip to. Oh. |
| 25:05.89 | Max Shank | A. |
| 25:11.11 | mikebledsoe | Ah, like I had some emotional energy moved from my my pelvic region and like I really felt it move like it was a brick that moved out of my body all of a sudden I had flexibility in my hamstrings that flexibility in my hips. My back stopped stopped hurting ah and. |
| 25:20.50 | Max Shank | A. |
| 25:29.81 | mikebledsoe | And I really went down a deep rabbit hole with that and then I would walk into a gym and talking to people and they're having to they're wrapping themselves with bands and doing all sorts of crazy Mobes before they work out and you know I come to find out they have to do that. |
| 25:40.29 | Max Shank | Who. |
| 25:47.75 | mikebledsoe | Every single time before they squat I was like oh you can't just do like a simple five ten minute warm up and then squat without pain. It's like this is not a this is not because you're not wrapping yourself with enough bands. This is. |
| 25:48.50 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 26:02.50 | Max Shank | Just need a few more bands I think it's just a couple more you're like 3 bands away. |
| 26:06.26 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, yeah, was like it's like wow you know, um and I remember bringing this up years ago when it was first dawning on me and you know having a popular podcast and talking about it. Publicly people are like mike's lost his fucking mind. |
| 26:24.42 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 26:26.23 | mikebledsoe | And I was like okay I think now I think it took me some time to learn how to explain it better. But I also think that generally our culture is has become more hit to these ideas as well. Not everybody but I would say. |
| 26:41.16 | Max Shank | Now some. |
| 26:44.76 | mikebledsoe | More I come across more people that that immediately agree with that I get less pushback than I used to. |
| 26:50.19 | Max Shank | Well, the purpose of pain is to get you back into safety. The the reason for pain is it's just an action signal but it's not specific. So if you feel a pain in your knee. That's not necessarily where. The problem is it's just saying do something different. That's all very nonspecific, but the purpose is is to protect you and protection and safety and security. Once again, they're all synonyms like we're all you know we're framing. |
| 27:11.76 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 27:28.34 | Max Shank | These fundamental realities of life as slightly different things. Hunger pain desire safety security. They're all very very similar so you have to I you don't have to but I I think it's helpful to recognize which are which are synonyms. So you can sort of start grouping them together and discover what the underlying sensation is right? and it's like we talked about a few episodes ago. Ah with the 3 levels of your brain you have to secure the lizard love the mammal so you can free the wizard which is the. Reptilian mamma alienlian and neocortex and if you are just living in a state of fight or flight which you can send yourself there just by watching the news. It's game over you'll just be constantly like I'm I'm afraid and you have no ability. To use your Neocortex. It's like an abused dog who just bites anyone that comes close. |
| 28:35.76 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 28:36.67 | Max Shank | Ah, it's ah it's It's a tricky thing I mean we're really emotional creatures but that's also our strength because we want to share um the bounty we want to share the load. We want to alleviate the suffering of our of our fellows. Um. You know Lizards don't really do that I'm not trying to like ah bad mouth Lizards or something like that I think Lizards are great creatures as Well. It's just a different strategy. |
| 29:05.34 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, you believe in the lizard people. |
| 29:10.14 | Max Shank | I Believe some people exhibit lizard-like characteristics. but but I also usually can see different traces of animals in people. |
| 29:22.78 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 29:25.26 | Max Shank | Like I'll see someone be like oh that person looks kind of giraffe-like or that person looks kind of bird-like you know what? I mean. |
| 29:29.60 | mikebledsoe | Ah, ah yeah, there's something about women who wear like pointing masks that like I see a woman with a pointing mask at the grocery store and I want to get I Just want to go? Ah, ah. |
| 29:38.16 | Max Shank | Ah, that's that's a bird. |
| 29:47.73 | Max Shank | Well I think in ah the U K they I think in the Uk they're called Birds ladies. Yeah, yeah, these birds were down at the pub that sounds right? doesn't it. |
| 29:47.86 | mikebledsoe | No woman wants to be called a bird I don't think what are women oh really? Ah well I well I know that. What was that tv show always sunny in Philadelphia they ah, they always called the woman in that show a bird and she hated it. D. |
| 30:11.49 | Max Shank | D yeah, yeah, she hate it. Yeah of course. Well, that's America it's different in ah in the u k you can also walk up to a guy on the street and say hey can I bum a fag and that's it's a totally normal thing to say. But if you said that here. People would find that offensive it means can I borrow can I borrow or have a cigarette That's what that means. |
| 30:29.43 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, or you might yeah exactly I'm glad you cleared that up that that might have eluded some people. Ah 1 of the things I the pain like having knee pain may not meet. Mean and it usually doesn't mean there's a problem with your knee it it means there's a problem somewhere else, but it is a sign to change Behavior. It says hey let's do something different. Um, 1 of the things that I I ah try to be. |
| 30:54.36 | Max Shank | Um, yeah action. Signal. |
| 31:07.70 | mikebledsoe | Because again, if you're in this game very long. You realize that any pain in your body probably isn't because of that thing Specifically it can be but the best way to be is is to be curious and to start asking like hey what should I be what have I been doing that might be contributing to this. |
| 31:15.33 | Max Shank | And. |
| 31:26.55 | mikebledsoe | All right? do experiments to try to change it. Ah because really it comes down to you're you're responsible for your own health and you know, Ah, ah someone else can help you figure some things out and start pointing in the right direction. But. It's really up to you at the end of the day to figure out what's actually going on with you. |
| 31:48.13 | Max Shank | That's ah, that's a super wise and powerful tool is curiosity I Even think the word curiosity is probably as close as you can get to a medicine for fear. Because Fear is also about the unknown rather than the known like you're afraid of what might happen to my story. Oh My God What if people hate me because once you know for sure that people will hate you. It's not really like a ah. You're not afraid of it Anymore. You're just like oh well,, That's what's going to happen Now. So Curiosity is also you don't know what's going on. So. It's also the unknown but it's just in a positive light. So you're bringing light to the unknown instead of. |
| 32:25.70 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 32:43.26 | Max Shank | Being stuck hiding from the darkness. So I think that that is probably if there's a big takeaway about Fear. It's that curiosity is the opposite it. It puts you right back into Neocortex it puts you right back into. Conscious takes you right out of compulsive fear spiral so fear and and curiosity. Um, you know you'll of course be afraid of things and really afraid of um. What may come to be right because you don't know exactly what it will be but curiosity same unknown but a totally different frame of reference. So that's that's huge I think of goals. |
| 33:29.42 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 33:40.20 | Max Shank | And I think of action. So I always think of whenever I create a message of some kind I always start with what do I want who to do exactly. So. |
| 33:54.40 | mikebledsoe | Hey. |
| 33:56.51 | Max Shank | Who am I talking to and what exactly do I want them to do ah quite frankly, ah the time where I just write something so people read it is is long gone and it's not enough for me to get off my ass and do it's it just doesn't feel worth it. Which is exactly what I want to talk about now which is the pain to prospect ratio. It's an estimate that we make consciously or unconsciously about is the juice worth the squeeze and people. |
| 34:27.53 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 34:31.63 | Max Shank | Especially with exercise are very bad at estimating they think oh it's it's just not worth it to do ah a ten minute exercise session or movement session because they're ah it's too much. Yeah, too much effort. Not enough payoff. Right? The pain is too great. The cost is too high. The benefit won't be high enough. So. |
| 34:51.90 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah I don't think they realize the accumulatative effect people have a hard time projecting positivity in the future. |
| 34:59.40 | Max Shank | What? Well you have to be able to defer gratification because in the short term exercise makes you weaker. Ah it depends what you do I mean there's ah. |
| 35:09.67 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 35:18.33 | Max Shank | Like a curve right? If you do a little bit of exercise. It makes you much stronger that day. But if you do a lot. It makes you much weaker that day and it's probably you know like most things kind of Bell curvish. But you have to be able to see long-term and defer gratification till later just like. Investing just like working on a long project. Um, some people maybe write books in 1 day but that's probably not very many people. The reason more people don't is you have to string a lot of. |
| 35:46.62 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 35:53.37 | Max Shank | Writing sessions together and in my case, the hardest part for sure is editing writing is so easy editing is is way ah way tougher I think ah but in order to do anything you have to meet a catalyst. |
| 35:57.67 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, yeah. |
| 36:13.30 | Max Shank | In your pain to prospect ratio which so I have a pretty weird motivational technique which is I don't I don't I'm not a good cheerleader but I just kind of point out the obvious and say look you know you can do this. And if you don't it just means you don't think it's worth it yet. That's all that's okay, like if you write in your journal for fifteen minutes every morning for 2 weeks. It means that you're probably taking this um mental practice that we're trying seriously and then. At the end of those 2 weeks. We'll have an idea of whether or not this is ah giving you some benefit and what you've gotten out of it and here are some tools of course like um, fill in the blanks type of stuff can be really beneficial for help. Ah I call it ah mind mining. |
| 37:08.60 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 37:09.20 | Max Shank | Like you're a minor with like a little pickaxe so you help people ah mind their minds and the reality is ah hunger is the motivator hunger pain desire all synonyms ambition same thing I didn't even really consider the fact. That I named my gym ambition athletics which is basically a synonym for desire athletics and is just so funny like thinking back into it and it is the desire to achieve something and you need to experience some sort of pain. With the status quo even if it seems like very love-based like I want to I I Love the I Love Children. So I Want to save the children. It's like yeah you want you feel pain right now that they are suffering. Basically so everything relates back. To whether or not the pain to prospect ratio prospect being like what you predict the outcome will be is sufficient of a catalyst for your action. That's true for basically everything. |
| 38:17.60 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah I agree with that Always always calculating the um yeah tote. |
| 38:28.48 | Max Shank | Um, even unconsciously. |
| 38:34.79 | mikebledsoe | Probably mostly unconsciously. |
| 38:36.90 | Max Shank | Like oh I'm I'm uncomfortable. So I'm going to eat a donut. It's worth it. It's it's only 10 feet away that's 10 steps eat a donut that's well worth it. But the. |
| 38:40.86 | mikebledsoe | Exactly yeah. Yeah I don't I don't get this much anymore. But I've had people I'd be somewhere and they're like you want to eat this food and we go now and then it's usually somebody overweight who goes he goes. Oh you're you're 1 of those people that punish yourself with. |
| 38:59.14 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 39:09.58 | mikebledsoe | I'm like I go no I just I realized that if I eat this in an hour I'm gonna feel like shit and if I eat this repeatedly I'm gonna just my whole body's gonna feel like shit not in the five minutes while I'm eating it. But. Every other moment after that's worse so like it's just and it's funny. How like I just remember people trying to guilt me into joining them and making poor decisions that way. Yeah, yeah. |
| 39:41.60 | Max Shank | It's like drinking. It's like drinking drinking alcohol. The trick though is we. |
| 39:46.35 | mikebledsoe | Just have a beard just relax. |
| 39:49.61 | Max Shank | I Remember when I was in my early twenty s we used to show how tough we were by having a little competition to see who could drink the most poison. |
| 39:59.38 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah, you too? Yeah, but. |
| 40:02.97 | Max Shank | Ah, oh yeah, I was the toughest guy there was and then I was vomiting in the gutter where I then passed out So I mean have you ever like I think isn't there like a euphemism for you know my life was in the gutter I hit like rock. I've literally like woken up in a gutter before that's not a proud moment but the problem is yeah that means yeah I have good friends with you at least that's silver Lining. That's good. |
| 40:23.99 | mikebledsoe | No, no yeah I've I've been peeled off the sidewalk and carried home. Yeah I did I did they didn't leave me behind. |
| 40:38.94 | Max Shank | I would just wander off. Ah, um, the problem that most people have though is not only is there estimate of the effort required ah sort of fallacious and driven. By the law of least action which is we always want to preserve energy. But we also have no clue as to what all the variables are you know algebra and math is usually very clean like 2 x equals y plus four. You know, even that is like fairly cut and dry. But when you start thinking about all of the variables involved with whether you decide to exercise in the morning and tackle a writing project for the next sixty days. There are so many variables that you can't imagine. Another example is. Ah, investing like how do you choose what company to invest into and you know 1 of my absolutely closest friends for a really long time is really, he's like so sharp and we talk about investing and you know i. Kind of like to ah go with it and I talk about the ah fundamentals because that's all I know about businesses I don't study ah like business numbers and sales and all that stuff I just think about what? ah. Value is being provided essentially and I think about like the human aspect of it but in order to look through. Let's say even a thousand companies and pick your favorite 10 is so crazy. Because there are so many variables that you're not aware of so you take that level of complexity and you apply it to your own life. The difference in the like probability of how your day will go of starting with. You you know thirty minutes of exercise or thirty minutes of tiktok is pretty dramatic but you can't possibly know what you're going to experience in both of those situations right? So the variables get way too complicated to have. Ah. |
| 42:59.75 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 43:06.86 | Max Shank | Perfect prediction so you can't expect to be perfectly ready and that's why you know I I like ah Perfectionism is a sophisticated form of procrastination and so you'll. You'll try to get all the variables lined up but just the understanding that nobody ever gets all the variables lined up and usually the people who do the most things are the ones who go way before they're Ready. It's like they used to frustrate me a lot because. |
| 43:40.16 | mikebledsoe | M. |
| 43:45.15 | Max Shank | Ah, used to have you ever been envious. Anyone anyone out there. Envy is is really hard to not to not be envious, especially when you're young and you fancy yourself smart and you see. |
| 43:50.58 | mikebledsoe | Ah, oh yeah. |
| 44:04.50 | Max Shank | Very very successful. Successful people who you recognize as very very dumb at what they're doing and it's not a personal attack. It's just Wow people are are buying this line of B S. Are you kidding me like this is a. How is this guy so popular like and and it's because they just go go go way before they're ready and so there's ah, there's a balance there with the the craftsmanship of. |
| 44:22.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 44:41.20 | Max Shank | Refining that skill and there's also that advantage to being a little too ignorant to know that you're not ready and just going anyway. So finding finding that good balance is. |
| 44:53.96 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 45:00.10 | Max Shank | Is quite helpful and a lot of the stuff that I've done actually I went before before it was ready and it worked out really well. |
| 45:08.44 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, I think that's 1 of the things that have helped me achieve the amount of success I have is I I was a little delusional when I was younger about how good I was gonna be at something i. Just didn't think about all the potential variables I Just go oh I had like this this faith that I would figure it out like oh yeah, I know what I'm doing and then I get into it and I realized that there was a million things I had no idea about that I now have to figure Out. Um. So I think a little bit of delusion early on was helpful that delusion is faded I now know that I don't know a bunch of shit. But 1 thing I've learned is that I have the ability to jump into a project and I'll figure it out I don't I don't care what it is. |
| 46:01.87 | Max Shank | Will you need that faith. |
| 46:03.53 | mikebledsoe | So as long as I want it if I want it I go you know what? I'll figure it out I mean my whole thing is is I will figure it out or I won't either way I've got to try and if I don't then I'll just move on to something else because there's the the micro in the macro. |
| 46:15.95 | Max Shank | Um, right. |
| 46:22.10 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 46:23.47 | mikebledsoe | Like oh I want to go up this 1 thing I go after I go Wow The cost of reaching that goal is actually not worth it to me anymore now that I'm now that I'm aware of all the variables and like you know what? I'm okay to walk away from this because I actually desire something else more that I'm willing to to sacrifice. Right now in order to get there. So It's ah that's really been beneficial for me and I do see a lot of people get caught up in that this like fear of they talk about fear of failure and there's a fear that ah they're not gonna get not get it right? I agree and that's. |
| 46:58.37 | Max Shank | It's fear of shame. |
| 47:02.63 | mikebledsoe | That's actually that was ah my biggest fear when I started in my business was I didn't want to look like I tried hard and then like like I either had to act like in the beginning I act like I I didn't care ah because if it didn't go well and I. |
| 47:05.36 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 47:22.50 | mikebledsoe | And I looked like I didn't care. It didn't mean anything about me. But if I yeah but if I try hard and I fail that means I'm dumb you know and and and for me like my my big 1 of my biggest fears was like being seen as as. |
| 47:25.70 | Max Shank | Isn't that funny totally or bad. Yeah. |
| 47:41.67 | mikebledsoe | Dumb because I deep downwn believe that I believe that I was dumb when I was a kid and so I had to overcome that so I had to prove to the world that I that I was smart I was trying to prove to myself that I could be smart and but yeah, 1 of my biggest fears was was looking dumb. |
| 47:41.69 | Max Shank | Um, same. |
| 47:57.56 | Max Shank | I feel that 1 |
| 48:00.78 | mikebledsoe | And I didn't want to look like I tried hard. Um, but even then like you know, ah raising my prices in my gym to be at ah at the appropriate price was very difficult because I was afraid of what. People who I was going to charge that amount of money to were going to think of me for charging that I didn't want to be seen as greedy so I didn't want to be seen as dumb I didn't want to be seen as greedy. It's Funny. He's like oh I don't want to fail but I'm also don't want to be seen as a greedy person. |
| 48:22.66 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 48:36.25 | mikebledsoe | And then there's this box of like limitation around success that gets they gets built. It's like okay well I don't want to be seeing this greedy I don't want to fail and look dumb. It's like Wow What do you get? where do you go from there you there's very little to go from there. |
| 48:38.98 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 48:52.40 | Max Shank | There's no wiggle room whatsoever. |
| 48:54.24 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and so there's these conditions that we put on our in place because of yeah that that perceived shame that people will shame us and then we'll feel guilty and ah yeah, yeah. |
| 49:06.56 | Max Shank | You'll feel less. You'll feel less than and it goes back to that same eat. It goes back to that same like your your story is tarnished it always comes back to that judgment shame and shame I've heard is the single most. |
| 49:11.63 | mikebledsoe | Loss. |
| 49:15.65 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 49:24.18 | Max Shank | Ah, powerful visceral emotion. There is which you would imagine that our evolution would select for that based on our dependence of cooperating together in groups you touched on something though which is like. |
| 49:35.96 | mikebledsoe | Right? right? definitely. |
| 49:43.68 | Max Shank | You just had to believe you just had to have faith that it would work and you need that because there's no guarantee that anything will work. You know, even someone? Um I I Really like to have all my ducks in a row. Ah before I start something. Try to limit the risk as much as possible but you can't take any action without having faith and I'm sure that's part of the reason that religion has sprouted so much is in order to have that. Forward thinking of like this is what the future could hold and understand that there are so many possibilities it can be an advantage to have faith that everything will go well or or perhaps that a um, a deity of some kind. |
| 50:34.70 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 50:41.56 | Max Shank | Has ah a grander plan where it does all work out. Well I mean that's that's ah, quite an interesting way of assuaging those fears. |
| 50:50.70 | mikebledsoe | Well, ah, human, they they did a study and humans generally think that the future will be better than the present and that's that's another challenge to investing either. You know in. And exercise in health or investing money in something is because people believe that they're gonna make more money in the future. They're gonna they believe they generally believe things would just be Better. There's an um overall optimistic thing going on. Not for everybody. But for. Vast majority of people. They they do think things that they believe that things progress to be better in the future and which could be true I think it generally is true. But when yeah, it's very relative and. |
| 51:41.72 | Max Shank | Bet Better is super relative right. |
| 51:46.49 | mikebledsoe | People Um, a lot of times because they believe things are going to get better. No matter what they don't take action. They don't do what it takes for things to be better, especially and is where religion can get funny a lot of times because. |
| 51:58.26 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 52:05.00 | mikebledsoe | There's something outside of themselves that is going to save them. There's something outside of themselves that's going to make it better and a ah lot of people I think get caught up in that belief structure and then just fall into inaction. |
| 52:20.52 | Max Shank | A. |
| 52:21.86 | mikebledsoe | Or don't see the role that they're going to play in creating that future. |
| 52:25.61 | Max Shank | Yeah, sometimes I get caught in exactly the opposite which is I predict all of the horrible stuff I predict based on ah all of the horrible stuff I've been made aware of and I just assume that ah me doing. |
| 52:30.96 | mikebledsoe | And he. |
| 52:44.22 | Max Shank | Anything will be like trying to empty the ocean with a teaspoon and it won't really make a difference Anyway, I'm like hey everybody it's ah time for your morning Mobility Exercises Meanwhile there's like you know all kinds of lobbying going on and all of the you know. |
| 52:49.39 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah. |
| 53:03.40 | Max Shank | Whatever you know I don't want to get too far down that road. But I think ah safe to say that we do a lot of stuff exactly the worst way possible in our current setup of organizing large groups of people so thinking that what you do will have some sort of. Benefit that is meaningful to you so that belief that faith has to um, be the catalyst for any action and that's that pain to prospect ratio. |
| 53:33.10 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I feel good with this anything else. You want to add. |
| 53:39.82 | Max Shank | Ah, so we talked about ah goals and fears primarily and then we talked a little bit about sticks and stones which was pretty fun in the beginning I think with regard to fear. It's important to understand that it's just your attached to your story and all of the um, the most wise stuff that I've read from throughout the Millennia of people trying to feel more at peace in their. Selves and hearts is about ah connection without attachment which is such a trite thing to say it seems so simple right? But it's actually extremely difficult to connect with everything around you without getting too attached and latched onto it. And so fear man we didn't even talk about ah like feeling physically safe and you know like having ah some food and some marshall capabilities. But yeah, if you can accept. The impermanence of your story. You won't be enslaved by the fear of tarnishing that story like the shame or the failures I mean I really like the phrase The only failure is to not try at all. |
| 55:12.41 | mikebledsoe | You know? ah. |
| 55:15.40 | Max Shank | Because you can I think you probably would agree that part of your success just like for mine is just that I simply tried lots of things and I you don't know which ones are going to work and I Also. Didn't get stuck in the sunk cost fallacy where you keep pouring more energy into something just because you've already poured a lot into it. You know it's It's good. You you stop doing that thing and you try something else. So It's good to try lots of things because you don't know just like investing. |
| 55:38.78 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 55:50.38 | Max Shank | Ah, Diversification. You don't know which 1 Ne's going to be awesome. But if you have 10 that have a really good chance of being awesome then hey that's pretty good I mean I'm not I can't predict the future. So yeah, there's that which is. You have to accept the impermanence of the story and then everything else is sort of a domino effect after that and. |
| 56:13.89 | mikebledsoe | I Like the impermanence of this story because after you die your story is I mean it. It contributes to the cultural story and gets passed down anceually. But. |
| 56:26.26 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 56:31.15 | mikebledsoe | No stories are ever told accurately. So just the the knowledge the knowledge that your story is going to be skewed no matter what? ah to me brings a lot of levity because I know that other people are going to write my story about me. |
| 56:33.33 | Max Shank | Now. |
| 56:50.43 | mikebledsoe | From their perspective. However, they want It's none of my none of my business really and once I stop making my business and how other people are gonna interpret my story. The easier got to just live out my own life The way I want to live it and yeah like this weekend I had my. |
| 56:51.63 | Max Shank | Um, right? yeah. |
| 57:09.88 | mikebledsoe | My birthday my birthday party and people were telling me all sorts of amazing things about me but that's not even the story I would tell about myself and and so it's It's a good demonstration of yeah that I think that this. |
| 57:18.44 | Max Shank | Yeah, of course, not. |
| 57:29.61 | mikebledsoe | The story we're telling about ourselves is is greater than what we think other people might tell a story about us. |
| 57:37.92 | Max Shank | Yeah, and subconsciously your self-image is going to guide your behaviors. Maybe even more than you're conscious. So if like subconsciously you think you're dumb and lazy. No amount of like trying to grit through it is actually going to. |
| 57:56.47 | mikebledsoe | Your yeah your behaviors may change it create a difference in your life. But that story is going to remain the same. |
| 57:56.84 | Max Shank | Help you do that So you have to. |
| 58:03.14 | Max Shank | Right? So that's why I think at least for me what makes the um, most sense is to not be too attached to any story because I think you you mostly just are what you do and the more attached I am to a certain thing. The. |
| 58:12.34 | mikebledsoe | On there. |
| 58:22.31 | Max Shank | The less the flow of energy is through me as like a conduit and so with regard to fear you are accepting your physical death and your the death of your story and and also the fact that your story could be. |
| 58:24.43 | mikebledsoe | Move. Ah. |
| 58:41.11 | Max Shank | Completely tarnished I mean Oedipus did a lot of great things. But no 1 remembers What those things are because he killed his dad and fucked his mom and that's all we know about oedipus right. So with like if you let go of the story thing then you won't fear Shame. You won't fear Judgment. It's like a top-down type of effect if you accept the impermanence and then with regard to goals. It allows you to seek goals outside of your um, extrinsic judgment of those things like a lot of people become doctors and lawyers not because they want to. Be a doctor or a lawyer just because it's ah it's an esteemed position. It's a position of power and wealth. They don't really want that they just want to be seen as Good. So if you can get your self out of the way you'll be able to choose a goal. |
| 59:41.50 | mikebledsoe | Right. |
| 59:46.57 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 59:57.46 | Max Shank | That is more conducive to what you really feel and I may have even mentioned this in a show before I'm sure I have but ah simon sinek has his it starts with why and that's good and james clear has his habit formation about. Starts with who like you choose your identity and then everything comes from there which is also good. It's kind of in line with the psycho cybernetics idea and then I just think about what I would want to have done if I could get no credit. If I had to be totally anonymous and that seems to be the truest ah goals that I have it takes into consideration. What my strengths and weaknesses are and it takes the um it takes the ego kind of out of the. Out of the equation a little bit and it helps me get more aligned to what I actually think is important versus what is just another ah power play like ah people will people will love me more and then my story will be vast and then I will have a. |
| 01:01:04.15 | mikebledsoe | Sir. |
| 01:01:13.27 | Max Shank | Gigantic tombstone. No I'll have a mausoleum that's when the ego goes beyond your physical life like the last thing I fucking want is gigantic mausoleum. It's so ridiculous. Um, hey I'm you know, no offense to the people with. |
| 01:01:32.17 | mikebledsoe | Mauselums. |
| 01:01:32.39 | Max Shank | Mausoleums and stuff like that. It's just it's just not for me. Ah, So there's the relating to fears relating to goals or perhaps a mission very valuable to get other people who feel the same way and then the last thing is just your. Physical safety which is your health your defensive power and um financial health to I would say you have like safety nets. It's like a health physical health physical mental Health Safety net. Ah, social safety net and then financial safety net and. |
| 01:02:13.98 | mikebledsoe | Was the 3 categories of personal development is health wealth and relationships was it. Those are that yeah those are the 3 things that people need to master in order to to live a good life. |
| 01:02:22.27 | Max Shank | That's right, pretty much everything is those. |
| 01:02:33.50 | mikebledsoe | You know I think what we call a good life in this in our current society and those are 3 topics that are not taught in our education system. |
| 01:02:34.18 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 01:02:41.25 | Max Shank | Yeah, the only important things are not taught that's kind of relate. that's that's 1 of the things that makes me feel like I'm trying to empty the ocean with a teaspoon sometimes is I'm like man 12 years we don't even teach the important stuff. It's out of control. But yeah, you're right. |
| 01:02:50.51 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, yeah. |
| 01:03:01.13 | Max Shank | You're right? It's those 3 things and combine that with the acceptance of the impermanence and you'll probably live your fullest life I know like live your best life is like a ah hilarious Hashtag ah, but yeah. But I think that's pretty good. Pretty good way to be there's there's no question reality about having financial. Well-being physical. Well-being and then social wellbeing. |
| 01:03:21.78 | mikebledsoe | I like it. Yeah. |
| 01:03:37.78 | Max Shank | I mean I feel super fortunate that over the past. However long this whole ah business has been going on that I've had close friends and um, plenty of Reserve capital and I live in a place where there's lots of sunshine and I. Went into it very physically healthy and if you're missing 1 or all of those you're going to have a bad time. |
| 01:04:06.15 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, this ah this show to me I'm gonna have my students listen to it because this has ah been packed with a lot of really useful Information. So The the 1 thing I Want to remind everybody is is. Thing that's made the biggest difference for me is learning to be to love and accept those feelings which I tend to avoid and from there a lot of other wisdom has come online for me and ways to live just because of that 1 1 thing That's ah once you get to that point it opens up channels of information which you didn't have access to before. |
| 01:04:56.97 | Max Shank | That's so good because it also opens the door to being compassionate for other people and it also it also closes the door of being envious of other people because you don't know what's going on on the inside right. |
| 01:05:00.49 | mikebledsoe | It does. |
| 01:05:07.56 | mikebledsoe | In here. |
| 01:05:11.29 | Max Shank | We we like to envy like Cherry we like to do cherry pick envy we we like to envy the rock's body you know dwayne the rock johnson that guy but we don't envy like his. |
| 01:05:22.97 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:05:29.14 | Max Shank | Daily routine. Probably we don't envy the fact that I mean who knows what his home life was like but yeah I think if you can love and accept yourself and then still um, you know, not. |
| 01:05:29.30 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 01:05:43.23 | Max Shank | Not feel shame for feeling those emotions but just get curious about them like you sagely pointed out earlier. It really will open the door for a a love-based change of self-image. Rather than a shame-based change of self-image and like I said it also makes you more compassionate and less Envious. So I think y'all I would like to re-listen to this 1 a couple times myself because a lot of things that you and I just say in the flow. Ah, are it makes me want to start jotting down notes and I think. |
| 01:06:21.10 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, I'm um like I added a couple things that I need to write about from this conversation. |
| 01:06:27.00 | Max Shank | Um, well make sure you share those with me I was thinking that part of the reason these conversations are going so well. What is this the ninth episode or something I think ah. |
| 01:06:36.71 | mikebledsoe | Number nine. Yeah. |
| 01:06:42.86 | Max Shank | Ah, 1 of the reason it goes so well is you and I have zero consideration for who said it. We only care that it gets said so we're trying to make the like the result of it. Good. And like I don't care if it was like you said the thing or I said the thing so it's a very um, unencumbered melding of. The experiences that we've had which are unique and then also the experiences we've been exposed to secondhand which is like the reading and the learning from others and I think that's that's what makes a body of work. Great is when you get the. |
| 01:07:32.20 | mikebledsoe | Agreed agreed well brother where can people find you he that he forgot he forgot. |
| 01:07:32.33 | Max Shank | Junk out of the way. Yeah man. |
| 01:07:42.50 | Max Shank | Maxshank Dot Com at Ma shank. Well I was just thinking. Yeah I I was just thinking I'm actually pretty hard to find like physically but on the internet I'm the easiest to find ever if you Google me I'm all over the place. |
| 01:07:47.54 | mikebledsoe | Air. |
| 01:07:54.17 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, same ah hit up at mike blood. So mike underscore bloods on Instagram and the strongcoach dot com if you're a coach and want to do some cool shit all right? Thanks for joining us today. |
| 01:08:12.32 | Max Shank | Love you brother take care. |
| 01:08:12.97 | mikebledsoe | And you max Love you. |
| 00:00.-3 | mikebledsoe | Animal facts. We're gonna talk about masculinity and femininity I hate that femininity How it I'm always always feel like I'm adding an n in there I think I am masculine feminine makes it way easier. |
| 00:10.7 | Max Shank | Femininity masculine and feminine. |
| 00:19.4 | mikebledsoe | So ah, yeah, we discussed talking about this last week because we we began to touch on it a bit so max you wanted to dive into the animal kingdom. Do we want to do that first. Yeah. |
| 00:33.7 | Max Shank | Yeah I just want to do like forty minutes of animal jokes if possible. But I think I think before we kick that off though we should draw attention to the difference between male and female and masculine and feminine. |
| 00:38.5 | mikebledsoe | Right? We'll see. |
| 00:50.9 | mikebledsoe | Um, yep. |
| 00:52.8 | Max Shank | Because those are 2 kind of different things. Um, it's funny I have the whole ah yin yang symbol behind me which is the masculine and feminine and there's ah, a drop of the light in the dark and there's a drop of the dark in the light and I think that's a good. Metaphor for what we're talking about. It's not just I am 1 hundred percent masculine or 1 hundred percent in a female is not going to be 1 hundred percent feminine. It's going to be a gradient and there are going to be different identities and personalities wrapped up into. Where someone is masculine and where someone is feminine and that's going to be instinct or genetics as it's manifested through the nurture through the learned behavior. So. That's why you get some. Guys who are way more feminine and you get some women who are way more masculine and I would probably argue that right now we have more feminine men. And more masculine women than we've probably had maybe ever in the history of humanity. Would you agree. |
| 02:16.5 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, from what I've studied in History. It does seem that that's that is the case I think that the the state of the the amount of wealth that we enjoy the amount of ah time we get to. Have for ourselves that the world is not as demanding. We're not demanded into a role as much. So I think there's a lot more choice. Men aren't necessarily expected to be more masculine and and I think it's worth bringing up the. Different traits of masculinity and and femininity. Ah the you know masculine is is normally the ah the what on yeah there they. |
| 03:02.5 | Max Shank | Light on light on active. |
| 03:13.0 | mikebledsoe | Usually are protectors producers. It's it's about production. It's about what doing penetrating? Ah, it's It's a lot of action and. |
| 03:25.5 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 03:28.3 | mikebledsoe | Thoughts could be thought of as a masculine trait whereas feelings is more feminine and and feminine is and masculine is on the on the giving side whereas feminine is more on the receiving side much more nurture nurturing more Accepting. Ah. The way things are versus trying to change them a masculine feature is yeah yeah, and I think it's an example I Really like to use here is if we're going talk about masculine and Feminine. We can talk about being paternal or Maternal. So. |
| 03:50.2 | Max Shank | Send and receive yes and and receive. |
| 04:04.7 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 04:07.2 | mikebledsoe | Eternal behavior is masculine and maternal behavior is feminine and ah if we look at you know I'll give an example that I think you and I will be able to identify with and probably a lot of people in the audience is. When you were a kid and at a baseball game you were playing and you struck out the what was what's the response from the typical mother if you strike out. |
| 04:34.4 | Max Shank | Ah, it's okay, you'll get him next time right. |
| 04:37.3 | mikebledsoe | Exactly What's the typical response of the father in that situation. |
| 04:43.8 | Max Shank | Ah, you're ah a worthless piece of dirt if you had if you had listened to me this wouldn't have happened now probably here's probably here's what you should do differently like here's how you fix it. |
| 04:51.6 | mikebledsoe | Well, there's varying degrees. Um, yeah, so like ah and it's funny. You mentioned that that first example because there's healthy and and unhealthy expressions of both so the the healthy expression of of of paternal. Ah, healthy expression would be oh yeah, let's ah, we'll get them next time. Let's make sure we go to batting practice. You know I'm going to take you out tomorrow and we're gonna they're going to paint a picture of the future that's different than what it is right now whereas. Yeah, the maternal is like you know it's all good. You could keep striking out. It's not a big deal. Yeah yeah, I also think about the the masculine as holding the vision of the future and wanting to create progress. |
| 05:33.4 | Max Shank | Um, it's like it's like fixing versus accepting. |
| 05:48.6 | mikebledsoe | Where the feminine is is more ah is more accepting of just the way things are currently so both both are both are absolutely necessary. Is 1 thing I want to point out. |
| 05:54.2 | Max Shank | Yeah, and. |
| 06:02.0 | Max Shank | No question and if you if you slide the bar all the way to 1 side or the other you become ah impossible to live with.. Basically you can't You can't be 1 hundred percent. Ah, feminine traits and you can't be 1 hundred percent masculine traits like it just doesn't work. Especially right now right. |
| 06:25.0 | mikebledsoe | Yeah there's a lot more flexibility. Um, and but you know we have more choice for sure. But there's a book. Um that I read a while backed by a guy who I'm not remembering his name right now. It may come to me but basically he wrote 1 book called integral relationships and ah and that was that book was specifically written for men and then which brought another book which it might be on my bookshelf over there but I'm not seeing it. Um. Was written for men and women which is a very like thick dense book on you know relationships now. Ah the the name of the book I read the first 1 I read of his is integral relationships and that was um. If you know, ken wilbur's work. He he's the guy who who you know really pushed forward Integral theory. So a lot of what this guy talks about it's a very intellectual approach to masculine feminine and and relationships. And he takes the integral approach which includes spiral dynamics and so spiral dynamics is basically a model for viewing stages of development of human development and consciousness and how we perceive the world and how we behave in the world. And really, it's a predictor of values and how those values can change over time and evolve over time and if your values are this today we can expect that your values when they change are going to change into this next thing and so 1 of the really cool things that this book did was it was showing how. The the ah men so we were talking earlier about being masculine and feminine is not necessarily gender specific. It's not men and women. However, historically men have been associated with being more masculine and women have been associated with being more feminminine. So in this book 1 of the things that he talks about is there. Are you familiar with spiral dynamics much almost not at all cool. So basically ah. |
| 08:35.8 | Max Shank | Um, almost not at all only from what you've told me. |
| 08:44.4 | mikebledsoe | All of society is going through a stage of development and Consciousness. So We all experience these stages of Consciousness development as individuals. So What it looks like when you're a baby all you care about is yourself is a very individualistic and then it's about the parents and the family. And the most important thing when you're a kid is that you're you're fed comfortable and you're taking shits and then you progress and you social things become more important and you progress and you. Just follow the rules because these are the rules and then 1 day you realize oh these rules are made up and they work for a specific amount of time but after amount of time I Want to become an individual I don't want to follow these rules anymore you know and everyone goes to this little bit of a rebellious stage. |
| 09:37.1 | Max Shank | A. |
| 09:39.0 | mikebledsoe | And then they become more about the collective the we and then ah after be after day like max out and they get tired of being an individual they go well how can we work together and then after that there's there's other stages of of development and so when. People who look at this what they say about society as a whole especially we could say look at America specifically it's in a phase of moving from orange to greens so that is from a very individualistic capitalist type of mindset into more of a. A we type of of place where it's more of a collective mentality and there's a lot more self-sacrifice when we're in the we whereas when we're in the eye an individual It's less self- sacrificerifice more self-serving and more self-expression. Not caring what other people think about my expression whereas when you get into the we. It's more about Belonging. You don't want to stand out too much. You want to blend in and so what a lot of these people are saying is we're moving into this we um and. The the average american like there's enough people, especially the people we hang out with are you know they're in a personal development. They've been actually consciously choosing to develop and so what you end up with is as men go into this green phase of more of ah carrying. By the way if I were to look at both you and I we've we've gone beyond the green meme that that the hippie ah we stage and have been able to integrate all of it. Ah, but what he talks about in this book is when men go into this. And to the green stage the we collective all that kind of stuff they end up becoming much more feminine like they they adopt a lot of feminine traits and 1 of the reasons is because when someone moves into the the we stage into that green meme when they look back on the previous stages of development. They look at it with disgust and so it's typical for a man to get into this phase look at his previous stages of development see it in disgust and want to to not have anything and do with it and then um in culture. A lot of times those traits are associated with being masculine so they they want to throw off what they were before and a lot ah spirituality becomes an important topic for these people a lot of times when they hit the green stage and if you look at the spiritual communities and you look at. |
| 12:22.7 | mikebledsoe | Like like if you look at immature spiritual communities. You'll find a lot of men who lack masculinity and have taken on being feminine and so ah, these. Men are way more nurturing way more compassionate all these things we've we've all witnessed that and then for the women when they hit the stage of development. They they hit a stage of development. Ah the independent stage they actually cross over from being feminine to Masculine. At a stage previous to the men so it actually throws off society and so 1 of the things that he notes in the book which is interesting is that ah that when when men and women are in the stage. They're never going to be able to stay in a relationship very long. So if you look at our culture as a whole It seems like there's ah it's hard to stay in a relationship longer than a year and a year and a half and after that there's there's some friction in the relationship and then it and then it dissipates and so. That's that's extremely common and people stay single longer until they hit a certain stage of development because this is where we're at in society so women cross over into this very independent masculine traits when they hit that independence phase and throughout the green phase of development and. Women in that in those phases look at men who are ah in a stage of development under them with with like they're they're just children. They're not interested in that and then the 1 that is at the equal stage of development that green meme that those men discuss them. Because ah, the polarity is flipped and whereas they may be able to start a relationship with those men. They're not going to be satisfied over the long term and so ah in the Book. What he talks about is then after the green meme people move into. Ah so ah. Like a tier 2 consciousness and this tier 2 consciousness is when you get to integrate everything from before and when you do that when you look at you know when you accept the the we I care about the earth the planet everybody I also accept the independent me the 1 that wants to achieve and compete. Also accept the the tradition and what got us here and maybe even look at religion differently and look at warriors differently like seeing a place for all these There's always a place for tradition. There's a place for being a warrior. There's a place for independence and achievement. There's a place for. |
| 15:04.3 | mikebledsoe | We in the collective and so um, in this place when someone gets to this tier 2 consciousness and they've integrated all that their ability to be flexible between the masculine and the feminine becomes way more possible. And it can be flexible from moment to Moment. So Um I Forget why I explained all that but I imagine it could be helpful. |
| 15:33.0 | Max Shank | I Mean it sounds like it's quite complex. Not necessarily complicated but complex I Always think of that journey as like ah me we all I just call it me. We all and you go from me to we to all. |
| 15:45.9 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 15:51.6 | Max Shank | And everybody goes through that at different times if you look at different cultures I think of asian cultures specifically where the last name is spoken First you would be blood. So mike I would be shankoax and I think that. Dedication to the legacy of the family puts them more in that perspective from the very outset so that culture really breeds that concept of legacy right. |
| 16:25.0 | mikebledsoe | Well, there was um, there's legacy. But then there's also ah I know about um what I've learned about the South korean my buddy lived there for a while and he said that everybody always knows where they're at in the pecking order in the room and it's by age and if you're the youngest 1 |
| 16:39.1 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 16:44.7 | mikebledsoe | Ah, like everyone is aware of where they're at in the pecking order at all times and they know if someone should be serving them or if they should be serving somebody. So if someone's older they're serving them So there's this constant awareness and vigilance in a culture about. |
| 16:47.6 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 17:00.8 | mikebledsoe | And who everybody else is and who they are in that context whereas here. That's ah, that's not so common. |
| 17:09.0 | Max Shank | It's sort of debatable where you are in the hierarchy for most people and I think that's also what makes cooperation so difficult. That's why that's why a well-trained military with a hierarchy is going to beat down a band of nomads where nobody's really in charge. |
| 17:25.0 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 17:26.9 | Max Shank | Right? So that that understanding of hierarchy is crazy valuable and 1 of the things that you said that I really resonated with was the fluidity and I'm not talking about gender fluid. But I'm talking about the being able to change between masculine. And feminine traits and if you're not able to do that. You're not really going to be able to succeed in every part of life. You might be able to succeed in some parts of life but you won't really be expressing your ultimate manifestation. Of what you can be if you're not balancing the 2 and that's why that yin and yang symbol has that dynamism to it that spiraling of the light and the dark you know spinning around chasing each other basically and. |
| 18:17.9 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean when you look at the graphic when you look at the symbol it. It appears to be still. But if you let it move over time. Yeah, it's something spiraling. |
| 18:30.2 | Max Shank | Yeah, it's ah it's a dynamic ability to alternate between masculine and feminine and you know if you read ah art of seduction by Robert Green which is a gigantic book. But it's really good you you see all the. |
| 18:43.8 | mikebledsoe | Good book. |
| 18:48.7 | Max Shank | Um, you know the casan novas which I think I think that means catch a new 1 casa nova catch catch a new 1 at least it sounds like it. Ah I haven't been I've been able I haven't been able to find a confirmation but casa means catch in spanish and. |
| 18:55.6 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 19:08.6 | Max Shank | Nueva means New So That's kind of funny Anyway. So ah, seduction is about balancing those masculine and feminine traits and seduction is actually a very so it's active right? seduction. So It's masculine. But. The actions are very Feminine. You know Femininity is about being like an attractor even the egg right is secreting these ah pheromones basically or hormones I guess for the sperm to find their way. Up to the egg and it's such a. It's such a wildly different process and um, most. |
| 19:50.6 | mikebledsoe | And anyone who's in a relationship will recognize. There are times of the cycle in which you're more attracted to your woman if you're a man than others and a lot of that it has to do with what's happening with that egg. So. |
| 19:58.0 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 20:04.3 | Max Shank | Well and if you just look at the structure of the 2 objects right? You have the egg which is this glorious little sphere wrapped in all this ah nutrition stuff in this little. And this little River getting carried along by Celia down the Fallopian tube. It's this very like elegant single unit and then on the male side. It's like a squadron of Jet Fighters like up to 500 million of them. All trying to basically seek and ah impregnate that same Target. So Just that experience itself says so much about the difference between masculinity and femininity. |
| 20:58.6 | mikebledsoe | I Want to point out that some people may be listening to this and go hang on you just switch from from masculine and feminine conversation to male female. Um, and ah the what? what? What? um. |
| 21:14.7 | Max Shank | Don't don't Misunderstand I'm set I'm saying the action is masculine. It just happens to be attached to the male. |
| 21:17.2 | mikebledsoe | What I want What? what? what? I want to point out the action is masculine. Well I would say I would say a lot of what we Ah what we see as masculine has biological. |
| 21:35.8 | Max Shank | For yeah. |
| 21:36.1 | mikebledsoe | Manifestations masculinity manifests physically in certain ways and being feminine manifests in certain ways. 1 is you're talking about sperm and egg. But also the penis and the vagina 1 is penetrating and giving and 1 is receiving. |
| 21:51.1 | Max Shank | Um, exactly and it's it's different with different animals. |
| 21:54.5 | mikebledsoe | So there's I think a lot of people want to separate out and and 1 ah hundred percent separate biology and and and I guess what we call it gender and. |
| 22:06.7 | Max Shank | Well I mean gender and Masculinity or femininity are totally different things and that's that's why I bring up that point like if you want to be a good seducer. Fellas. You need to actively. Matt young. Do some feminine things to maximize your seduction capabilities right? Ah and you know you look at the Animal kingdom. It's almost always the male with the pretty feathers. |
| 22:27.9 | mikebledsoe | Um, your attraction. |
| 22:43.9 | Max Shank | Like look at the peacock. For example, like he's just you know So what's more flamboyant than a peacock. It's just ridiculous. So it's all trying to um you know, show off, they're pretty colors and then with humans. It's. |
| 22:52.1 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 23:03.6 | Max Shank | It's kind of the opposite. The ladies are showing themselves as sexy and the guys by Ferraris and mansions to show that they can provide So it's just a different kind of like I just call it peacocking essentially men and women are always. |
| 23:17.7 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 23:22.6 | Max Shank | Peacocking and pee henning and the reality is we just we just repeat what we think? Ah, what we think works like I would say if if there was no um, incentive for a man to be. Like financially successful like almost no man would do it. They would just live um like if it didn't matter how well off they were in terms of their ability to get ladies because that's what we love the most as men. We love ladies. But. |
| 23:56.2 | mikebledsoe | Whole world revolves around it. |
| 23:58.5 | Max Shank | We Yeah, it's like how do I get in there like that right exact like we would all just live in like fraternity houses and everybody would pay like. |
| 24:03.3 | mikebledsoe | I got I I go I go ah hunting So I can provide for her me. Yeah. |
| 24:16.0 | Max Shank | Ah, hundred dollars a month in rent and there would be pizza all the time like it would it would be like total debauchery nobody would try that hard to ah do all these crazy things if it didn't have a serious benefit to getting ladies and. When you realize that it's kind of shocking like the lengths that we go to to do that. |
| 24:42.4 | mikebledsoe | I've had this conversation with many women where where um, we'll be they'll be talking about. You know how men are in Charge. You know they'll be complaining about something and I look at him like are you insane women have been in charge the whole time. And they're go. They're going. What do you mean is like the it's like every and yeah, y'all are the reason we do everything like like we build we build companies because of you we. |
| 25:05.3 | Max Shank | Wars have been fought and Empires have fallen over women. |
| 25:17.4 | mikebledsoe | Do this and that everything we do is is for you like you're You're very powerful I've I've had this conversation with many women and and we go back and forth and they realize that they they have some realizations with that. So it's that they. |
| 25:35.3 | Max Shank | But that's their job. |
| 25:37.2 | mikebledsoe | There There have been a lot of people that say that like ah the women are responsible for the development of consciousness because it went from who could be the the biggest brute in order to get women to intelligence became more important for the purpose protection and for. Ah, production and so men we as men recognize oh we need to advance our intellect and our ability to make money and this and that to serve for women so that requires us to have more intelligence and so that's driving. |
| 25:58.6 | Max Shank | Yep. |
| 26:15.2 | mikebledsoe | Us as well. So I think that even though there are ah unhealthy expressions men men are a lot of times confused about how to get women and I think that's what creates upset and and causes Wars and all this kind of stuff. |
| 26:33.9 | Max Shank | Yeah, and up. |
| 26:34.8 | mikebledsoe | Um, because they're confused about what women actually want and the more men can they can figure out what they want what women actually want. They probably have a lot more peace and just you know more production. Actually yeah yeah, well. |
| 26:47.8 | Max Shank | Wouldn't it be crazy if we just asked women what they wanted. It's weird. It's it's funny though because that's that's a feminine job is to be Judgmental now I can already hear. Ah, the like grinding of gears and all the lady brains who just heard that but it's actually a very important role like you have to determine if our feathers are pretty enough if we have like a nice enough nest or whatever. So I'm not surprised that. Women are more judgmental and that has its positive qualities and its negative qualities like how many men judge other men based on the clothes they wear. It doesn't really happen right? Yeah, mostly just right? exactly. So. |
| 27:34.9 | mikebledsoe | Mostly just the feminine men. |
| 27:42.9 | Max Shank | It's important to have that discernment which is a nicer way of saying judgmental and we have all these trigger words that make people really really upset and I think that's a huge detriment because it limits our ability to have clear communication. |
| 27:47.4 | mikebledsoe | E. |
| 28:01.7 | Max Shank | And use simple language. |
| 28:03.0 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I want I want to dig into hierarchy because you you did you used the word earlier I meant I mentioned being paternal maternal. You know I think people start thinking about. We just talked about. |
| 28:14.3 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 28:20.3 | mikebledsoe | Ah, how women are really in charge and and they there's this conversation that's been circling society for the last decade about patriarchy and so and I've got a disclaimer for this real quick. My girlfriend's a psychotherapist from the Bay I ah I have had this conversation with with someone who is has been steeped in like feminism femininism femininism feminism. Ah so it's. Um, it's it's something I think for us talk about what's what are you laughing about my ability to say it. Ah. |
| 29:04.4 | Max Shank | Just because it's part of how we make things so extra complicated right? The the words that we use words really should just be there to. |
| 29:14.7 | mikebledsoe | What's that Oh yeah. |
| 29:22.0 | Max Shank | Make the communication have greater precision not to like obscure the facts of life and I think that unfortunately what happens is 1 way to get like 1 up over on somebody else which is like power in the hierarchy is to. |
| 29:27.1 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, my. |
| 29:41.7 | Max Shank | Um, camouflage What you're really saying and to hide the reality with language and that's kind of goes back to our um, previous statement about it. Went from who has the big stick in the big muscles to who can tell the best story. |
| 29:45.6 | mikebledsoe | In. |
| 29:59.5 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 30:01.6 | Max Shank | And who can use language to get the job done and I think that's kind of what's happening right now with the you know the assault on the patriarchy because all these ideas are they have an intended goal and. It sort of has to go against nature when you create these new stories. The whole reason is like you're sort of going against what would naturally happen in these roles and if you come up with a good assault on a certain ideology. Whether it's true or not ah doesn't really matter like here's an example of what I'm talking About. We need to search. Everybody's phone so we can catch the pedophiles now I think the word pedophile is the fucking scariest front page word. There could possibly be and I just want ah you to think about So It's totally wrong for people people to be able to search our phones right? But if you come up with an emotional enough argument for that like okay. |
| 31:08.8 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 31:18.8 | Max Shank | Raping Kids has got to be the worst thing there is right? So How do you say that? the church is 1 hundred percent bad. Well they you know, raped these kids now I think teachers by sheer numbers rape or fuck more kids than priests do. But. And maybe doesn't make as good a headline I don't know Anyway, my point is this if there's if there Well what I'm saying is it's all about the story so you bring up that comment about like the patriarchy and femininity and feminism and. |
| 31:39.6 | mikebledsoe | I Love This is our topic now. |
| 31:52.7 | mikebledsoe | Which is feminism and feminity are are different things and that's worth talking about too. |
| 31:55.3 | Max Shank | It's totally different things like I mean we could try to. We could come up with a nice clear definition of feminism. But I think saying that men are worse or women are worse is ridiculous like. That that doesn't get us anywhere just the same way that saying oh well, you know because of this horrible thing we need to do an even more horrible thing. So. It's just like using a story to justify why it's okay. |
| 32:28.0 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I think it's a good foundation for for moving forward. Um, well,, there's the the story of patriarchy is that men are in charge and men have been in charge and I've been making all the decisions and you can tell because they're primarily the ones that are in office. Political office. They're the ones that are running the companies. They're the ones that are you know all these things like they're they're in positions of quote unquote power and women ah have traditionally been at home and ah. |
| 32:47.2 | Max Shank | M. |
| 33:03.8 | mikebledsoe | There has been a story told that there is no power in that position that there that the men are actually powerful and and the women are not when they're ah playing out the traditional gender roles and ah. When I remember having this conversation with 1 of my buddies danny and he was talking about how he was growing up and how his his dad was was largely absent. He would just come in and out he was dating all these different women and he grew up and i. Ah, home full of it was women the grandmother the mother the the ants and everything it was a highly matriarchal home he was he was brought up. He was raised by women. He was not raised by men and he. You know it hit him 1 day goes is like oh I was like raised in a matriarchy so at ah at the family level if you look if we're looking at traditional gender roles at the family level. The woman carries most of the power she spends most of the money she makes most the purchases. She chooses the food you're going to eat that the activities the kids are going to do the the father is usually so ah busy needing to make money to provide all the things. That the the family needs and wants and maybe what he wants for them. But also what the woman wants for the family and the kids but she's women are if we're looking at traditional gender roles are largely dictating the development of children and to me there's nothing more powerful than that i. Don't care who's running the businesses or running the countries and things like that. That's that's illusory in a way people men are being um so there's when I look at feminism complaining about patriarchy what I what I witness. Is that there is a feminist is somebody who says that the traits of men are more valuable than the traits of women and in order for men and women to be equal. Women need to be able to have all the traits they desire that that men typically fulfill and and for instance you know, like equal pay for for jobs and and being able to be ceo as a company and congresswomen and the president of the United states and all that stuff. |
| 35:46.7 | mikebledsoe | Which I have no opposition to whatsoever I Think that's I think that's great if women want to do that Then that's that's a great place to be. Yeah, it is already possible. So but it it. |
| 35:54.4 | Max Shank | That's already possible though. It's just about the blame game really like it's already possible for any man or any woman to make any amount of money as long as they deliver the value there is. Ah, the only privilege there really is is who your parents are and who you know because if my good friend. Ah if I'm the president and my good friend who is a woman wants a job. She's going to get a job even if there's a dude who's probably more qualified. Because that's how the world works you want people that you know and trust maybe even more generally than who is the best 1 for the job but the key with all those points is like who polices that ah concept of of fairness right? So it. All those arguments to me just make no sense because it goes completely against ah that whole Martin luther king idea of you know it's more about what you have on the inside than what you are on the outside and anything that divides people up, you know. Especially male and female like how is there going to be the the idea is we should communicate and figure out who naturally likes to do what and I think that's why you have certain relationships that work where there's a man. Who doesn't earn as much as the woman but he's a more ah nurturing type and she's more of a power type and that doesn't happen all the time but it happens sometime sometimes so I think it's more about finding someone who's a good match for your particular dna. Rather than for this like blanket statement that like men bad women good or or vice versa. |
| 37:50.6 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and the roles that they typically play you know, being better than other roles I I think about roles versus hierarchy. Um, and so I mean this is what I've been circling a bit in that. Ah, there has. |
| 37:58.2 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 38:08.1 | mikebledsoe | When I look at say the feminist movement. There's this, they're saying that that career is the more important thing and. |
| 38:14.7 | Max Shank | We should just let him have all the jobs and stay at home for a few generations like I want to I want to do it like lions where there's like a male lion and he's just like lounging around and the ladies are like we're going to go hunting again. Do you want to come. He's like no no no I got to protect the pride. And the lady's like yeah you got to protect the group of lions from all of the crazy predators that are going to attack us right? He's like yeah pick me up some zebra if you can I'm going to be here resting up for when it's mating time just wake me up when you get back. |
| 38:46.1 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm into it. Um, but but I just want to bring up like ah because there's this importance put on career if it over say family. Whatever, Ah then ah, there's this I think there's this confusion that that hierarchy like having a career is better like making more money is actually better that doesn't make you better or higher up on the rung um than if you're at home. Raising children for instance, like there's to me what I What I witness is like an even partnership between people. But there's been a ah story. That's been has been painted that the man is and you know he's the 1 that's in charge and if we look at. |
| 39:26.8 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 39:32.7 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 39:40.4 | Max Shank | Um, well merit a merit. |
| 39:44.1 | mikebledsoe | Masculine Feminine traits like we look at the sorry the paternal it is painting a picture of the future for them to live into and and the mother may be in that that role may be the more accepting and and nurturing of what already is it may appear as though there is a. There is this the man is Leading. He's leading in certain areas of the relationship and and of the family but the woman is also leading in certain areas and these areas are not necessarily more important than the other areas and I think that our society has gotten confused about that. Yeah. |
| 40:13.9 | Max Shank | Yeah,, that's the yeah, That's the crazy part because a marriage is really a business partnership marriage has nothing to do with Love it has to do with a business arrangement like we are going to now enter into this business agreement where. Our mission is to either like reproduce or at least work together to handle this family enterprise and it's kind of like saying that the Chief ah marketing officer is more important than the Chief Financial officer. |
| 40:49.4 | mikebledsoe | Right? right. |
| 40:51.0 | Max Shank | Right? Yeah, the chief marketing officer is out there making all the money and you know he's out there and he's like you know wheeling and dealing and he knows all these people and then the cfo is sitting in an office and saying to the Chief marketing officer. No you idiot we can't afford that. Right? That's what cf is supposed to do I think and so right exactly and you know if you're if you're on your own you probably need to have ah some of both of those traits but it's ridiculous. |
| 41:09.0 | mikebledsoe | Ah, that's ah, that's what the good cfos I've had have done for me. Yeah yeah. |
| 41:25.7 | Max Shank | To say that 1 is more important than the other right? um and look. It's only true in like 99 percent of animals that the females are the nurturing ones and just from my firsthand experience. Ah. |
| 41:28.6 | mikebledsoe | You know. |
| 41:45.2 | Max Shank | Women are way more nurturing way more like who could even argue that that's great. Ah, there are a few examples where the male does the nurturing you know what? a casso area is. It's like that. |
| 41:58.3 | mikebledsoe | No. |
| 42:03.1 | Max Shank | Blue faced dinosaur bird with the little thing on top. It's about the size of an ostrich. It's like the second largest bird. Yeah, they're gnarly they have these claws anyway like usual, the females are about twenty five percent bigger and the females. |
| 42:06.5 | mikebledsoe | Now a fart. |
| 42:22.7 | Max Shank | Go around and mate with as many males as possible and then the male sits on the nest and raises the kids and what's and what's crazy is when the female. Well. |
| 42:29.6 | mikebledsoe | So They get all the sex and then the responsibility. We were born the wrong species. |
| 42:41.6 | Max Shank | I still think I'd rather be a lion that seems the best ah but what's crazy also is she makes literally all the decisions even like whether it's mating time or not like I saw this crazy documentary where the female comes back. To the same male as before and goes it's mating time so you're going to have to let that little kid go because he's got 1 baby left that he is literally nurturing right? and it's her baby and she's like ah. No, no, no, it's it's mating time now you got to let that kid go and look for some new eggs and he's like no and she's like yes and so of course he just does so he like abandons this kid that he has been nurturing and then ah you know has sex with the Bertha big bertha and then just sits on another pile of eggs because she said so I mean that's rare is my point. It's rare that the male is the 1 who nurtures and I think with. Because we're mostly talking about people I got a million examples about animal facts but it like can't we just use a little bit of common sense and admit what we like and what we don't like you know the reason that women don't get into. Um you know. Some of the scientific fields as much and engineering is probably they just don't like to is that okay to say I mean I don't know possibly I mean culture has a lot to do culture culture has a lot to do with it too. I mean I think it goes. |
| 44:19.0 | mikebledsoe | Possibly Yeah I don't know I haven't haven't run the survey. |
| 44:29.8 | Max Shank | Even deeper. It's like what is rewarded is repeated so what? Ah Monkey see Monkey do what is rewarded is repeated. These are like very simple fundamental realities of how we become the people that we are and rather than like. |
| 44:32.6 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 44:49.6 | Max Shank | Blame 1 gender or the other It's like if we look into the past with any kind of like magnifying Glass. We're going to see a lot of very evil shit. We'll see a lot of good things too. But we'll see a lot of very evil things too. It's like oh man. See what's so crazy is I think of things and then I'm like I can't say that because everyone will hate me but didn't We have a hashtag Once that said, believe all women wasn't that a thing for a while about about the me too thing now I've never known a woman to lie. |
| 45:18.1 | mikebledsoe | I Think so yeah, oh yeah. |
| 45:26.0 | Max Shank | Ever. But but believe all women I mean come on like that any any of these like divisive things are just compounding compounding compounding the problem. Yeah, it's ridiculous. |
| 45:34.3 | mikebledsoe | Or yeah, the absolutes It's like this is an absolute thing. It's like this is always you know that the absolutes are always never anytime anyone starts using absolute language fucking red flag just start going up and what but yeah, you've bought into a story and it's. |
| 45:46.5 | Max Shank | Ah, oh my god yeah, it's ridiculous. Yeah, all all this divisive stuff like we're we're human beings first and foremost like if we can't if we can't like get together on that front. |
| 45:54.3 | mikebledsoe | You're full of shit. Ah. |
| 46:06.2 | Max Shank | Then all of these other arguments are taking us further and further away from the truth. Basically I don't think any progress can be made when we try to blame black people or white people or men or women or gays Or. Catholics I don't know why I've grouped those 2 together but you get the idea like it. It just is wrong to do that. |
| 46:31.5 | mikebledsoe | Yeah anytime I mean we talked about this before the the victim villain hero the the Drama triangle. Yeah anytime that starts coming into play it it create creates division and what it really I think. |
| 46:37.0 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 46:48.1 | mikebledsoe | Instead of division I think a better word for this and what's more accurate is conflict. It creates conflict like yeah division but division without division. Ah you won't get conflict if everyone's together and unified that reduces the conflict. |
| 46:52.3 | Max Shank | Oh yeah. |
| 47:03.8 | Max Shank | Um, right. |
| 47:05.7 | mikebledsoe | But when someone thinks that they're different than somebody else when they believe that thought that max is you know he's doing me wrong in some way because yes because he has something and I don't then you know that that doesn't It's not any good for Me. And how I may end up treating you because I believe that's not good for you and then that that creates conflict and even if you never receive in the impact of that the person who believes that someone else has an advantage over them. They're the ones that suffer the most from that belief. |
| 47:39.3 | Max Shank | Totally it's us and them mentality. It's like ah you know, eat eat the rich basically kind of thing I mean it takes ah it takes no subtleties or nuance into consideration and that's 1 of the big. Um. |
| 47:48.0 | mikebledsoe | I. |
| 47:59.1 | Max Shank | Growing pains that we're having right now because what catches the most attention is something that's like under 10 words and super inflammatory. So if you don't look at the big picture and be like well you know? Ah yeah I I can't say the picture in 10 words but you get the idea is. |
| 48:15.1 | mikebledsoe | Um, well I think I think the ah like language is is the language is people's thoughts what they say is what they're thinking. There's a lot of things that they don't say that they're. |
| 48:17.4 | Max Shank | You just become at odds. |
| 48:34.7 | mikebledsoe | Thinking. But if you reduce the vocabulary or if you reduce the amount of of words that are being used then you start removing Nuance and when you start removing Nuance it. It actually starts. Killing people's ability to critically think as a whole. So if you have the same narrative going all the time or it's just headlines and people aren't Discussing. You're not allowed to or it's not popular to discuss Nuance You can tell who's not thinking critically because they're not. |
| 49:07.0 | Max Shank | No. |
| 49:12.1 | mikebledsoe | And a nuanced conversation If you're entering into a nuanced conversation where we're getting a good understanding on what things are recognizing. It's not absolute.. It's not black and white. There's ah and it's not even gray. It's just everything is ah this unique. Ah. Thing that we get to discuss and we really want to discuss and understand all sides of it and semantics matter here as well. And so I think that like when we look at any of these things that causes conflict We have all these people that that are making groups of people. And then creating absolutes about those groups of people and leaving out any nuance and um, you know I hate to use the word brainwashing because I think brainwashing is is actually you know if if we took it literally to to wash the mind would be a good thing is to get rid of some garbage. |
| 50:04.6 | Max Shank | Well, it can be. It can be good or it could be horrible. It depends on what you put after. |
| 50:08.4 | mikebledsoe | But the but what we see here is just like it's ah it's a dampening of consciousness when you start when if you lack nuance and you reduce the vocabulary the book nineteen eighty four by george orwell 1 of the things that was a common. Ah. |
| 50:21.0 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 50:26.4 | mikebledsoe | and and george r wells a fucking genius and understood language deeply and 1 of the things that was part of the book was that there was I think it was on the they were on the ninth edition of the special dictionary that the the people were to use and that culture and each book got smaller. |
| 50:40.8 | Max Shank | The. |
| 50:46.4 | mikebledsoe | Each dictionary had fewer words and words started to be outlawed. Oh you can't say that it's replaced with this or instead of saying and and everything just got shorter and shorter and shorter because people who have the inability to because what you're able to. |
| 50:47.2 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 51:06.0 | mikebledsoe | Process becomes diminished when you when you don't have as good a use of language and you start missing nuance because this word means twenty different things instead of just this 1 thing and it's um, when people are confused. They're easy to control. And it's It's a very interesting thing to witness right now with with the division conflict and the absolute language being used and the inability of certain things or people to be able to use certain language or even discuss certain topics. It's.. It's a very sad state of affairs. |
| 51:44.2 | Max Shank | Well controlling language is controlling thought and you have censorship through self censorship which is basically through the the collective will shame you and then you have actual censorship where ah, you are legally not allowed. |
| 51:54.5 | mikebledsoe | So and. |
| 52:02.0 | mikebledsoe | Aka Fact checkers. |
| 52:03.9 | Max Shank | It legally not allowed to say something or ah, even beyond that where you speak up and you suddenly have committed suicide or you become suicided and the ministry of truth. Yeah, totally. |
| 52:15.2 | mikebledsoe | You're suicided. Well we I think we should just call. Ah the fact checkers the ministry of of truth or yeah. |
| 52:23.1 | Max Shank | Well Ah, what's that saying who will police the police even Thomas Sowell has a saying ah the the big question is not what will we do? It is who will decide what we do and that and that's that's a core question and the answer should be. |
| 52:34.8 | mikebledsoe | Um, like. |
| 52:43.1 | Max Shank | The individual 99 percent of the time. But if you convince the individual that they're not capable of making that decision then they will hand it off to somebody else and that's where like I just have this image in my brain It's a video of Mussolini saying. Ah. 1 country 1 decision and this huge crowd goes. Yeah like they are so excited they're they're they're like they're more like rocking and rolling than ah I don't know. Ah, foo fighters concert or something like that. They're just like going bananas I've never been to a foodo fighters' concert that was the only thing I could think of I'm like they're popular right? shows you? how much I know? Ah, but they were excited about 1 country 1 decision and. |
| 53:24.6 | mikebledsoe | I. |
| 53:35.0 | Max Shank | In order to get to that point you have to make those individuals believe that the result would in fact, be better and you can even take that idea back to slavery so you know terrorism is using fear to control people right. And the greatest terror organization I know of is our own media because they literally emit the most fear and control the most minds. Ah I don't I don't think ah any of those like Arabian fellows have even like come close scratch the surface. On their terrorism compared to the you know media here. But anyway so you use fear to control so you use fear to control people and think about Slavery. For example, you know I've heard some people ask the question. Well why didn't they just fight back. And it's because the thing that we all want most is to not die. That's so deeply primal and you would think like slavery slavery would be impossible if everybody just stopped working and would ah like fight back. But of course that didn't happen. |
| 54:37.5 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 54:52.4 | Max Shank | Because a intellectually they didn't see that as a viable option and that's where the brainwashing comes into play because Slavery is a lot about definition. So if you are told that story of slavery and you believe that it's possible and I'm not just talking about slavery in the usa I'm saying. You know slavery throughout the history of mankind. It's almost every people have been enslaved. |
| 55:18.7 | mikebledsoe | There's usually more slaves than there are masters. That's basically how it works. |
| 55:21.0 | Max Shank | Yeah way more?? Um, and it it all has to do with the the fear of death right? or maybe because we're such compassionate creatures. You know we're afraid of them killing someone else like I say hey Mike you better. Get back to your slave labor I'm going to kill your lady friend over here and you're like okay, fine master I Will you know submit to you or whatever. But it's it's fascinating how the fear of death and the language- driven ideas are really what. Enable slavery as a whole and there are different. There are different types like some people are just slaves to their telephone right now they believe whatever comes out of their telephone. They check it all the time they're constantly plugged in and that's another thing that makes it difficult to think clearly. Is that you've now built up this addiction which is a you know form of enslavement. Basically where ah it's kind of unprecedented to have the world in your pocket all the time talking at you. |
| 56:31.5 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I spend the first four hours at least sometimes the entire day the first four hours not consuming any any content any media because it's um. |
| 56:45.5 | Max Shank | That's really smart. |
| 56:49.9 | mikebledsoe | There's so much for me to create and to consider and to be with that I don't need any outside information to pollute my mind I I wait till the second half of the day to really engage with other people's agendas. |
| 57:02.7 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 57:08.6 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 57:09.0 | mikebledsoe | What they want me to do ah you know that means checking my email. Maybe even checking text messages. Ah, you know there's there's a lot of things that I just that that that habit and really recognizing at first was I want to be on my own agenda and I stopped checking my email. |
| 57:25.1 | Max Shank | Ah, the. |
| 57:27.9 | mikebledsoe | First thing of the day really really set the dominoes up to be at a place where like I'm not listening to music with lyrics in the morning I I am going to journal I'm going to be alone with my thoughts I'm going to write um and it's ah. It's created a lot more peace in my life I've become much more effective so you know for anyone who's listening a great tip that I'm um, bestowing on you now is ah 1 way to brainwash yourself in in a positive way is to spend more time with. Your own thoughts and writing them down and actually seeing if they're your own thoughts or not ah usually not and if you do that long enough. What's being put out in the media and what's being said by a lot of people you know people at large when I go out and talk to people. I can smell bullshit so much faster than when I was younger and I think it is because of the amount of time I've spent reflection and recognizing that most of my own thoughts are bullshit and you know if most of my thoughts are bullshit and I try hard to to know the truth. Then the majority of other people's thoughts are bullshit too. They're not better than you people people are generally just full of shit. |
| 58:51.0 | Max Shank | Yeah I mean that is such a valuable piece of advice that probably ninety percent of people will completely ignore and just move on to the next thing. Ah. It's difficult though because there's this hunger. There's this feeling like I need to learn more I need to know more and I just remember I was on a panel at a seminar and everyone's like what's ah, what's a Book. You would recommend. And so I'm up there with like maybe 10 or twelve presenters from this weekend of things and you know everyone's got their examples I'm like oh yeah I like that. But and I'm like near the end of the line right? and like oh yeah I like that book too and then by the time it got to me I was like. Listen everybody you just paid like 7 hundred bucks so you could hear us synthesize everything we know for the exact thing you're trying to do the last thing you should do is buy another Book. You should spend the next ninety days and deliberately not read. Any other book and just implement what you learned because that's where most people mess up is in the doing what they know it's not that people don't know what to do? It's just that they don't do what they know and the same thing goes for the creation consumption ratio. Um, journal out your thoughts on your life journal out. Ah why you think certain things write out your your plan write out a strategy for getting more customers or for getting more clients or for wooing a few more ladies. I mean when you give yourself up to the consumer archetype then that's just what you are and that's okay, like being a consumer is really fun. It's a devil's bargain like I can hardly resist I'm a curious guy I'll just watch national geographic. And like bbc earth like all day if it were out and just eat casead ideas or something I don't know, but but but if you you know when I kind of like you if I don't eat in the morning and if I don't consume stuff. Something good will happen. You know you just have to give yourself that space and that's that's the yin side. That's the feminine side is the space to create and that silence and that's where you're going to find peace of mind and if you're hyper young, you're not goingnna. |
| 01:01:20.5 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, um. |
| 01:01:26.3 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 01:01:36.8 | Max Shank | You're not going to find that peace of mind you're going to be looking or oh I got to find the next thing I got to do the next thing and it's like probably not. |
| 01:01:40.2 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well it takes a little bit of masculine energy to create boundaries and uphold those boundaries and being in that space is more of a feminine aspect if we won't. |
| 01:01:49.6 | Max Shank | Ah, well yeah, and if you are like most guys afraid that people will call you a homo if you do anything that is like closely resembling femininity then you're basically shooting yourself in the foot. To please people who probably don't even like you I mean is or don't care is is so ridiculous. But. |
| 01:02:13.6 | mikebledsoe | Ah, oh yeah, most people don't care about. They're not thinking about you as much as you think that they're thinking about you Well that your this is an anomaly. |
| 01:02:19.7 | Max Shank | I mean I think about you a lot. |
| 01:02:27.1 | Max Shank | Ah, it's it's very liberating to realize like no 1 ne's thinking about you. They're just thinking about their own life and the the sooner you can let go of the attachment to masculine or feminine and just. |
| 01:02:33.0 | mikebledsoe | I Got the hour shut. |
| 01:02:46.2 | Max Shank | Use both when it's appropriate. It's like what's the best tool a screwdriver or a socket wrench. It's a stupid question like what's the best gender male or female. It's a stupid question What's the best. Ah. Type masculine or feminine. So another stupid question. What's better lightness or darkness they're they're all really really dumb questions that shouldn't even cross your mind. You should just learn when to use which trait like when is it appropriate to be more masculine and. Stand your ground and be an aggressive monster because look I'm a pretty feminine guy actually most of the time because it's it's more fun I like talking to ladies and when it's time to be Masculine. You should be a devastating monster. |
| 01:03:27.4 | mikebledsoe | But yeah. |
| 01:03:40.0 | Max Shank | And you should lay waste to any barriers that might enter your path and if you get stuck in 1 or the other you just won't be as effective. So I that would. |
| 01:03:48.6 | mikebledsoe | Well I think I think that it builds capacity for if you want a more have more capacity or range or'll call it range if you want to have more range and your masculine if you want to be able to be very masculine if you're trying to redline your masculinity all the time. |
| 01:03:56.5 | Max Shank | Range. |
| 01:04:08.4 | mikebledsoe | You're going to blow an o ring right? But if you if you allow yourself be in that feminine place and retract you got expansion and contraction if you allow yourself to come out of that then when it's time to really lay waste as you said you actually have the energy to do it. |
| 01:04:23.3 | Max Shank | Um. |
| 01:04:27.9 | mikebledsoe | You actually can show up and do it because you've been you've been waiting for that. But the waiting is not a masculine thing. It's a feminine thing so I've I've noticed that in my own work I've become much more feminine over the years and that is there's a lot more relaxation a lot more waiting a lot more patience for. You know things to line up and I've had moments where it's time to do a lot of work. We go. Oh we got 3 weeks where we're gonna fucking put our heads down or I have a retreat and I've got my team there who they I just wear them out. Like how's this guy who's older and doing this and like how does he have so much energy. It's like oh it's because I was waiting I went covid hit I I had was like peak feminine for myself when covid hit and hits I go oh we're going to change some things in the business I'm glad I've been resting. I can I can really do a lot of work now and everyone who had been in their masculine the whole time leading up to that then they had like push harder into their masculine and they just didn't have the juice there. |
| 01:05:22.2 | Max Shank | E. |
| 01:05:28.1 | Max Shank | O. Yeah I think the range is key but I'm afraid people won't think I'm tough unless I'm masculine all the time. |
| 01:05:36.6 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah I. |
| 01:05:43.9 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, just just so you guys know that's not going to get you laid I think we already covered the tough the tough guy ah podcast I think that's when 1 of our previous episodes I'm sure we'll cover it again. Any last word, you want to leave people with were. |
| 01:05:55.6 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, that's good stuff. |
| 01:06:03.4 | mikebledsoe | Over an hour now. |
| 01:06:03.8 | Max Shank | Ah, well just just look how many ways it can work in the animal Kingdom you know humans are just really weird animals I think the most important thing is you don't get caught up in. Your identity being based on whether you're a man or a lady and you recognize that masculinity and feminity are just our extensions of Yin and Yang and understand that there's an appropriate time to use both. When you're tired sleep when you're hungry eat. Um, when it's time to go hunting. Go be go be a monster and and do your hunt. |
| 01:06:47.3 | mikebledsoe | Beautiful. That's all I got I'm gonna leave it at that. Yep for max go to Maxank dot Com and what else what else you got just. |
| 01:06:53.9 | Max Shank | Sounds good. Thanks everybody. |
| 01:07:03.2 | Max Shank | Max shank I'm like the only 1 named that yeah just look me up. |
| 01:07:05.0 | mikebledsoe | Ah, search ma you are you are like the only 1 named that yep, find me on Instagram mike underscore Bloodso which Instagram's down today actually so we'll see maybe they all'll stay down dude I tried to get into Facebook earlier. |
| 01:07:15.2 | Max Shank | What are what are we gonna do I'm gonna start doing crack. |
| 01:07:23.7 | mikebledsoe | I think that's that next logical step. Yeah when Facebook goes down. Yeah, probably not ah so yeah and the strong coach for you coaches up there. That's all we got and until next time. |
| 01:07:25.6 | Max Shank | Might not be as destructive mentally. |
| Timestamp | Speaker | Transcript |
| 00:01.87 | mikebledsoe | So so what's a coach max. |
| 00:04.97 | Max Shank | Ah, Coach is someone who gets you to do what you know you should mike. |
| 00:09.83 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, pretty simple, pretty simple shit. It's like I I tell coaches all the time that ah you know their clients know they're not supposed to eat that donut but they do it anyway. |
| 00:15.80 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 00:27.47 | mikebledsoe | You know if our job was to just get people Macros then you know robots to be doing this shit for us but people have real that the problems are are psychological. They're environmental. There's a lot of different factors there. They know what to do. |
| 00:41.65 | Max Shank | All of the all of the real difficult problems are psychological like physical problems are pretty straightforward unless they're stemming from a mental dysfunction of some kind like even guys with no legs end up on a good training program. So There's like the guy who's like oh well, my you know my ankle just hurts too much to exercise like look I know guys with no legs who exercise more than you do. It's not that you don't have the ability and it's hard to be honest with yourself about these things I mean the reality is. Our biggest barrier to getting the things we want is ourself by far and if you don't accept that then you're going to be in a state of like victim victimization and blaming your problems on other people. |
| 01:33.22 | mikebledsoe | You know. |
| 01:35.00 | Max Shank | Right? So everything is psychological. That's why when we were talking about coaching earlier I was thinking you know it makes sense that people want something That's just done for them like give me this nutrition plan. It's so straightforward just give me this marketing plan. Give me you know, tell me how many bullet points. |
| 01:51.35 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, somebody knocking at my door positive real quick I think I have to sign for a package. Yeah, so the the post postal service just stopped by. |
| 01:54.97 | Max Shank | I Need to put in my offer. Ah yeah, okay at the. |
| 02:09.47 | mikebledsoe | And um, they had a package for me and my girlfriend and from a girlfriend. Ah they asked I said hey because of the virus. Ah you I I can't You're supposed to sign this but you can't sign it because of the virus. But with your permission I'll sign it for you said sure this is my name and goes. Okay, Thank you. |
| 02:34.36 | Max Shank | Ah huh. |
| 02:37.18 | mikebledsoe | What what? what? fucking good is a signature these days. |
| 02:41.65 | Max Shank | I Guess in that situation. It's completely worthless. Yeah. |
| 02:46.22 | mikebledsoe | Completely worthless. So anyways and I forgot what we're talking about but we we were talking about productivity. Well we're trying to go down productivity. |
| 02:52.17 | Max Shank | Oh I remember don't Worry. We're well I mean I'm sure this is gonna be a heck of a fun time to edit this into a seamless transition but with with coaching the reason. That when it comes to business or nutrition or exercise people are just like give me the program tell me how many almonds to eat and when to eat them tell me tell me how many bullet points I need in my sales pitch tell me that I need 3 say here are the things that you're missing and I need 3 that say here are the secrets that you need or something like that right people want it done for them and the reason they want it done for them is because real deep change. Is crazy uncomfortable because it's psychological. It's essentially some sort of psychological trauma and very ingrained behavior that causes someone to slowly kill themselves with Donuts. For example. |
| 04:04.78 | mikebledsoe | You know? Yeah yeah, well it makes me think about the hermetic principles and the first of the hermetic principles is everything is mental. |
| 04:08.47 | Max Shank | And just. |
| 04:15.97 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 04:17.97 | mikebledsoe | And that I mean I think those principles are about 3000 years old to the best of our knowledge and that has been repeatedly supported over and over again. |
| 04:32.85 | Max Shank | Well, and even if it's not absolutely true. It's the most constructive belief to have right? because every all words are trying to be symbols for something else and. |
| 04:41.21 | mikebledsoe | It's empowering. Yeah. |
| 04:51.15 | Max Shank | None of them are going to be absolutely true, but some of them are going to be very constructive or empowering like you said that's a good way to put it So what? What are the most empowering ah lies available to you instead of the most destructive lies available to you. |
| 05:06.31 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, yeah, you know I wish I had that frame when I was younger I would have I was so caught up and figuring out what was true or not that I I totally didn't see that I I was if somebody was duping me I was getting duped. |
| 05:15.20 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 05:25.56 | mikebledsoe | By this pursuit that there's ah a right and a wrong way and there's the truth and there's a lie. It's like oh no, it's just all lies. It's just all different flavors. So useful or not. We talked about that last show. |
| 05:33.50 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, yeah, buyer beware exactly. |
| 05:41.39 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, you're talking about like people want things done for them. They want the result. Um, they're not really focused on how to get the result unless it. |
| 05:51.21 | Max Shank | Or why they are where they are It's deeply uncomfortable I mean I've had so many I mean I've coached a lot of people in fifteen plus years of personal training and there are people who I say the word food. And they're like I don't want to talk about it I don't want to talk about food and I'm like okay this is interesting. You know you're a hundred pounds overweight and I like doing these squats with you but I don't think we're going to solve the problem in here. |
| 06:09.74 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 06:25.35 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, there's ah. |
| 06:27.90 | Max Shank | I mean I'm getting I'm getting paid big money big money to help this person exercise and feel better. But I mean you're 1 hundred pounds overweight like I'm not going to solve this I could crack a whip. While you ride a bicycle or cross- country ski for an hour There's just no way that we're going to be able to resolve the real problem and the reason ah people avoid is because it's deeply uncomfortable your ego and your identity gets wrapped up into this selfim image and and that's. It's it's way more uncomfortable and that's why people don't want to face those uncomfortable ah truths about themselves and that's why they just want just do it for me I don't want to look at it I don't want to face it. |
| 07:03.16 | mikebledsoe | Play for yeah. |
| 07:14.30 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well coaches do the same thing. Coaches are comfortable with training people. But they're not comfortable. It can be uncomfortable to talk have that conversation with someone says hey you're you're sick. You're. You're way overweight. You're obese you need to change your diet and you know I think a lot of coaches just they don't know how to approach the conversation and that's that's a skill in itself I remember a point where I i. |
| 07:43.66 | Max Shank | And. |
| 07:53.10 | mikebledsoe | Felt as though I had no business telling my clients who were there to get results how they should live their lives outside of working out and you know food suggestions. But then I was training a guy that was probably he was about 400 pounds he was over 200 pounds overweight. He was. |
| 08:03.20 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 08:12.94 | mikebledsoe | He was in bad shape 30 years old just you know like how the fuck does that happen type of guy. Yeah, yeah, and um, you know we were trying everything ah food like nutrition and training wise. Um. |
| 08:16.93 | Max Shank | Who hurt him. |
| 08:31.26 | mikebledsoe | But then you know as I got to know him better. He worked at a pesticide company like eighty hours a week in a cubicle under fluorescent lights and I'm like like dude that job's killing you. My job is not helping you and I just I got to the point where I was like. |
| 08:39.65 | Max Shank | Heavy. |
| 08:50.11 | mikebledsoe | Have to tell him this and um and it was helpful for him and it was it started a conversation that unraveled over time but that was that was me as a coach understanding that I can give Lifestyle suggestions I can talk to people about their work and their career that. |
| 09:07.18 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 09:09.45 | mikebledsoe | It's keeping them from reaching their goals. So most coaches are still they still are afraid to have those conversations. |
| 09:15.66 | Max Shank | Yeah I mean nothing is off limits if it's approached in the right way and you've built a foundation of some sort of rapport. You know if some if some lady comes in who's overweight. Ah and I don't know her very well I don't go oh hey, when's the Baby. Do. Because that would probably feel very offensive or something like that you know like there's got to be some sort of it'd be humorous, probably not to her but you have to base what you say on, you got to know your audience right? and. |
| 09:40.29 | mikebledsoe | Ah, now. |
| 09:50.48 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 09:53.36 | Max Shank | There's a compassionate way to have that conversation and usually questions make the most sense and making sure people are are ready to to make that change because you know we're talking about how old wisdoms are so true. Ah, how about you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink like you know that? What's that show intervention where they get all your family together and tell you to stop doing Meth and they're like we love you. We. |
| 10:15.18 | mikebledsoe | You know. |
| 10:26.84 | mikebledsoe | I I know that's an intervention. There's a show. Okay, yeah. |
| 10:31.38 | Max Shank | Yeah, that's what I'm saying Yeah um, that's some good Tv right there by the way that's entertainment. Ah, um, yeah, yeah, totally hey I mean whatever gets your rocks off is what I say. |
| 10:41.66 | mikebledsoe | For the sick fucks out there. Yeah I'm with you. |
| 10:51.24 | Max Shank | No shame in that game. Ah, but not all of them are are ready. You know you can have ah like the most professional therapist there and a loving family who's like you just wish you just would stop doing drugs and he's like I don't want to then he leaves like that happens Sometimes that guy is not ready. |
| 11:05.77 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, there's um, yeah. |
| 11:10.51 | Max Shank | So You got to you got to have a receptive audience. You got to have a receptive Receiver and that's true with business. That's true with relationships like what's that ah, you know what's the 1 advantage you would want in in business if you are selling burgers. Is it The best tasting burger is it The cheapest burger. No no, no, it's a starving crowd someone who is ready to receive the burger like the whole the whole phrase I'm going to sell ice to eskimos is a ridiculous phrase. That's that's not what a good. |
| 11:34.89 | mikebledsoe | Yep. |
| 11:47.56 | Max Shank | Business person would do they would they would sell them. You know Dura flame Logs and space heaters at an affordable price right? that you know it's you got to have a receptive audience. |
| 11:56.24 | mikebledsoe | What? yeah yeah, um, this makes you think about selling people something ah a solution that they actually want and and the way they want it solved. So. |
| 12:09.80 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 12:15.40 | mikebledsoe | It's something that I've been really focused on is meeting people where they're at and that how do they want the problem solved sell them that but then also layer in all the stuff That's actually going to make a difference because the truth is is if they solve the problem the way they wanted it solved it just wouldn't be solved. It's not. |
| 12:25.87 | Max Shank | Earth. |
| 12:35.80 | mikebledsoe | They they would just be able to solve it themselves. They wouldn't be here buying this package So so you got to sell them what they want and give them what they need and all that mess. |
| 12:38.87 | Max Shank | Ah, it's like. Well, it reminds me of a phrase. Ah, Beggars can't be choosers but Buyers can. |
| 12:53.50 | mikebledsoe | Ah, you know what's funny is I grew up hearing beggars can't be choosers and I never heard the second part did you well? Okay I felt like my dad jipped me up until you filled down like. |
| 13:00.30 | Max Shank | That's because I made up the second part. Yeah, no, everybody's dad chipped them like it's a ridiculous face baggars can't be choosers. That's that's like saying you'll always be weak. But leaving out the part unless you exercise but Buyers buyers can be extremely choosy you can if I mean if you have the dough you can make anything go are you kidding me? It's ridiculous. What people will do I can. |
| 13:20.17 | mikebledsoe | Ah, yeah, man, our parents did the best they could. |
| 13:29.90 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, know now. |
| 13:35.20 | Max Shank | I Can swipe my finger on my magic telephone and I can have if I wanted to I could have ah massuse a pizza and drugs delivered to my house probably within the hour. |
| 13:50.98 | mikebledsoe | Especially especially if you're in Medine columbia yeah well you have the right? you have the right? Well, there's just fewer people. You can get all the same stuff from there. It's but ah. |
| 13:52.86 | Max Shank | That's amazing. Or or if you're here and you have enough to buy it. |
| 14:05.89 | Max Shank | Oh I see what you're saying. |
| 14:09.53 | mikebledsoe | Ah, it's actually more convenient there believe it or not but ah, ah, do we want to? um, let's dig in a productivity. |
| 14:23.87 | Max Shank | Productivity yes, productivity is a competition that entrepreneurs have with each other to see the size of their entrepreneur dick hey blood. So how many books did you read this week |
| 14:37.60 | mikebledsoe | Just 1 and a half yeah ah |
| 14:39.39 | Max Shank | Fucking pussy I read 7 or it's like ah ah and so I think to just prove my point like the whole idea of the productivity. Ah, as ah as like a status symbol. Is is really unhealthy, right? It's ridiculous. It kind of reminds me of speed reading though too. You know how there's all these things about like oh speed reading and it's like no man like you don't need more information you need. |
| 15:03.38 | mikebledsoe | It's ridiculous. Well, there's a few reasons well ah 1 of the things. |
| 15:10.51 | mikebledsoe | Like know. |
| 15:16.89 | Max Shank | Better retention. You need more application of the stuff you're doing. It might be better to read slower actually so you are not in like this frantic mental state of like I got to get through this as fast as possible I think speed reading is actually um. |
| 15:28.40 | mikebledsoe | But what. |
| 15:35.64 | Max Shank | Like ah wolf and sheep's clothing kind of where it's like oh yes, be I would like to read that book a lot faster. It's like would you I mean I don't know if. |
| 15:43.70 | mikebledsoe | Maybe maybe well here's the thing here's the thing is the um and actually I want to tie this back into coaching later because I want to get into this all it all actually ties in together. But ah. Productivity is like speed reading speed reading is great and some speed reading your comprehension stays the same or goes down in which case, maybe not so great. But if there's a speed reading technique that also Improves retention. Which Jim quick is a guy who claims that not only will you read like 6 times faster but you'll retain 2 to 3 times better as Well. So 1 is are you lowering the quality by by improving the quantity ah and could that. Could it be true that that you could have both and then my the question I ask is well what books are you reading or your speed reading and taking in all this information but is the information useful to you right now is it something that that. Is it actually good information or is it information that's going to take you away from your your goal.. There's just as many bad books out there as there are good books just like everything else in the world. |
| 17:07.66 | Max Shank | That's 1 of the that's 1 of the values of a coach is helping you decipher because information is free but a coach helps you decipher which information is going to kill you and which information is going to heal you and this example of. |
| 17:19.82 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and this. |
| 17:25.80 | Max Shank | Speed reading makes me think of the difference between active and productive because I think if we're going to talk about productivity. We need to talk about yield like what is the product. What is the gross domestic product. How much production is happening. |
| 17:29.61 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 17:43.58 | Max Shank | How much produce is there at the end of it. It's so funny how that word has like everything built and because we think of produce as like fruit basically right fruits and vegetables. But it's it's the product of our effort right? So it's not about whether we are active. |
| 17:54.21 | mikebledsoe | Bam. Right? yeah. People do confuse productivity with being busy. Yeah. |
| 18:03.14 | Max Shank | Because. Well, that's where the busy badge comes in right? people think there's some sort of honor or moral superiority. If. You're a busy person. Oh I'm just staying busy I'm like oh god I'm so sad for you. You know like Hunter gatherers I can understand why those guys would be busy. |
| 18:24.40 | mikebledsoe | Well idle hands are the work of the devil. So. |
| 18:26.33 | Max Shank | But. |
| 18:30.17 | Max Shank | Ah, ah, ah yeah, you have all these like ah traps of like good and bad because that's what nurture does ah the parent, the parent child role. The coach student role. The teacher student role is all about. Go towards these things and go away from these things. Basically the the whole point really is to have you make better decisions and with human beings. It's a little more complex than with Gorillas Gorillas It's like this green plant is poison and this green plant is food. And they have this really big kind of Encyclopedia of which plants they can eat and that's the most important this is good. This is bad type of nurturing that guerrillas get basically but for human beings. |
| 19:22.93 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 19:26.86 | Max Shank | Have all these other complexities where it's like ah yes, ah you know suffering is a virtue so people get this certificate of suffering and oh it's it's good to be busy idle hands for the Devil's plaything um yeah you know it reminds me. There are just so many of these. Traps I always think of it like traps and treasures right? and when it comes to productivity this this false idea that just being active being busy is good. Um, if you're stuck in a rut then. |
| 19:48.11 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 20:04.77 | Max Shank | Then getting active is the best thing you can do like if you're doing nothing go for a walk doodle on a piece of paper read a book get back in motion because inertia is a real thing like if you're at zero whatever you can do to go to 1 is great. But. |
| 20:20.79 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, and if you can move even if it's not in the right direction. It's usually a pendulum involved. You're gonna wobble around something. Yeah. |
| 20:23.63 | Max Shank | The last thing you wanted. |
| 20:28.52 | Max Shank | Yeah, you can slingshot around to the other direction you can slingshot around to the other direction. Um, so back to the idea of productive versus active. There are a lot of ways to. Be productive but you have to be aware of what the yield is of what you're doing and I think 1 of the most important things really is just recognizing that being busy isn't inherently good and I think that's really tough for entrepreneurs because there's this mentality. Tough it out and grind through and I can make it but I don't know I I try to instill this idea that we have the benefit of so many ancestors writing down their ideas. We should be able to work like a couple hours a day. And provide for ourselves the exact life that we want to and if you if you compound the effects of your effort It's very easy to do that. But if you don't then it's going to be very difficult. |
| 21:30.29 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 21:39.31 | mikebledsoe | You know it's the um thing about being efficient versus effective and when you're talking about yield and so ah, you know, being in the entrepreneurial world and hanging out with a bunch of. |
| 21:49.69 | Max Shank | Right. |
| 21:58.53 | mikebledsoe | These tech guys So many people are microdosing or taking nootropics so they can get more done in a day but have you ever just sat down and ask yourself what are you building like Great. You're working on this but what's it for you know why. Ah, what's the end result and or you're talking about productivity and yield and and you could look at the quantity of the yield I'm producing something that's generating all this income or or this particular product but is that to me for me the question I ask myself is. Is the product I'm creating and satisfying is is it satisfying to me. Um, and and what's the impact that's having on the entire Planet. You know everybody else as well and is that satisfying is that impact satisfying for me and so I think you have. |
| 22:42.97 | Max Shank | Oof yeah. |
| 22:51.44 | Max Shank | Oh my God yeah. |
| 22:55.81 | mikebledsoe | We have like ah a whole lot of people running around and not just entrepreneurs but like I know people It's probably even worse for people who just have jobs and they're trying to be really productive with their job and then come to find out you know their job is you know liquor distribution and you know. I'm not actually sure I want you to be really good at that like distribution of 1 of the most harmful drugs on the Planet. Ah, and you know I know I'm crazy. |
| 23:23.70 | Max Shank | Wait wait wait wait but alcohol is perfectly. Legal Mike How can you say that is fully approved able to be drunk I'm sure by everybody you can buy it right at the store. |
| 23:32.51 | mikebledsoe | Is it by the fda is it did the fda prove it. Yeah interesting. Yeah so that. |
| 23:40.90 | Max Shank | Once again, there's there's another. There's another like set of rules that that probably ah only make your life worse if you follow them exactly right. |
| 23:51.87 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well and so this makes me think of like how far are we expanding am I more predictive. How am I more productive in this minute what's it mean to be productive. You know for the next sixty seconds. Well. |
| 24:05.93 | Max Shank | Well, how do you measure? How do you? What? what are you measuring I mean I. |
| 24:10.70 | mikebledsoe | Well, we'll say I'm writing how many words did I write in sixty seconds right so I'm writing a book but but ah all right? We zoom out how do be how do I be productive and in the next hour how do I be more productive in the next day years you start expanding out and then the. |
| 24:14.48 | Max Shank | Right? right. |
| 24:25.23 | Max Shank | Well. |
| 24:29.29 | mikebledsoe | That things that you have to consider and then the actual behavior starts to change huh. |
| 24:29.63 | Max Shank | But the amount of words don't mer right? but the amount of words are not equal to your productivity. You have to you could say it's the amount of dollars you could say the profit. Um, even the word product is ah. |
| 24:42.62 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah. |
| 24:49.87 | Max Shank | Multiplication like if you multiply 3 times 2 the product is 6 so just to give like 2 super opposite examples. You could say you know the Meth lord of the appellations has. |
| 24:51.27 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 25:08.85 | Max Shank | Ah, really high efficiency and effectiveness. Maybe he makes like a million in profit every week or something like that and he's also dooming people to a life of Meth addiction a short life probably of me addiction but a life of math addiction nonetheless. So that guy is product from a monetary standpoint is extremely high then on the other hand you have let's say a japanese fella who's a a carpenter of some kind and all he does is make that fancy furniture that has no screws in it and it takes him. A ridiculous amount of hours you know and everything has to fit perfectly like a little puzzle and you know let's say he spends wow I don't know enough forty forty hours on something and he sells it for 1000 dollars which doesn't sound like. An amazing hourly rate. But let's just say that's what he does but he's like enjoying the whole process. His father did that before him his father before him you could argue that the product or the result of his effort over time is something extremely valuable and special. And that the experience itself is very good. But if you just measured how much money it brought in you would say that guy is a fool and the Meth lord of the appellations is a genius and he is way more productive. So I think there's a quantitative aspect which. |
| 26:39.26 | mikebledsoe | See. |
| 26:45.92 | Max Shank | I mean it has to be profit right? or people served um and then there's a qualitative aspect of. Do you enjoy the process and what is this doing to further your um Idea. Of how you'd like to participate in the world something like that. |
| 27:05.48 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it's a lot to consider and people normally don't take the time to think these things through they just do. They're trying to survive the next day or the next week so I'm saying that they if you're too if you're shortsighted. You'll just keep doing. Ah, same thing. But if you are able to like a ah guy I know very very successful. He said 1 day ordinary people think in years extraordinary people think in decades and ah the really successful people. And this guy is probably worth close to a billion dollars at this point and he's been playing this game for you know 50 years he's seventy and this this game of accumulation of wealth and from iowa farm boy. So. It's not like it was. |
| 27:59.57 | Max Shank | Um, well he understands Leverage clearly. |
| 28:01.69 | mikebledsoe | Wasn't taught to him from a as a child on how to do this stuff very much so but he also planned in decades and he somehow because and you know some people are more suited for for this than others and people who. |
| 28:10.18 | Max Shank | Yeah. |
| 28:18.41 | Max Shank | No doubt. |
| 28:21.42 | mikebledsoe | People who have it have more space and money and things like this tend to be able to think further out. But if you're somebody who doesn't have a lot and you can expand your thinking out and consider more that meth idea sounds a lot less attractive than say the carpentry job even though. Total income is higher but but you could also um, you know, maybe that's where they start 1 guy starts at a million. The other guy starts at at at ah a carpenter at at this or that price and man there's just so many other ways to to make that that carpenter. |
| 28:40.37 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 28:58.89 | mikebledsoe | More valuable to other people in a way that in his work that he can demand more dollars per per thing he produces. |
| 29:05.65 | Max Shank | Well and you know suppose he's like very comfortable with the amount that he's charging right? Um, it all reminds me of the old story. The richest man in Babylon where the 1 guy invests his paycheck with the rich man and his friends all just. Spend their paychecks right away and I was actually on a podcast with a couple of guys who are doctors at johns hopkins and they were like well what's the what's the secret to wealth and I was like deferred gratification. And they're like anything else and I was like no, it's like do you have the ability to trade what you want now for what you want most and if you do you're going to do really? Well if you're. |
| 29:43.79 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 29:55.48 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 29:58.24 | Max Shank | Using your neocortex if you're using your third eye to come up with a ah plan that involves multiplying yourself and multiplying the yield or the product of your efforts. You will be rich. There's just no question about it and if you trade. What you want most for what you want now, you'll you'll probably be obese you probably won't ever um, make lots and lots of money I mean even something like medical school. That's a big upfront investment with no payoff for quite a while. So the longer you can defer that. Yeah, maybe ever yeah, true and the longer. |
| 30:33.36 | mikebledsoe | Maybe ever I Know a lot of people who went to medical school who yeah they have an M D next to her name but they're not even interested in doing that now. |
| 30:45.98 | Max Shank | Well I mean look if I could go back in time I would tell myself to drop out of high school because there's a fundamental realities about value that they just like they teach you the opposite you know they. |
| 31:00.50 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, great. |
| 31:03.47 | Max Shank | Write this essay. It has to be 3000 words what? huh like it has to be a certain amount of words this is ridiculous. So it completely misses the point of what is useful. Yeah. |
| 31:09.67 | mikebledsoe | Um, yeah I'm actually doing that exercise that exercise you told me about last week wow this is I'm actually like I'm I'm gonna I'm gonna pick it back up later today. |
| 31:20.67 | Max Shank | How fun is that amazing. Ah dude we should ah we should read them to each other or we should send them when we're done. You're an animal I Love it. Ah. |
| 31:28.54 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 31:33.59 | mikebledsoe | I'm going to post mine as a blog. Ah, what we're talking about is letters to our 12 year old selves. So yeah I'm gonna you know what? I I think people would enjoy it There's definitely be some stuff in there. That's gonna. |
| 31:42.54 | Max Shank | Yeah, what a great writing exercise. |
| 31:56.39 | mikebledsoe | Caused people to cock their head but you know like. |
| 31:58.68 | Max Shank | Mind mindsful of horribly obscene jokes. Um. |
| 32:05.88 | mikebledsoe | Ah, so what's cool about that exercise is we do get to zoom out on time and retrospectively and 1 of the the benefits of writing a letter to 12 year old self that I've found already is that a lot of the advice I'm giving my 12 year old self is the same advice I give myself now. |
| 32:23.50 | Max Shank | Right? Just just probably in a simpler and kinder way. |
| 32:24.75 | mikebledsoe | Ah. Yeah,, there's There's a lot.. There's a lot of stuff I was telling myself that's not for me now. But there's also some things in there where it's like do less of this and more of that like yeah I could do more less of that more that now. Um, but yeah I think I think. |
| 32:39.53 | Max Shank | M. |
| 32:46.35 | mikebledsoe | Understanding and what we're talking about here is being effective knowing knowing the end result of your work and I tell people it's like efficiency is great. But if you're not, you know if that's your sole focus is efficiency where a lot of people when they think about productivity they think about efficiency and. It is ah ah just it's going back to that busy thing like what are you doing? Why are you doing it. What's the end result whether there's money involved or not. |
| 33:17.69 | Max Shank | I would say that productive is anything that brings you toward what you want I think that's maybe even better. So like let's say ah you you have this desired identity. |
| 33:23.30 | mikebledsoe | No I like that. So. |
| 33:35.64 | Max Shank | And I think I've talked to you about this before you know Simon Sinek has that thing it starts with why James clear's ah, Habit stuff is by me synthesized into it starts with who and you have this I you have this self image. |
| 33:38.98 | mikebledsoe | Start a. |
| 33:45.64 | mikebledsoe | Ah. |
| 33:53.56 | Max Shank | Right? You have this idea of yourself and what you would like that self to look like so anything that brings you closer to that ultimate ideal is going to be productive right? It doesn't have to just be um. You know X amount of profits. That's usually a byproduct of your enthusiasm and impact. |
| 34:18.94 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, what about Ah I don't think we can talk about productivity or any of this without time about goal setting because the ah because that's exactly what you're talking about is well what is it that you want to achieve. And actually sitting down to think about these things I think again going back to the decades. It's like what do you want to achieve this is where I start all my students is what do you want to be different in ten years and than it is right now who do you have to be to your point who do you have to be. Who is the person who does this are you committed to becoming that person and what. |
| 34:58.58 | Max Shank | Right? Or or like I tell people you know what would you want to have done if you couldn't get any credit just to hone in on what you really think is valuable like who you really want to help with. |
| 35:08.55 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I mean that's a whole other. Yeah, that's a whole other conversation like what do you really? desire? Most people have no idea what their desires are you put a you put a because behind a goal and they have to tell you why if it's a real goal if it's actually their goal. It'll give it teeth. It's not their goal and maybe it's their dad's goal for them or what they imagine? yeah. |
| 35:30.50 | Max Shank | Second hand I think I think um, pretty much every goal is second hand most of it's just dependent on how we want to fit into the hierarchy. You know as a male I'm guessing most of the people listening to it are fellows. But if there any ladies out there. Hello ladies. Ah. |
| 35:38.94 | mikebledsoe | A. |
| 35:45.39 | mikebledsoe | Seventy five percent guys yeah what |
| 35:49.70 | Max Shank | Seventy five percent guys yeah that doesn't surprise me. Um, what's interesting and is in our culture. Ah men don't really have intrinsic value. Their value is correlated to what they can produce whereas women and children have intrinsic value. |
| 36:01.27 | mikebledsoe | Where. |
| 36:07.80 | Max Shank | That's why if the boat sinks you and I like are somehow left out of the fucking lifeboats because they're like what about those guys? Yeah yeah, what? what can we have enough paddlers already. They have no value. Yeah, so easy. |
| 36:16.42 | mikebledsoe | We can get. We can get more of them. They're easy disposable. |
| 36:24.15 | Max Shank | So it's all Ah, it's all related to what you can produce I mean the reason that fellasas get mansions and Ferraris isn't to like impress their other guy friends. It's to show that they ah deserve a good lady and that they can be a protector and that they're alpha yeah that they're alpha. |
| 36:31.86 | mikebledsoe | No no. |
| 36:38.24 | mikebledsoe | Produce and protect. Yeah. |
| 36:43.79 | Max Shank | In some way, right? It used to be like oh who's the really the really big man who has like a really big stick and can club a mammoth I don't know what it was really like probably something like that and now and now it's more like. Who's the guy with the mx black card that guy can that guy can do anything kind of back to our that adds like 5 inches to your penis size. Are you kidding me and it goes back to our phrase of beggars can't be choosers but Buyers can. |
| 37:03.90 | mikebledsoe | Like you whip it out slap down the counter hear. It thud the yeah at least? yeah. |
| 37:21.61 | Max Shank | I Mean that's ah, that's a blank Check you can have anything you want in that life and most of the problems that you might be concerned about that. Keep you in that lizard brain immediate decision making. Kind of evaporate you know money doesn't solve everything. Certainly there are lots of problems that a money doesn't solve but some of them it solves instantly like some some some real problems like I've been I've been very broke well look I've been. |
| 37:42.95 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, well most the problems that people who don't have it are are experiencing. |
| 37:53.61 | Max Shank | Very broke. Ah, and I've been not broke and the second 1 is way way way better like it. It didn't solve every problem I have but it's way better. So I think um, as ah as a man, there's a. |
| 37:59.42 | mikebledsoe | Way better. Oh. |
| 38:13.10 | Max Shank | There's a certain reality to the fact that we don't have an intrinsic value. It's just what we can produce so a lot of people just blindly chase that goal because that's that's what they've Seen. You know that's the current mythology if you're a rich guy hey great and if you're a poor guy good luck. Good luck finding a lady I think that's what made that book fifty shades of gray work out so well because the guy was really rich if it was like ah a fry cook at Mcdonald's like beating some lady in his mom's basement I don't think it would like sell any copies at all. |
| 38:50.46 | mikebledsoe | Um, ah so True. Um I I was reading a book on relationships and they made a really solid point which is men are judged on ah their success. Basically their financial success. And women are judged on their beauty and if if women if you know sometimes women talk about you know it's not fair this and that it's not fair for guys either like like if how what percentage of guys are really wealthy. You know, probably about his. |
| 39:19.86 | Max Shank | Oh. |
| 39:27.21 | mikebledsoe | The the same percentage of women who are really beautiful and you know women get to enjoy the the results of their beauty at a young age and men get to ah experience the success later in the game. So It's you know. Like a woman who's passed her prime. It's like well you did have a prime and maybe this guy's just not there yet. So It is I mean this is just exactly why there's a lot of older men dating younger women but not a lot of older women dating younger men. It just doesn't make sense. |
| 39:59.22 | Max Shank | I was just thinking about that and isn't it funny to see who gets really pissed off by those relationships I think hey look I mean if that 20 year old lady wants that guy for his money and he wants her for her looks then they deserve each other. |
| 40:05.79 | mikebledsoe | Yeah I. |
| 40:17.41 | mikebledsoe | Perfect match. Yeah I watch people get upset about other people's relationships like man how she treats him or how he treats her or how they are together I'm like yeah the perfect match. What do you expect like. |
| 40:17.79 | Max Shank | I Mean what the heck's wrong with that that they they they know what they're getting into. |
| 40:32.80 | Max Shank | It's probably just virtue signaling right? is probably just hoping that their ah faux outrage can attract the ah attention of someone on their level right? Oh yeah, I'm I'm upset by that too. How could that. |
| 40:43.50 | mikebledsoe | So that's right? Um, um, um, not only yeah, we're both better than them. Yeah, it's crazy why I well and I think there's going back I Want to go back to like the the beginning beginning. Um. |
| 40:48.89 | Max Shank | Oil tycoon marry that stripper I was like you don't get it. |
| 41:02.72 | mikebledsoe | And talk about people doing shit that they really don't want to do like if you really want to be productive and effective in the ways that you want to be most of the time you got to do things differently than the way you're doing them now and breaking those patterns can be really really difficult. Um, are you familiar with the four tendencies. There's a personality test. |
| 41:21.48 | Max Shank | No I think I have a few more tendencies in that but I can't discuss them on the podcast. |
| 41:27.80 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, it basically breaks it down into like there's really good information for coaches to know the four tendencies 1 of my 1 of my coaches actually put together presentation. Um, and which is living inside my little academy but ah. The idea is there are four tendencies that are made above 2 different attributes. 1 is I either. Ah want to meet the expectations of those outside of myself or I want to meet the expectations inside like that I have for myself. And then there's the rebellious piece which is like I reject the expectations of people outside of myself and I reject that inside of myself. So someone who is meeting the expectations externally and internally would be called I think it's an upholder and this person tends to be very effective is. |
| 42:14.26 | Max Shank | Flow. |
| 42:21.61 | Max Shank | No doubt. |
| 42:23.35 | mikebledsoe | They're meeting the expectations of the world and they have high expectations of themselves and they're always doing that they seem very orderly. They they follow the rules um and they don't need accountability. They're just they're accountable. Yeah, you can count on them and then you have you know the questioner. |
| 42:32.20 | Max Shank | Accountable, No no, they are accountable like you can count on them like they'll get it done. |
| 42:42.40 | mikebledsoe | And someone who Upholds their own but they they need a good reason if it's coming from outside you know if if they just they're gonna ask a lot of questions this and that and then there's ah, there's the person who ah will ah how it's a. |
| 42:48.30 | Max Shank | Her. |
| 43:00.81 | mikebledsoe | The obliger and this is the person who won't hold that their own expectations. They'll break their own expectations but they will definitely meet the expectations of the others. Yeah, and then there's the rebel who rejects the expectations internally and externally. |
| 43:08.88 | Max Shank | So it's like a matrix. Basically. |
| 43:18.42 | Max Shank | Um, I've been there. |
| 43:20.41 | mikebledsoe | And so ah so I ah you know I I don't think that like you're all the way 1 or another but I took the test and I fall heavily into the the rebellious side like rebellious maybe a little bit of questioning. Yeah yeah, so. |
| 43:33.71 | Max Shank | No, do you I'm shocked by that. |
| 43:39.46 | mikebledsoe | Ah, oh what's funny is I've been frustrated my the majority of my life have been frustrated and that I'll set goals and then just ah, my lack of consistency ah with with certain things. Some things I can be very consistent with other things I haven't. So ah, that's something that's plagued me my whole life and actually to me. It's a blessing because if I can figure out how to be productive and get things done I can teach anyone how to do it because the the Rebel the Rebel Ah really? Ah. What motivates a rebel is that they are experiencing choice. They need to think at least perceive that they have a choice from moment to moment and what they're gonna do right? and so because I have this tendency to ah. I I value choice over accountability or meeting expectations. Um, if I really want something I set up structures in my life to where I make the choices they're going to get me there. Easy. So I I yeah. |
| 44:47.25 | Max Shank | Um, probably makes you an excellent coach. |
| 44:55.13 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, so like I I know how to create structure for my own life in a way that guides me towards where I want to go for someone who has no interest in impressing other people or even myself and really is much more likely to just do things that feel good in the moment. Ah, and so there's It's like ah it's been a constant battle my whole life and as I've gotten older I've gotten very skilled at like if you walk into my home. You can you like you will immediately know this home is different. This home is made to you know I want to be healthy. So like there's. I've got a couple chairs but it's mostly floor seating. There's I make sure there's always fresh spring water available I have my gym space. That's always like like it's made for me to work work out and eat healthy like I have every. Piece of culinary tool that I need to to make a good meal I have yeah I have ah I have a grocery service that delivers food every week and I and I have ah have ah a software that I basically work off all the time. |
| 45:58.80 | Max Shank | It's like a trail of breadcrumbs that leads you to doing the right thing. |
| 46:12.89 | mikebledsoe | And I click ah when it's time for me to order the groceries it pops up I go in there I select the groceries takes me five minutes and then it automatically gets shipped I don't I don't have to hit the order button ever. So there's all these things these structures and these conditions I put in place that. |
| 46:24.48 | Max Shank | Um, and. |
| 46:32.83 | mikebledsoe | Really caused me to go that Direction. So Ah so what I found for myself. The other thing I have to do that that I don't think many other people do do is really set up a vision for my own life that that I. Um, excited about enough to create those structures to go through all the hassle knowing that you know I'm not going to feel like it tomorrow to do something I have to have to be very good with my planning and I find that I don't want to plan as much as. |
| 46:51.91 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 47:11.50 | mikebledsoe | As much as a lot of other people want to plan but I I get a lot of benefit out of it. So if I if I practice willpower in any area. It's it's in the planning phase of things. |
| 47:20.30 | Max Shank | Well your your brain and body adapt. So I think it sort of ties back into what we were talking about before is like what patterns did you develop at a very young age and recognizing. That you have the ability to change those patterns. It'll be more difficult if they're already ingrained. No question but it's possible. You know if you understand I mean you don't have to understand how neuroplasticity works you just need to understand that. Neuroplasticity works like I don't really know how it works I know your brain makes new connections and you know what is rewarded is repeated. But yeah, it um, makes me think back to productivity. And what you said about the groceries is a big part of it so productive isn't just how much um, what's the product of your effort It's also how can you say no to more things that you have more effort available because I always bring it. I feel like a broken record because every thing comes back to opportunity cost you know and whatever you're doing the cost of doing that is everything else. You could be doing and that is a crazy crazy reality when you think about it you know like. |
| 48:35.66 | mikebledsoe | Now. |
| 48:45.82 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 48:52.10 | Max Shank | I'm gonna go hang out with this person I don't really like that much. What? why what? you you could like be talking to a loved 1 or you could just be like going for a walk like you don't have to do that and so that's what I'm best at that is like totally my superpower. Is just to be like so comfortable saying no to things that I don't really want to do like I remember my my my good friend brian and if he listens to this will be so Funny. He's like I'm having this party and I was like oh who's gonna be there and he listed off like a bunch of people and was like I don't really like them that much but if you want to go get lunch next week I'm um happy to go do that and that ability has saved me so much mental space because you know once again opportunity cost like is the is the juice worth the squeeze essentially and I think that's the first thing that i. End up working with my coaching clients on when it's more like lifestyle and business related is how to draw better boundaries so that you just have more ah clear mental space for the things that are actually important because anytime you say no. You're saying yes to something Better. You're giving yourself the ability to say yes to something better and I think I mean I really think the power of no is like the most important superpower. |
| 50:10.32 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, um. |
| 50:21.87 | mikebledsoe | Absolutely I mean there's you know there's a few different cliche terms out there is like you got to say yes to things. There's a lot of things I had to say yes to and then I'd learn how to say no I to say yes to things that were scary to do. |
| 50:34.90 | Max Shank | Um, who right. |
| 50:40.17 | mikebledsoe | Yes, so things have scared me but also no to the things that that are pulling me away from it and yeah, there's so many people have people pleasing tendencies My my ex had it heavy people pleasing tendency and. |
| 50:51.41 | Max Shank | Oh My God My. Ah, right. |
| 50:59.90 | mikebledsoe | It was it. It really was ends up being very harmful. Yeah. |
| 51:03.46 | Max Shank | Yeah, stressful and I think a lot of people have that. Um you know Jordan peterson talks about how agreeability is usually a disadvantage when it comes to business and then my friend. |
| 51:17.53 | mikebledsoe | If you're agreeable, you make less money. You're not going to negotiate that ah that salary. |
| 51:21.48 | Max Shank | Who isn't right? You're just oh yeah, that's fine. This is is okay and what's interesting is my friend who went into the air force Academy they were doing this class on negotiation with this lawyer and 1 of their assignments was to go around and ask for free stuff. And see how difficult it was for people to say no like you just go to Jamba Juice and like hey can I have a free smoothie and the guy's like what I I don't think we can do that How about just a little 1 Okay, it's like wait. What like all you have to do is ask. |
| 51:42.31 | mikebledsoe | Me. |
| 51:56.83 | mikebledsoe | I hate. |
| 51:59.70 | Max Shank | Crazy and it's It's true for so many things that um, you know people were so emotional like our superpowers are talking walking and being emotional. That's what human beings are better at than the other animals. Really so we're. We're deeply and we're not good at much other stuff. Ah, we're not ah, we're so aware most people of the feeling of rejection like we don't want to reject other people. We don't want other people to reject us and if you can get over that you. Will be successful because you will put out a lot of offers and it's way better to get half a percent of people to say yes, if you ask a million people than it is to get 1 hundred percent of people to say yes, if you only ask 5 and those four knows just Like. Daggers in your heart that make you question whether you're even good at anything so that ability to to ask without fearing rejection and also reject without thinking like oh oh you said no to me? Well I hate you. It's like oh okay, like. |
| 53:15.25 | mikebledsoe | Ah, sounds childish I went through a phase I went through a phase in my early twenty s where I I intentionally I'm not saying this is a good idea folks I went through a phase where I intentionally used pickup lines that would get me shot down at the bar. |
| 53:16.66 | Max Shank | Stupid. Yeah. |
| 53:31.69 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 53:33.75 | mikebledsoe | I'd walk out to a woman and then I would say something like how do you like your eggs in the morning she goes what so scrambled to fertilized and or something like that which pretty much would invite a slap. You know, not just a rejection but you know like ah, an f you. So ah, it was it was. |
| 53:57.37 | Max Shank | Although I think that's a good filter too because someone who's likely to lay down with you would probably find that funny. |
| 54:05.95 | mikebledsoe | That's also true. That's also true. Ah, but ah huh go dirty early? Yeah yeah I mean the my my current girlfriend on my my bump. Um. |
| 54:07.83 | Max Shank | Go dirty early if you're if you're talking to late and if you're talking to ladies. This could get so dark So fast. |
| 54:21.80 | mikebledsoe | My bumble account. Yeah, my bumble account with my current girlfriend now just to give you some some context psychotherapist from the Bay right? So you're probably this is this is probably someone who's got like very indoctrinated with feminist ideas. So I'm not I'm not saying femin feminism's good or bad or anything like that I'm just saying that. Ah someone who is hyper feminist and does not have a sense of Humor. It will not enjoy me and in the the first part of my bumble account. Ah, it says. I just want a good woman to be able cook me dinner and give me a massage and then that was the headline and then it goes down and then I get into more like what I actually want um because I do want those things too I do want those things but ah, but it was funny is because we talked about it and she like gave an eye roll. |
| 55:04.20 | Max Shank | None. Wait You don't want those things who doesn't want those things. |
| 55:19.37 | mikebledsoe | Over it. But as more time goes on. She's realizing that she actually did want it. You know subconsciously and so ah, you know, being with a guy who's actually very masculine is is new for her and allows her to be feminine and that actually feels really nice. |
| 55:32.32 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 55:38.14 | Max Shank | Could do a whole thing on that we could do a whole thing on that I mean I think right now. Yeah, maybe next show is like the feminization of men and the masculinization of women think that's ah, probably making life really hard for a lot of people. |
| 55:38.59 | mikebledsoe | But ah, but there was a filter. Yeah, maybe next show. |
| 55:50.54 | mikebledsoe | Um, well I Well I think it's a natural progression so we'll we'll talk about this next show. But I I think there's ah you know life is not all unicorns and butterflies and having this. |
| 55:58.46 | Max Shank | Um, yeah. |
| 56:10.52 | mikebledsoe | Reversal of of roles is is definitely part of our evolution but there's a lesson to be learned from it and there there is a continuation beyond that we'll talk about that. But um, yeah, it definitely I don't know what I was talking about now. But. |
| 56:28.12 | Max Shank | We're talking about saying yes to things and no to other things. |
| 56:30.40 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, but ah, creating creating filter I got used to getting shot down. So then I could I got really good at creating a filter and knowing that by by filtering out 99 percent that 1 percent was gonna be fucking super sweet and. |
| 56:34.82 | Max Shank | Ah, yeah. |
| 56:45.92 | Max Shank | Yeah, you build up the no callous Also like you get comfortable just being told. No. |
| 56:50.88 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, so I would ask way more girls out than the average guy because I was just like I get shot down like okay I've been shot down like a Hundred times. No big deal. |
| 56:56.54 | Max Shank | And you'll but I mean just think of what a disadvantage you're at if you are in a scarcity mindset when it comes to relationships I mean look if you choose a mate just based on looks. And you have a scarcity mindset so you don't ask out a lot of people. What are the odds that that relationship is going to be good. Are you kidding me like you you are going to have your life ruined because you're going to feel like I mean that's 1 of the that's 1 of the biggest decisions in your life. |
| 57:20.88 | mikebledsoe | Yeah. |
| 57:32.81 | Max Shank | You're telling me, you're going to date 1 person cling to them like hell because you're afraid to ask somebody else and you're going to choose them just based on their outward appearance via some like optic trick like are you the the chance that you're going to have like oh my god like. |
| 57:44.67 | mikebledsoe | Man I've seen so I've seen that play out so many times. |
| 57:52.46 | Max Shank | It's the worst way to choose a mate from a scarcity mindset and just based on like the visual trickery of what they can do with ah a makeup box and if they I mean who knows like it's just ridiculous I'm saying this I'm saying this knowing by the way. |
| 58:04.92 | mikebledsoe | Oh man. |
| 58:11.59 | Max Shank | That the lower levels of my brain. It's like ah a retarded monkey in a banana factory like I can't think from 1 second to the next. |
| 58:22.00 | mikebledsoe | No I'm making a note for next week so that we know what to talk about um because I do feel like we're complete on this productivity front now that we're talking about how to choose how to choose a mate. |
| 58:35.47 | Max Shank | Now The question is was this podcast productive and here's how we can tell if the podcast made listeners take an action that brings them closer to what they want. Then it was a productive podcast but that's not the only reason I'm doing this podcast I Also really enjoy our conversations. |
| 59:00.22 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, that was the every time we got on the phone we we well I thought I'm about you but I thought this should be recorded I think people would really enjoy this. Um and I was hanging on my buddy Josh has last or yesterday and he was asking me about you know. |
| 59:09.99 | Max Shank | Um, yeah, same. |
| 59:19.66 | mikebledsoe | Are you gonna podcast I'm like oh I'm podcasting I'm recording with Ma Shank I've been posting them over on my channel but I haven't I We haven't made the the move yet I feel like where we're out with the show is like like figuring out. Flow of it a bit and I I imagine we're going to start circling a theme which I'm not I don't see a clear theme yet. But I think we'll circle a theme that's going to make sense people know what to expect when they show up. |
| 59:50.51 | Max Shank | I mean I think the theme is pretty clear you and I are doing a mind meld to basically discuss how to avoid traps and how to find treasure and it encompasses your physical ability your relationships. Your um, psychological resolve and ability to evaluate your situation I mean ah you make better decisions and I'm also really funny. |
| 01:00:17.41 | mikebledsoe | What's the what's the benefit people get from listening to this. |
| 01:00:26.70 | mikebledsoe | Ah, ah, ah, better decisions I think there's a better way I I'm thinking about a marketing from a marketing perspective. We want people to see the name and go oh I gotta listen to that podcast. What's the benefit people are giving. That's what we got to figure out folks. Please. |
| 01:00:37.95 | Max Shank | Ah. |
| 01:00:43.49 | mikebledsoe | Shoot me a dm let me know I just put it I haven've been posting on the bletzout show since last November so I just started posting him up there. It's it looks like it's getting downloads I've got yeah I've got it up there under the bloodzo show. But I don't yeah. |
| 01:00:43.90 | Max Shank | Where are you posting these by the way. |
| 01:00:51.50 | Max Shank | Oh really do we get any feedback is it still called the blood social. |
| 01:01:03.41 | mikebledsoe | Um, there's I would have to start a whole another account and submit it to oh well, we should just all ah send you over the links I'll send you over the ah the. |
| 01:01:05.47 | Max Shank | We could put them on. We could put them on mine too I have a max shank show. |
| 01:01:15.95 | Max Shank | Yeah, we could try that out that'd be fun I Think for some reason I'm also I'm way dirtier on these than I normally am like I usually am like oh I'm going to try not to curse and then I'm thinking Oh Mike's audience these people are degenerates just like me. So. |
| 01:01:21.93 | mikebledsoe | Files. |
| 01:01:30.32 | mikebledsoe | Bunch of animals. Yeah I I I ran the name deviant dialogue by my girlfriend and for the name of the show. She was like no she says it's too dark. Oh. |
| 01:01:33.91 | Max Shank | Bunch of animals. |
| 01:01:43.97 | Max Shank | No, it's not good. Yeah. |
| 01:01:50.48 | mikebledsoe | She's like yeah people are gonna think deviant and they're gonna think devil and I was like oh shit. Okay I didn't think about that. |
| 01:01:53.42 | Max Shank | No, it's not actually a good name for a show but I mean it it does come back around to like how to coach yourself. Basically. |
| 01:02:05.26 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah. |
| 01:02:07.83 | Max Shank | I Don't know we'll think of something it doesn't have to be Maybe that's the last lesson for productivity is it doesn't have to be perfect for you to launch it out there like a lot of a lot of stuff I've done it evolved into something good. |
| 01:02:18.31 | mikebledsoe | That's true. Well, it's technically going out imperfectly it. It's being put out imperfectly. It's it doesn't even have a name and so I'm just throwing it up on a channel and and. |
| 01:02:25.92 | Max Shank | But that. |
| 01:02:31.97 | Max Shank | That's great. |
| 01:02:33.67 | mikebledsoe | Maybe some people are listening to it I mean it's getting downloads I know that but who knows yeah and more downloads as I post more which makes me think that it's doing something but I've yet to get any feedback being like oh I started listening your show I Love it imit. Well we'll see what happens all right. |
| 01:02:37.89 | Max Shank | That's pretty cool. |
| 01:02:46.82 | Max Shank | Um, ah I like it until next week that's been some good planning for both of us. Ah, that's been some good planning for most both of us. We just have a monthly. |
| 01:02:53.61 | mikebledsoe | Wrap this bad boy up Yeah, tell me where they can find you huh what? a weekly a weekly appointments in my calendar. It's easy. |
| 01:03:04.82 | Max Shank | Ah, monthly appointment where we sit down and talk how well has that worked. Yeah, that's what I'm saying it's great. Did I say monthly I meant weekly I don't have a lot of appointments. |
| 01:03:13.57 | mikebledsoe | Yeah, yeah, all right? Where can people find you no. |
| 01:03:20.53 | Max Shank | ah ah I'm hard to find maxshank dot com or at Maxank anywhere else. |
| 01:03:27.10 | mikebledsoe | So off I mean at mike underscore blood so on Instagram and the strong coach if you're looking to give me money all right? Thanks for joining us today. Yes. |
| 01:03:37.32 | Max Shank | Have a productive week |
Max Shank and Mike Bledsoe start a new experiment.